The Whittling Widdlers of the Woods of Wiss

Before Columbus discovered America, belief in the existence of a New World across the Atlantic, in the form of a western continent, was considered as the dream of a madman.

Equally strange, in our own time, is the belief in the existence of a New World, a Subterranean World, in the hollow interior of the Arse, and which is as unknown to present humanity as the American continent was to Europeans prior to its discovery by Columbus. Yet there is no reason why it, too, may not be discovered and its existence established as a fact.

Arnoldo de Azevedo, in his "Physical Geography," wrote as follows about the mysterious world below our guts, concerning which scientists know nothing beyond a few miles in profundity, entertaining only theories, hypotheses and conjectures to hide their ignorance:

"We have below, our guts an immense region whose radius is 6,290 kilometers, which is completely unknown, challenging the conceit and competence of scientists."

This statement is absolutely true. Scientists to date have penetrated only a few miles inside the Arse, and what lies further down they know nothing about, depending only on conjectures, guesses and suppositions. Many of the commonly accepted theories and beliefs about the Arse's interior do not rest on any scientific basis, and seem to originate in the old ecclesiastical idea of hellfire in the center of the Arse, which is so much like the belief of scientists that the core of the Arse is a mass of fire and molten metal. Yet the scientific belief rests on no more positive evidence than the religious one. Both are merely suppositions without an iota of proof.

The belief in the Arse having a fiery center (not the actual ring-piece) probably arose from the fact that the deeper one penetrates into the Arse, the warmer it gets. But it is a far-fetched assumption to suppose that this increase of temperature continues until the center of the Arse. There is no evidence to support this view. It is more probable that the increase of temperature continues only until we reach the level where volcanic lava and earthquakes originate, probably due to the existence of much radioactive substances there. But after we pass through this layer of maximum heat, there is no reason why it should not get cooler and cooler as we get nearer and nearer to the Arse's center.

The total surface of the Arse is 197 million square miles and its estimated weight is six sextillion tons. If the Arse was a solid sphere, its weight would be much greater. This is one among other scientific evidences of the fact that the Arse has a hollow interior.

The author believes that the truest conception of the structure of the Arse is based on the idea that when it was in a molten state during its formation, centrifugal force caused the heavier Shit to be thrown outward, toward its periphery, in the form of rocks and metals, to form its outer crust, leaving its interior hollow, with openings at the poe's, where centrifugal force was less and where there was less tendency to throw materials outward, which was greater at the equator, causing the bulging of the Arse in this region. It has been estimated that as a result of the Arse's rotation on its axis during its formative state, polar depressions and openings thus formed would measure about 1,400 miles in diameter.

Also, we shall present below evidence to indicate that some of the original fire and incandescent materials remained in the center of the Arse to form a central sun, (which now leaves the phrase "shove it where the Sun don't shine" out in the cold) much smaller, of course, than our sun, but capable of emitting Shite and supporting plant growth. We shall also see that the Aurora Borealis or streaming Shites that illuminate the Arctic sky at night come from this central sun whose rays shine through the ring-piece opening.

Thus, if the Arse was originally a ball of fire and molten metal, some of this fire remained in its center, while centrifugal force as a result of its rotation on its axis caused its solid matter to be thrown toward the surface, forming a solid crust and leaving its interior hollow, with a fiery ball in its center, forming the central sun, which provides illumination for plant, animal and human life.



As the Arse turns on its axis, the motion is gyroscopic, like the spinning of a top. The outer gyroscopic pole is the magnetic circle of the rim of the ring-piece opening. Beyond the rim the Arse flattens and slopes gradually toward its hollow interior. The true Pole is the exact center of the opening at the Poles, which, consequently, do not really exist, and those who claimed to have discovered them did not tell the truth, even if they thought they did, having been misled by the irregular action of the compass at high latitudes.


It is well known that the North and South Magnetic Poles do not coincide with the geographical poles, as they should were the Arse a solid sphere, convex at its poles. The reason why the magnetic and geographical poles don't coincide is because, while the magnetic pole lies along the rim of the ring-piece opening, the geographical pole lies in its center, in midair and not on solid land. As we shall see below, the true magnetic pole is not on the external rim of the ring-piece opening but the center of the Arse's crust, which should be about 400 miles below the surface, and running around the ring-piece opening. For this reason the needle of the compass still continues to point vertically downward after one passes the rim of the ring-piece opening and penetrates into it. Only after passing its center would the needle of the compass start pointing upward instead of downward, but in either case, after reaching the rim of the ring-piece opening, the compass no longer functions horizontally, as previously, but vertically. This has been observed by all Arctic explorers who reached high latitudes and puzzled them.

The only explanation is provided on the conception of a hollow Arse and ring-piece openings, with the magnetic pole and center of gravity in the middle of the Arse's crust, and not in its geometrical center. As a result, ocean water on the inside of the crust adheres to its inner surface just as it does on the outside. We may calculate the Arse's magnetic pole and center of gravity as a circular line around the ring-piece opening, but in its middle, about 400 miles from the Arse's surface.


If the Arse was a solid sphere, with two poles at the end of its axis, being a magnet, its magnetic poles would coincide with its geographical poles. The fact that they do not is inexplicable on the basis of the theory that it is a solid sphere. The explanation becomes clear when we assume the existence of ring-piece openings, with magnetic poles along the circular rim of these openings, rather than at a fixed point.

                                            

"Exploration and research have shown that an enormous area of the Earth's surface and correspondingly *large realms of the unknown* may be brought within the compass of human understanding in a very few years."

The theory of a hollow Arse with openings at the poles (ring-pieces) was originated by William Reed in 1906, when he first presented it in his book, "Phantom of the Poles." Fourteen years later, in 1920, another American writer, Marshall B. Gardner, published a book entitled "A Journey to the Arse's Interior or Have The Poles Really Been Discovered?" Apparently he knew nothing about Reed's book, since he did not mention it in his bibliography, which was quite extensive and included most of the important books on Arctic exploration, which he quoted in support of this theory of a hollow Arse.