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Mixed Media News Letter keeping you current on the ins and outs of STOP~WATCH & Respond

Safe Parent: Ideas that work!

Safe Parent section of ReAction News is here to lend a KIT on keeping it together in public places!  Issues regarding public discipline are sensitive but necessary.  We here at ReAction News are proud to take on the tough talk issues.  We hope you find these comments and suggestions useful.  Feel free to discuss them in our Open ReAction Forum. 

Key Notes:

  • Never lash out on a child in anger
  • Discipline begins at home
  • Until the child has learned the new habit of "Hands Off" in the store, Remind your child each time you are in route of the "Hands off" policy and the consequences for touchng.
  • Always have a "Handyman" approach to discipline: five levels of punishment to fit five levels of disobedience.  The fist level fitting minor offenses, increasing each level accordingly.   

Kids who like to touch things in the store:

If you have a child who loves to reach out for things on the store shelf, then here are a few great ways to keep "Hands off" in the store, works great at other times as well. 

 NOTE: Hands at side is rarely effective.

  1. Reinstruct the child while on the way to the store of what you expect from them.
  2. If child forgets, which initially will certainly happen, use the hands behind your back technique.  Child can comfortably move throughout the store.  If hands begin to come out from behind the back be sure to remind them "hands behind the back"
  3. If after several reminders, the child persists, advance to folding of arms across their chest.  Child can still move comfortably throughout the store.  If arms beging to unfold quickly remind them "fold your arms"
  4. Finally, if the child still is unable to keep hands off, have child place hands on top of head... Child is less comfortable moving throughout the store and my appear distressed.  The child dislikes this position most and will be more likely to keep hands off.  When child has agreed to keep hands off, revert back to folding arms. 

The "Handyman" can. 

Example of Offense:

  • Hitting when it's not self defense
  • Disrespecting in someone else's home
  • Property Damage

The guideline for the "Handyman" can is:

"Whatever it is that you do or have, make use of it, don't abuse it... abuse it... you lose it."

Example of Degree of punishment:

  • Sit on hands with no talking
  • Face to face apology to owner
  • Earn the repair

 

Safe Parent Word Glossary

  • Discipline: "To discipline thus means to instruct a person or animal to follow a particular code of conduct, or to adhere to a certain "order." Consequently, "in the field of child development, discipline refers to methods of modeling character and of teaching self-control and acceptable behavior."

  • Whoopin': "Term used mostly by black people describing what happens to kids when they get into trouble. A whoopin can be given with anything your mama picks up. (belt, switch, hair brush, fly swatter, etc.) Also, years ago in black neighborhoods, you could get your ass whooped by any adult on your street who saw you doing something bad. Also, alot of older black folks firmly believe in whoopin kids' asses."

  • Beating: "hitting several or many times causing much bruising."

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