With a tink and a tap and a rat a tat tat.
Its raining outside, imagine that.
With a plink and a thump and a thunderous thaaawk.
The rain pelts the roof, sounding just like that!
Dinkley drop, pinkley hop all in a wap.
The rain bounces and hops all about with a snap.
In a sheet, or a torrent, or a tremendous roar,
The rain courses by, loud as a musical score!
In a rap rap rap and a tat tat tat and a pat pat pat,
The rain announces it arrival on the top of my hat!
With a dink dink dink and a plink plink plink,
The rain makes my thoughts go plink-it-e wink.
It patters all about with a plink and pat,
I'm gettin' tired just thinkin' bout that!
All rights reserved, © Chuck Johnson. Copying without permission is forbidden.
The delightful experience of a light rain after a period of intense arid conditions. How to describe the feeling?
|Krishnaa on Dec 21, 2003 |
1041 critiques, 54 poems.
You got it absolutely right. A rain on a hot summer day sounds as delightful as you have described. And, if we have hailstones falling on the roofs... Yummy!!
|le Chaton on Dec 21, 2003, 5:51 |
Formerly "SmutKitten" 329 critiques, 49 poems.
Aww I really like this! I could almost hear the raindrops hitting the roof as I read along!
"In a sheet, or a torrent, or a tremendous roar,
The rain courses by, loud as a musical score!"
This is my favorite line - I'm a music lover/long-ago musician and I love this metaphor. Great write!
| genielassie on Dec 29, 2003, 9:44 |
What is the weight of a solitary word? 5350 critiques, 110 poems.
oh my! a tounge twister too!!! this is wonderful and it's one I think I should memorize aswell and put a tune to for my daughter who is having some trouble with her pronunciation of words...this might help her since she talks too fast and that is about 50% of her difficult...lol...She'd have to slow down to copy me in this one...Great write and best of wishes as well...~genielassie~
| cherche -d -ame on Dec 29, 2003, 6:20 p.m. |
you are the owner of your every dream 11093 critiques, 459 poems.
Loved the easy flow of this...no angst , no abuse , no horror...just a rap rap and a tap tap and a pat pat
|Bluestar on Dec 31, 2003, 4:14 |
2087 critiques, 90 poems. said:
A great write here, your onomatopoeia usage in this write really does round the poem off, making the coming of this rain even more exciting.
| Hoosierpoet on Jan 19, 2004, 9:42 p.m. |
Poetry is the music of the heart 1947 critiques, 242 poems.
Verdict: very good
You brought a smile to my face with this little poem, Chuck! I had to read this, because I have always loved the rain so much. This would make a nice read for youngsters on a rainy day. I have written a few poems with whimsical sound effects like this, and I can appreciate your effort in writing this. Very well done!
| AngelSeeker on Jan 29, 2004, 8:46 p.m. |
1274 critiques, 36 poems.
This was an enjoyable little ditty. I agree that children might like the whimisal
|Bethie on Dec 02, 2005, 9:05 p.m. |
I 603 critiques, 41 poems.
This is cute, and well written, made me smile.