♥

no words can describe how i am feeling

you may think that you are the victim here

but you have no idea how hard it is

you will never know

you will never understand

cause you are the type that wont understand unless you experiance it your self

you can't even put yourself in my shoes

you only claim you can

i am not saying that i am the victim here

maybe we are

both of us

everyday i miss you

but i can't do anything about it

it sucks

i hope my life is over

but that will be selfish of me

thank you for everything

I'm never gonna say goodbye

Cos I never wanna see you cry

I swore to you my love would remain

And I swear it all over again and I

I'm never gonna treat you bad

Cos I never wanna see you sad

I swore to share your joy and your pain

And I swear it all over again

my love for you will remain

there's no doubt about that

now its up to you to decide

what we are now

don't ask too many questions

don't think too much

cause you will never understand

I hope time will fly faster.

It sucks. being like this. hmmph.

Everytime i stop to think, it hits me and my heart aches. wtf. its so irritating.

But i try not to think so much anyways. Just go on with my instincts.

I hope everything will go well i the future. I really am counting on that.

I'm so sorry dear

i never mean to hurt you

i never mean to make you cry

i'm just trying to clean up my dirty footsteps after me.

After all that you've done for me

I really appreciate it

i really do

but i had to do this

cause you would'nt understand

i have tried so many times to explain to you

but you kept saying that i'm emo, and does not know how to control my feelings thats why i wanna go on with this

but you're wrong

i'm being serious

i'm really thinking of every possibilities

but this is the only way out

to make everyone happy

my parents especially

can't you just sacrifice this much?

time is not a big thing.. it goes past quicker than you think

Our future is important.

Its okay to go through hardships now

Happy moments are waiting for us at the end of the tough rocky road

i believe that

i know that

We will get to what we have been aiming for

in peace and harmony

with full blessings and not half-hearted ones

life will be easier in the future with all that

don't you think so?

i do

Greed will get us nowhere. Patience will lead us to that dream.

it will be really sweet and peaceful

i know it

all we have to do is sacrifice a little

i know you can do it

like you always say

its the mind set that makes one react like how one reacts.

if you think you can, then you definitely can

if you think you can't, then you most probably can't

think about it

its been hard lately

i dont even know what am i feeling

my mother kept pastering me on some thing i hate to talk about.

fu** this depression i am having

GO AWAY
GO AWAY

i can't even control what i am feeling sometimes

its so hard

i wish i was never alive

i didnt go to school today

my stomach hurts

i kept wanting to go to the toilet to pass motion (HAHA)

my mother said i'm faking it

she said i am lazy

WTF

she never believes me.

stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid

ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH

i hate what i am feeling right now

but i guess i just have to live with it

i am starting to hate everything around me

everyone's turning their backs on me

i don't care

i feel like i'm better off alone anyway

my class teacher.

She called me.

asked me all sorts of questions i never want to share with her about.

i'm suspecting that my classmates told my teacher

that 'm different lately

"im not like last time"

WTF

stop tattling about me.

leave me alone.

was all in my head when that teacher consulted me

i dont like councelling.

i dont like peolple councelling me

my mother once sent me to meet a stupid councellor 2 years ago

WTFH

like hell i would open up to her

people kept saying that i have changed

WHY

i dont see any changes in me since 5 years ago.

well maybe there is some.

i am getting impatient

i cant hide my anger

i cry alot

i always feel left out and alone

i dont care about anything anymore.

everything around me

is pressuring me

why would i be what people want me to be

why must i react to things like people want me to

why cant i be myself

people keep claiming that i am not myself when i actually am

who are they to judge me

fu** off