Dealing With Rejection
by Pam Lontos
Selling can be frustrating.
When you first start selling, you are so excited! You believe so strongly in your product or service. You just
know that everyone you talk to will also love it and want to buy it immediately. You are so excited that what
you have to offer will not only help your prospects get something they want, it is also going to make you
rich. It's a dream come true!
However, that dream can be shattered as you receive more and more rejection. Rejection can be
devastating. This is especially true if you have never sold anything before.
This just does not have to happen. While rejection is never as pleasant as acceptance, it can be handled
positively. It's not the rejection, but how you react to it, that's the problem. If you see rejection as a part of
success, rather than the end of the world, your reaction will be much more positive.
Everyone gets rejected. Rejection is the price you pay for success. A "no" isn't final. A "no" is just part of a
process that leads to a "yes."
Often, people say no because they are afraid of making a decision. They may very well want what you are
selling; the main problem is that you quit selling too soon. You may have had an experience when
someone said no to you at first, but then suddenly changed his/her mind and said yes. This is because
some people have to say no several times before they feel safe saying yes. Until they feel confident
making the decision to say yes, prospects may even give you false objections.
Remember, a "no" means, "Tell me more. I'm not convinced enough to say 'yes.'" It doesn't necessarily
mean, "I don't want it." Persistence will pay off if you have the right attitude and understand that "no"
doesn't always mean "no." "No" is often phrased in these frequently heard objections: "I don't have the
money." "I tried it once and it didn't work." "I have to talk to my partner."
The only way around these rejections is to excite the prospect's interest right from the start. If you convince
him or her up front that there is a benefit to listening to you, you will be given a chance to talk.
Don't let a no bother you. Instead, expect to hear it and expect that after you show the benefits, you will
eventually get a yes.
When someone says no, you must be positive. Remember that it puts you that much closer to the
ultimate yes. You just have to keep selling long enough to overcome the prospect's natural fear of making
a decision.
The more benefits you give, the more you will raise the prospect's desire to want to buy. When the desire
is high enough, the fear of making a decision will leave, and you will often get your yes.
You may wonder if this works all the time. No, it doesn't. But it works enough to help you sell much more.
Don't worry about the few times it doesn't work. Remember, it's not the rejection, it's how you react to it.
One of the problems our reactions to rejection causes is fear of asking for the order or sale in the future.
You can't let a no stop you from asking the next prospect. You might get eight prospects in a row who say
no. However, the next five prospects may say yes. If you stop asking out of fear, you can be sure you'll
never get a yes.
Rejection can also cause apathy. You may think, "Why bother to ask her? Why tell her all the benefits of
what I'm offering? She is just going to say no anyway." So you just say to the prospect, "Here is the
literature. If you're interested, give me a call." You leave the prospect alone, figuring that you can't
persuade her and when she doesn't buy, you say, "I knew she wasn't going to buy."
Salespeople face constant rejection and it can cause them to lose confidence and belief in themselves.
They then voice doubts about what they can do. This is a self-fulfilling prophecy. As soon as they begin to
believe that they can't do something, they will conduct themselves so that the prophecy comes true.
To stop this cycle, whenever a doubt enters your mind, rephrase your thoughts in a positive way. Instead
of thinking, "I can't [get this booking]," change it to, "I'm a great salesperson and after she hears what I
have to say, she'll want to [book with] me!"
Here are five ways to handle rejection:
1. Be positive about rejection. Don't fear it. When you hear no, say to yourself, "That is fantastic! I've got
one no out of the way towards final acceptance. Now, where do I go from here?"
2. Learn from rejection. See what is failing and take it into account in the future.
3. Be fair to yourself. If you assume selling will be easy to learn and you fall short, you will feel bad
because you got a no. Give yourself some leeway. You can say, "This looks difficult, but I'm going to do it."
Then if you don't accomplish it at first, you can try again because you knew it wasn't going to be easy.
When you do succeed, you will feel a great sense of accomplishment.
4. Analyze the prospect. People are afraid of making the wrong decision in spending money. Is the
person really rejecting you or just unsure?
5. Get specific on the rejection. Find out why they have responded negatively and answer their
unanswered questions. A certain amount of rejection, if you practice the coping skills and learn from it,
actually builds self-confidence.
It's not always easy, but you can learn that the more no's you get in life, the more yes's you get too. The
possibility of rejection always looms when we take risks, but there is also a greater exposure to the joys
of hearing YES!
Pam Lontos is a nationally recognized sales trainer and motivational speaker. She is the former Vice
President of Sales for Disney's Shamrock Broadcasting, and can be reached at (407) 299-6128 or
www.prpr.net.
This article was originally published on Belinda Ellsworth's members-only website, The Success
Express, in July 2003. www.the-success-express.com