Click here to go to BOOK TWO.
Genesis
In the beginning...
BOOK ONE: The End Of The World (As We Know It)
Sarcasm, loneliness, and rock music...in outer space!
001: The World At Large
Walt decides to do something about his depressing existence.
002: Something Close To Social
Walt starts making friends... the hard way.
003: A Little Dream Of Me
A flashback to a vexing dream of Walt's.
004: Less Talk, More Rawk
Lloyd and Walt's musical talents are utilized.
005: One Sweet Ride
The band's touring vehicle is found to be... less than cutting-edge.
006: Kinda Like Summer Camp, Only No Bugs Or Vomiting
Bedding issues arise.
007: Not A Morning Person
Life in space actually kind of sucks.
008: An Informal Reception
Getting into AV headquarters proves difficult.
009: Now That's What I Call Character Development
Dextrose's true identity is revealed.
010: Office Space
All is not well in the world of Allied Vectors.
BOOK ZERO POINT FIVE: Playing House
A bit of background. Plus: How to steal from a major Vegas casino.
011: Awfully Funny
Partners...in SCIENCE!
012: The Most Important Part
Naming the band takes more effort than you'd imagine.
013: Meanwhile, Somewhere Serious...
The entire deep-space travel business is placed in jeopardy.
014: Career Opportunities
Dexy's line of work is more interesting than anyone expected.
015: Practice
Making perfect.
016: The First Gig
The band plays at a venue that isn't exactly welcoming.
017: A Change Of Plans
Lloyd knows what deep-space truckers like.
018: Trouble Brewing
Another band shows up and... complicates things somewhat.
019: A Little Fender Bender
Marooned on a distant planet! Whoooooo!
020: Meet The Press
An isolated planet panics when aliens make contact.
021: The Inner Sanctum
Behold: the Chosen One!
022: Confessions, Challenges
The road to death is paved with things you regret saying.
023: The Final Showdown
The big-budget climax.
024: Small Universe, I Guess
Walt unexpectedly comes across an old friend.
025: But What About Them Purple Guys?
There's quite a hole in that which is thought holy...
026: On The Road Again
Awwww GLITTAR!
027: Future Tense
Insecurity loves company.
028: Surprise, Surprise
Scandal! Terror! Puke stains!
029: Aaaaand... Awkward!
It's always hard to say goodbye. Except in this case.
030: Burn, Baby, Burn
When these people like something, they tend to stick with it.
031: Fancy Dress
Walt narrowly avoids falling into an over-used plot device.
032: Freak Out
Pent-up frustration all up in the club.
033: Frightening, Isn't It?
Don't you just hate Halloween specials?
034: Can We Play Here?
Lookin' for work in all the wrong places.
035: Needing No Introduction
And now for something completely... you know. Python reference.
036: Beckoning the Thaw
And now we ride this circus wheel...
037: Ripped From The Headlines
The Croutons gain popularity.
038: Burning Down The House
Sometimes change is for the worse...
039: Their Total Request Is Arson Daily
We are frightened of our fans.
040: Now Is The Winter Of Our Discontent
Happy Holidays®!
041: Hello Hello Hello Sir
Casual introductions lead to terrible revelations.
042: Searchin' For An Answer
Walt makes a tough decision.
043: Fire In The Streets
This whiskey priest, he burned his church to keep his girls alive...
044: That There's An Allen Wrench
The Croutons need to get rich quick.
045: A Very Nearly Late Registration
Despite video's best efforts, the radio star survives.
046: Of Glitter And Grief
Walt runs into an old friend. Well, he's sort of a friend.
047: Showtime
The 28th Annual Pan-Cosmic Battle of the Bands kicks off.
PCBOTB ENTRIES:
The Ninja Verses
The Darksteel Dragons
... (pronounced Dot Dot Dot)
Norbert's Eye
Wintergreen
048: We're Not Gonna Make It
Kick out the jams, motherf**kers!
049: Early Celebration
There are winners. And then... there are losers.
050: Don't Tell Me You Expected A Happy Ending
However, the Croutons are even sorer losers than most.
051: Time Management
Forgotten commitments rear their ugly head.
052: Short Order
A rendezvous with two familiar faces.
053: Metaphysics On A Napkin
...or, Time Travel For The Desperate.
054: The Next Morning...
Things become oddly repetitive for Walt.
054: The Next Morning...
Things become oddly repetitive for Walt.
054: The Next Morning...
Things become oddly repetitive for Walt.
054: The Next Morning...
Things become oddly repetitive for Walt.
054: The Next Morning...
Things become oddly repetitive for Walt.
054: The Next Morning...
Things become oddly repetitive for Walt.
055: Out Of Time
The Midnight Run experiences trouble in transit.
056: Rules of Engagement
Wanna know a secret? Giant robots actually kind of suck.
057: We're Not Gonna Take It
Lasers! LAAAAASERRRRS!!!
058: Armed and Dangerous
The Croutons equip themselves with "protection".
059: Hidden Talents
Lloyd may not be as boring as you'd suspect him to be.
060: Crawlspace
Real life rarely turns out like it does in the movies.
061: Insecure
The Bellanova compound has been breached!
062: Probably Quantum Or Something
Guess what, kids? It's time for another needlessly lengthy science lecture!
063: Emergency Exit
Leaving the Bellanova compound proves to be surprisingly straightforward.
064: Which Way The Pressure Lies
Theft, treason, and a good old-fashioned Mexican standoff.
065: We'll All Float On Okay
BOOK TWO: When The Levee Breaks
066: Inexplicable Forces
067: The Worst Part Of Waking Up
068: Dead Fish Handshake
069: Lost in the Woods
070: Footprints
071: Liftoff
072: Autopsy
073: Welcome To Shady Grove
074: We Come In Pieces
075: The Interstellar Con
076: Two Guys Walk Into A Bar...
077: For The Good Of The Community
078: Amnesiacs
079: Funeral No. 1
080: Unfriendly Fire
081: Here Comes The Whale
082: Holes
083: Living On Autopilot
084: The Welcome Wagon
085: Let's Get This Over With
086: Loose Strings
087: With A Capital T
088: Counterpoint
089: Foreign Affairs
090: Reprecussions
091: Sandwich Emergency
092: The Cold Bite Of Steel
THE TRY EVERYTHING ONCE TWO YEARS AND (almost) TWO HUNDRED PAGES SUPER EXTREME GUEST COMIC PARTYGANZABRATION AND STUFF:
093: Internal Combustion
094: Funeral No. 2
095: Speech
096: Debate
097: Deeper Secrets
098: Things Get Weirder
099: All Tied Up
100: Revolution
101: Vanadian Gothic
102: Behind Closed Doors
103: Trouble Brewing
104: Ears, Eyes and Arms
105: Onomatopoeia
106: Negotiations
107: Preparations
108: Sinister Goings-On
109: Mystery Threat
110: From One Maniac To Another
111: Corporate Casual
112: Big Yellow Cab
Walt makes his decision...
The Flaming Croutons find themselves seperated and adrift... yet they still attract trouble like magnets.
The kingdom of Vanadia is visited by something a little out of the ordinary.
Walt freaks out and kills a guy. Really!
You can be my bodyguard, I can be your long-lost pal...
Alastair muses on the price of artistic expression.
Dextrose is lost in the desert.
Hot air balloon. Hot air balloon.
Dexy's new friend is employed in an unusual family business.
Lloyd is stuck in a delightful California suburb.
Terror comes from beyond the stars! (Now in Stere-O-Rama)
"Daxtara" is not exactly the ruthless invader she made herself out to be.
Al returns to his previous place of employment.
A new public works project spells trouble for the town of Boroughdale.
Walt does not suffer mind control easily.
Dexy and Thirteen oversee a burial.
A pair of unwelcome guests arrive...
The local warlord meets his match. And his maker.
A botched capture attempt, a black shovel, and yet another stupid-looking costume.
Betty explains her motives.
The invasion isn't drawing all that much attention.
Lloyd discovers that Shady Grove's mayor is strangely absent.
The patrons of the Broken Wheel tavern have an extremely selective taste.
Political rhetoric works better when hidden within songs, Walt...
The people of Boroughdale are not so easily convinced.
Al has had enough.
Walt and Al find themselves in far deeper trouble.
Dexy finds herself under attack.
Never bring a spatula to a knife fight.
Allan Clarke
EJB
Patrick Kavanaugh
E. "Mazoo" Walburg: One Two Three
Dot Warner
SPECIAL - Behind The Scenes At TEO
Too late.
Dexy starts digging holes.
Daxtara promises to destroy all who stand in her path.
Lloyd actually does destroy someone who stands in Daxtara's path, and regrets it.
All is not as it seems in Shady Grove...
Shaved heads, bizarre body modifications, and more unpleasant situations in which to awaken.
Walt and Al bargain with the enemy.
A shattered people rise up as one.
Walt attempts, and unexpectedly succeeds, to enter the elven fortress.
The inner workings of the Seelie Court are revealed.
Dexy goes into town.
A conflict over information arises.
A series of rather violent noises ensues.
Dexy demonstrates her skill at coaxing enemies to talk.
Dexy revamps Thirteen's balloon while Lloyd and Betty meet with a secret contact.
The town of Shady Grove is under the control of a shadowy conspiracy.
The true nature of the conspiracy is revealed. Sort of.
Lloyd and Betty are captured and threatened.
Al and Walt wait for an appointment.
Eleriel reveals to Walt and Al the Court's master plan.