|Posted by Ally Tucker on April 30, 2012 at 10:30 PM||comments (3)|
Remember us? We have taken a hiatus from Tucker's Tales for the past few months due to a new gig with KSR College. The time has come though to kick start Tucker's Tales once again with the addition of some fresh blood. Our 2012 recruiting class includes two of the top blogging prospects in the country county.
TARA BILBY 5'7, 5'8, 5'9? pretty tall Berea, Ky
Tara Bilby first caught the eye of the Tucker's Tales recruiting gurus with her clever/witty work on KSR College. Bilby was actually very pro-active in her recruitment though, reaching out to Tucker's Tales a few weeks ago to proclaim her interest in the position. Though Bilby has verbally committed to Tucker's Tales, we are still waiting on her to fax her letter of intent.
Strengths: Impeccable 3-goggle form, knows when to bold em' and when to fold em' in her blog entries, fromances on Twitter, knows every word to the song "The Motto," group texting, white blazers, typing 10 page papers in backseats on the way to New Orleans, her grandma and grandpa etc.
Weaknesses: Low volume on podcasts, cordial interaction with Mississippi State fans, guys with fatheads, doesn't believe that Rose did anything wrong by not giving a more valiant effort to let Jack share the door with her at the end of Titanic, inability to accept Twitter After Dark, GPS devices, lack of knowledge of Simon Birch, finger piercings, etc.
HAYLEY MINOGUE 5'7, 5'8, 5'9? Damn, she's pretty tall too... Doesn't Exist, Ky
Hayley Minogue, like Bilby, also first caught the attention of Tucker's Tales while blogging for KSR College. Hayley has a quirky sense of humor, cleverly sprinkled with the occasional hashtag. Hayley is still a bit reluctant to pull the trigger and make her commitment to Tucker's Tales. She will decide tomorrow via Twitter, probably after school. Expect Head Coach Ally Tucker and Assistant Coach Kristen Geil to put on the full court press with the recruitment process tonight. We will likely exceed the legal number of alloted text messages allowed in the recruiting process. Screw you, NCAA Freewebs.com. We don't care about your rules.
Strengths: Loyalty to the Big Mac, emojies, tested negative for #L1C4, Twitter, her Boyfriend, her other boyfriend Elroy, her other boyfriend Brad, her other boyfriend Nerlens, Dizzy Bat, ability to creepily lurk in the background of Wilder Eyes pictures, stomps the yard, etc.
Weaknesses: Volunteers to make t-shirts but never follows through, casting calls, Twitter, dates a Louisville fan, confusing e-mail address, doesn't know who Rebecca Lobo is, use of caller ID, starts Twitter wars with U of L fans, shares a last name with Kylie Minogue, etc.
Tucker's Tales Final Thoughts on the Bilby/Minogue Package: Both writers would be fine additions to the Tucker's Tales Staff. They have already proven themselves to be reliable bloggers, while also being two of the funniest/most clever/wittiest girls I've ever met. They have a knack for when to tweet, when to retweet and when to eat meat (never for Tara, after 2 a.m. for Hayley). Tara is also the only writer to ever have her post directly referenced to me by Stone Cold Willow.
In all honesty, I have gotten to know these two girls through the KSR College #LaFamilia over the course of the past few months and my life has been better every day since. They are both a constant source of entertainment, hard work and friendship. I am pleased to announce that both will be interning here for us on TuckersTales.net. Please join me in giving them a warm welcome.
P.s. Tara and Hayley, you might want to add "TT" to the end of your twitter handles. Just sayin'...
|Posted by Ally Tucker on January 13, 2012 at 10:20 AM||comments (3)|
|Posted by Ally Tucker on January 10, 2012 at 8:35 PM||comments (1)|
Oh U(r)sher, no need to be shy or pensive. We've been here before. Next to my diary (oh wait, that's Kristen), you are the one who knows the most about me. We've been through a lot, Ush. Maybe not as much as you and Chili, but in lieu of how things turned out between the two of you-- I'd like to think you feel closer to me than her.
Anyway, it's been a while but I think the time has come for another late night confession. I've got to be honest Ush, I'm more nervous about this confession than any before. I fear that you will pass judgment on me as a human being. With that said, if I can't tell you, than who can I tell?
Before anyone passes judgment, in my defense, I was only about 3 years old. Can any of us be held responsible for the things we did at the age of 3? If that were the case, I think it's fair to say we could all have reason to hate Suri Cruise for life for some of the ridiculous outfits she had worn by the age of 3.
I digress. Before I go any further, let me just say this now: Sarah MacLachlan, I am so, so, so sorry....
I'm not sure exactly where the appropriate place to start this confession is, but I feel the need to provide an ounce of background information on my family's history with pets. Actually, I really just need to tell you about one particular event in our family's history of pets. Before I confess, let me confess something about my older sister Colleen. When she was about 3 years old (see a pattern here?), she and my parents found two box turtles somewhere in the mystic wild (probably a pond, let's be honest). For reasons I'm unsure of, they decided that keeping these turtles as pets would be a good idea.
Some time shortly after the adoption of the two turtles into the family, my sister began a secret nightly routine that no one (my parents, who else does a 3 year old know?) knew about but her. Every night before going to bed, she would kiss the turtles goodnight. Box turtles are not known for being good kissers, but apparently they are known for carrying Salmonella.
Poor little Colleen nearly died she became so sick (glad you made it sis!) from the Salmonella. And as an apparent lasting side effect from the illness, she has an aversion to milk. Fun fact! You're welcome, readers.
Anyway, fast forward 3 years to my confession.
When I was 3 years old, I was an accomplice pretty damn active participant in a serious crime against animals. I'm not proud. Oh no, I am not proud. But I like to be truthful with Usher and my readers.
When I was 3 and my sister was probably 5 1/2, my parents decided it was time to try another pet after the whole turtle fiasco. They bought us two gerbils.
Those gerbils look innocent and sweet, happy to be snuggling together. Our 2 gerbils must have tired of the snuggling because within a few short weeks, they were expecting!
My memory is vague, so I don't remember how long it was before our 2 gerbils brought Ivy Blue and the rest of the gerbil brood into the world, but soon enough--they had arrived!
Baby gerbils are cute. Baby gerbils are fragile. I repeat, baby gerbils are fragile.
My parents, clearly remembering my sister's run in with the turtles, made it very clear to both of us that we were NOT TO TOUCH THE GERBILS! This message was sent very directly and very clearly to the both of us. We were not allowed to even open the cage. My parents were as serious about this rule as they could be. They explained to us that the gerbils were too fragile for us to play with until they grew older and stronger. We understood.
But you know what else we understood? That for approximately 10 minutes every morning, my Mom was busy in the kitchen making us breakfast. We had exactly 10 minutes to sneak around in the living room and play with the baby gerbils without her really noticing. So what did we do? We played with the baby gerbils for 10 minutes in the morning, doing our best to convince my Mom that she had no reason to look in the living room to monitor us. I honestly don't know how we got away with it.
One morning...shit got real.
Did I mention that I'm really, really sorry, Sarah MacLachlan?
Honest to goodness, my sister and I were just trying to play with the baby gerbils. They were so stinking cute after all. And the fact that we were banned from playing with them only made us want to do it that much more! We were 3 and 5! We didn't know. We didn't know!!!
Baby gerbils are fragile. Very, very fragile.
One of us picked one up by the middle and...well... let's just say we accidentally squeezed a little too hard. It was a tragic accident. I'm not sure that we were aware of what we had done though. We continued to play with the other gerbils, assuming that one was just lethargic.
My memory is a little vague but we were either trying to play catch with one or...well hell, I don't know why else we would have been throwing gerbils. Anyway, we missed the target on one and it flew over onto the corner of the rocking chair bottom. Ivy Blue, as I like to think she was named, was split down the middle.
Sometime minutes before the "Gerbil catch incident of '89," I had thought it would be a funny trick to put one of the gerbils in my Dad's shoe. How I didn't realize that this would end badly for the gerbil, and nauseating for my Dad, I will never know. I was 3!
Anyway, after the gerbil hit the rocking chair...reality began to set in and we realized that we had accidentally and tragically killed one of our baby gerbils. We were a mixture of sad and embarrassed. We weren't sure what to do and we certainly did not want to get caught.
Obviously it didn't take my parents very long to realize that some of the baby gerbils were missing from the cage. And when my Dad stepped on the one in his penny loafers (makes for a better story, yeah?), a moment I can only imagine he has tried to erase from his memory (sorry Dad!), the true damage had come to light.
I cannot stress to you enough how innocent in nature the whole morning was. Regardless of intent, we Jeffrey Dahmer-ed a handful of baby gerbils.
I am not sure I will ever be able to make amends for that tragic day, but I had to get it off my chest. RIP baby gerbils. Someday I will dedicate a book to you. No, seriously...I will.
And again, Sarah MacClachlan...please believe me when I say that I am sorry. The experience from all those years ago certainly doesn't make your commercial any easier to stomach...
** TUCKER'S TALES Spoiler Alert .... Our good friend Richmond has started a project where he produces podcasts. The Tucker's Tales duo of Kristen & Ally will be his first production. We will be recording a podcast in which we discuss all kinds of things (Tucker's Tales, our recent hiring on the KSR College staff, etc). We are recording this weekend and the podcast should be available soon after on Tucker's Tales for you to check it out. If it's any good, maybe we will do it on a regular basis. If it's terrible....we'll throw it in the pile of mistakes along with Celebrity Survivor.
|Posted by Ally Tucker on January 8, 2012 at 1:20 PM||comments (0)|
|Posted by Ally Tucker on January 5, 2012 at 4:20 PM||comments (5)|
|Posted by Ally Tucker on January 2, 2012 at 12:55 AM||comments (0)|
--> Find out why my sister calls me Lettuce (Background: Before I was born, my sister wanted my parents to name me "Lettuce." Instead of accepting that they in fact did not name me Lettuce, she refused to call me by any other name for years. Ironically, I now hate salad. Coincidence? I think not!)
|Posted by Ally Tucker on January 1, 2012 at 10:40 PM||comments (1)|
|Posted by Ally Tucker on January 1, 2012 at 2:35 PM||comments (0)|
On January 2nd, 2011 at 4:21 p.m.....a new baby was born....probably in a hospital somewhere in the United States....to a joyful mother and father.
On January 2nd, 2011 at 4:21 p.m....a new blog was born...definitely in a small apartment room at "The Lex"... ...to a joyful pair of pals, Ally and Kristen.
I know I've probably told this story on here before, but a random text message from Kristen sent to me a few months before the whole blog actually came to fruition, was the culprit for this whole thing. Kristen sent me a message that said something to the effect of:
"I like your Facebook statuses. If you ever had a blog, I'd read it."
The wheels began to turn at that moment, though I'm not even really sure how aware I was of the fact that it was happening. I began to get a little antsy around new year's of last year and decided that I wanted to start a new project. Suddenly, the text message's message (how's that for a tongue-twister?) came back to me and I began searching the internet for free blog host websites.
My initial thought, considering my obsession with sports and lifelong dream of someday writing for KentuckySportsRadio.com, was that the blog would mainly center around me writing about sports. I even tried to pick what I thought was a "sporty looking" backdrop for the blog. If I had to guess, probably very few of you even remember the initial lay-out for this blog. It was some psychodelic-looking blue and black lightening strike-looking thing. The layout was hideous and thank God a few people made playful comments and urged me to change it.
Since then, the format and layout have not really changed at all. But the content has certainly been as random as can be. We have not written solely about sports. We have written about just about anything you could probably imagine. (And even things you could not imagine, such as "Celebrity Survivor" and having a "Life Draft"--- my bad guys on never finishing those....what was I thinking???)
The little project of this blog started out as a fun idea that I honestly thought would mostly consist of me writing things that only I would read, and maybe my parents and Kristen just because she felt bad. Little did I know that not only would Kristen become a HUGE part of the blog with her hilarious and impressive writing skills, but also that people would actually read it.
I remember being excited the first time that we hit 100 views. It was early on too, maybe within a day or two if I remember correctly. A few retweets later from our MVP, Mary Jo Perino, and we were steadily bringing in around 100 viewers a day. Since then things have fluctuated for a variety of reasons. Sometimes we get an absurd amount of hits (you would laugh at the different Google searches that people use that somehow bring them to our website) and sometimes both of us are so busy that we don't blog quite as often. Regardless, the fact that so many of you all have taken the time to read our blog, come back to read more of our blog, share it with your friends and family, and genuinely support us in our crazy little adventure is something that we are forever grateful for-- THANK YOU!
In our 1 year of existence we have had a grand total of 24,755 views:
Now for a little treat on this 1 year anniversary (don't worry, we are celebrating over a fancy dinner tonight--and by that I mean Kristen will cook a really fancy dinner and send me a picture of it), we would like to re-visit some of our favorite blog entries from the past year.
We have gone back through every single entry (someday we will figure out a way to make doing this easier on the blog) and I have selected what I think are Kristen's TEN BEST BLOG ENTRIES. Kristen has gone back and selected what she thinks are MY BEST TEN BLOG ENTRIES. Simply click on the links provided to go back and read some of our favorites (also keep in mind that some of the pictures that we used along the way have since disappeared...probably copyright bull-jive)
Enjoy....oh, and also...be grateful that since the VERY FIRST BLOG ENTRY, we have learned that adding pictures makes things so much better. Shoutout to Google Images. Thanks, bro.
Ally's Picks for Kristen's 10 Best Blog Entries of 2011 (in no particular order):
**possibilities....have to finalize still
-Kristen started her Tucker's Tales blogging career off with a bang. As soon as I read this entry, I not only laughed out loud (LOL-ed if you will) but I knew that she was going to become a major contributor, far beyond simply a "guest blogger."
-Perhaps my favorite line ever in any of Kristen's many melodramatic and absurd diary entries. "I got an angel! Bye!"
- I think that Kristen has far more "practical" and "useful" blog entries than I do. This is one of her best when it comes to actually informing readers about something important, which in this case revolves around her knowledge and love for Lexington.
- One of the more "so ridiculous that it can't be true, but it's true" stories I've ever heard. Kristen details her audition with her good friend Layson for the television hit show "The Amazing Race"
-Kristen rode a mechanical bull on spring break, among other things.
- Kristen combines her love with Twitter and her trip to Peru. Genius.
- Some of the pictures Kristen found of people "planking" are hilarious. Not to mention that this particular blog entry has accounted for probably 50% of our blog site traffic. When you google or google image the word "planking," Kristen's article is one of the first hits. #BlogSoHard
8 ) Living the Dream
-Kristen makes a list of her dream jobs. Some are obvious choices, some... not so much.
-This is one of my favorite blog entries that Kristen has ever written. I had a giggle fit through the entire thing. Kristen outlines what she would do for tickets to the UK/UNC game.
-Kristen included nearly a page of dialogue directly from the television show "Boy Meets World." I cried just reading it. Enough said.
Kristen's Picks for Ally's 10 Best Blog Entries of 2011 (in no particular order):
Spot on. Just spot on.
I still LOL thinking about this time in Ally's life.
- CHASE NO FACE >>>>>>>. And Ally's photo captions are genius.
- I love lists.
- Ally was on top of the Hunger Games way before the bandwagon started. AND Twitter. Props.
- UK vs Transy is a game that needs to happen every year. Bonus points for referencing Becky the Icebox.
- Oh hey, remember when the World Cup happened this summer and it was AWESOME?? Ally does.
- Although all karaoke entries could be on this list, I chose this one because I wasn't there and that is one of my greatest regrets in life.
- Maybe I cried reading this. Maybe I didn't. You'll never know.
- One of my top five nights of 2011 by far, and Ally completely did it justice in the blog entry.
*** We couldn't forget our favorite guest bloggers. Guest bloggers have been a wonderful bonus for our blog. We have had all kinds of wonderful contributions throughout the year. We have found that all kinds of people have a gift when it comes to writing and/or sharing stories. We hope to continue to allow a place for people to come and share their stuff. It was hard to pick just 5 favorites, but we tried to display a variety.
5 GUEST BLOG ENTRIES WE LOVED:
-She honestly almost had me relating to the Jersey Shore gang.
2) "Your Parents Hate You: Ridiculous Names Vol. 1" by Brandon Daulton
-Brandon is really passionate about ridiculous childhood names. I hope that he marries a woman who insists on naming their child "LaTiffany" or something of the sort.
3) "In the Spirit of Lent" by Meg Phillips
- Meg brought it hard and we love her for it. She went ham on all kinds of people/things.
4) "Becoming a Karaoke Regular" by Colleen Tucker
- Considering how many karaoke entries we had, I figured my sister's entry about the guidelines for being a karaoke regular seemed appropriate.
5) "Short Hair, Don't Care" by Cole Adams
-If I'm being honest, this might be one of my favorite blog entries we've ever had-- not just guest blog entries either. Cole nailed her tribute to the US Women's National Team coach Pia Sunhage.
|Posted by Ally Tucker on December 22, 2011 at 7:20 PM||comments (0)|
Happy Holidays everyone! To say the least, 2011 has been eventful & exciting in our La Familia here at the University of Kentucky. We have had some significant changes in our lives this year, saying goodbye to some of our family members while also welcoming in some new family members as well.
We had a very difficult pregnancy with little Marquis. He almost didn't make it. Sure enough though, when the stork dropped him off on our doorstep instead of the doorstep of Porcini's, we were very excited to see our new little bundle of joy.
Marquis is currently experiencing some of the pains that come with teething, but he is slowly but surely turning the corner and making us proud parents instead of causing us to lose sleep and want to rip our hair out after each
turnover contested 3-pointer incoming tooth.
One of our other new family members, worried us a bit before he arrived as well. When we got the ultra-sound pictures we quickly panicked as any young parents would when we only saw one eyebrow instead of two. The doctors assured us that this was not a critical issue in his development moving forward. He has really excelled since coming home. He loves all of his toys but he has shown a preference for blocks. All little Anthony Davis does all day: blocks, blocks, blocks. He also enjoys playing with his brothers, but they get angry because everytime they try to hand him one of their toys to share with him, he promptly swats it in the other direction. We are sure that he will learn to share in time. He could stand to gain a little bit of weight too...
We have included a picture of baby Anthony's ultrasound!
People keep asking us if little Kyle came from the Milk Man, seeing as he really doesn't resemble anyone else in our family. Kyle worries at times, but we tell him that if anyone gives him any trouble or picks on him for being different, he just needs to learn to
defend himself DEFEND. Point. Blank. End. Of. Story.
Another one of our boys, little Doron, seemed to be having some issues with his vision in school. We finally got him to the eye doctor and they were able to fit him with a pair of glasses with a special prescription lense...
You would be amazed at how much better he can see now! He doesn't even have to wear both lenses anymore!
We took a family vacation a few weeks ago in Uncasville, Connecticut. They had a great casino there! The company wasn't the greatest, but the boys did come back with a little souvenir.
Our boy Enes finally got out of jail after a year!
We wanted to take a moment to personally thank all of our closest friends, church and family for all of the continuing support you gave him during his imprisonment. We will never forget you guys! #LaFamilia
Little Brandon made the honor roll.....AGAIN.
If everyone could just take a quick break from reading the rest of this letter for a minute to pray for our Uncle Chuck. He has fallen a bit ill recently and needs all of your prayers and strength. We heard that he is making a quick recovery, but still...we wish him a year of perfect health!
We had a family reunion this summer. What a blast it was to have everyone back in the same room, sharing stories, swapping trading cards and giving each other shout outs on Twitter. Funny enough, we had like 3 or 4 more reunions just a few weeks later as well. We will probably have another one next summer...hell, maybe we'll have 6 or 7. It was great to have all the guys back around so much...
Speaking of family....Grandma's still got it...
Shhhh....don't tell anyone but little Mikey is our favorite child. He is just perfect in every single way. Honestly, he can do no wrong. We love his every move. He has even been lending a hand to La Familia by getting the other kids up for breakfast every morning and making sure they get fed. He calls it the "Breakfast Club." Such a little angel, that Michael!
Our pride and joy last year, little Joshua, has moved on to take a new job in the Big Apple of all places! The last we heard from him, he was in talks with an agent to have his own reality tv show titled "Fountain of Fun." We don't get much mail from him, but occasionally we still receive mail FOR him. Last March, for example, Jared Sullinger sent him a letter. The only thing enclosed in the envelope was his dignity.
Oh, and we can't leave out the family pet...our little centaur, Eloy. Eloy has really been making major strides in his coordination, even picking up a few new tricks since last year. We find that this year we don't have to yell "NOOOOOOO!" quite so much at him.
All in all, 2011 has been a great year for us here at the Univeristy of Kentucky. We hope that 2011 has been just as great for the rest of the #BBN. Please remember to enjoy the ride, check out my website CoachCal.Com, try a cup of the holiday flavors at Orange Leaf and Bounce Back from any of your shortcomings!
P.s. Pray for sweet Terrence. He has lost his way. And apparently his chin as well.
|Posted by Ally Tucker on December 16, 2011 at 6:55 AM||comments (0)|