Slap it on the walls,

Slap it on your face,

Slap it on your balls

At your own pace.

Splash it on the ground,

Swim in it for fun,

Pour it on a greyhound,

And paint you dad’s shotgun –

                            PINK!!

Oh colours are good –

Slap them red, tickle ‘em pink,

Pour it on their head,

Tip it down the sink.

Paint smells –

Paint smells bad,

Paint is toxic

And it makes me glad.

Open the window –

                   PAINT!!

Open the door –

                   PAINT!!

Smells the flowers grow –

                   PAINT!!

And get ready to pour –

PAINT PAINT PAINT!!!

The wet paint sign looks quite dry –

It’ s not been painted on…

That must be why.

One day I walked along the telephone cable poking out of the bedroom wall.  It was hard at first but once I'd got used to the width of it I found my self walking fairly stably.  I looked down and noticed that I wasn't on the cable anymore.  In fact I appeared to be walking on nothing except air.  I didn't believe that was possible.  That was when I fell. 

I cut my head open on an old rusty meat cleaver that happened to be in my path.  Then I died.