Uh-Oh Lyrics

Let's face it: some of the lyrics to Cats can be kind of hard to make out the first few times you watch the video, and some may have to look them up somewhere to really get it right (I know I did). What I want to know is, what misconceptions did you used to have about the lyrics to Cats?

	What the lyrics really are	My misconception
Mystitat's examples (and yes, these were my own misconceptions):	“Hallelujah, angelical choir!”	“Hallelujah, a Jellicle Choir!”
	“The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat”	“Thrum Tum Tugger is a curious cat”
	“Round the cathedral rang Vivat”	“Round the cathedral rang the cat”
	“To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment”	“To prevent them from idle and want and destroyment”

Examples submitted by other people (newer entries are in magenta):

Person	What the lyrics really are	Misconceptions
Alexis	"...for there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle."	"...for there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible mother."
Aerin	"The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing."	"The Rum Tum Tugger is awful annoying"
MystaFyre	"The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing."	"The Rum Tum Tugger is awful annoying"
Tigress	"The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing."	"The Rum Tum Tugger is awful annoying"
Tigress	“No commonplace mousers have such well-cut trousers.”	“no commonplace mousers have such trunker trousers"
Quidam	“The mystical divinity of unashamed felinity Round the cathedral rang 'Vivat'”	“They mystical divinity of silence straight infinity From the cathedral rang frame by frame”
Quidam	“If you offer me cream then I sniff and sneer”	“If you offer me queen then I sniff and sneer”
Tugger_kitty	“He's a fiend in feline shape"	"He's a fiend in feline chef"
Nodikus	“For your Pollicle dog is a dour Yorkshire tyke”	“For your Pollicle dog is a door that's shut tight”
Nodikus	“And remarkably smart at a smash and grab”	“And we always start at a blast or a blam.”
Tabitha	“Do you like your morning tea weak or strong?”	“Do you like your morning tea with a straw?”
Puddycat	“I'd been busy in the luggage van”	“I'd been p***ing in the luggage van” (Mystitat: O.o Puddycat: Well, he is a tomcat)
Felina	“Jellicle Cats sing Jellicle chants”	"Jellicle Cats sing Jellicle charms"
	“In the season of venison, I give my ben'son To the Pothunter's succulent bones.”	"In the season of venison I give my benson to the pot and it's succulent groans."
	“There are dogs out of every nation, the Irish, the Welsh and the Dane, the Russian, the Dutch, the Dalmatian”	"There are dogs out of every nation, the Irish, the wolf and the Dane, the Russian and snuffling dalmation"
	“And his braw Scottish cousins...”	"then his broad Scottish cousins"
	“We'd go through the house like a hurricane, and no sober person could take his oath”	"we go through the air like a hurricane, and nonchalant-ness could make his oath"
	“Round the cathedral rang 'Vivat!'”	"round the Cathedral square, my hat!"
	“The moments of happiness, we had the experience, but missed the meaning”	"the moments of happy days, we have the experience but miss the evening"
	“As knockabout clowns, quick-change comedians”	"as knockabout clowns, quick-change chameleons"
	“Jellicle Cats”	“Jellico Cats”
	“All hail and all power to the Great Rumpus Cat”	“orlail and lord par to the great Rumpuscat”
	“The bagmen playing cards”	“The bagmen were in cards”
Lillypaw	“All hail and all power to the great Rumpuscat”	“All hail and all bow to the great Rumplescat”
Rumpleteazer	"In the season of venison I'd give my ben'son to the Pothunter's succulent bones"	"In the season of vensison I'd give my ben'son to the pot, unto succulent bones."
Rumpleteazer's little sister
	"Would you like your morning tea weak or strong?"	"Would you like your morning tea with a straw?"
	“Toodlepip!”	“Toodlepit!”
Koishii-Kitsune-Askira	“We go through the house like a hurricane”	“We go through the ass like a hurricane”
Melissa	“My name is Little Tom Pollicle and you better not do it again.”	“Anything that resembles a Pollicle and you better not do it again.”
The Entire Fandom	“All hail and all power to the Great Rumpus Cat” (this is apparently in the official lyrics)	“All hail and all bow to the Great Rumpus Cat”
Alonza	“There are dogs out of every nation, the Irish, the Welsh and the Dane, the Russian, the Dutch, the Dalmatian”	"There are dogs out of every nation, the Irish, the Welsh, and the Dame, the Russian, the Tussian Dalmation"
Nikabelle	“My name is Little Tom Pollicle and you better not do it again”	“Some idiot angered a Pollicle, and they better not do it again.”
Bealzabub	“That my name it is Little Tom Pollicle, And you'd better not do it again!”	“That their meaning is purely symbolical And they better not do it again!”
Bealzabub	“Up, up, up, past the Russel Hotel”	“Up, up, up, hussle to the Russel Hotel”

If you have any examples to add to my list (from yourself, your friends, etc.), please send them through my contact form or email me at mystitat@gmail.com . Thanks!
(If you're still not sure what the real lyrics are, they can be found at Pieville.)

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