We flee the cruise,
fleeing home.
We feel eachother,
staring at the eyes.
We say nothing,
but we stare.
We hope
and hope
one day,
one of us will say;
Hello.

But we leave,
far away from where we meet,
just to realize
we missed another opportunity..

It's time to break,
breaking down in my head,
broken pieces in my heart.

I heard it all
every word you said to me.
It took me time
realizing it can never be,
it can never have a chance.
You'll be there,
and I'll be away,
and even then,
there's so much I dare not say.

I want to tell you
I still love you,
as if it is you
acting as the thin wire,
keeping me sane,
giving me hope to a future.

A future I look forward to.
Cowardly as I am,
I run away
for I do not know,
what your reaction might be
if I told you how I feel.

Hoping you'll never read this,
and hoping you do,
it tears me apart.

Like a dragon circling the full moon,
showing it's glowing scales
to the creatures of the night,
your feelings came to surface
and shown me the light of love.

Only at night is the dragon visible,
however you are not.
You are there with me
every second of the day,
having my heart for yourself.

As the dragon sings its song,
I can hear your voice,
your oh so beautiful voice,
causing my heart to skip a beat.

But just like the dragon,
you are so far away.
And I know, someday
you will be within reach,
and I'll treasure our time together
as the dragon would treasure
the life and safety of its cub.

I love you with all my heart,
and I'll let the dragon sing...
just for you.

Loneliness causing silence
A silence ...
which is incomprehensible
A silence ...
that is unwanted

Sometimes the loneliness
is not only causing silence,
but is also caused by it.
Eventually,
it could lead to bad things,
like suicide, depression
like homicide, aggression
Or,
it could lead to insanity,
ending up in an asylum

Whatever happens,
only one person can cure all this..
That one person
everyone is looking for.

Feeling it
closing in
getting to me
It feels so dark
So angry
Yet
So good

Why
How
Am i feeling this?
It's telling me
to flee
run away
far away
from you.
But it's useless
I don't want to
not from you
You're too special

It's killing me
wanting to be with you
It's killing me
longing for you
It's killing me
to think
you're hiding things
It's killing me
to imagine a life
without you

Please
let me know
What is it
you're hiding

It's a torture
not knowing
What's wrong
What you expect
not knowing
What I should do
all for you

It's killing me..

->20/03/09<-
Another day,
another face,
another laugh..
but the same pain.

Thinking about doing something,
something fun,
but in the end
not even doing it,
solely to be alone.

Why to be alone?
Why not be with friends,
or with a loved one?
Perhaps
it's to avoid further fights,
arguments which will lead
to absolutely nothing.

If not to avoid getting hurt
by people you valued important.
Hurt in such a way,
you feel you're abandoned
by every
single person
you know in your life.

If you want to discover
who you truly are,
imagine yourself
all alone on a world
full of nothing
and no one.
If you know
just exactly who you are,
then imagine living
with someone you love.

From night till evening
we wander in the dark,
hoping someday we,
just we,
can look in the light.

As the day passes by,
we keep feeling the same pain,
over and over again.
Will it end someday?
Or will we have to end it,
with our own hands,
and thus make people around us
suffer more,
than when they suffer in hell?
Maybe there's a chance,
we don't have to go on like this.
Maybe,
just maybe,
there's a chance,
someone will help us...
help us in ending this eternal pain.
Until that day,
we will have to bare
that which we can't bare any longer.
The pain is being let out
on our own body,
and the pain become scars.
Look around us,
and ask yourself.
Who are you
to know what you are?

My heart being consumed
by some sort of feeling,
a feeling full of evil.
Is it hate,
is it anger?
So many people I know
so few people who,
act like a volunteer,
and speak to me.

What is it,
that causes these emotions,
that occur at least once every year?
Supernatural powers?
My belief which
I don't believe in?
If you know,
could you tell me,
or are you too close
with your feelings,
and don't want to feel
what I feel?
Or are you just scared,
to face it?!

->04/03/'09<-
Everyday is a day
a day closer to death.
Daily suffering
from the world around you.
Weekly killing
of the heart within you.
Every second thinking
about how the end would be,
about how you might live on.

Everyday you have to fight.
Fight to survive the day.
Fight not to break down.

Wondering what to do
the day slowly goes by.

You fight for your life,
You fight to remain yourself...

->04/03/'09<-
Along the road
a star shines upon you.
You look up,
and you see the glow.
You see it like..
nothing..
absolutely nothing you've seen before.
You see the moon,
not a full moon,
but just...a moon.
You realize what happened;
you changed.
You would never have noticed
what's so special and yet
so common in this world.
You stand still
and watch the sky.
As you stand there,
there's a slight draft
going through your hair.
You shiver,
you turn around,
you see...
nothing.