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Some Things About Karl...

What's Karl's birthday?
23rd September 1972

Where was Karl born?
Manchester

What are Karl's previous jobs?
Mobile DJing "Pilkie's Makin Music" with his mate whose surname was Makin.

Which xfm shows did Karl work on before?
Karl was assistant producer on Tim Lovejoy's "Studio 68" and introduced the competition "Bang Bang, You're Dead" as "Karl The Northern Monkey". This is probably where he gained the experience necessary to read out the prizes for "Rockbusters", though perhaps a little more practice with the questions might have been more in order. I'm not having a go, right.

Does Karl have any other talents?
He's a demon soundclash remixer, having produced the unknown, baby (one more time) on Studio 68 and (apparently) something called "Whitneylicker" (see The Remix Tracklist, show 95, 27th January 2002). (Anyone got a tape of this?)

What does Karl believe in?
Ghosts, intelligent monkeys, people having their heads cut off and walking 32 paces and anything else he reads in the Fortean Times or on the internet that "sounds a bit weird"

What doesn't Karl believe in?
Astrology, reading to the end of stories and getting all the knowledge

What does Karl like?
Things that are "a bit weird", like "The Hairy Chinese Kid", ghost stories, Vicky Lucas.

What doesn't Karl like?
Nudists.

Does Karl have a girlfriend?
Yes, her name's Suzanne.

What exams did Karl pass?
Karl never went back to school to find out what his results were so Ricky and Steve found out for him and announced on the 2nd March 2002 that he got a GCSE grade "E" in History. Karl was amazed, because he didn't remember taking History.

He also "made a little clay man" in art, but "Mrs. Matthews said to me mam and dad that I'd never be a high flier - and that was after I played the drums in 'Little Donkey'."

Who was Karl's closest childhood friend?
Darren Buckley - "all the girls liked him... he had permed hair... like a footballer... his dad was a copper... I wasn't that bothered about having loads of mates... I was happy playing with me magpie..."

Did Karl have any pets?
He had a pet magpie called "Maggie": "...it flew around and it would come to me all the time, then it started pecking me head..." "...it flew away... it was giving me grief towards the end - it was popping me Grifter tyres an' that... flying down, pecking me head."

Apart from the magpie, a succession of cats: "we got through loads of them... we lived near a main road." One of them was often sick, so Karl's mum shaved it to make it easier to clean.

Who else did Karl go to school with?
Two lads with big heads and webbed-feet, one lad with a pigeon-chest

What was the best job Karl ever had?
Paper-round: "you get it out of the way at the start of the day... you're your own boss-" "Well you're not your own boss, the newsagent is"

What is Karl's preferred profession?
Something using tools - a handyman

What is Karl's favourite sound?
Elvis - "In The Ghetto"

What is Karl's least favourite sound?
"Fire engines and that... I think it's a bit unnecessary"

What would Karl Like God To Say To Him When He Arrives At The Gates Of Heaven?
"Just be friendly"

What is Karl's dad like?
An ex-taxi driver. Once, when he was taking a group of handicapped children to the seaside at Blackpool, he put one of them in a wheelie bin because the child was mucking around in his taxi. It was all right though - he stopped on the the way back to pick him up again.

He has now moved to Wales where he enjoys picking up the neighbours' groceries from the telephone box where the delivery person has kindly left them if the people are out.

Is this Karl, Head of a softball league in Manchester?
Who knows...

Thanks to http://www.richard.hare.dsl, it provided all this information, saving me time and effort.




Ricky Gervais

 

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Kilroy's gone, the show's still going but with a different presenter - Pilkington!"

"He's back! The little Jamaican fella's back! This usually means you need to think of an answer in a Jamaican accent. Or not. Or pronounce it slightly differently."

"At what point was it decided that Humpty Dumpty was a giant egg man? There's nothing in the actual rhyme - it's not 'Humpty-dumpty the egg man sat on the wall'"

 

 




Stephen Merchant

 

"I was in an Indian Restaurant the other night and they were slagging you off Rick. Saying 'Oh Ricky Gervais he's just like the character he plays.' And I wanted to go over and have a word, say 'Well, you're partially right'"

"One guy found out his gay boyfriend was having an affair. I Overheard him saying ‘I’m going to do everything in my power to destroy you’."

"But he's not a producer! If he produced the show I wouldn't have reason to criticise!"




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