Paige-Paige

Ok, I was at the website The Beatles Fan Fiction Directory, and I came across a fanfiction call something along the lines of Bathtime with John, or something like that.  Well, I thought it was funny so I wrote another episode of it.  And if the original author of that story doesn't want me to have this here, I'll get rid of it.  And please, if you know the story report it's official name and author!  Thanx!

 

JOHN: (In tub.)  Guten Morgen!  Welcome to bathtime with me, Betty!  And      today we have a guest!  The captain of the sub, the S.S. McCartney!  Please welcome Captain Paulio!  Ah, HE is ze filthy Englander!  Mwahahaha!

Paul[io]: Aye!  Thank ye thar John!  Arr! 

            (Both are crammed into an overly sudsy tub.)

John:  Attack S.S. McCartney!  (splashes violently jabbing Paul in the chest with an orange boat.)

Paul[io]: Oh ow!  Hey!  Oh, um, I mean YARR!  Die Lennon!  Die!  Go down, down, down!  Straight to the bottom!  (covers eyes like an eyepatch with a handful of bubbles.)  TORPEDO!

John: Nooooo!  Not again!  Help!  Help!  Ick!  Headphones!  Help me!  Help!

Paul[io]: Wait!  Something's amiss!

John: *plugs nose like an announcer* MORE bubbles Captain Paulio! *un-plugs nose*

Paul[io]: YARRR!  I'm ze filthy Englander!  (puts in way to much bubble bath in.)  SHAZAM!

John: Ah-ha-hee-ho!  Oh yeah!  I was sinking!  A-hem!  Yes.  Help!  Ick!  HEADPHONES!!  HELP ME!!  HELP!!

Paul[io]:  Mwahahahaha!  YARRR!  I am victorious!

John:  (as he makes his ship sink)  *plugs nose*  A-hem!  Attention!  Women and children and Paul first!  I REPEAT-NOBODY PANIC *screams*  Women, children and Paul first!  *un-plugs nose*   Sorry Paul.

Paul[io]: Why...?  (finally gets it) HEY!

John: Ah, but what?  They don't take kindly to insults though! 

Paul[io]:  HEY!  YOU"RE NOT ALLOWED TO STEAL MY LINES!

John: You're a swine!

George: (from outside of the bathroom) Yeah a swine.

Paul[io]: Shove up!

John: ANYWAY, I have another ship still!  HAHAHAHA!  Guten morgen to you too, Captain Girlio! 

Paul[io]: HEY!

John: uh-huh.  (gives Paul "you're crazy" look.)  CANNON!  You're takin' on water! 

Paul[io]:  Yeah, well so are you! (jabs John underwater forcefully.) 

John: *slightly higher-sounding voice* That was cheap! (bends over slightly and drops boat he was holding.) 

Paul[io]: (smirks) Worked didn't it?

John: Yeah.

Paul[io]:  I am once again victorious!

John: Ok! You asked for it! (Takes Paul's head and shoves him forward into the water.  Paul struggles to get back up, and John laughs evilly.  Paul finally gets up.)

Paul[io]: (coughes up bubbles)  That was...horribles you...you....

John: Git?  Swine?

Paul[io]: I'll cripple ya!

John: Oh YEAH?

Paul[io]: YEAH!

John: YEAH!

Paul[io]: Anyway, it's your fault!

John: (imintating Ringo) Why me?

George: (now in the bathroom) Why not you?

John: Oh, well that makes sense.

Paul[io]: Uh-huh.

George: Yeah.  I just thought you two might want to know that Ringo's home.

Paul[io] and John: (perk up instantly.  They start to get out of the tub.)

George: WAIT! (puts hand over eyes.)  You guys have swimming trunks on right?

Paul[io]:  Well I do!

George: Well, what about you John?

John: Well...um...

Paul[io]: (absolutely disgusted and both are still in the tub.)  OH MY GOD!  *sceams like a little girl*  EWWWWW!

John: (annoyed)  Calm down Paul!  I do.  Jeeze, I do.

Paul[io]: Oh, good!

George: Likewise.  Any way Ringo's home from the party.  He says he has something for you guys.

John:  (jumps out of the tub, followed by Paul, acting like little kids.)  OOOH!  BIRDS!

Paul[io]:  ICE CREAM!!

George:  (shakes head and follows them out of the bathroom)

fine