Hemming Jeans

Posted by Margaret Sleasman on May 17, 2016 at 4:50 PM

Margaret Sleasman·Tuesday, May 17, 2016

     I don’t know why I dislike hemming jeans; it takes all of 5 minutes, but I put it off as long as possible. An example would be the latest fiasco - Hubby has been after me for several months to hem his new jeans. I think I bought them in November and they have been just sitting around waiting to be cut upon. Finally, after Hubby’s continued nagging, I washed them in hot water and dried them in the dryer so that if there is any shrinking, it would be taken care of before hemming.

They sat for another month (I think until this past March), he put the pants on and wanted me to measure where to cut them. OK, a man with no feeling in one foot is going to climb onto a chair and stand there while a half-blind woman tries to poke pins into the jeans; not an ideal situation, but we managed. No bad incidents since we only have to do one leg because I measure the second leg with the first.

The jeans go back on the chair, it is late April, “I wish you would hem my pants, you never know when the ones I have on are going to tear - PEOPLE HAVE MORE THAN ONE CHANGE OF CLOTHES YOU KNOW!” “You have three more pairs of jeans in your drawer and a full closet of clothes, so you are hardly someone with one outfit.” “Do ANY of those clothes fit me?” I am guessing, probably not many, but say, “Sure they do; are you going somewhere that you need to wear a new pair of jeans, or am I just hemming them to put them in the drawer until you grow out of them?” “SILENCE...”

I was thinking that I would rather mow the lawn, but today he is out doing something on his tractor. A surprise is in order; I quickly hemmed the jeans and put them back on the chair (of course this is the middle of May so he has probably already out-grown them). The next time he asks me to hem them, I can say, “They have been done for awhile now.” Of course that could mean 15 minutes from now or in three months, it is up to him now.

The thing I am wondering about is this time, I only cut two inches off the bottom of the jeans instead of the usual four - did he grow or did China change the size measurements again? I probably measured wrong and they will puddle up on his shoes much like the Disney Dopey’s baggy clothes. I will say, “I guess you must have shrank a couple inches since we measured...” and he will freak out and make me cut and hem again; the good news is that I will have another six months to take care of that request.

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