Tucker's Tales


Greetings From The Womb

Posted by Tara Bilby on May 9, 2012 at 9:45 AM

If you have been on Facebook recently, there are 2 things that I am sure you have seen. Pictures of shoes, and pictures of children  fetus aliens in the womb. We all look back on our childhood and can remember exact moments when you think NOOO! MOM!!... HOW COULD YOU?!

Thank. God. Facebook wasn't around in my parents days. I would like to think my parents wouldn't be the type to put pictures of my moms inners on the interweb.. but pride and love for your children make you do a lot of weird and unusual things. With every womb picture I see.. a piece of my heart goes out to the little child who sees a picture of themself in the womb for the first time.

I understand wanting to update your friends on the progress of your child, but let's face it.. about 60% of your Facebook friends aren't really friends. 5% are ex boyfriends or girlfriends, 10% are current significant others of those ex boyfriends or girlfriends and the rest are just people who want to creep on your pictures (the only thing Facebook has left going for it now that Twitter has taken over). Now do you think these people want to creep on pictures of your uterus? 

Things need to change. If you want to update me on your child's progress here are some appropriate ways of doing so:

Tell me what size your child is by comparing them to fruit.

As your child grows, Simply post, "my child is size egg today." "my child is moving up in the world, my child is now a size Cantaloupe." "My child has moved to size cantaloup to size watermelon." I would geniunly be interested in what size fruit your child currently is on a monthly basis. This is the type of stuff that interests me.

Tell me what organ or body part has developed that week,

As your child grows its spine simply post "my child now has a backbone. #badass #takingaftertheirmother."

As they begin kicking say "my child is already starting to kick me... a rebel and she doesnt even have hair yet."

When your child is born, it is then appropriate to post a picture of the badass/rebel that I have pictured in my head as coming out with a bandana, and a few tattoos.

Categories: Guest Blog Entries

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