I didn't want this to be about weight. I am so much more than how much my body weighs. But, the reality is, much of my life has revolved around my size, fighting nature by struggling to be something I'm not. It has taken me nearly my whole lifetime to feel comfortable in my own skin regardless of how much padding there is beneath it. My body has served me well regardless of it's size on any given day. It has enabled me to accomplish everything I ever wanted to do. It has produced two handsome sons. It has brought me pleasure as well as pain.
It has taught me to feel compassion for others that don't fit into society's current idea of what is acceptable. It has given me strength by having to overcome weight bigotry. It has given me the desire to excel in whatever I do in an attempt to disprove any stereotype that large people are lazy or underachievers. It has made me conscious of being meticulously groomed at all times and to always present myself in the best possible manner.
I realize that I will not be able to please everyone no matter what my weight. But now that doesn't matter as it once did. As a child I was painfully shy as a result of teasing by other children. At home I was put on diets and then ridiculed when they failed. I could not concentrate on my studies and just wanted to run away and hide. Yes, I have been more favorably received by some when I was a smaller size, but why should that be? As long as I am healthy, happy, confident and competent, why should it matter? Some women destroy their health by taking diet pills, smoking, fasting, purging, and even undergo dangerous surgeries to promote slimness. I have come to accept myself as a worthwhile human being regardless of the numbers on the scale. I am no longer shy. I am outgoing and friendly, I feel at ease in any situation, business or social. I make no apologies for being who I am.
I never knew why I was overweight. I ate no more than anyone else and got plenty of exercise. I would starve myself to try to look like the other girls. The problem was as soon as I would eat normally again I would gain. I have no lack of will power. I have a library of every diet and exercise book ever written.I can tell you the nutritional content of every conceivable food item. I have put myself through deprivation that no one should have to endure. I am convinced that I am biologically programmed to be big or there is something that medical science has not discovered about losing weight and keeping it off.
I know some people eat more than they should and gain weight as a result. But I am not one of those people. I have always eaten healthy foods, normal portions, but maintain a high weight doing so. To be slim I have to cut back to practically nothing and be hungry all the time.
For other family members who struggle with the same issues, you are not alone. Strive to be the best you can be. Take care of yourself and love yourself no matter what. For some of us our weight isn't a choice, it is a genetic fact. I do not mean to discourage anyone from doing what is best for themselves. If you can lose weight through conventional ways, then by all means do so if that is what you want. Do not use my story as a cop out. I guess my message is this, don't put your life on hold waiting for the magical day when you will be thin. Carpe Diem.
I think there are supposed to be fat people, thin people, tall people,short people, black people, white people, etc. That's what makes us interesting. Regardless of my weight I am still me.
Now that all that is out of the way, let's get on with the real story of my life." It was a dark and stormy night at the Daisy Hill Puppy Farm."..oh, sorry wrong story.
I was born on March 16th in Buffalo NY to John Wesley Kuntz and the former Virginia Blanchard. I was one of three kids with a sister Ginny and a brother Jack. My dad passed away when I was about 7 years old and my mother and sister and I went to live with my mothers parents in Coral Gables,Florida.
When I was a teenager, I was married to my first husband Nelson Alvarez. We had one child John "Wesley" Alvarez. Nelson was killed at work when we had been married less than a year. Two years later I married a man named Irving J. Armstrong,Jr. That marriage resulted in one son named Christopher Elliot Armstrong and lasted many years. During our marriage, I was fortunate to mostly be a "stay at home mom" and be able to pursue my interests in art and interior design as well as many volunteer opportunities. However, when there were lean times I worked to supplement my husbands income.
I went to college and studied Interior Design in the 1980's and '90's. I started my own Art and Interior Decor Business in 1989. I have done the interior decor of many residential and commercial buildings, including historic landmarks.
My art work is on display in many galleries, public buildings and online in many virtual galleries.
Throughout my life to earn money, I have sold real estate, managed a tanning salon, taught aerobics, worked as a floral designer,an accounts payable rep , sold ladies clothing, was the hostess in an Elk's club, worked in a furniture store(where I met one of my best friends, Kay Hopkins), was custom design rep for a major department store(driving all over the state ), managed a futon store, sold and demonstrated exercise equipment, worked as the assistant to the Interior Design Department head at a college , worked as a tutor for Sterling Tutors, worked for a couple of prominent Winter Park Interior Designers and have done free lance modeling, given seminars for displaced home makers and plus size women. I have designed and sold my own line of plus size fashions, including jewelry. I have also taught classes in my original art technique as well as the making of mosaics. I even had my own catering business, briefly. I still like to do that for friends and family. I would dearly love to have my own bed and breakfast. I am still working on that one.
I have been a member and volunteer of the Orlando Opera Guild, The Symphony League, The Orlando Museum of Art, Additions, School volunteers, Cub Scout Leader, PTA President, Little League Mother, President of Student Chapter of ASID( American Society of Interior Designers). I have worked on many Designer Show Houses , Street of Dreams, Festival of Trees, Parade of Homes and been involved in many art shows too numerous to mention.I have raised funds for The Mustard Seed, Women in the Arts , an Ecological group,The American Heart Association,The American Cancer Society and St. Jude's Research Hospital for Children. I was on the advisory board of Southern College.
First and foremost, I love my family and pets.I love cooking and entertaining. I love kids. I am wild about holidays. I love to shop for antiques. I love the beach and being near water. I have lived in a house on a lake for most of my adult life. I have become a computer addict. I love photography and art in most any form.I love reading and writing poetry, fiction and non fiction. I love drawing cartoons. I have taken acting classes.I love to dance. I enjoy working in my garden. I like to think I have a good sense of humor.(It's hard not to coming from my family) I make tile mosiacs and pictorial collages of fabric and other found objects I love to sew and make quilts. I love music, classical ,classic rock, gospel,(Mahalia Jackson brings tears to my eyes) even some country and jazz. I try to live my life based on a twelve step program as a guide. I find all the answers to life's dilemmas there.
I can not think of anything I would change about my life. When I look back I can see that things made sense even though I couldn't see it at the time.I had a wonderful family starting out and I have a wonderful family now. I don't like to see my loved ones go though hardships when there is nothing I can do to help them. I just have to trust that the universe is unfolding as it should. Although I am not religious, I have a deep spiritual faith that sustains me.
I have a cool husband, Walter, who makes my life complete. My sons and my two grandaughters Tammy and Andrea Maxwell are a big part of my life. Not to forget my pals Brooks and Otto in Miami who are always there for me. My dear buddy Kay in Poplar Bluff, and Jack and Misty, I love you guys.
I continue to work in my Art and Interior Decor business: VXA Art & Interiors in Orlando, FL, www. valeriexarmstrong.com
There is a lot more stuff I could add but I don't want to bore anyone further so I'll call it quits.
Later.
VXA
Post Script: It saddens me to add that Walter Malec, my beloved husband, passed away on May 5, 2008..He will always live in my heart.
You may email me at vxarmstrong@gmail.com
Please visit other family websites listed at bottom of this page.
Links to other family websites please don't forget to sign guestbooks:
http://www.freewebs.com/johnwesleykuntz/index.htm
http://www.freewebs.com/walterdeanmalec/
http://www.freewebs.com/jackblanchardandmistymorgan/index.htm
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