"It's not bad luck," she purrs, "if I'm not wearing the dress anymore."
In white undies and bra, she embraces him. They kiss. Passionately.
Just another day in the glamorous Los Angeles fashion world, as depicted on The Bold and the Beautiful, the most popular soap opera in the world, seen by 35 million to 40 million people a day in 140-plus countries from Canada to South Africa to Thailand. Its stars appear on magazine covers across the planet. Its fans endeavour to sneak into the studio for a glance at their idols. And its ratings are slipping. Not diving, but slipping.
There are nine soap operas left on the big three U.S. networks. That number will fall to eight in September, when NBC moves Passions from broadcast to satellite delivery. Even the venerable Young and the Restless has seen its dominion contract -- in February it was pulled from the schedule of Australia's Channel 9 in favour of a homegrown talk show (which has since been cancelled).
As of this spring, the nine soaps had a collective audience of 29.6 million Americans, down 1.1 million from a year earlier. Y&R is the undisputed leader in the U.S., with B&B a touch ahead of General Hospital for second spot. But overseas, it is B&B that rules. It has more viewers each day in Italy than it does in its home market. During one foreign shoot, says supervising producer Rhonda Friedman, "We found out we were like gods in Greece."
At a symposium nine years ago, the late Philip Bell, legendary co-creator of B&B, attributed its international success in part to its half-hour format (the other U.S. soaps are all 60 minutes), which makes it simpler for foreign networks to slide into their schedules.
Another aspect of soaps' appeal for fans: No reruns, no hiatuses. You get fresh meat every day. Which exacts a toll on the cast and crew as they pump out 260 episodes a year.
I visited the set on July 20, a week before production was to take a three-week break, the longest in B&B's 20-year history. But viewers won't notice a thing, as the normal five-week backlog of episodes was being stockpiled to eight weeks, with everybody working harder in order to earn their longish vacation.
The actors were ready for the time off. Jennifer Gareis, who plays Donna, kept having trouble in the off-with-the-wedding-dress scene. Her zipper became stuck. Then she flubbed her lines a couple of times. "Just having such a problem speaking today," she said. "I don't know what my friggin' problem is." She sounded close to tears.
It could be worse -- this could be an hour-long show.
Montreal native William deVry joined the B&B cast as Storm Logan last year; previously, he appeared on All My Children. There, each script was 35 to 40 pages, but "here a big day would be 15 to 20 pages, max."
A typical day in the studio, which is as vast as an airport hangar, begins at 4 a.m. with crews setting up walls and building sets; the studio has room for six: three on one side and three on the other. In between is a vast open space for the crew. Starting around 8 a.m., decorators furnish the sets. The lighting people come in around 9 a.m., and at 10 a.m. the actors block out their scenes with the director. Taping normally starts around 11 a.m. and ends between 3:30 p.m. and 6:30 p.m., though if the scenes are complex it can go as late as 10:30 p.m.
Guest stars and stunts diminish the monotony of this routine. Yesterday, Canada's own Alan Thicke reprised his role as unscrupulous talk-show host Rich Ginger (named, by the way, after B&B's chief financial officer). And on Aug. 24, there'll be a sing-off involving Constantine Maroulis, a B&B cast member who finished sixth on American Idol two years ago.
"People really have no idea how much effort it takes to do a show like this on a daily basis," says Ronn Moss, who plays Ridge Forrester. "A well-oiled machine -- that's the only way we can do it."
If anyone is the face of B&B, it is Moss, who has been with the drama since its first episode, on Mar. 23, 1987 (before that he was bassist for Player, whose Baby Come Back was a No. 1 hit in 1978).
He is the total soap-opera package: perfect hair, cheekbones like slate, trim physique, deep bedroom voice. Ridge is sensitive now, but in the series premiere he was a cad. Stylin' in a checked jacket and checked shirt with contrasting patterns, he critiqued his dad's fashion show as lacking in sexy: "Dad, you know me. I like to be turned on by women. All men do." He has softened since.
Ashley and Ridge are talking in the lab (primary components of which include bath beads, rock salt and Qtips). Ashley isn't wild that Ridge's plan for the family weekend at Big Bear includes Brooke, whose heart has long intertwined with Ridge's.
Boldly Ridge grabs a hold of Ashley and kisses her.
"Is that," he says, "reassurance enough?" Again they kiss. Again, passionately. - The Bold and the Beautiful airs on CBS and CTV at 1:30 p.m. For more on Ronn Moss, check outwww.ronnmoss.com.
rmckenzie@nationalpost.com