Old Risu's Toe Nails
51 - 75


51. "If the Dharma is true,
What can you say about the world,"
Asked a student?
Old Risu made a strangling noise.

52. "on the day I died
Nothing special happened,"
Said the sensei.
Shoving several students away
He said, "let me pass peacefully."

53. "Old, fat, and unhappy,
Have you seen my old mind?"
Old Risu made a paper crane
And threw it on the fire.

54. Old Risu said,
"Before I die I want to
Do something for all beings.
So I'll shut up."

55. Old Risu watched some students
Eating lunch.
"How's your balance today," he called.
He clapped three times and left.

56. "For each mistake I hit you 30 times.
For each truth you tell I hit you 30 times.
When Autumn comes
Remind me to give you 30 more blows,"
Said old Risu.

57. "Who comes up here and sits
Telling you this and that?
Quickly now. It won't come up again,"
Sensei said.

58. "Sitting is easy,"
Said old Risu.
"Sitting while standing,
Then you're getting somewhere."

59. "To concentrate your mind
Grind your own rice into flour.
What could you bake with that,"
Asked old Risu?

60. "Tea dust in a typhoon.
Is it all lost
Or does everyone have tea?"
Old Risu smiled at his students.
"Not everyone at once."

61. A student asked,
"What's so great about the Lotus Sutra?"
Old Risu stomped on his toes and said,
"Hurt's doesn't it?"

62. Old Risu said to his student,
"You say you are Kaika Buyo.
You say I am Old Risu.
What do you call Buddha?"

63. "A drop of Bodhidharmas sweat
Taught me so much," said a student.
Old Risu turned a complete circle
And sneezed on him.

64. A student asked the sensei,
"What are you doing?"
Old Risu yawned and answered,
"Watching the inside of an asses skull."
"That doesn't make sense," replied the student.
Roaring with laughter the sensei said,
"Ai! Ai! Ai!," and ran away.

65. "You don't know anything.
I don't know anything.
Anything doesn't know old Risu.
What does any of this have to do with you?"

66. Old Risu peered down from the high seat.
"You are all sideways rabbits.
I am done with you for the day."
He rose and left the temple.

67. A student asked old Risu,
"Impart your deepest understanding."
The sensei handed him an empty cup
And said, "Drink a cup of tea."

68. "What has Buddha got in his closed hand?
What has Buddha got in his open hand,"
Said old Risu to his student?
When no answer came
He hopped about on one leg screaming,
"Kill the stork!"

69. A priest asked the sitting sensei,
"How's it going?"
Old Risu, not moving, replied,
"It never came."

70. Sensei told a student,
"If I planted you in a rice field
You would still be a cabbage.
No next of kin there.
What do you think?"

71. When the moktak was first struck
Old Risu ran from the hall screaming,
"Fire! Fire!"

72. Old Risu looked out at his students.
"Here sits a crop of open sores
And yet you can't see
The boils on your own backsides."

73. "If you meet a Patriarch on the road
Which of you gets to the hall first?"
Old Risu tossed a handfull of leaves
At his students.

74. A student asked the sensei,
"What sort of priest should I be?"
Old Risu whistled and whispered,
"None at all."

75. A student asked old Risu,
"What never changes,
Is always happy, and is with you each day,
White as snow?"
The sensei said bending over,
"My ass breaking wind."

Enjoy,
T.S., Nita, and the ten infamous sleepers
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