Starskys Lady

Humor story

 

 

 

“Hey Starsk.”

“Yeah?”

“Did you hear about Faith?”

“Faith? Who’s that? Your new conquest?”

“No, she’s a real fan of yours and she’s had a nasty accident.”

“She is? Oh…she has? What happened and how does she know me? How do you know about her?”

Hutch blushed, “Well, I happen to have overheard Dobey having a conversation with someone on the phone. I think she was called Grace and they were talking about Faith and the accident.”

“Yeah? And what else did you hear?”

“That she is planning to get you in a lot of trouble.”

“Huh?”

“Yes, she’s a writer and she’s planning to cause you a lot of pain.”

“Why would she do that? I don’t even know the chick.”

“It seems that she adores you and the only way she can express that is by hurting you in her stories.”

Starsky looked at Hutch, his hands tight on the wheel, “You’re kidding me, right?”

Hutch shook his head, “No, I’m afraid not.”

“And what are you gonna do about it?”

“Me? What can I do about it?”

“You’re a real friend, pal.”

“I don’t know where she lives and I thought as long as she’s recovering from the accident, you’re safe.”

“And you call yourself a detective. Find out where she lives and do something about her.”

“There’s not much I can do Starsk, it’s just rumors.”

“Rumors my ass. What if she’s back on her feet again and comes after me? You know what women can do to an innocent man. Aren’t you worried that she’s gonna hurt me real bad?”

“Ah Starsk, I know how you are with the ladies. You’ll talk her out of it.”

“It sounds to me she’s not the type you can talk out of anything.”

Hutch shrugged, “I think we still have a little time before she’s going after you. Let’s talk to Dobey about this situation, okay?”

“Humiliating.” Starsky mumbled, “Talking with the boss about a woman who’s gonna hurt me. I’ll be the laughing stock of the precinct.”

“Relax buddy, we’ll find a way out.”

“Easy for you to say Hutch, she’s not after you.”

“You know Starsk, most of the times someone is out to get you, I’m hurting too.”

Starsky nodded, “You deserve that. Are you leaving me alone with a crazy woman hunting me down and hurting me?”

“I never leave you alone, I’m always by your side or at least I’m trying to find you.”

“Yeah you do, that’s true but in this case you’d leave me alone with this Faith wouldn’t you?”

“No I wouldn’t Starsk, honest I wouldn’t. But somehow it’s so funny…”

“Funny? You think it’s funny to be molested by a woman on crutches?”

“No, I didn’t say that. It’s just…how shall I say this…to think that you’d be hurt by a woman…well…it sounds funny to me.”

“You mean that you’re the only guy here in town molested by a woman? And it can’t happen to anybody else?”

“That’s low Starsk.”

“Oh yeah? So is your laughing at my being hurt in the very near future.”

“I’m not laughing at that. Where are you going?”

“I’m going to see Hug and ask him if he has heard something about this Faith. I can’t expect any help from you, can I?”

“Come on Starsk, of course I’ll help you. But seeing Hug isn’t such a bad idea. If anyone knows anything, it’s him.”

“That’s what I thought. Hey Hutch, are you still interested in writing a book?”

“Huh? Why?”

“Well I thought, if you still want to write a book, you could ask this Faith for some tips. You know, her being a writer and all.”

“You want me to ask your future torturer for tips about writing?”

“Yeah, why not? Maybe she’ll forget about hurting me.”

“You think so huh?”

“I hope so.”

“Somehow I have the feeling she doesn’t care for me half as much as she cares for you.”

“I’d say she doesn’t care about me at all. Why else would she wanna hurt me?”

“Isn’t the saying ‘you always hurt the ones you love’?”

“Never heard that one before. But if that’s true I still don’t understand why she’s so obsessed about hurting me.”

“She must like you a lot Gordo, if what I’ve heard is true.”

Starsky stopped the car in the alley behind The Pits. “What did you hear?” he asked suspiciously.

“I’m not sure you wanna hear this.”

“I’m not sure you’re getting out of the car if you don’t tell.”

“Okay, if you put it that way. I’ve heard that she’s written a lot of stories and you’re always the star in them…and hurting…bad.”

Starsky paled, “OMG! Hutch, we got to find this writing, hurting lady before she starts writing again.”

 

Huggy stood behind the bar when the two friends walked in.

“Hey, if that ain’t my two favourite cops. How are you doing?”

“Not too good Hug,” Starsky said solemnly, “I’m the target of some lunatic, hurt loving chick.”

“Ah, you mean Faith?”

“What do you know about this Faith that I don’t?”

“Don’t worry my friend, Faith is a pussycat, she wouldn’t hurt you.”

“Pussycats have claws Hug.” Hutch said, “They can be real mean.”

“Not Faith, oh blond one. Faith is…how shall I say this…Faith is Faith and she’s too kind to hurt anyone.”

“You’d better ask around Hug, ‘cause I don’t think you’re up to date with this one.”

Huggy put two coffee cups in front of the two cops, “Have a coffee and tell me the whole story.”

“I think I need something stronger Hug.” Starsky answered and drank his coffee.

“Stronger will have to wait till we get home Starsk.” Hutch said.

“I don’t wanna drink coffee and wait for the attack here.”

“You just finished your cup.” Huggy pointed out.

“You see what this situation is doing to me? I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore.”

Hutch squeezed his shoulder. “We’ll solve the problem Starsk, you’ll see.”

“So far I don’t see anything solved and I’m still the target. Where does she live Hug, do you know that?” Starsky asked.

“Not sure, but I’ll do my best to find out.”

“Great! Hutch can talk her out of it I’m sure, but we need to know where we can find her.”

“Who said anything about talking to your attacker?”

“I just did and because you’re such a smooth talker, I’m sure you can talk some sense in the woman’s head.”

“But what when she decides to change tactics? What if she’s gonna use me as a pawn to give you some other kind of pain? Have you ever thought of that?”

“No and I’m not gonna think about it now. Besides, if she’s gonna change tactics at least I won’t be physically hurt this time.”

“But I would!”

“You know I’d do anything to find you, don’t you?”

“Yeah but…”

“And you know I’d be so worried and scared about you.”

“Yeah…well..”

“You’d be on my mind twenty four hours a day.”

“I know but…”

“I think it’s time you were on the other side for once, you know, the hurting side.”

“I don’t think that’s…”

“You’d be surprised how relieved you’d feel when I come barging in just in time to save you.”

“I do…”

“And how good I am at comforting you.”

“I know…”

“Yes, I think it’s time for this Faith to change her focus on you for once.”

“I don’t bel…”

“Hey Starsky, I could help you find the blond one. You know I’m good at cracking riddles.”

“Hey!”

“You sure are Hug and I’d be grateful if you would spend your valuable time to help me save Hutch.”

“You two…”

“You’re very welcome Starsky my man. It would be an honour to assist you.”

“You see Hutch, it’s not so bad to be on the hurting side for once. You’d see us in a totally different light.”

“Will you two cut it out!”

“Sure we will, but only if you’re gonna talk this lady out of this ridiculous plan.”

Hutch surrendered, “Okay, I’ll talk to her. Can you figure out where she lives Hug?”

“I can try but why don’t you run her name through the computer? I bet she’s in the machine somewhere.”

“Um, no Hug. You see, it’s a little embarrassing to tell Minnie, or who ever, I’m wanted by a female who wants to hurt me. I do have a reputation to uphold.”

“I see and you’re right Starsky, you couldn’t have a woman take that reputation away from you.”

“I knew you’d understand. Now go and find me the address Hug, I want this thing settled for once and for all.”

Huggy went to the kitchen to make some calls in private and the two friends waited at the bar. Starsky felt a lot better now they had a plan but Hutch felt his stomach clench at the thought of meeting the woman who had harmed his friend in the past and was planning on doing that again.

“How are you gonna do this Hutch? Are you gonna threaten her or are you gonna smooth talk the idea out of her head?”

“I don’t know,” Hutch shrugged, “To be honest Starsk, I’m not sure if this is such a good idea after all.”

“What do you mean ‘not a good idea’? I think it’s a great idea.”

“I bet you do but I’m not so sure I can make this woman change her mind. She seems very determined to me.”

“Oh come on Hutch, you’re the best talking ladies out of bad ideas guy I know. I’m sure you’ll be able to make her change her mind.”

“You think so?” Hutch felt more than a little flattered by Starsky’s comment.

“Sure you are! You’re the best.”

“Well thank you Starsk, I’ll do my best to get you out of this mess.”

“I know you will buddy, I know you will.”

Huggy returned from the kitchen. “I’ve got the address.”

 

“Las Vegas?” Starsky asked, looking at Hutch.

“That’s what the man says.” Huggy confirmed.

“T’riffic,” Starsky mumbled, “How are we gonna do that Hutch? You need to go there and talk to the lady but I don’t think Dobey’ll give us a week off.”

“Maybe we should talk to him Starsk, explain to him that your life is in danger and that we have to go to Las Vegas to solve the problem.”

“No, we can’t do that! Everybody will know and I don’t want that.”

“Dobey won’t tell I’m sure of that. Let’s go and make an end to this lady’s bizarre behaviour.”

“Good luck fellas.” Huggy yelled when they left The Pits through the back door,  “Oh…and be careful out there.”

“We will Hug, we will.”

They drove to the precinct in silence but their thoughts were running wild, trying to figure Faith out.

What the hell did I ever do to her to deserve this?

What the hell did you ever do to deserve this, partner?

I don’t even know the woman!

As far as I know, you don’t even know the woman! Or are you hiding something from me?

I wonder what she looks like.

I wish I knew what she looks like. Maybe she’s a gorgeous lady and I can convince her she doesn’t need to harass my partner.

She could be a real looker and maybe, if Hutch is playing it right, he can convince her she doesn’t need to harass me.

Starsky parked the Torino in its usual spot and they went inside the building.

People were staring at them when they entered the elevator and Starsky had the nasty feeling everybody already knew about his predicament.

They found Dobey in the hall trying to get a candy bar out of the vending machine. He looked annoyed and troubled and the moment he saw his two favourite detectives arrive, he turned away from the machine.

“In my office gentlemen.”

They followed their boss to his office and sat down in silence.

Dobey looked at them, cleared his throat and started, “There’s no way to tell this carefully, so I’ll get to the point straight away. Starsky, you need to hide for a while, there have been made threats against you.”

“I know cap.”

“You know? How the hell do you know that? Has she contacted you?”

“No, she hasn’t but Hutch heard you…”

“You’ve been eavesdropping Hutchinson? And you didn’t come to me to ask what this is all about?”

“Um, no sir, but I thought…”

“Don’t think!” Dobey yelled, “Let me do the thinking in this one.”

“Yes sir.” Hutch mumbled.

“Starsky, you’re going to a safe house and you Hutch, are going with him to guard him. I’ve made the arrangements already so we won’t waste any time.”

“Now wait a minute Cap, there’s no way I’m going to hide from a woman. What about my reputation?”

“Your reputation won’t save you from this woman Starsky.”

“Maybe not, but my reputation will be down the drain if I go to a safe house to hide from a woman!”

“Better your reputation than your life.”

“I won’t have a life when people hear about this!” Starsky yelled.

“You’ll be alive Starsk.” Hutch said softly.

“Alive but no life worth living, thank you very much. Everybody’s gonna make fun of me. ‘Starsky, the ladies’ man, is scared of a woman.’ I’ll never have a date for the rest of my life.”

“I’m sure it’ll never come to that, pal.”

“You’re sure uh? I bet you’d like it, me not dating anymore. Then you’d finally could get nicer girls than the ones you usually date.”

“Hey, that’s not true!” Hutch yelled back at Starsky,  “I date nice girls too. You’re not the only one who…”

“Quiet!” Dobey hollered, “Shut up you two and do as I say.”

“No!” Starsky hollered back and jumped up from the chair.

“Sit down!”

“No! I’m not gonna sit and wait and do nothing while some crazy broad is threatening to torture me. I wanna know who she is and why she wants to hurt me all the time.”

“All the time?” Dobey asked, voice much softer.

“Yeah, it seems that she’s done it before and a lot of shit I’ve been through is her doing.”

“How do you know that? And why don’t I know about it?”

“Just heard it from Hug.”

“So, you go to that pimp first before you come to me?”

“He’s not a pimp. And he knows more than you do.”

“You agree with him Hutchinson?” Dobey sounded hurt and Hutch tried to soften the blow a little.

“Well sir, Hug knows a lot of people who know even more people who know just about everybody. So, it seemed logical to see him first.”

“Hm, yes I see. Did he come up with something?”

“We got the lady’s address.”

“Good, now we have to think of a plan to get her out of the way.”

“We already have a plan Cap.” Hutch said, “ I’m going to talk with her and…”

“Talk with her? Are you out of your mind? You can’t talk with a woman who has torture on her mind?”

“But Cap, if there’s anybody who can talk this Faith out of her wicked ideas it’s Hutch. You never heard a smooth talker like him before.”

“Hm,” Dobey harrumphed, “I’m not so sure that’s a good plan, Starsky. What if she turns against Hutch and starts torturing him too?”

“I’ll be watching his back like always.”

“Suppose that’s not enough this time.”

“I think it is Cap, nobody can talk like Hutch. Especially not when my life is at stake.”

“I don’t know,” Dobey hesitated, “but if you think it’ll work…go ahead. But I want the lady’s address and if I don’t hear from you within two hours, I’ll arrange a rescue operation.”

“That’s not enough time Cap, she lives in Las Vegas.”

“Las Vegas? But that’s not our jurisdiction!”

“We know that Cap, but it’s not that far. I think we can be there tonight and be back tomorrow. What do you think?”

“I think this plan stinks but if this is what you want to try, go ahead.”

“Thanks Cap.” Starsky said.

“You agree with this Hutch?” Dobey asked.

“I think so.”

“What are you waiting for then? Get out of here and fix this.”

 

“I’m gonna call the airline,” Starsky said when they entered the squad room, “Maybe we’ll get lucky and there’ll be two seats on the next flight.”

“Yeah,” Hutch sighed, not feeling very happy with the task of talking a lunatic out of her murderous ideas.

Starsky was dialing the number when Hutch’s phone rang.

“Hutchinson.”

……………………

“What do you mean there are more of them?”

………………………………

“How many?”

………………………….

“How do you know that?”

……………………………

“And you’re sure that’s true?”

…………………………….

“Oh man, Hug. This is much worse than I thought.”

…………………………………

“Yeah, I know.”

…………………….

“Thanks Hug.”

Hutch put down the phone and looked at Starsky who was still talking to the airline employee.

When he finally put down the phone Starsky looked at Hutch, “We’re in. Next flight in ninety minutes.”

“Okay, but I got to tell you something first.”

“No time for that now, buddy. Tell me when we’re flying.”

“Starsk, I think you want to know this.”

“I do? Tell me in the car then. We got to hurry, plane won’t wait.”

Without waiting another second Starsky hurried to the door and Hutch could think of nothing better to do than to follow his partner.

Traffic was heavy on their way to the airport and Starsky had to concentrate real hard to avoid any accidents.

Hutch tried to explain what Huggy had told him but his friend was in no mood to listen. Cursing Starsky drove his baby as fast as he could but it wasn’t fast enough for his liking.

“Get out of my way, fool.”

“Um Starsk, I got…”

“Not now Hutch, I’m busy.”

 “But Starsk…”

“Put the cherry on the roof, I’m in a hurry!”

Hutch put the red light on the Torino’s roof and Starsky flipped the siren’s switch.

It helped to clear the road a little but still not enough for Starsky.

“What are they doing here? Taking a Sunday ride?”

“It’s rush hour Starsk, nothing you can do about that.”

“You think? Watch me.”

He floored the gas pedal and the Torino almost jumped ahead. Hutch was pushed back in his seat and when Starsky took a left corner he almost ended up in his partner’s lap.

“Hey! Watch it you moron, you’re gonna kill us this way.”

“No, I’m not. Don’t worry, I know what I’m doing.”

“Could have fooled me. Look out! It’s a red light.”

“Where? I don’t see any light.”

“Behind us.” Hutch whispered, wiping the sweat from his brow.

“Oh, that light?”

Hutch tried to control his anger, “Yes, that light.”

“It’s behind us so what do you worry about?”

“I’m worried about us arriving alive at the airport.”

“Don’t, we’ll be fine.”

“I doubt that. Starsky look out!”

A flash of yellow whizzed by but to Hutch’s surprise the Torino drove on as if nothing had happened. He looked through the back window and saw the cab stop at the curb, an angry cabdriver getting out and passengers almost fall out of the car. They seemed to be okay and Hutch took a deep breath.

“Starsk, you got to stop. You won’t just kill us but innocent bystanders too!”

“I didn’t hit that car.”

“No, but still you have to slow down.”

“Can’t slow down, we got a plane to catch.”

“There’s always another plane you know.”

“Yeah, but if we don’t get there soon there won’t be any me to catch it. The murderous lady is on to me.”

“Go on like this and we’ll both be soup.”

“Hang on Hutch, I’m gonna race now.”

“Starsky!!”

“Quiet!”

 

“Starsky, are we still in one piece?”

“Sure we are and we’re at the airport too.”

“Thank God, thank God, thank God.”

“Are you all right Hutch? You look very pale.”

“I think I’m gonna be sick.”

“Out! You’re not going to be sick in my car.”

Fresh air, I need fresh air.

Shaking and trembling Hutch leaned against the Torino. He took a few deep breaths and closed his eyes.

“Are you okay Hutch?”

“No, I’m not okay,” he whispered, voice dangerously low, “I’m not okay at all. You idiot! You could have got us killed before the deadly lady could get her hands on you.”

“But we’re not dead and the plane is waiting, so come on. No time to waste.”

“Why don’t I just let Faith have her way with you? Can you tell me that?”

“Because you’re my friend?” Starsky tried.

“I must be out of my mind to try to save you.”

“Aw Hutch, don’t say that. You’re the best friend I ever had and I need you here, babe.”

“You have a hell of a way of showing me that, babe.”

Starsky said nothing, just stared at his shoes and waited for Hutch to get over his anger.

“I need a smoke.” Hutch declared.

“You don’t smoke.”

“I’m gonna start right now.”

“Why?”

“It’s a nicer way to get killed.”

“No, it’s not. It’s painful and you’d be in agony.”

“At least it would give me more time than you do.”

Again Starsky waited in silence.

Hutch sighed and pushed himself away from the car. “Let’s get our tickets.”

 

“What do you mean we’re not registered?” Starsky snapped at the nervous girl behind the counter, “We just called half an hour ago and there were two tickets for us for the next flight.”

“ I’m sorry sir, I’m sure it’s a mistake. I’ll see what I can do for you.”

“You’d better, ‘cause my partner and me have to be on the next flight to Las Vegas.”

“Come on Starsk, take it easy,” Hutch said softly, “It’s not this lady’s fault they’ve messed up things here.”

“I don’t wanna take it easy,” Starsky growled back, “I’ve got no time to take it easy. You think it’s the killer lady messing with our tickets?”

“Well,” Hutch hesitated, “Could be I guess, but I wonder how she knows.”

“This Faith seems to know a lot more about us than we know about her.”

“I know,” confessed Hutch, “that she’s not alone in this torturing business.”

Starsky looked at him, eyes wide with fear and confusion. “Not alone? What do you mean? There are more crazy people after me? How do you know that?”

“I wanted to tell you but you wouldn’t listen, remember? Huggy called just before we left. He’d heard it’s a bunch of women who get their kicks from hurting and torturing you.”

Starsky slid down the counter to the ground. “What have I ever done to deserve this?” he mumbled.

Hutch sat down beside him, “I don’t know buddy, but we’re gonna find out.”

“Um gentlemen? Are you there?” the girl’s voice brought them back on their feet.

“Yes, we’re here.”

“Oh,” she startled, “Um, yes there you are. I’ve been checking things out and there’s been a mistake I’m afraid. There’s no place on the next plane so you’ll have to take a later flight.”

“You’re kidding me, right?” Starsky said, “We’ve got no time to wait. It’s important police business we’re talking about here. So, we have to be on the first plane and I don’t care how you fix this but you will fix it!”

The girl paled visibly and stuttered something, a tear sliding down her cheek. “It’s my first day here sir and I don’t know how I can get you on a plane that’s already overbooked.”

“Don’t cry, my partner didn’t mean to get you into trouble.” Hutch smiled, “He’s just very nervous because he’s been threatened. Please, will you forgive us?”

The frightened girl looked at Hutch and smiled a small smile. “I’m sorry to hear that,” she said, “I’ll see if I can arrange something for you.”

 Hutch took her hand and squeezed it gently. “Thank you, we appreciate that.”

She nodded, dried her tears and disappeared into a back room.

Hutch grinned at Starsky, “That’s how you do it partner, no anger but friendliness, that’s all.”

Starsky scowled at him, “Yeah well, I’d like to see you when your life is in danger. I bet you’d get angry too then.”

“Maybe, maybe,” Hutch said, still grinning, “but you should know that threatening little ladies will get you nowhere.”

“I’m ready to threaten every little lady who’s getting near to me right now.” Starsky answered angry, “Every little lady could be Faith or one of her henchwomen.”

“Don’t get paranoid now Starsk; they don’t know that we know about them.”

“They don’t? And how do you know that?”

“Oh well…I don’t know that for sure but I can’t imagine that they know.”

“And I can’t imagine that I’m their favourite guy to torture.”

“No, hm…well…maybe you’re right.” Hutch reluctantly agreed, “I wish I knew what they look like.”

“Me too,” Starsky nodded, “It would make it a lot easier to identify them.”

They kept looking around until the girl came back from the backroom.

“I think I can help you after all,” she said with a smile on her face, “You see, we always have a few seats for emergencies like this. They won’t be sold until thirty minutes before take-off.”

“And you didn’t know that ten minutes ago?” Starsky asked, not convinced that the girl was as innocent as she appeared to be.

“No, I didn’t. It’s my first day and the person who’d be teaching me the ropes is sick.”

“So you’re all alone on your first day?” Hutch asked with sympathy.

She nodded and smiled shyly at him.

“I’m sorry we gave you such a hard time.” Hutch apologized.

“That’s okay sir, you couldn’t know and I should have known about the spare seats.”

“Are we done with apologizing?” Starsky asked impatiently, “We’re in a hurry, can’t miss the plane.”

“I’m sorry, here are the tickets. Gate twenty five in thirty minutes.” She handed them the tickets and Hutch paid her.

“Thank you for helping us out.” He said.

“You’re welcome sir and I hope everything will be all right.”

Finally they were on their way to the gate and Hutch felt his stomach clench again at the thought of Faith, the killer lady in Las Vegas.

 

 

“I think I’m gonna call Hug before we fly.” Hutch said, “We’ve got a little time left before boarding.”

“You think he’s got more information?”

Hutch shrugged, walking towards a pay phone, “He said he’d keep digging.”

“I hope he can give us more details on the lady. Maybe he can tell us what she looks like.” Starsky said hopefully.

“Yeah, that would really help.” Hutch was already dialing the familiar phone number.

“Hey Hug, it’s Hutch. Anything new?”

……………………………..

“Oh…”

………………………………….

“Yeah.”

………………………………….

“She did that?”

……………………………………..

“No kidding. It’s getting worse and worse.”

………………………………………….

“I will and thanks Hug, we owe you.”

Starsky looked at Hutch, his face a big question mark. “What did he say? Does he know what she looks like?”

“No, he doesn’t but he had some news.” Hutch waited, not wanting to scare his partner more, but he knew he had no choice.

“You see Starsk, this lady is not working alone…”

“I know that.” Starsky interrupted him impatiently.

“Yeah, but it turns out to be quite a syndicate of women who are writing stories about us. And who like hurting us.”

“Me! You mean they like hurting me.”

“You hurt I hurt, you know that Starsk.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“So, it’s a group of women who like tormenting us and…do you remember ‘Big Tony’?”

Starsky swallowed dryly, “Don’t tell me they were behind that nightmare?”

Hutch nodded, “It was Faith with some help. Hug is trying to find out more, so we’ll call him from Las Vegas.”

Starsky shivered, “I don’t think I wanna go no more.”

Hutch slung his arm around his friend’s shoulders, “Come on Starsk, I’m with you and I’ll do anything I can to get this matter solved.”

Slowly they made their way to gate twenty-five. And though Starsky almost felt sick at the thought of meeting his writing nemesis, he never stopped looking around. Every woman he saw looked dangerous to his eyes and it was for the first time in his life that he saw women that way.

“I don’t think I’ll ever gonna date a woman again,” he said miserable, “Can’t trust them as far as I can see them anymore.”

Hutch winced at the thought of a not dating Starsky. “You’ll date again, don’t worry,” he said, “Once we have this cleared there won’t be a woman safe from your devastating charm.”

“You think so?”

“Sure I do. We won’t let any woman get in the way of your or my love life.”

“Hm,” Starsky thought about that for a minute,” Maybe you’re right. Maybe I should trust you more, if anyone can talk some reason into them it’s you.”

Hutch wasn’t so sure of that but for the sake of Starsky’s feelings he didn’t mention his own insecurity.

They arrived at gate twenty-five at the same time a group of women did and they both stared at the chattering and laughing group. All kind of accents were spoken and Hutch identified an English and, what he thought, was an Australian one. He felt the cold fingers of fear around his chest when he remembered Huggy’s words, “They’re from all over the world Hutch, not just American women.”

He hadn’t told Starsky that, keeping the information as briefly as possible, to not scare the man more than he already was.

He felt Starsky tense beside him. “You think they could be the killer ladies, Hutch?” he heard Starsky ask in a small voice.

“I don’t know Starsk, but don’t worry, they won’t try anything here.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah, until now they’ve only struck when there were no people to witness anything.”

“Good.”

“Come on, let’s board the plane uh?”

“Yeah, okay.”

When they sat down in their seats Starsky kept looking around and to his horror he saw the chattering ladies sit right behind them.

“Hey Hutch,” he whispered, “They’re behind us. You really think we’re safe?”

“I think we are buddy, don’t worry. It’s just a short flight; we’ll be in Las Vegas before you know it. Don’t pay attention to them, they’re probably just on a spree.”

Who are you trying to fool here, Hutchinson? You’re as suspicious as he is.

The moment the plane took off Starsky grabbed Hutch’s arm and squeezed it hard.

“What if they wanna try something in the plane?” he whispered, “We’re helpless here.”

“No, they won’t,” Hutch whispered back, “There’s no way they’ll try something here. Where could they go, no place to hide in here for them.”

“Oh yeah, you’re right,” Starsky whispered, still holding Hutch’s arm, “But what if they have something planned when we get off the plane?”

“Starsk, calm down,” Hutch whispered, urgency in his voice, “We don’t even know if they’re the killer bunch from Las Vegas.”

“No, you’re right. Forgot about that.” Starsky sighed, but didn’t let go of Hutch’s arm.

“Can you let go of me Starsk?” Hutch asked, “I don’t know what we look like when you hold me like this but I bet it will make some people think.”

“ I don’t care,” Starsky said, “I’m not gonna let go of you. You’re my lifeline, my anchor in this.”

“What?” Hutch laughed, “Where the hell is that coming from?”

“I don’t know but it sounds nice, doesn’t it?”

“Sounds like you’ve been reading too many cheap books.”

Starsky shrugged, squeezing Hutch’s arm even harder. “I count on you keeping me safe, so I won’t let go of you until we have the killer ladies safe behind bars.”

Hutch sighed, closed his eyes and gave up. This is gonna be a long flight.

 

 

It was indeed a very long flight for Hutch, with Starsky clinging to him like a drowning man and the laughing, chattering women behind them. He didn’t trust them for a second but knew he couldn’t share his worries with his frightened partner; Starsky would panic even more than he had already and if there was one thing he didn’t need, it was Starsky having a panic attack in an airplane.

He sighed an enormous sigh of relief when they finally landed. They didn’t leave the plane until the women were gone.

Starsky looked around the plane to see if the situation was safe.

“Hey Hutch,” he whispered, “Are they really gone?”

“Yeah, they’re gone. We can leave now with dignity.”

“Who cares about dignity,” Starsky muttered, “I just don’t want them to get me.”

“They won’t. Now come on and let’s go before the plane returns to Los Angeles.”

“Not a bad idea,” Starsky sighed, walking behind Hutch, “Why did we come to Las Vegas anyway? Tell me, why we had to come to the lion’s den ourselves, uh?”

“Because we’re the only ones who can nail these homicidal maniacs?” Hutch asked.

“Must be it.” Starsky said with desperation in his voice.

“As long as we’re together, we’ll be fine buddy.”

“Says you, but do you remember ‘Big Tony’?  We were together then and he almost killed me.”

They left the plane and walked to the departure hall. The women were still there, talking, laughing and looking at the two friends with hungry eyes.

“Oh shit Hutch, it must be them. Look at them, all bloodlust and murder in their eyes.”

“It could be just ‘lust’ Starsk, it could be that they’re looking at us with a different kind of hunger.”

Starsky stood behind Hutch, looking over his shoulder, “You think so?”

“Well…no, but it could be.”

“Dream on Blondie, they’re after me but not for my sexy body.”

Hutch snorted, “Sexy body? You? Could have fooled me.”

“Jealous Hutchinson?”

“Of what? Your…wait, they’re moving.”

The group of women gave the two friends a last hungry look and disappeared laughing through the door.

The two cops sighed in unison a deep sigh and slowly went on their way outside.

“We should have taken the Torino.” Starsky said.

“We can rent a car here.”

“They are always lousy cars.”  Starsky grumbled.

“Stop complaining and follow me. “ Hutch ordered and walked to the nearest rent-a-car business.

Starsky looked around but didn’t see the women and still not sure whether they were safe or not for the moment he followed his partner.

“I knew it,” he said, “just old heaps of junk.”

“Don’t let the way these cars look fool you, gentlemen.” Said a voice behind them.

They turned around and saw an old, balding man coming their way.

“Why shouldn’t we?” Starsky asked suspiciously.

“Well, despite the way they look, they’re real monsters to drive.”

“There’s not a car in the world that I can’t handle.” Starsky said it with pride and Hutch grinned.

“If you say so,” said the man, “but don’t think these cars are pussycats, they’re real tigers under the hood, if you get my drift.”

“Hm, that’s the way I like them.”

“Which one do you want?” the man asked.

“None of them,” Hutch answered, “We want a solid car that won’t leave us stranded somewhere. Our lives may depend on it.”

“I do have some beauties over there.” The man pointed, “I guess you could call those dependable.”

“Why do you use the old cars, I don’t think anyone wants to drive those.” Starsky asked.

“Ah, they don’t belong to the business, they’re for the next demolition race.”

Starsky’s mouth fell open. “And you wanted to give us one of these wrecks?”

The man grinned, “Of course not, it was a joke, just a joke.”

“I don’t find it funny!” Starsky snapped, “I don’t like your sense of humor.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” the old man said, still grinning, “but it’s all the humor I got.”

Starsky turned to Hutch who was grinning at him. “Wipe that grin of your face partner, and get us a car. I’m fed up with this joker.”

“Ah, come on Starsk, I think it was funny.”

“Oh yeah? I always thought you have a lousy sense of humor and this just proves I’m right.”

Still laughing Hutch followed the old man to another part of the car park where the rental cars were. He made his choice without asking Starsky who walked behind him still mumbling and grumbling.

After signing the lease and collecting the car keys the two friends headed for the car. Starsky’s face fell when he saw the car Hutch had chosen. “Couldn’t you have picked out a better car than this?” he asked, “It’s the same as yours, just a little less crappy.”

“Shut up Starsk, you could have said something when we picked it out.”

“You picked it out, you could have asked me what I had in mind.”

“I know what you had in mind and I don’t want to drive another tomato.”

“Who said anything about a tomato? They don’t even have beauties like that here.”

“Shut it and get in!”

“Where are we going?”

“We got to find a payphone and call Huggy.”

“Why didn’t you call from the airport?”

“I got a little distracted by the women.”

“Oh…yes…me too.”

“Now, hang on, here we go.” And with that Hutch floored the gas pedal and left the parking lot with squealing tires.

 

****

 

 

 

“How far is it?” Starsky wanted to know when they finally were on their way in the rented car.”

“Don’t know, but it can’t be far.”

“You got a plan?”

“No, but I’ll think of something.” Hutch answered, “Let’s call Huggy first. Maybe he knows more so we can make a real plan.”

“Okay, hey there’s a phone.”

Hutch parked the car near the payphone and they both got out of the car. Hutch dialed the number and with Starsky’s head against his own he tried to hear anything.

“Give me some space Starsk, I can’t hear a thing.”

“I wanna hear what Hug’s got to say.” Starsky complained but stepped aside.

“I’ll fill you in later.”

“You better,” Starsky muttered, “Don’t wanna be kept in the dark you know.”

“Shut u…hi Hug, it’s Hutch. Got something new for us?”

…………………………………………………….

“Oh.”

………………………………………………………

“Shit.”

“What?” Starsky hissed.

“Yeah, I see. Sounds weird.”

“What sounds weird?” Starsky wanted to know.

“Well, seems we got some weirdos on our hands.”

“Weirdos? What weirdos?” Starsky almost yelled, panic audible in his voice.

“What was that Hug? Starsky is yelling in my ear.”

……………………………………………….

“Yeah, you’re right. Will do and thanks again Hug. I’ll try to call you later again.”

“What weirdos and what did Hug tell you about them?”

“Let’s get in the car, it’s not safe to stay here in the open.”

Starsky looked around, saw nothing suspicious but followed Hutch back to the car. When they were seated again Hutch put the key in the ignition but didn’t turn it.

“I think we gotta stake the house out,” he said, “Hug told me the killer gals are having a meeting tonight.”

“A meeting? Tonight? What the hell are they planning you think?”

“I don’t know Starsk, but we will find out. Now, let’s get something to eat and then we should go and look for the house they’re going to have their meeting.”

“I’m not hungry.” Starsky said, “I don’t think I can eat here with the killer gals near by.”

“We can take some food with us for tonight too, but I think you should try to eat something.”

“It’s the first time you’ve wanted me to eat, do you know that?”

“I never tell you not to eat Starsk.”

“No, but you’re always nagging me about eating while we’re at work.”

“That’s because you can’t stop stuffing yourself with all kind of crap.”

“That’s what I mean Hutch, you sometimes sound like my mother.”

“I do uh? Have you ever thought of why I do that?”

“Because it’s in your nature?”

“No, because you need it pal.”

“What? I need you to act like my mother? Thank you very much pal.”

Hutch grinned and started the engine. “Let’s go to town and buy something to eat anyway.”

Starsky looked angry at him but then remembered Hutch’s part of the conversation with Huggy. His curiosity got the better of him and he asked,” What was that weirdo stuff about?”

“Uh?” Hutch had a little trouble with his friend’s sudden change of topic, “Oh, you mean the weirdos?”

“Yes I mean the weirdos. Who are they and why are they after me?”

“Well, Hug got word that there is some sort of society, mainly women, that finds extreme satisfaction in causing us problems and hurting you is their main goal in life. It seems that their leader is some broad from Boston who has the reins firmly in hand and makes them write all kind of plans which they execute later.”

Starsky stared at him, terror in his eyes. “You mean, it’s a professional gang with a leader?”

“Don’t know if they’re professionals but they certainly succeed in making our lives a living hell sometimes.”

“God Hutch, I don’t think you should talk with them. What if they decide to take you prisoner to lure me in?  I guess they know how much you mean to me and that using you to get me would be a perfect plan.”

“From what I heard it’s something they would do, yes. But maybe it’s our only chance to talk some sense into them.”

“No! I won’t let you do it Hutch. It was a stupid plan anyway. We got to think of something else.”

“Let’s have coffee over there,” Hutch pointed at a little diner, “and see if we can think of some other plan.”

“Okay,” Starsky agreed, “but I’m not gonna let you talk with the lunatic bunch. They should be in Cabrillo, that’s the right place for lunatics like them.”

“Yeah, I agree but since they’re not we’ll have to stop them.”

“Can’t say I’m looking forward to it.” Starsky admitted.

“Me neither, Starsk,” Hutch said while he parked the car in front of the diner, “but we have to do something about them before they kill you.”

Starsky shuddered. “I’m not afraid of dying, but the way these monsters might try to kill me makes my worst nightmare seem like a good night’s sleep.”

 

 

Sitting in the darkest corner of the restaurant the two friends tried to come up with a solid plan. The coffee in front of them turned cold while they were whispering their ideas to each other.

“We gotta call Dobey,” Hutch thought, “He’s got to know where we are and what we’re doing.”

“Yeah and maybe he found out something important in the mean time.”

“I think we should inform the local police just in case,” Hutch thought but Starsky wouldn’t hear of it.

“It’s bad enough Dobey and Hug know about it, I don’t want anybody else to know I’m being stalked and tortured by a bunch of women. Think what it would do to my image uh? Man, they’d never let me hear the end of it.”

“Better that than being tortured and killed buddy.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” Starsky muttered, “You’re not the one they’ll be laughing at.”

“They will if I let the killer bunch get away with killing you.”

“Huuutch!” Starsky closed his eyes in shock, “don’t say that please, I’m getting sick just at the thought.”

Hutch grabbed his coffee cup with shaking hands and downed the cold coffee in one gulp.

“Me too,” he mumbled and made a face as the taste of the cold coffee hit his taste buds.

“You got the address, right?” Starsky asked.

“Um, yeah I think I got it here.” Hutch’s hand disappeared in his jacket pocket and he came back with a rumpled piece of paper in it. “Must be it.”

“Where does that Faith creep live?”

“Hm, let me see. Well, that shouldn’t be too far from here.”

“Where?” Starsky demanded and Hutch handed over the piece of paper.

“Where is that?” Starsky asked but Hutch shrugged, “I’m gonna ask the waitress.” He said.

“Are you sure? Maybe she’s one of them.”

“I doubt that.”

“You do? And why if I may ask.”

“I don’t know, she just doesn’t strike me as a killer lady, that’s all.”

“Shows what you know.” Starsky sneered.

At that moment the waitress approached their table, “Do you want a re-fill”

Two pair of blue eyes stared at her in shock but then Hutch composed himself, “Yes, please.”

Starsky kept staring at her, not able to utter a sound.

The gray haired woman with friendly green eyes smiled, “Do you want anything to eat?”

She filled Hutch’s cup and then looked at Starsky, “You want me to pour you a fresh coffee?”

“Um…yeah, yes thank you.”

She nodded and took a clean cup from another table. “Here you are. Nothing else?”

“No not yet, maybe later.” Hutch answered.

Okay,” she said and turned to walk away.

“Wait,” Hutch said, “Do you know where this is?” he showed her the address and waited.

“Let’s see,” she said and put on her reading glasses she carried with her in her apron pocket. “Oh yes, it’s not far from here.” She pointed out the direction and gave them a detailed description how to reach the house.

“Thank you,” Hutch said, “Do you by any chance know the people who live there?”

Starsky was ready to crawl under the table at that point. He didn’t understand why Hutch kept asking questions to a woman they didn’t know. Starsky thought he’d never trust any woman ever again, no matter her age or her looks.

He tried to kick Hutch in the shin under the table but he missed and hit the leg of the table instead, spilling the coffee on the table.

“Oh, let me clean that for you.” The waitress said and hurried to the kitchen to get a cloth.

“Why do you keep asking her about the murdering lunatics.” He hissed.

“She knows people from here Starsk, she could know something we can use.”

“What if she’s one of them?”

“Look at her, she’s almost ninety years old.” Hutch exaggerated.

“She can be a hundred and forty eight as far as I’m concerned but that doesn’t make her innocent in my book.”

“Come on Starsk, don’t be ridiculous. It’s just a nice old lady.”

“Yeah? I bet that killer bunch looks nice too but they’re still after me.”

The waitress returned with a cloth and cleaned up the mess on the table, then she poured some more coffee in the cups and smiled. A cruel smile, Starsky thought and shuddered.

“If there’s anything you want, just call.” She said and turned away from the table.

Nervous, Starsky took a swallow of the hot coffee and cursed when he burnt his mouth, “God dammit, I knew it.”

“Knew what?”

“It’s dangerous here.”

“Just because you burnt your mouth? Looks like your own stupidity to me.”

“It’s the environment, it’s making me do stupid things. There’s danger in the air.”

“ No, it’s your own fear that’s making you do that.”

Starsky thought about that for a second.

“Maybe you’re right, but I have every reason to be scared. Just the memory of ‘Big Tony’ makes me feel nauseous and I don’t have the intention to go through such an ordeal ever again.”

Hutch sighed, “Me neither Starsk, believe me.”

They drank their coffee in silence, looking around for anything out of the ordinary, but nothing roused their suspicion and they relaxed marginally.

Hutch looked at his watch when they finished the coffee. “It’s almost five o’clock. Let’s go and see where the lady lives and find a place where we can keep an eye on the house.”

The uneasy feeling in Starsky’s stomach intensified but with his well known energy he jumped to his feet, “Okay, let’s see if we can lay our hands on them before they start any of their plans.”

 

Hutch insisted on going to the local police station to see what they knew about Faith.

“Why should we wander around if they can tell us exactly what to expect?” he asked his hesitant friend.

“Who says they know anything about her?” Starsky asked, “For all we know she’s a law abiding citizen in her daily life and she does the torture and killing in her basement.”

“It’s always good to find out if there’s anything we ought to know.” Hutch insisted, “Maybe there is something suspicious known but they can’t prove anything.”

“Can’t we leave me out of this?” Starsky begged, “I don’t want them pitying me or thinking I can’t take care of myself.”

“Sure, we could say it’s a case that brought us to Las Vegas and that Faith’s name was mentioned by one of our snitches.”

“That would be the truth too.” Starsky said, relief in his voice.

“Yeah, gimme the city map, it’s in the glove compartment.”

They were still parked in front of the little diner and Hutch studied the map, looking around to see where they were. Finally he found what he was looking for. “Hey, the police station is just around the corner. We could walk that distance within three minutes.”

“I’m not walking here,” Starsky shook his head, “What if they’re in the neighbourhood and they spot us? They’d grab me before we’d even set foot in the precinct.”

“Okay,” Hutch agreed, “We’ll drive.”

Before they knew it they parked in front of the Las Vegas precinct. It was a large building and people were going in and out in a steady stream.

“Lots of crimes here.” Starsky muttered, looking at the coming and goings.

“With killer women living here it’s no surprise to me.” Hutch said.

“I should feel safe in front of this building,” Starsky confessed, “but somehow I don’t. You think our killer bunch has the force in their pocket?”

Hutch shrugged, “I can’t imagine a few women having the entire police force on their side but there’s always the chance they ‘bought’ a few officers.”

“I don’t want to, but we have to go inside.” Starsky sighed and opened the car door.

“Yes,” Hutch agreed, opening his car door too, “We better go and see how things are here.”

They hurried inside and looked around. It wasn’t very different from any precinct they’d ever been to but the atmosphere was different; they didn’t feel safe and that was a strange feeling for the both of them.

They approached the officer behind a desk and showed him their badges.

“Hey, fellow cops.” The man said smiling, “What can I do for you?”

“We need some information about someone for one of our cases and the trail led to Las Vegas.” Hutch explained.

“I think you’d better go to the third floor and ask for Lt. Hanson. He’s the one who knows what’s going on around here.”

“Thanks.”

They took the elevator and went to the third floor. It was busy with cops and suspects and the two men from Bay City recognized the turmoil that buzzed around the corridor.

“Lt. Hanson?” Hutch asked when a uniformed officer passed by.

The man pointed at a room and walked on without saying a word.

“Nice.” Starsky mumbled and watched the officer leave in a hurry.

Hutch was already on his way and Starsky hurried after him.

The room they entered was just like their own squad room and again Hutch asked, at nobody in particular,  “Lt. Hanson?”

“Who wants to know?” A huge man with bright red hair looked at them suspiciously.

“Detective Starsky and Hutchinson from Bay City.” Hutch answered, showing his ID.

“Okay, come with me.” the man said and let them to an empty interrogation room.

“I am Lt. Hanson,” he said offering the two friends his hand, “Sit down and tell me what two cops from Bay City want from me.”

They sat down and Hutch tried to explain, without giving too much background information, why they were in Las Vegas.

“We’re looking for a certain Faith Goodbody and we were told she lives in Las Vegas. We’d like to know if you know anything about her.”

Their Las Vegas colleague raised his bushy eyebrows and nodded. “I heard about her but nothing too bad. What do you want from her?”

“Um, just want to ask her some questions, that’s all.”

“I see. Well, you’re in the wrong place fellows; she does live in Las Vegas but not in this neighbourhood. She’s a desert loving type and lives at the edge of town .”

“The desert?” Starsky echoed, “And where exactly?”

“Not far, don’t worry. I’d say it’s about ten miles from here.”

“What do you know about her?” Hutch wanted to know.

“Nothing bad, just that she had an accident and was lucky she wasn’t killed.”

“Yeah, lucky lady.” Starsky mumbled.

“How come you know about that?” Hutch was curious how a cop in Las Vegas knew about an accident a woman living near the desert had had.

“The deputy sheriff is my brother in law and he has his office near her place.” Lt. Hanson explained.

Hutch nodded and Starsky stared at the floor, muttering about nosy cops and lucky killer women.

“Well,” Hutch said, “We’ll go to the desert and see what the sheriff can tell us.”

Hanson stood up and shook their hands. “Tell him I sent you, that’ll make it easier for you.”

They thanked him for his help and left the precinct. Back in the car, Hutch studied the map and Starsky looked out of the side window, still muttering and mumbling.

“It’s really close Starsk, we should be there in fifteen minutes.”

“Can’t wait,” Starsky snapped, “Now we have to explain all of this again to a stranger. How more people will know that we want this Faith babe. I bet someone is gonna warn her soon. And how come the waitress didn’t tell us? I bet she’s in on it too.”

 

 

*****

 

 

 

“I’m getting depressed.” Starsky announced when they were driving towards the desert.

“No you’re not.” Hutch replied firmly.

“And why not?” Starsky asked challenging.

“We got no time for that.”

“Ha, who ever has?”

“Nobody, that’s why you can’t be depressed at the moment,”

“Did anybody ever tell you you have a weird sense of logic?”

Hutch laughed, “I’m sure you’re gonna tell me Starsk.”

“No I’m not, I’m depressed enough as it is.”

“There’s no need to be depressed,” Hutch tried to lift his friend’s spirits, “I’m sure we’re gonna find the women and…”

“And get killed.” Starsky growled, “Why did we ever think we can talk to…to these creatures from hell and get away unharmed?”

“Because we’re together and no bloodthirsty bunch of evil women will ever beat us. It’s Me and Thee buddy, don’t forget that!”

“You really believe that?”

Hutch nodded vigorously, “Of course I do, what do you think? Didn’t we beat Simon Marcus? Didn’t we beat the professor with his nasty poison? Didn’t we…”

“All right, all right, you made your point. But I still have this feeling we’re not gonna get out of this that easily.”

“Well, I didn’t say it’s gonna be easy.”

“No, you didn’t but you think it’ll be a piece of cake, don’t you?”

“No Starsk, I don’t think that but to be honest, a few women with murder on their mind can’t be too hard to deal with.”

“Why were you so nervous then when we left home? Don’t tell me you thought it’d be a piece of cake then.”

Hutch had the decency to blush. “No, I thought it might be a little difficult to talk to the women,” he lied, “but now we’re here I don’t feel scared at all.”

“Permission to be scared for the both of us.”

“Aw come on pal, I’m sure the moment they see you they’ll act like most women do when they see you.”

Starsky stared at his friend, mouth open.

“Close your mouth, you look ridiculous.”

“Better ridiculous than dead.” Mumbled Starsky, scowling at Hutch.

“You should know the effect you have on women by now.”

“Yeah well,” Starsky looked pleased at the thought but that look disappeared quickly again. “Why do they wanna hurt me then?” he asked.

“Maybe because you look cute when you’re hurting?” Hutch teased.

“Don’t be funny Hutchinson, it’s no joke you know.”

Hutch shrugged. “Desert.” He said.

“Huh?”

“The desert, we’re here.”

“Aw shit, aw shit, aw shit.” Starsky swore, “Showtime uh?”

“First we have to find the house and then we’ll see what we’ll do.”

“You got a map?”

“No but I think we should visit the sheriff first.”

“Where is his office?”

“Starsky,” Hutch snapped, impatiently, “how do I know? I’ve never been here before.”

“T’riffic,” Starsky sighed, “now we have to ask where to find him and who knows we might ask the wrong person.”

“Everybody here knows where the sheriff’s office is.”

“So do the killer women and I sure don’t wanna ask them where the sheriff is.”

“Hm, yes…well let’s drive around and maybe we’ll find it by ourselves.”

“With our luck,” Starsky grumbled, “we’ll still be driving around tomorrow morning.”

“It’s not New York, we should be able to find it soon.”

“Yeah sure.”

“Hey, we’re detectives; we can do it.”

Starsky didn’t answer but looked out the side window. “It’s a nice place, don’t you think? I wonder how a place like this can harbor creepy women like Faith and that lot.”

“Scum is everywhere Starsk, every nice place on earth has its creeps.”

“I guess so.”

Hutch squinted his eyes at the lowering sun, “I think I found it.”

“Where?”

“On your right, next to the gas station.”

Starsky looked disappointed, “That’s the sheriff’s office?”

“It says so on the sign.”

“Oh boy, we’re in trouble.”

“Why? Never judge things by their appearance, it’s the inside that counts.” Hutch lectured.

“Hutch! It’s a shack, nothing more.”

“I’m glad you don’t call it a hutch,” Hutch mumbled but Starsky heard him and chuckled.

“I didn’t think of that,” he hiccupped, “but you’re right, it is a hutch.”

“Knock it off, moron.”

“You started the hutch thing.”

“You don’t have to agree with me.”

“But it’s funny.”

“Get out of the car.”

“Huh? Why?”

“We have to go inside and ask the sheriff some questions, remember?”

“Oh yes, I almost forgot.”

They left the car and Hutch closed the doors carefully. “No need to invite trouble.” He said to himself.

They stood in front of the sheriff’s office and looked at the old building with narrowed eyes.

“I don’t know Hutch, it almost looks abandoned. You don’t think the killer bunch had their way with the sheriff, do you?”

“Why should they? They only have eyes for you.”

“Not only eyes.” Starsky shivered.

“Come on, let’s go in.”

They opened the unpainted door and cautiously stepped inside. It was rather dark and they could only see the desk in the middle of the room.

“Anybody here?” Hutch asked, his voice hesitant, “We need some help.”

It was silent in the office and there seemed to be nobody present. Hutch called again, “Hello, we need help. Anybody here?”

The door behind them squeaked and shut with a bang. Starsky grabbed Hutch’s arm, “Let’s get out of here, there’s nobody.”

“That’s ridiculous Starsk, it’s a sheriff’s office for god’s sake. There should be somebody.” But he didn’t feel as confident as his words sounded.

“There’s nobody Hutch,” Starsky’s voice sounded scared, “I wanna go outside.”

“Okay coward, we’ll go.”

“I’m not a coward, just careful.”

“Yeah right…” Hutch’s words were cut off when the door flew open and a boy came in. Starsky yelped in surprise and fear and hid behind his partner’s tall frame. Hutch scrambled backwards and stepped on his partner’s toes. Starsky yelped again and cursed but stayed where he was, looking over Hutch’s shoulder.

The boy was about ten years old and looked at them, “What are you doing here?” he asked.

“Uh, we’re looking for the sheriff.” Hutch answered, elbowing his friend in the ribs.

“What?” Starsky hissed.

“It’s just a kid.” Hutch hissed back over his shoulder.

The kid looked at them as if they had grown two heads, “This is not the sheriff’s office.” He said.

Starsky refound his courage and came to stand next to Hutch. “It isn’t?” he asked, “but the sign says it is.”

“That’s an old sign and this is the old office.” The boy shrugged, “it’s our clubhouse now.”

“It is uh?” Hutch looked around and had to admit it didn’t look as an office in use.

“That’s cool.” Starsky said, “I always wanted to have a clubhouse when I was a kid.”

“Where can we find the sheriff?” Hutch wanted to know, not interested in Starsky’s childhood wishes.

The boy went outside and the two cops followed him.

“What’s your name?” Starsky asked, still thinking about the clubhouse he never had.

“Toby.”

“Okay Toby, can you tell us where we can find the sheriff?”

“Sure,” Toby said and pointed at a big building at the end of the street, “there’s the new sheriff’s office. Are you in trouble?”

“No, we’re not. We just have to talk to him, that’s all.” Hutch said and started walking towards the car.

“I don’t think he’s in a good mood today.” Toby said and Hutch turned around.

“Why’s that?” Starsky asked curious, his dream of having a clubhouse forgotten.

“My Dad says he’s been fighting with his wife.”

“Oh? And how does your dad know?”

Toby shrugged again, “He’s the deputy sheriff.”

“Maybe it’s better to talk with your dad then.” Hutch thought.

“Well,” Toby hesitated, “maybe it is but you can’t.”

Starsky frowned, “And why is that?”

“He’s away for a few days and I don’t know where he is.” Toby looked miserable and added, “I think he’s angry with my mom.”

Hutch crouched besides Toby, “I’m sorry to hear that Toby, but maybe you’re wrong and  your dad had to go away for his work.”

“Your dad will come back kiddo,” Starsky added, “I’m sure he will.”

Toby nodded, “It happened before and he always came back.” He agreed, still looking sad.

“See? I can’t believe he would leave a great kid like you.”

Toby smiled at them and turned to go back to the clubhouse. “It must be the job,” he said sounding much older than his actual age, “ too much tension.”

Before one of the friends could reply Toby disappeared in the old office.

“Poor kid,” Starsky looked at the closed door, “I hope his father comes back soon.”

Hutch nodded, coming up from his crouch, “Yeah, must be hard for the boy.”

“It’s a cool clubhouse,” Starsky said, “I wonder what club it is.”

“As long as it’s not a youth gang.” Hutch shrugged.

“A youth gang? It’s the deputy’s son for crying out loud. Of course it’s not a gang!”

Hutch walked to the car, “So you think cop’s kids never take the wrong path?”

“Yeah…no…I don’t know. When I think of Cal I can’t imagine him going the wrong way. His father would kill him.”

“And you? You’re a cop’s son too.”

Starsky climbed in the car and slammed the car door shut. Hutch slid behind the wheel and looked at him questioningly.

“So?” Starsky retorted, “You mean anything with that remark?”

“Me? No not all, but you are a cop’s son aren’t you?”

“You know I am.”

“And you ended up on the right side of the law, didn’t you?”

“Eventually.”

“But Nicky,” Hutch went on, “ he didn’t do so good. Which proves my point.”

“You had a point then?” Starsky asked sarcastically.

“Sure I had. I don’t think it’s making any difference what your background is, there’s always a chance you end up at the wrong side of the law.”

He started the engine and checked the rear-view mirror. “And you know I’m right!”

“Maybe, but Toby is not in a gang, I’m sure of that.”

 

 

The new sheriff’s office was a modern building with lots of windows and it made the two Bay City detectives feel like they entered the next century.

“Wow,” Starsky said in awe, “just look at that!”           

Hutch said nothing but looked at the entrance.

“We’ve got to go in, don’t we?” Starsky didn’t feel very comfortable at the thought but knew they had no choice.

“Yep,” Hutch nodded, “time to face the music, buddy.”

Bracing themselves for the meeting with the sheriff they entered the building. Inside they were welcomed by a refreshing coolness and a lovely lady behind a desk.

“Can I help you?” she asked, smiling friendly.

“Uh yes,” Hutch answered and showed her his badge, “We need to talk with the sheriff.”

“What is it about?”

“I can’t tell you that, it’s classified information.”

She nodded in understanding, “I’ll see if the sheriff can see you.”

She picked up the phone and dialed a number. “Sheriff, I have two Bay City detectives to see you.”

She smiled at them and put the phone down. “He can see you, gentlemen. Take the elevator to the third floor. Right opposite the elevator is the sheriff’s office.”

They thanked her and went to the elevator. Inside, Starsky grabbed Hutch’s arm. “What if the sheriff is on the payroll of the killer bunch?” he suddenly asked, breathless at the thought.

“I don’t think he is.” Hutch said reassuringly but felt his stomach clench again.

“But you’re not sure.”

“No,” Hutch had to admit when they stopped at the third floor and the doors opened, “but it seems to me that they won’t come near an officer of the law of any kind.”

“I hope so.” Starsky muttered, not convinced by Hutch’s theory.

Hutch knocked on the door and almost fell inside the room when the door was thrown open. A huge man with dark hair and an enormous moustache stood before them. His brown eyes looked at them suspiciously when he thundered, “What the hell are two of Bay City’s finest doing here? Don’t tell me you wise guys need help from a simple sheriff.”

“Um,” Starsky said.

“Um,” Hutch said.

“Well?”

“Um…can’t we come in,” Hutch had found his voice first, “It’s rather complicated and we don’t want everybody to hear this.”

“I don’t have secrets for my fellow officers.” The sheriff’s voice bellowed through the hall.

“But we have,” Starsky’s voice sounded as a whisper in comparison to the sheriff’s.

“Well…if you have to, come in.”

Hutch stepped inside the office with Starsky on his heels. It was a nice office with a huge desk in it.

Of course, Starsky thought, a giant like him can hardly sit behind a normal sized desk.

Wow, Hutch thought, Dobey would be so jealous if he saw this.

The sheriff sat down in his equally huge chair and waved his enormous hand through the air, “Take a seat, make yourselves at home.” He laughed with a loud, rumbling noise and Starsky wished he could make himself invisible for a while. The sheriff got on his nerves with his loud voice and slightly unfriendly attitude.

Both men sat down in normal sized chairs that turned out to be as uncomfortable as the chairs in every ER in any hospital they’d ever been.

Even Hutch had to control himself to not run away and hide but his common sense told him to stay where he was and to try to find out what this strange sheriff knew.

He cleared his throat and started carefully, searching for the right words. He didn’t want to tell everything; just that they were looking for Faith Goodbody and consorts.

When he’d finished talking the big man looked at his two visitors with a (Starsky thought) devious smile on his face.

“So, you two come all the way from Bay City to look for a woman. Don’t you have computers down there?” he grinned and again Starsky thought it was a surreptitious smile.

“Sure we have but we found nothing about her.” Hutch answered, feeling more and more uncomfortable.

“Couldn’t it be that there is nothing to tell?” the sheriff asked, a treacherous look in his eyes   (again, Starsky’s thoughts).

Hutch shifted in his chair. “Could be,” he said, “but we have indications that she might be in to something nasty and we’d like to know…well…how trustworthy she is.”

The sheriff leaned back, resting his head against the backside of his chair. It looked as if he was thinking but within a minute a loud snoring disturbed the uncomfortable silence.

“What the hell…?” Starsky whispered and looked at Hutch.

“Our friendly sheriff must have had a bad night.” Hutch grinned, “I think his wife kept him awake too long and I don’t think it was for pleasant reasons.”

“That’s just terrific,” Starsky couldn’t believe it, “I’m gonna wake him up.”

 “No, no, no,” Hutch hurried to say, “Let him sleep. Who knows what’ll happen when we wake him up.”

“We can’t wait here till he wakes up.” Starsky protested.

“No, we’re gonna ask the friendly lady if there’s someone else who can help us.”

They left the office on tiptoes, afraid to disturb the sleeping man, and hurried back to the elevator.

 

********

A grouchy older man had replaced the friendly woman at the front desk. He looked up from the comic book he was reading and asked unfriendly, “What is it?”

Hutch thought for a second and decided he didn’t like nor trusted the man.

“Hm, we have a crime to report.”

“A crime uh? And what is the nature of this crime?”

“Blackmail,” Starsky chimed in, “Where can we find the person who can help us with this?”

The officer narrowed his eyes, then shrugged. “Second floor. Go to room two four one; you’ll find the deputies there.”

“Thank you,” Hutch said friendly and they returned to the elevator.

“Blackmail? How did you come up with that so fast?”

“I don’t know,” Starsky grinned, “but when you think of it, it is kinda blackmail isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Hutch answered when they entered the elevator, “but it’s more than just blackmail.”

“Hey, blackmail is one of the lowest things in my opinion.”

“It is, but in this case it’s your life that’s being threatened and that’s lower than anything I know.”

Starsky looked at his friend while they went up to the second floor. “That’s a nice thing to say Hutch.”

Hutch blushed, “It’s true, anybody who is after you is the lowest of the lowest in my book.”

Starsky smiled when the doors opened, “Same here Hutch.”

The second floor turned out to be a copy of the third with one difference, there were far more people walking around and a bench was occupied with what seemed to be arrestees of all kind.

“Feels like home.” Starsky whispered.

“Yeah, nothing like a hall full of lowlife to make you feel home again.”

They worked their way through the throng of people that were gong in and out of several rooms and they made it to room two four one. Hutch opened the door when a telephone started to ring.

“Don’t answer it.” Starsky quipped.

Just like the sheriff’s office it was a brightly lit room but it was filled with several desks half the size of the sheriff’s and most of them were occupied with men and women making phone calls or questioning people.

Nobody looked at the two friends when they entered the office and Starsky had the feeling nobody noticed them.

“Are they really busy or are they just pretending?” he asked Hutch.

“Of course they’re busy. How many times do you actually see people come into the squad room?”

“All the time! I always know when somebody comes in.”

Hutch knew it was true; Starsky always seemed to ‘feel’ when people entered their squad room. Not so strange, he thought, since he always lets me write the reports. What else can he do than look around and notice everything that happens there.

He followed Starsky who was making his way to one of the desks.

“Is there anyone available to help two law abiding citizens?” he heard his partner ask and cringed at the sarcasm in Starsky’s voice. Oh boy, he’s really pissed off, time to take over.

“We need help,” he hurried to say, “but it’s a delicate subject so, if you don’t mind, we’d rather discuss this in private.”

While he was talking, he showed the deputy behind the desk his badge.

“Ah fellow officers, I see.” The deputy stood up from his chair and shook their hands. “Let’s get somewhere more private,” he said, “then we can talk.”

He led them to another room and shoved the sign “occupied” on the door in place.

“We won’t be disturbed now,” he said and opened the door,“ come in and sit down.”

The room was much smaller than the squad room and had only one window. The chairs were the same uncomfortable ones like the chairs in the sheriff’s office. They sat down and the Las Vegas detective introduced himself as Martin Martinson. “My parents thought it would be easier for me not to forget my name.” He added.

“Forget your name?” Starsky repeated with disbelief, “Who in the hell would ever forget his name?”

“Beats me,” Martinson shrugged, “they never were able to explain that to me either.”

“Can we get to the matter of this cosy meeting?” Hutch asked, getting a little impatient.

“Oh yes, of course,” Martinson looked at his two visitors expectantly, “What can I do for you?”

“My partner and I are looking for a woman named Faith Goodbody and we were told she lives here, in Las Vegas,” Hutch started, “And we wonder if there is some information you can share with us.”

“Why? I mean, why are you looking for Faith?”

“Um, well….that’s hard to explain without going into details,” Hutch hesitated, “It’s a bit weird but…um….well…to be honest, she’s after my partner here and we have reason to believe she’s been after him before and has harmed him severely.”

Martinson looked at Hutch as if he was from another planet. “You mean that sweet Faith is a criminal? Faith?”

“Sweet Faith?” they said in unison and stared at the detective opposite them, “You know her?” Starsky asked afraid for the answer.

“Sure, I know her. She’s a good friend of my sister.”

 

There was an awkward silence after Martinson’s words. Starsky and Hutch looked at each other in bafflement until Hutch broke the silence, “Your sister?”

“That’s right, my sister and Faith have been best friends for a long time now. So you will understand that I’m not going to believe a word you said. It must be a mistake, a case of mistaken identity perhaps?”

“What…what is your sisters name?” Hutch asked hesitantly.

“Honey and she lives in Boston.”

“Honey.” Both men sighed in relief.

“Is there anything more I can do for you?”

Hutch shook his head. “No thank you. We know enough. It was all a mistake just like you said.”

They said goodbye, left the room, went down with the elevator and left the building.

Hutch was almost running when they got outside and Starsky had trouble keeping up with him.

“What’s the matter Hutch? Why are you running?”

Hutch had reached the car and opened the door. “Get in,” he said, looking back at the building, “Hurry, we have to get away from here as fast as we can.”

Starsky stared at him dumbfounded. “What’s wrong?”

“Get in the car Starsk, now!”

Starsky climbed in the car still not understanding what was wrong with his friend. Hutch jumped in and started the engine. “He’s in on it buddy.”

“Huh? Who’s in on it?”

Hutch drove away from the curb and eased the car into the increasing traffic. “Martinson is in on it.”

“Why? How do you know?”

Hutch checked the rear view mirror. “I don’t think we are being followed.”

Starsky stared at him again. “What’s wrong with you? Who would wanna follow us? Could you please explain what’s wrong now?” Starsky almost shouted the last words.

Still checking the mirrors for cars that might be following them, Hutch explained, “Honey is from Boston.”

“Yeah so?”

“You remember Hug telling us about their leader from Boston?”

“Yeah, well he told you.”

“Right, but I told you, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, but I still don’t see what…oh.”

“Yes oh.”

“But you told me her name is Grace!”

“Did I tell you that? Can’t remember I did.”

“Yes you did, I just can’t remember when though.”

“No, me neither. Are you sure I told you?”

“Hey, I’m not senile. Of course I’m sure.”

“It’s not important when I told you.”

“No it isn’t. You care to tell me why we’re running?”

“It’s too obvious to be a coincidence. Don’t you see? Honey is Faith’s best friend and she lives in Boston. So does Grace remember?”

“You think Grace and Honey are the same person?”

Hutch nodded. “Don’t you?”

“No…yes, but I don’t want Grace to be Honey.”

“I know what you mean Starsk, but if she is we’re in deep trouble.”

“You mean in deeper trouble than we already are. But you’re right, if she is then her brother will be on the phone right now and the killer bunch’ll know we’re here.”

“Yeah, so we’re gonna stake the house out. We gotta find out how many lunatic women are in the group.”

Starsky shuddered. “I still don’t get why they’re after me. I mean, what’s so special about me that they wanna hurt me instead of anything else?”

“Like what?”

“Oh…like …I don’t know. I wish I knew what’s going on in their minds. Do you have any idea what’s going on in their minds?”

“No I don’t, but I intend to find out somehow.”

“I’m not sure I wanna find out Hutch, who knows what ridiculous reasons they have for torturing me.”

“I think it’s always better to know, knowledge is the gate to answers.”

“Hey, I like that. ‘Knowledge is the gate to answers.’ Sounds cool.”

“I know. Now let’s see where Faith lives. I don’t think we were followed so it’s quite safe to stop here and look for the address. I wrote it down, it’s in one of my pockets I guess.”

Hutch parked the car near the curb and started fumbling in his jacket pocket.

“It’s getting dark. You think we’re too late already to see what’s going on at Faith’s?”

Hutch didn’t answer but looked at a folded piece of paper in his hand. “This must be it.”

“Where is it?” Starsky asked, forgetting about the darkness.

“It’s here in my hand.”

“No, I mean where does Faith live.”

“Oh, let’s see. Hm, Something Street. Can’t read it too well, it’s getting dark.”

“That’s what I just said.”

“You did? Sorry, didn’t hear you.”

Starsky mumbled something that didn’t sound very friendly but soon his curiosity took over.

“We gotta find the place, Hutch. Who knows what the ladies of horror come up with this time?”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll try to find someone who can tell us where it is.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“About what?”

“Asking a stranger about Faith?”

“Starsky, everybody here is a stranger to us. We have no other choice.”

“I don’t know Hutch. I mean what if they’re connected to Faith and her killer group? It’s my life that’s at stake here.”

“Your life and my sanity Starsk.”

“That’s what I mean.”

“Okay, we’ll find a better lit place so I can read the note and then we’ll drive around to look for it.”

“Why don’t you use the car light?”

“Doesn’t work.”

“It’s a conspiracy I tell you.”

“Let’s hope not buddy, let’s hope not.”

 

 

“Wow,” Starsky said, “this is some fine neighbourhood.”

“Not bad,” Hutch agreed, looking at the house where Faith lived. They’d found the place without anybody’s help by just driving around the streets of Las Vegas near the desert.

“Nothing’s happening here, as far as I can see.”               

“Maybe they know we’re on to them and decided to stop their torturing.” Starsky found that idea very appealing but Hutch wasn’t as optimistic as his friend.

 “I don’t think they’ll give up anything Starsk, they’re just being very careful.”

“I hate women!”

“No you don’t, you just don’t like women like Faith and her group of torturing witches.”

“You can say that again.”

“We should call Dobey, don’t you think? He doesn’t know what we’re doing and I don’t think he likes to be kept in the dark.”

“He can wait.”

“What’s the problem with giving him a call to tell him that we’re all right; it’ll make him sleep better.”

“What do I care about Dobey sleeping better when I won’t get any sleep at all.”

“Starsky don’t be so selfish. There’s a phone booth over there. It won’t take you a minute.”

“Me? You want me to call Dobey? Why don’t you call him yourself?”

“I have to watch your back buddy and I can’t do that when I’m on the phone.”

“I’m not going outside, in the dark, to make a phone call across the house where the queens of torture are having a meeting.”

Hutch sighed knowing Starsky wouldn’t set a foot outside the car. “Okay, I’ll make the call. Keep the car locked and don’t open it for anybody. Especially not if it’s a female.”

Starsky snorted in disgust, “You think I’m brain dead, don’t you?”

“No not brain dead but a little careless sometimes.”

“I’m not careless,” Starsky snapped.

“You are,” Hutch said, opening the door.

“Am not.”

“And you’re acting like a five year old.”

Starsky stuck his tongue out in Hutch’s direction and said nothing.

“Yep,” Hutch nodded, “A five year old.”

Laughing he closed the door and looked around. There was nobody in sight, but because it was dark he could not be absolutely sure. He waited a few moments to listen but besides the sound of traffic in the distance there was no sound to be heard.

Quiet street, there’s hardly any traffic. Maybe I should stay here in case the wicked gals are ready to strike right now.

He hesitated between getting back in the car and making the phone call but then decided it wouldn’t take a minute to call and a minute couldn’t be long enough for Starsky to get into trouble.

The moment he entered the phone booth a nice looking woman passed by and suddenly Hutch felt the hairs in the back of his neck stand up. He watched her walk towards the car, her blond curls dancing around her shoulders. The woman walked slower when she neared the car and Hutch was out of the booth already when she picked up speed and walked past it, without looking at it. Hutch sighed in relief and turned back to make his phone call. After he’d talked with Dobey and had reassured their boss he hurried back to the car. He found Starsky with his gun in his hand and fear on his face.

“Did you see her?” was the first thing he asked, “You think it was her?”

“Yes I saw her but I don’t know who she is. Did you see where she went?”

Hutch slid behind the wheel and tried to get rid of the feeling of impending doom.

Starsky shook his head. “I didn’t dare look at her,” he confessed, “but I had a very nasty feeling when she walked by.”

“So did I for some reason. I wonder if she is one of them.”

“She could have walked by to see if we’re alone I guess. That means, she’s gone inside to report the others now.”

“Maybe we should take a look ourselves. You think you’re up to going to the house and seeing what we can find out?”

Starsky shuddered at the thought but waiting in the car for who knows how long wasn’t very appealing either. He took a deep breath and opened the door. “Let’s do it. I don’t wanna sit here the entire night not knowing what’s going on.”

Hutch nodded, his eyes fixed on the house across the street. “Come on then, time to face the music.”

“You make it sound like a party.” Starsky complained leaving the car. “Could as well be my funeral, you know.”

“I’ll protect you Starsk, you know that.”

“You’d better pal, or this will be the end of a beautiful friendship.”

“Don’t say that,” Hutch begged, “I can’t even imagine life without you in it.”

“Sorry,” Starsky mumbled, fear crawling through his body, “but I’m so damn afraid.”

Walking close together they crossed the street and approached the house where they suspected their nemesis having a meeting with her accomplices.

 

 

“Shit, they closed the curtains,” Starsky whispered, hiding behind Hutch.

“That was to be expected,” Hutch whispered back, “they’re a clever bunch.”

“Which room are they?”

“Maybe they’re in the basement.”

“The basement?” Starsky squeaked, “Why would they be in the basement?…Oh shit, that’s where it all happens isn’t it?”

Hutch nodded. “Sounds logical to me. I should have asked Huggy if he knew anything about a basement.”

They retreated from the house and hid behind a tree in the garden, their eyes glued to the friendly looking house. Nothing moved and the house looked inviting with all the lights turned on, the soft glow shining through the closed curtains.

“I can’t believe this is the hiding place of criminals.” Starsky said, “It looks so nice.”

“Yes it does doesn’t it? But it is the right place, I read the name on the mailbox.”

A cab stopped in front of the house and a slender woman got out. The two friends couldn’t see her face or hair colour because it was too dark but when the woman had paid the cab driver and turned to enter the garden, they could see a little more of her.

Starsky shuddered again. “Man, she looks mean.”

“Well, I think she’s looking good.” Hutch said, “Pretty lady if you ask me.”

“I don’t ask you and she looks mean to me.” Starsky whispered too loud.

The woman stood still and looked around. The two men tried to make themselves invisible behind the tree in the dark. The woman shrugged and walked to the door. She rapped on the door three times waited two seconds and rapped again twice. The woman they had seen earlier that evening walking past their car opened the door.

“It’s her,” Starsky uttered, panic in his voice, “It’s her Hutch, they know we’re here.”

He grabbed Hutch’s arm and clung to it desperately. “What now, what are we gonna do now uh?”

“Shhhh,” Hutch hissed, “be quiet. They don’t know we’re in the garden, so be quiet.”

“They seem to know everything. They probably know we’re in the garden anyway.”

The two women stood side by side talking softly and looking around. Hutch had the feeling they were made already and the thoughts ran through his mind feverishly.

His terrified partner didn’t help him to concentrate so he waited and watched the women, trying to find out what they were up to.

To his relief he saw them go inside and close the door. “They’re inside Starsk.”

“They are?”

“Yeah, weren’t you paying attention?”

“No, I wasn’t.”

“Great cop you are.” Hutch snarled.

It was too dark behind the tree to see Starsky’s face but Hutch could feel his angry eyes in the back of his head.

“Easy for you to say,” Starsky mumbled, “You’re not the one they’re after.”

“I don’t understand it buddy, normally you’re not afraid of the biggest felon on earth but now…”

“Yeah well,” Starsky answered, “this are women Hutch, women. I know what to expect when I’m after some flake but this is something else you know. This is a female killer gang and they’re so unpredictable like…like…women.”

Hutch chuckled despite the situation they were in. “You usually know what to do with women Gordo, seeing you like this is new to me.”

“It’s not funny! It would be a lot easier if they were after me for just sex but they want my body for another reason and I don’t like that one bit.”

“Me neither,” Hutch was serious again, “We got to find a way to get inside without the gals noticing anything. Come on, we’re going around the house. Maybe they left a window open.”

“I’m not going to break in. Not this time, not with the killer ladies inside.”

“We can’t stay here all night Starsk. We got to do something about this situation.”

“You go in then and I’ll wait till you come back.”

“No way Jose, I won’t let you out of my sight for a second. That’s about all the time you need to get into trouble.”

“Very funny Hutchinson.”

“Are you ready for some action?”

“If I have to…I guess I am.”

“Good. Follow me.”

Carefully they left their hiding place and tiptoed towards the house. No sound was heard and Starsky held his breath when they reached one of the windows. He grabbed Hutch’s arm again as if afraid to get separated from his friend on enemy territory. Hutch listened at the window and shook his head. “I can’t hear anybody or anything here. Wrong room.”

They sneaked their way through the garden until they reached the back of the house. It was much darker there and it took some time for their eyes to get used at the sparsely lit surroundings. After a few minutes they could see enough to understand that this wasn’t the place to get into the house. Hutch turned to Starsky who was still holding his arm. “We got to get back to the front.” He whispered. The moon gave enough light for Hutch to see the panic in his friend’s eyes. In a gesture of reassurance he squeezed Starsky’s hand that held his arm. “It’s gonna be all right partner.”

Just when they turned to go back to the front yard they heard voices, muffled as if in the distance, and they both froze to the spot.

Starsky tried to hide behind Hutch completely when the voices became stronger and two women came in sight. They were chattering but the friends couldn’t hear what they were saying at first. Realising they were in plain sight, Hutch tried to ease backwards but Starsky was too frozen with fear and Hutch bumped into him stepping on his toes again.

“Ouch!” The startled cry made the two women look their way and they both knew there was no way to escape them now.

“Hey!” one of the women yelled, “What is this? Who are you?”

The front door swung open and the two other women ran out. “Siobhan, Hope, everything okay?” asked the blond woman.

“We have two prowlers here,” one of them answered in a lovely Irish accent, “And if I’m not mistaking, it’s our two favourite men.” She laughed happily but to the two cops it was an evil sound.

“You mean we got our heroes here, in my garden?” Faith asked, hardly breathing in excitement, “Oh man, this is great! Who would have thought that, uh?”

She looked at the woman next to her. “Grace, now we can try out what we’ve been thinking about.”

The four women started to walk towards the two friends who were both paralyzed with fear.

Hutch was the first to regain his wits, “Um, ladies, no matter how much I enjoy you liking us, I think we need to talk about this.”

“Yes,” Starsky said from behind Hutch, “you’d better listen to him. He’s got something important to tell you.”

“Ooohh, it’s Curly,” Siobhan cooed, “Come here sweetie and let me have a look at you.”

“Wait a minute Siobhan, he’s not exclusively yours.” Grace chimed in, lovingly stroking the whip she held in her hands, “Come on Curly honey, we all want to see you in the flesh. Come on now baby, we’ve been dying to meet you.”

“Oh yeah, let us take a good look at you honey,” Hope begged, “I’ve come all the way from Alaska so I think I deserve an eyeful of you.”

“Can’t you just take a look at Hutch and be happy with that?” Starsky tried, still hiding behind Hutch’s back.

“Fat chance lover,” Grace chuckled, “We want you and you alone. Come on inside with us.”

“No thanks, we gotta go.” Hutch said, knowing they had no chance to get away.

The whip cracked and both men jumped in surprise. “Okay, okay, we’re going with you. Keep the whip down please.” Hutch said taking a few steps towards the open door.

“No! I’m not going in. No way!” Starsky yelled, “You can go to hell, ladies of torture.”

The four women weren’t in the least taken aback by his outburst.

“Isn’t he brave?” Faith purred, her knees turning into jelly, “Gosh, I love him.”

“No swooning here, Faith.” Grace commended, “We got no time for that now. And you Curly, inside!”

“Yes ma’am,” Starsky whispered and took a step forward.

“I’m coming with him. I’m not leaving him on his own with you witches.”

“Sure you can come in Blondie; we wouldn’t want it any other way.” Grace grinned, “Ain’t that the truth girls?”

Enthusiastic nodding was her answer and slowly Hutch walked past Grace. Starsky followed him even slower, terror evident on his face.

“That’s it boys, nice and easy. Come on gals, we can’t let them out of our sight now can we?”

A chorus of voices answered. “No, oh no, we got to keep our eyes on them beauties.”

Knowing there was no way to get out of this right now the two friends entered the house, their four curses following on their heels.

Despite the trouble they were in, the two men couldn’t hold back their surprise when they entered a beautiful kitchen.

“Wow,” Hutch said, “I’ve never seen a kitchen like this before. Think of all the wonderful stuff I could cook in a kitchen this beautiful.”

“Yeah, like more health shakes and disiccated liver.” Starsky muttered.

“It’s desiccated!”  Four women’s voices corrected him.

“Disiccated, desiccated, who cares,”

“See Starsk, I always said you ought to pay more attention when I tell you something. These lovely ladies know what is healthy, don’t you my dears?”

“Stop sweet talking Blondie,” Grace snapped, “you’re only here because you two are a package deal. Our sweetheart would never come here on his own, so be glad we didn’t get rid of you right away.”

“Hey!” Siobhan said, “Nothing is gonna happen to Hutch, Grace. I happen to like him too you know.”

“You always were different from us Siobhan, and this proves it.”

“Is it all right if we sit down?” Hutch was getting tired of the arguing ladies.

“Yes, take a seat. You want coffee?” Faith smiled.

“Yes please, black no sugar.” Hutch answered.

“And you hon?” Hope asked Starsky, “coffee with all the goodies uh?”

“Um, yes please.”

Two minutes later they were sitting at the kitchen table enjoying a cup of coffee. Except for Siobhan, who preferred tea.

Isn’t this nice?” Faith asked, obvious enjoying the get together.

“Sure is.” Starsky agreed out loud but still feeling the fear inside.

 

Four eager women started at Starsky while he was drinking his coffee. It made him nervous like nothing else ever had.

“What do you want from me?” he finally dared to ask, “Why are you so obsessed with the idea that it’s fun hurting me?”

“Don’t Starsk,” Hutch whispered, “maybe they’ll forget about it.”

Starsky looked at him frowning. “You got a lot to learn about women partner,” he said, “these four loonies ain’t gonna forget anything.”

“Who are you calling loonies?” Grace asked, a dangerous edge in her voice.

“You my dear, you four are the loonies here.” Starsky straightened his back, “Why else…?”

“You want to see the rest of the house?” Faith interfered, “I’m sure you’re gonna like it.”

“Hey!” Grace yelled, “No time for pleasantries. We’ve got work to do.”

Ah, the ladies are divided! Hutch thought, maybe I can use that and get us out of here in one piece after all.

“I’d love to see this place, Faith,” he said out loud, “And I’m sure Starsk can’t wait to see your bedroom.”

Faith smiled a beaming smile but that disappeared the moment she heard the whip crack again.

Hutch noticed Siobhan and Hope shrink back in their chairs just like Faith. So, you’re the boss here aren’t you Grace? Good to know whom I have to take out first.

Grace’s voice had an evil tone when she said, “You know what we have in mind for our Curly here, so don’t get sidetracked by Blondie. We all know he’s a smooth talker, don’t we?”

The other three nodded, their eyes glued on Starsky who started to feel very uncomfortable under their hungry stares.

 “Hm,” Hutch tried, “Can I ask a question?””

“Of course you can honey.” Siobhan’s voice was almost tender which earned her an angry look from Grace.

“I’m dying to know why you’re doing what you’re doing.”

“Dying to know uh?” Grace cackled.

“Oh, stupid word choice.” Hutch stuttered.

Grace grinned evilly at him and started to explain, “It’s very simple actually,” she said, stroking her whip lovingly, “We all love your partner so much that we need to hurt him in order to get you to comfort him. There’s so much satisfaction in the comfort you give him.”

The men looked at her with open mouths. “You mean…you want me to comfort my partner?”

“Sure,” Grace said, “that’s what we aim for, that’s why we hurt him.”

“Are you nuts?” Starsky bellowed, “ Are you all freakin’ nuts?”

“Uh uh,” Grace hushed, waving the whip playfully in front of his face, “Calm down now, you can get angry later tonight for a better reason.”

“You…” Starsky fumed, “you’re completely mad, do you know that?”

She nodded, “Yes, I know and I like it.”

Hope thought it was about time to say something to distract Grace from her evil plans. Not that she minded participating in the plans to torture Starsky but now he was here in the flesh, she wanted to talk with him a little longer.

“Do you know,” she started, looking sideways to Grace, “that Grace and Siobhan like slash?”

“Hope!” Grace warned, “Stop that.”

“What is slash?” Hutch had never heard the word before and a look at Starsky’s face told him he had neither.

Siobhan coughed a nervous cough. “Hope honey, you think it’s wise to tell them that?”

Faith’s face had turned bright red. “I have nothing to do with that,” she said, “that’s not my style.”

“You like to read it,” Grace said accusingly, “you’re just too chicken to write it.”

“What is ‘slash’?” Hutch hollered.

“Oh yes, slash,” Hope chuckled uncomfortably, “maybe Siobhan can explain that better to you.”

“Well,” Siobhan drawled, blushing a lovely shade of pink, “Slash is…um…well…man to man sex.”

“What!” Starsky jumped to his feet, making the chair fall with a crash, “You mean..g…g…gay?”

Hutch said nothing; he just stared at Siobhan with his mouth open, the thoughts racing through his mind. Sex with Starsky? SEX with STARSKY?

“Hutch,” he heard his friend yell, “say something, don’t just sit there with your mouth open!”

“Wha…what do you want me to say?”

“You heard them, didn’t you?” Starsky said exasperated, “they want us to…you know.”

Hutch nodded, his mind numb, “I heard.”

“Well?”

Hutch looked at Grace who smiled a victorious smile. It made her look very dangerous in Hutch’s eyes.

“What do you want me to say Starsk?”

“Don’t keep asking me that! I don’t know what I want you to say. Don’t you have anything to say?”

Hutch shrugged. “I’d say it’s the least painful thing they can do to us.” He ducked his head a little when he saw Starsky’s face first turn red then go awfully pale.

“You’re not gonna faint are you buddy?” he asked in a soothing voice that made the four spectators go goose bumpy all over.

“Oh man,” Faith sighed delighted, “this is the real stuff. It’s awesome.”

“Hutch,” Starsky stammered, “Am I dreaming?”

“I wish you were buddy.” Hutch looked at the women who were visibly enjoying the scene.

“I think…I’m gonna be sick.”

“Come on Starsk, sit down before you fall flat on your face.” Hutch picked up the chair and gently pushed Starsky on it. Still holding his friend by the arm to prevent him from falling off the chair he turned to the women, his eyes shooting daggers. “Now see what you’ve done!” he said in a dangerously low voice, “Are you happy now?”

Four heads nodded vigorously. “It’s fantastic!” said Faith her eyes sparkling, “It’s so much better to see it really happen than writing it down.”

“Yeah, ”Siobhan sighed, “It’s like a dream come true.”

Hutch took a chair and placed it besides Starsky’s. “Listen ladies,” he said firmly, his hand still on his friend’s arm, “it’s time we should sort this out, don’t you think?”

They looked at him with not understanding eyes and Hutch sighed. “Look, we came here because we heard that Faith had sinister plans after she had an accident. By the way, how are you doing now Faith?”

“Oh, never been better.” Faith answered, her eyes still glued on Starsky’s pale face.

“You care to tell me what happened, honey?” Hutch tried to get her attention away from his partner.

“I can’t remember,” she said hardly hearing the question.

“She…um…she had a car accident,” Siobhan said, “kind of anyway.”

“Yes,” Hope added, “Six broken ribs and a collapsed lung.”

“That’s right,” Grace chimed in, an evil look on her face, “And she wants Starsky to suffer that too. Like a kind of therapy you know, in order to deal with her horrible experience.”

“It was terrible when they put that tube in my chest,” Faith whined, “I need to get it out of my system or I’ll go mad.”

“And you think having my partner here undergoing the same treatment will make you feel better?”

She nodded enthusiastically, “I’m sure of it. Especially when you’re with him to help him through it.”

“Hm,” Hutch looked at Starsky who hadn’t uttered a sound, “What do you think about all this pal?”

“I wanna go home,” was all Starsky said.

“Well ladies of doom, there is your answer, we’re going home.”

The whip cracked with a vicious sound and the two men jumped up in surprise. Grace’s look was enough to make them sit down again and she laughed a cackling laugh.

“No way you two are going home,” she barked, “First we wanna have some fun with you.”

“You better listen to her,” Hope whispered, “She’s not someone to fool around with.”

“She makes us do all these terrible things,” Faith confessed. She obviously felt more courageous with the two men around. “She really knows how to use that whip.”

“Soooo,” Hutch stretched the word and made it sound like a threat, “You’re the one behind this all. Are you behind the…um…slash thing too?”

Grace wasn’t the least impressed by him. “Yep,” she grinned like a Cheshire cat, “I really love hot man to man sex!”

Starsky groaned in misery at those words but Hutch seemed not so uncomfortable. “May I ask you why?” he asked politely.

That question surprised her and for a moment she just stared at him. Hutch grinned inwardly giving himself mental thumbs up. Now I’ve got you, you crazy creep.

But Grace wasn’t the kind of woman that wouldn’t react to a challenge and with a sappy grin she said, “Because it’s hot!”

Oh boy, this is gonna be tough.

“Does that mean, you don’t get enough yourself?”  he asked with a leer.

That made her furious and with a flick of the wrist she made the whip crack several times. They all felt the torture weapon pass them but nobody was hit by it.

“Next time you come up with a question like that your friend is gonna regret it.”

“Ooohh,” Faith clapped her hands, “that’s just like ‘Holier than Thou.’ You remember that Grace?”

“Sure do hon, sure do.”

“Holier than Thou?” Hutch asked, not knowing what the hell they were talking about.

“Yes, with Big Tony in it, don’t you remember Big Tony?”

Starsky moaned and tried to hide under the table.

Hutch went pale remembering Big Tony. “I do remember him,” he said almost inaudibly, “So that was you too, uh?”

Grace beamed, pride evident on her face. “Yup Blondie, that was us. So remember who you’re talking to the next time you wanna add a smart remark.”

“What else have you been responsible for?”

“Are you sure you wanna know?” Grace asked having a grand old time.

“No, but tell me anyhow.” Hutch looked at his partner who seemed to have withdrawn from his surroundings. His eyes were staring into nothing and he didn’t react to anything that was said after the mentioning of Big Tony. Maybe it’s better this way. I’m not sure he can deal with this shit right now.

“To be honest,” Grace said, “I’m actually a real fan of rape stories.”

“WHAT?” Hutch thought he might faint while Starsky slid off his chair and ended up under the table.

“Rape,” she said again enjoying her self, seeing the devastation on Hutch’s face. ”It somehow gives me a feeling of power. Like a rapist having power over his victim.”

“That makes you a rapist,” Hutch answered desperately searching for a way out, “Isn’t this slash thing enough for you?”

“Well, it’s fun but I need more. I need more hurt and slash is often too soft for me.”

“Lady, Cabrillo is waiting for you, straightjacket and all.”

“Let them wait, I ain’t planning on getting caught you know.” Grace shrugged and looked at her accomplices. “You know I won’t get caught don’t you, my little writers?”

The three women didn’t look at her when they nodded their heads.

“Hey!” Grace snapped, “Lost your tongue?”

“No..no..no.” Three frightened voices stammered. “You won’t get caught,” Siobhan said, “I’m sure you won’t, you’re way too clever.”

“You got that right,” Grace sneered.

A pitiful sound came from under the table and Hutch dropped on his knees to see what had happened to Starsky. He found his friend lying in a foetus position with his eyes tightly closed.

“Come on buddy,” he said softly, trying to hide the concern from his voice, “Let’s get you back in your chair again uh?”

But Starsky didn’t want to face the women and fought against Hutch’s helping hands. “I wanna die Hutch, please let me die in peace here.”

“Can’t do that Starsk, you know that I need you too much.”

“Ooohh,” Hope moaned in pleasure, “this is soooo slash!”

Hutch jumped on his feet, bumping his head against the table, “This is no slash idiot, it’s called friendship. But I guess you never heard of that, have you?”

Hope blushed, down casting her eyes. “Of course I know what friendship is,” she muttered, “I’m here amongst friends.”

“Yeah? You could have fooled me,” Hutch spat in anger, “It ain’t no friendship between you, it’s…it’s…insanity!”

“You’re playing with fire Blondie,” Grace said, stroking the whip in her hands, “You know what I said before, don’t you?”

“I’ve had it with you and your whip lady! You turn my partner into a pile of mush just for the fun of it and I have to tell you, I’m really pissed off by it.”

“Wow, the big blond is getting angry,” Grace smiled, a hint of admiration in her eyes, “That’s gonna make this all the more fun, don’t you think my little slaves?”

This time the three other women didn’t say anything. They refused to look in Grace’s direction and kept their eyes on Hutch, drawing strength from him.

The whip cracked with a vicious sound and they jumped in fear but kept their mouths shut and their eyes on the blond cop.

Now it’s time to deal with the wicked one, Hutch thought with satisfaction, I have three women on my side and Starsky .Starsky! Hutch ducked under the table again and grabbed his friend by the arm. “Time to wake up Starsk, it’s time for action.” He whispered, hoping Starsky would hear him and understand it was time to end this nightmare. To his relief Starsky looked at him and made an attempt to get up, bumping his head in the process. “Damn!”

“Sh, don’t let them hear that you’re back buddy.”

“Isn’t that a little late? They must have heard me bumping my head.” Starsky whispered back.

“Well well, isn’t that our sexy Curly returning to us?”

Hutch looked up to see Grace standing next to him. “Leave him alone Grace,” he said, getting back on his feet, “the party is over you devilish woman.”  His right hand shot forwards to get a hold of the whip but Grace seemed to have read his mind and laughing she stepped backwards, the whip tauntingly waving in front of his face.

“Not a chance Blondie, don’t think you can get me or my whip. Don’t you know by now that I’m the director here?”

“Listen to her Hutch,” Siobhan whispered, “she always seems to know what we think too.”

“And what do you think Siobhan?” Hutch’s voice was friendly and the Irish girl blushed.

“Um…well…I don’t think I can say that.” She said, her eyes fixed on Grace.

“Oh, tell him Siobhan, you know I already know what you’re gonna say.”

Faith stepped forward and slung an arm around Siobhan’s shoulder. “Tell him sweetie,” she encouraged, “maybe this is the time to get free from Grace finally.”

“Yeah Siobhan, tell him about the basement and how we’re forced to write what she wants.” Hope had found enough courage to participate in the resistance against Grace.

From under the table appeared a dark, curly head and Starsky asked softly, “You think it’s safe for me to come out from under here Hutch?”

A chorus of four voices answered the question, “Yes, come on Starsk, it’s safe now.”

One voice answered at the same time, “No, but come out anyway.”

Slowly the rest of Starsky appeared from under the table. The women stared at him as if he was from outer space and Starsky felt a blush creep up from his neck. “What?” he asked, “Why are you staring at me like that?”

“Your eyes,” Hope sighed, “They’re so gorgeous.”

“Yes,” Faith agreed, “I never know where to look first. Your eyes or your…um…crotch.”

“Or,” Siobhan added, “your ass.”

“Ooohh,” four female voices moaned, “That ass, it’s perfect!”

Starsky’s face was bright red and he folded his hands in front of his crotch to protect his privates from the hungry looks.

“It’s your own fault,” Faith told him, “The jeans you’re wearing reveal everything, you know.”

Starsky made a pathetic sound and tried to disappear under the table again.

“Do you know there is a ‘Curly Butt Appreciation Society’?” Siobhan asked.

“I gotta sit down,” Hope crowed and sat down in a chair, her eyes still fixed on the disappearing Starsky.

Grace cracked her whip and everybody paid attention to her, except Starsky who was hiding under the table again.

“Enough!” Grace’s voice yelled, “It’s time for some serious business now.”

“Wait a minute,” Hutch said, “tell me more about that Butt Society.”

“Why, you’re interested in joining the club Blondie?” Grace asked with a leer.

Now it was Hutch’s turn to blush but he held her gaze. “Maybe I am.”

“Slash, slash!” Hope cheered, shifting enthusiastically in her chair.

“Now that you mention it, tell me more about the famous slash thing.” That’ll keep them busy for a while.

The other three women sat down too and stared at Hutch expectantly.

“What do you want to know?” Grace asked, for the moment forgotten what she had in mind for Starsky.

“Everything,” Hutch answered, “I know nothing about it.”

“Okay,” Grace started taking the lead without even looking at her accomplices, “Slash is male love. Two men in love and having sex.”

“That’s all?” Hutch was surprised that he didn’t feel more repulsed at the thought.

Grace grinned evilly. “No Blondie, that’s just the beginning.”

From under the table Starsky grabbed Hutch’s leg and pinched it.

“Ouch!” Hutch bent to take a look under the table and found a very disturbed Starsky shaking his head vigorously.

“What” Hutch whispered.

“Cut it out.”

“What?”

“That damn slash talk, it makes me sick.”

“I’m just stalling for time Starsk and this will keep them busy for a while.”

“Hey, get away from under the table,” Grace ordered, “and let me see your hands when you resurface.”

Siobhan giggled, “Just like in Shootout.”

Yeah,” Faith sighed, “One of my favourites.”

“Mine too,” Hope drooled, “together with ‘A Coffin For Starsky’.”

A loud thud told Hutch that Starsky once again had bumped his head against the table and for the second time in two minutes he disappeared under the table. “You okay buddy?”

“They got a coffin for me.” Starsky groaned, “they’re gonna kill me Hutch.”

“I won’t let them Starsk, don’t worry.”

“I won’t say it again cop! Come from under that damn table or else…” Grace cracked her beloved whip and in a second Hutch sat straight up in his chair.

“Don’t hurt him,” he begged, “I’ll do as you say.”

“Good boy,” Grace grumbled, “Now stay here and listen. And you too Curly, it’s important for you too.”

“We’re listening,” Said Hutch for the both of them which earned him another pinch in the shin.

“First,” Grace started, “hand over your guns, both of you.”

“Never!” was Hutch’s firm reply.

“No!” came a muffled voice from under the table.

“Girls!”

The four women stood at the same time and surrounded Hutch, who tried to get his gun, but Grace was faster and with a “Got it!” she grabbed it from its holster. She was stopped by the sound of another gun being cocked under the table.

Starsky’s smiling face appeared again, followed by his hand with his gun in it.

“The tables have turned, witch! Give him his gun back.”

For a short moment Grace was stunned but she regained her wits surprisingly fast.

“It seems to me it’s a standoff, don’t you think?”

Hutch watched the three other women and noticed that they didn’t know what to do. Siobhan’s eyes were darting from Grace to Starsky, Faith stood with her mouth open and Hope stared at Starsky with obvious admiration written all over her face.

Hutch decided to take the risk and held out his hand. “Give me the gun Grace. You won’t stand a chance against my partner.”

She looked at him with disgust and took a step backwards, the heavy gun waving between Hutch and Starsky.

“Don’t make me shoot you Grace,” Starsky pleaded, “I don’t wanna hurt you honey.”

“We want to know more about the slash thing, “ Hutch added, hoping to distract her from her plans that were most certainly deadly.

“Yes Grace, let’s tell them about slash; they really want to know, can’t you see that?” Faith begged.

“Maybe we can let them try out some of our ideas,” Hope thought, her heart rate speeding up.

“I still have something to finish and it’s slash,” said Siobhan, “I want to know what they think about it.”

Grace thought about it and apparently she liked the ideas because she put the gun down on the table at the same time they heard a loud thud and saw Starsky lying on the ground, his eyes closed and the gun besides him. He had fainted.

 

 

It took a while to revive Starsky but finally the six of them were seated at the table again. Faith poured coffee and Grace seemed to relax a little although the whip was still in her lap.

Siobhan and Hope kept staring at Starsky but he decided to ignore them and concentrate on Hutch and Grace. Hutch’s gun was still on the table and he didn’t dare to risk the precarious truce they seemed to have established.

Siobhan hurried to pour milk and sugar in Starsky’s coffee, her eyes big and glistening.

 “So,” Hutch started the conversation, “Who wants to start explaining what this is all about?”

Grace shrugged, her eyes glued on Hutch’s gun, Hope couldn’t make a sound, Siobhan started giggling and Faith bit her lower lip.

“Nobody? Okay, maybe it’s easier if I ask questions?”

“What do you want to know?” Grace asked, her voice low and hostile.

“First thing that comes to mind is this,” Hutch said, “What is this obsession with my partner?”

“He is so damn cute,” Siobhan whispered with a deep red blush on her cheeks.

“He’s so incredible sexy,” Faith muttered looking at her hands.

Starsky sat in his chair beaming at the women’s words.

“I think I love him.” Hope whispered, “I’d marry him if he’d ask me.”

Starsky’s coffee cup fell on the floor and he made an attempt to hide under the table again.

Hutch grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and kept him seated. “Stay pal!”

“But Hutch, I don’t wanna get married, no offence lady, but I wanna stay single.”

“You wanted to marry Terry,” Hope pointed out, “What’s changed since then?”

“She died.”

“Yeah, well, isn’t it about time you got over her?” Hope snapped, “Or…is it your partner that stands in the way of you getting married?”

She threw an angry glance at Hutch and if looks could kill, Starsky would have had to say goodbye to his partner forever.

“Hutch?” asked Starsky not understanding, “Why would Hutch not want me to marry?”

“Because…maybe…he wants to keep you to himself.” Grace answered, laughing her evil laugh.

Starsky looked sick and Hutch turned bright red. The women laughed and Hope said, “I told you they got the hots for each other.”

“Hutch,” Starsky pleaded, “Can we go home now? I’m not amused at all.” He looked at Hutch and his eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Don’t tell me you have the hots for me buddy, don’t tell me these creeps are right!”

“Don’t be ridiculous Starsk, of course I have no such feelings for you. You’re my friend, not the subject of my desire.”

“You’d better tell the truth Hutch or, so help me God, I’ll kill you.”

“Calm down buddy, these loonies are trying to get to you and they’re doing a great job.”

Grace jumped to her feet, whip in her hand and yelled, “I told you not to use that word! It’s your fault your partner is gonna pay for your stupidity!”

She lifted the hand with the whip and let it come down on Starsky’s back with a loud crack.

“Huuuuutch!”

 

Starsky woke up with Hutch’s name on his lips. Confused he looked around but it was dark.

Where am I? What happened? Hutch?

He let his hands wander around him and felt the sheets and blankets of his own bed.

It was a dream, just a dream. No, not a dream, a nightmare!

He turned to his nightstand and turned on the light. A soft glow spread through his bedroom and with a sigh he sat straight up in bed. Knowing he wouldn’t be able to sleep again, he swung his legs over the edge of his bed and sat there for a few minutes. What the hell have I been dreaming? Slash? What is slash? Four women after me? I need a drink.

He jumped when the telephone rang and for a moment he was tempted to let it ring.

“Hello?”

“Starsk? Are you awake?”

“Yes, what’s wrong?”

“It’s weird, but I had the strangest dream. No, worse than that, it was a nightmare.”

 

 

On Playboy Island Papa Theodore laughed and went to sleep!

 

 

The End.