The Pontifications of Pompuss

A Big Thank You to Raging Bull for this insight.   (He stumbled upon the quotation in a  paddock somewhere.)

"I have never understood why women love cats.

Cats are independent, they don’t listen, they don’t come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they’re home they like to be left alone and sleep.

In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat."

anon.

I agree. It is rather a puzzle.    

A recent copy of "The American', the Journal of the American Enterprise Institute carries an article which investigates the relationship between conservatism/liberalism and intelligence.

http://www.american.com/archive/2009/october/are-liberals-smarter-than-conservatives

Lazar Stankov, a visiting professor at Singapore's National Institute of Education, claims to have found that conservatism is negatively correlated to cognitive ability on both an individual and national level of analysis.   This suggests that liberals are more intelligent than conservatives.     However, given the difficulties of definition and the political prejudices of readers I suspect that the discussion stimulated by these results will generate more heat than light.

I have grown to be suspicious of cleverness as  even this cat has met people with bucketloads of academic qualifications and absolutely no sense at all.   Once a bearded,  beshorted, besandaled Doctorate of Veterinary Science house and catsat for a weekend....and he ate the fillet steak and gave me jellymeat!    Expletive deleted.

In my NSHO simple lovingkindness is a quality to be preferred over intelligence any day.

Once again Pompuss is bemused and truly puzzled by human behaviour.

The Prime Ministers of Australia and the UK intend apologising to the (now nearly geriatric) thousands who were sent out to Australia and New Zealand as children and lost all contact with their birth parents.

Now I ask you.   What earthly use is an apology going to be?    In this world there is nothing to be gained from looking back at the past.   We can merely learn from it, alter our own behaviour accordingly and move on into the future.  

 I don't believe that an apology would help me in any way even though I never saw my parents, Cyrus Roshan IV and Zuleika Tahereh, again after I was torn from their loving paws, neutered and  placed on display for sale as if at a slave auction.    I have made my  own life and that is what I think all those humans need to do.    

Apologies - Pah - they only make politicians feel better about themselves and people should be sophisticated enough to see 'feel good politics'  for what it is - a  bribe and a swindle.  

Speaking for Moi,  the Great Cat knows that  I am so disgusted that I need to go to the kitchen and demand a morning snack to make myself feel better......    Now what do I want?....fish roe or chocolate?

Alas, my days as a beachbum are over.   The house slaves appeared this morning, scooped me up and carried me home  where I have been petted, cuddled, fed on tasty morsels and given a bath and fur fluff.   I'm almost myself again.

 In a way I am relieved as my dinky little driftwood cabana proved to be lacking in draught proofing.    Nor was it water-tight and the weather at the beach has been miserably cold. 

That apart,  my few days hiding by the sea was fun.   I loved the smell of the ozone, the noise of the waves and the multitude of fieldmice in the hedges nearby.    I wasn't even  bothered too much by the slavering intrusions of dogs  let off their leads for exercise  as an air of hauteur and a Force Ten Hiss  always sufficed to send them on their way.

Back at the house all traces of the Halloween Disaster have disappeared and no-one seems to want to blame me for it.    Not of course that it was my fault anyway.   Oh bliss, and all praise to the Great Cat, here comes slave woman with my fur brush and silk polishing cloth.    She must really have missed me.

I should have listened to you Minette.    Plenty went wrong at my Halloween Kneesup and  yes, Rufus did disgrace himself, and in the spa bath...but that's another story.

We had a wonderful time last week with lots of games and nightly dancing to Musique de Chat.   Mrs Wicks even remembered to feed me every day but disaster struck when a filthy dirty  possum came down the chimney!   I don't think it wanted to join the party  - it was just lost.   However, whilst trying to find a way out it spread soot plus droppings over the carpet and tore a cushion to pieces!     I've found a temporary home until things calm down.............

The slaves have sloped off to Oz for a few days in the sun leaving moi in charge!

Amazingly, and at great potential risk to her lovingly tended home, Slave Mother has decided not to park me at Pussy's Delight, aka The Cat Spa, but to ask Old Mother Wicks next door to feed me until next Thursday.  

Whoopee.  It's party time.   I've spread the word around the gang and Gloria, McIntosh Tom, Sam Grubble and Rufus will be here soon.   Actually I'm a little worried about Rufus as he's half feral and can't be trusted not to use the pot plants as a bathroom but when he's behaving himself he's very good value and fun company.

The downer is the old biddy who will feed me.  She probably only agreed to catsit because the slaves give her a bottle of sherry each Christmas.     I don't think she likes cats; she  chases me out of her garden whenever she sees me checking out the goldfish pond.........silly old trout doesn't realise I'd never filch while she was looking. 

Oh, that was the catflap - the Great Halloween Hooley is about to begin.........

At last a human has come up with a sensible idea!

As I was breakfasting this morning I heard on the radio that the controversial Mayor of a small provincial city is suggesting that the State pay people from the underclass (whoever they are) a gratuity if they opt for voluntary sterilisation.

I've said before that I think humans should control their breeding and shall go to meet the Great Cat still believing that population control would go a long way towards solving  the planet's problems........I wonder why people don't listen to me........

Predictably there were howls of outrage from people who derive their livings from looking after the 'underclass'.    They all seemed to miss the point that by denying  these people the  chance to opt for voluntary sterilisation they are insulting them by not only limiting their potential income but also by suggesting that they aren't capable of making such a decision by themselves.  

Humans have compulsorily sterilised cats, dogs, horses cattle and sheep  for centuries and I'm sure I speak for all those others when I say it's high time people looked at the potential benefits for humankind.

Sterilisation isn't so bad.    I'll admit that I was briefly traumatised by my little operation but I soon found replacement pleasures and so would the underclass.    Mind you there would probably very soon be 'middle class capture' of the gratuity as everyone else piled in for a few extra dollars.    

In Tasmania the Cat Management Bill 2009 allows councils and state authorities to declare parks and reserves off limits to cats.   Any caught there will be trapped and destroyed.    Farmers will be permitted to destroy any cat found on their land if it is more than a kilometer from a home.   

What is more, all domestic cats must be microchipped and neutered.

What an outrage.   This is an appalling restriction upon the rights of felines.   Anyone would think we frightened cows and sheep by chasing them - cats don't, dogs do.   Or that we cast offensive matter on edible crops - cats don't, dogs do.   Or that we are a public nuisance and liable to attack stray humans - cats don't, dogs do.   Need I go on?

Whatever are the lawmakers of Tasmania thinking of?    Have they got hold of some of the medicinal opium poppy crop that is grown on their island?     Time they returned to reality and realised that cats are harmless and when treated properly make a very positive contribution to society.