Joined Sep 19 2012
In so original, if you fake being me this will arrive at your house; "Roses are Red, Your blood is too, Violets are blue,Just like you *punches into ground*
Look guys, Ive been here for about 5 years and things (personally) have been getting worse an worse as the years go by. ive become more of a bother then a friend to most people; im just getting in the way most days. And hey, I can admit when I dont belong some where. I wont sit and complain about it. Ill simply get up and leave to find where I do belong. Lh12... i dont feel I belong here anymore. Im always left out of convorsations and rping... where do I even start with rp? I feel the whole site goes quiet when im on, and only comes to life if I leave.
I get it, i know how it feels. When youre with your friends and some random person just wont leave you and your friends alone. Ive been in both spots before. We never say it to eithers face... but we always think it. As the bystander we beg to be included, but as the insider we beg theyd just go away. Its human nature and I understand that.
So.. what am I trying to say? I dont know, a lot of things really. I dont want to be left out, but I also dont want to be a bother. Often I think of quitting, and I have many times, but im always drawn back with the hope of all of my doubts being proven wrong.... time an time again theyre proven right instead. My Goal wasnt to make enemies or become that person everyone gives up the site just to get away from.
Yet that person I've become anyways. I can take it, im a big girl. I guess im just a little tired of the charade and false hope I feed myself time and time again. All the Rps I start and get excited over... just ot watch them drown because I become to annoying or boring. I havn't decided if I want to leave or not. I have a goal I still want to fulfill before I leave forever.
To conclude... I guess I needed to get all of that out. Its hard to tell through a screen what emotion I wrote this with. A lot will guess anger or agression based on the length and way I worded everything. In truth? If these words were a voice it would be calm, a normal speaking tone. One just trying to speaks its mind, not screaming or crying.
But sadly, those who read will doubt that and believe im being passive agressive. I guess Ill be the only one to truly know how I want this message portrayed. I just don't want to lie anymore I want to be 100% honest with how I feel. Maybe someone else feels the same way? I dunno.
Just.. enjoy your time here while its your era ^^