Elizabeth: Rewriting the Future
A FBorFW fic by MeganKoumori
Rated PG for mild alcohol use and language
---
Elizabeth scrubbed her teeth and tongue as hard as she could. Then she spit out the toothpaste and gargled some mouthwash. No good. She could still taste last night’s rum, and the puke that had come with it.
Looking in the mirror, she could see her eyes, dark blue like her brother’s, were bloodshot and had big bags underneath them. Her hair was greasy and hung hopelessly in her face, listless and dull.
What’s happening to me? Thought Liz as she ran a washcloth under the faucet and wrung it out. I never used to drink like this!
True, she’d always enjoyed drinking, ever since her first beer on the beach back when she was a teen. And there had been times, at New Year’s parties and the like, where she had gotten hopelessly smashed. But those drunken times had only happened about four or five times in her life. She had never been one to drink to excess every day.
So why is it happening now? Liz turned on the tub faucet. There was no way she could skip school. Any more "sick days" and she’d be fired (Hangovers counted as a sickness, she stubbornly told herself.). She pulled off her Jersey nightshirt and panties and got under the show head…
No sooner had the water hit her skin, the phone rang. Cursing, she grabbed a towel and hopped out of the bathtub. It was too small and didn’t even cover her privates. Not caring, Liz ran out of the bathroom, past Shiimsa, who darted out of the way of a few water droplets, into the kitchen and to the island where she’d left the phone. Her big toe slammed against the wooden cabinet and Liz screamed the F-word in pain.
Shaking, she picked up the receiver. "H-hello?"
"Rise and shine, Early Bird!" Said a chipper voice. "Just wanted to make sure you were up and ready for school!"
What am I? A fourth grader? Liz thought bitterly. Aloud she said, "Thank you, Anthony. That’s so sweet." She could feel hot blood running out of the nail.
"Why don’t you stop by for dinner tonight? I’m making turnip bacon mash!"
I hate turnips! I told you that! I wrote it on the damn list of likes and dislikes you made us do! "Sounds…wonderful," She lied.
"Great! See you then!"
Liz hung up and hobbled to the medicine chest to grab a Band-Aid for after the shower. After using the towel to wipe away the excess blood, she threw it in the laundry she’d been too drunk to sort and walked back to the bathroom naked. Her apartment was in the basement; no one could see her.
She’d left the water running in her haste to get to the phone. What was the point of that call anyway? Anthony could’ve waited until after work to call and invite her. Or better yet, asked her the day before. She noticed that about him; he always seemed to call at the worst times. During new episodes of her favorite show, CSI (She didn’t have a DVR to pause the TV), while she was on the toilet, right as she was falling asleep, the list of inconvenient calls was long.
Of course he couldn’t help it. It’s not like he had a crystal ball to see what she was doing. Maybe if he didn’t call three to five times a day, though…
Liz could taste nasty bile and the salvia in her mouth suddenly surged. She leapt out of the shower and over to the pot, where she proceeded to let the rest of the rum leave her stomach, along with some of last night’s Chinese food.
---
Hangover or not, Liz made it through school. She had the children work quietly in their workbooks, as she rested at her desk, pretending to read.
Around ten, one of her second graders, small for his size, found himself at her desk. "Miss Patterson, the pencil sharpener broke." A group of students were gathered around the mess, shavings scattered around their feet.
Liz repressed the urge to curse. "Fine, I’ll get an electric one."
Her head was pounding as she walked down the hall to the supply closet. Dimly, she felt a longing for Mtigwaki and the school she had taught there. She remembered Paul, his gorgeous brown eyes which had first attracted her, and his dry sense of humor that had never failed to make her laugh…
What the hell is wrong with you? She suddenly snapped in her brain. You’ve got Anthony, and you love him! Sure Paul was handsome and funny and totally in love with you. But Anthony’s…stable.
And Paul wasn’t? Another part of her brain argued back. You were the one who wasn’t stable! You were the one who moved back without warning!
The first part countered, Even if that’s true, it doesn’t matter! Paul’s got Susan…
Whom he wouldn’t have if you hadn’t moved back…
Shut up! Anthony’s right for you! Even your mother says so…
Liz hated it when she argued with herself. She never won. Unfortunately she was doing it more and more often.
The light in the supply closet was already on as Liz pushed open the door. A man was standing in the back, trying to balance an arm full of construction paper, glue, and safety scissors. The pile suddenly dropped.
Groaning, he stooped to gather the mess. That was when he saw Elizabeth.
Straightening up, the two stared at each for about three seconds. Then he said, "I take it this isn’t the Men’s Room."
Liz snickered, then caught herself. Squaring her shoulders, she turned to the left shelf and started to hunt.
"My name is Ramone. Ramone Bates."
"Elizabeth Patterson."
"Well, Elizabeth Patterson, is there anything I can help you with?"
"No," She said stiffly. "I can find it myself."
"Oh. Ok." He placed the mess on a shelf and tried to straighten it into a pile.
"You know," Said Liz, not turning to look at him. "When I have a lot to grab out of here, I take a student along to help me." Where was that pencil sharpener?
"That’s a good idea," Said Ramone. "I’ll do that next time. So," He continued. "You teach second grade, right?"
"That’s right. Are you new?"
"Uh-huh. I just transferred from our sister school in Thunder Bay." He added, "I teach the LD students." He wasn’t that tall, just a hair above Liz, with ash brown hair. His eyes reminded her of Scarlett O’Hara, bright green and tilted slightly with long lashes. They were unusually girlish, but didn’t take away from the masculinity of the rest of his face.
"Good luck with that." Elizabeth grabbed the sharpener and left without saying goodbye.
You were awfully rude Liz, She chided herself. The guy is new. You could at least be friendly…
Someone in her classroom yelled, "Ow! Stop pulling my ponytail you jerk!" Elizabeth forgot all about Ramone Bates and LD students and hurried inside, ready to stop a fight before it started.
---
Lunch couldn’t come soon enough. Liz had forgotten to pack a lunch, so she was forced to buy from the cafeteria.
Turkey slices (The gravy no doubt one of those just add water concoctions), potato wedges, and canned peaches. It looked disgusting. And the kids were forced to pay for this mess? Liz grabbed an M&M cookie from near the register and plopped down the tray.
As she fished out the two dollars (One twenty-five, plus seventy-five cents for the cookie), the woman taking the money shook her head. "I’m sorry, but you can’t have a treat until you finish your lunch."
Liz thought she was joking, until she took the cookie away. "Hey, wait a minute…"
"Rules are rules."
"But I’m not a student!"
The cashier seemed to be enjoying this. "Maybe after you’re done, I’ll let you have it back."
Liz suddenly felt the urge to ram her tray over the old hag’s head and down her neck. But before she could consider acting on it, a voice interrupted, "Give her back the cookie."
Liz turned to see Ramone behind her. "C’mon, stop being a pain, Lady. There are kids waiting."
"The rules clearly state…" Ramone snatched the cookie. He plunked down the three quarters, in addition to his own money, and went his way.
The cashier stood aghast. "Wait a minute…"
Liz quickly put down her money, and without waiting for change, followed Ramone. She could hear students cheering after her.
In the lounge, she sat next to him. "I could’ve handled that on my own…" She paused. "But thank you."
Ramone gave her the cellophane wrapped treat. Liz reached into her pocket to give him the change, but he waved it away. "All you owe me is a bite."
"So," Liz stuck her Spork in her turkey. "Why’d you help me?"
Ramone shrugged into his salad. "It seemed like the right thing to do." He took a bite, made a face, then put his napkin over his mouth and spit it out. "This is gross."
"Want some of mine? It’s probably not much better," Liz offered, but Ramone shook his head. "I’m a vegetarian. A lacto-ovo vegetarian to be more specific."
"You don’t eat meat, but you eat eggs and diary products," Said Liz.
Ramone looked impressed. "Very good. Most people look at me as if I’ve got a daisy sprouting out of my head when I say that. I would probably be a pescatarian, but I hate fish." He pushed aside his lunch. "I can’t believe they make the kids eat this slop! This lettuce is obviously wilted and the dressing smells weird! The only good food in here is the cherry tomatoes!"
"Have some peaches," Liz offered and he obliged. "I’ve heard the kids complaining about the lunches, but I figured it was just kid stuff. I complained about the school lunches when I was their age, but it was caviar compared this."
"Someone ought to complain."
"But then they’d need to come up with new food ideas. Start a committee…"
"Get some of the kids involved. After all, it’s their lunch…" Ramone and Elizabeth looked at each other, and she knew they had the same idea.
"I could draw up a plan," She offered. "We can show it to the principal."
"Great, and I can find some new lunch ideas!" Ramone looked genuinely excited. "Liz, why don’t we have dinner tonight?"
Liz felt blush creeping up her cheeks. "What?"
"To discuss the lunch project!" He added quickly. "Not like a date or anything…" He started to blush too. "Unless you want it to be…"
"I’m kind of involved with somebody," Liz mumbled. You’re engaged, Stupid! Tell him you’re engaged! You didn’t have any problems telling Warren!
I know. So why does it feel like my mouth’s glued shut?
Aloud she said, "I already made plans for tonight."
"Oh." He shrugged. "That’s cool. Let me know if you change your mind. I’m free every night except Thursdays." He smiled sheepishly. "I know it’s dorky, but I’m nuts about CSI…"
---
As Liz drove robotically to Anthony’s house, her mind swam. Ideas and thoughts crammed themselves inside her brain and tried to make themselves number one. Her mind often felt like a TV, flipping back and forth between channels. She wondered if she was ADD.
More varieties of fruit. We need more varieties of fruit on the menu. Fresh fruit, not stuff from a can.
He seems so nice, and we have stuff in common. The only thing Anthony and I have in common anymore is jigsaw puzzles. I feel like Susan from ‘Citizen Kane’ every time I go over there.
Stop it, Liz. Anthony is the right one for you. Are you going to be swayed by some guy you just met?
We should really have reusable plastic trays instead of Styrofoam. It’s more environmentally friendly.
Why would you want anyone besides Anthony anyway? After all, he did save you from Howard…
Liz stopped at a red light. Yes. Yes, Anthony had saved her when Howard attacked her in Lawrence’s shop. He even offered to drive her home…
Wait a minute! Liz frowned. He didn’t drive me home! He drove me to the park and asked me to wait for him! And he was still married!
Why hadn’t she ever thought about that? At the time, she was still stunned and vulnerable, but now that three years had passed, she was beginning to see the situation with fresh eyes.
He shouldn’t have done that.
No, he shouldn’t have. Finally! Finally something the two parts of her mind could agree on!
She was in Anthony’s driveway now. She couldn’t remember the last fifteen minutes from the school to his house, but she didn’t care. Anger was simmering inside her.
The door opened and little Francie ran out to greet her. "Eliza’beff! Eliza’beff!" She wrapped herself around Liz’s knees.
"Hey there," Liz rubbed her dark hair. "Did you have a good day?"
Francie nodded. "I read five books today!"
"You did?" She followed Liz up the walk.
"Uh-huh! I read ‘Busy, Busy Town’ and-and ‘The Little Red Hen’ and ‘Where the Wild Things are’ and ‘The Big Road Race’ and ‘Wednesday is S’getti Day!’"
"That’s wonderful, Francie! You’re very smart!" Liz stepped inside and hung her coat in the closet.
"Elizabeth, is that you?"
No, it’s Cap’n Crunch, Dumbass. "Yes, Anthony, I’m here!"
Her beau emerged from the kitchen, wearing an apron and oven mitts. "Well, go ahead and sit down! The turnip bacon mash is ready!"
"Daddy," Said Francie. "Liz doesn’t like turnips! Remember?"
I can’t believe the three year old can remember that and her father can’t!
"Nonsense, Francie!" Anthony laughed. "Of course Liz likes turnips!"
"I despise them, Anthony," Liz said, colder than she intended. "I told you. I put it on that list."
Anthony’s smile vanished. "Oh, well…we have PBJ…"
"No, I’ll be ok." Liz sighed. "Let’s just eat!"
---
After dinner, Liz and the Caines watched a show on rainforest insects. As the program turned from praying mantises to dung beetles, the two noticed Francie had fallen asleep, and Anthony scooped her up and carried her to bed.
Finding herself alone, Liz turned from the boring documentary to a CSI rerun. She pulled her knees up on the couch and became absorbed in the episode she’d already seen twenty-two times.
Liz was so engrossed, she failed to notice, ten minutes later when Anthony re-entered the living room. She was startled to his voice, saying, "Oh no, not this show! I don’t let Francie watch this!" The channel clicked back to the dung beetles.
"Francie’s in bed." Liz said testily. "It won’t bother her."
"No, no, no, no! Too violent! I don’t allow it in my house!" Anthony sat down on the sofa next to her and frowned. "Please, don’t put your feet on the couch."
"I’m not even wearing shoes!" He pointed to the floor and Liz rolled her eyes, moving her socked feet to the rug.
"For your information, that happens to be my favorite show!"
"Liz, I hope you’re not critiquing my parenting skills!"
Liz had to keep from shouting. "Your parenting skills? Francie’s asleep! If you don’t want to watch in front of her, fine, but don’t tell me what to watch!"
"Liz, you can watch what you want in your house," Replied Anthony. "But in my house, I have certain restrictions."
Liz felt the blood rushing to her head. "We’re getting married! What are we going to do then?"
"Well," Anthony replied. "You’ll just have to give it up!"
"THAT’S IT!" Liz jumped off the sofa.
"What’s it?" Anthony looked startled. "Liz, it’s just a TV show, and not a very good one…"
"It’s not the show!" She began to pace. "It’s you! It’s us! It’s just all wrong!"
"I don’t understand."
Liz plopped back down next to him. "Anthony, when Howard Bunt tried to rape me…"
"Now, now," Anthony interrupted. "We don’t know that that was his intent…"
"Shut the hell up, Anthony!" He looked startled. "When he tried to rape me, and you saved me, why didn’t you take me to the police?"
"Huh?"
"The police, you nit! Why did you drive me to the police? Why did you take me to the park and ask me to wait for you? I had just been attacked, and you had the audacity to ask me to wait for you?" She looked disgusted.
"Liz," He grasped her hands, which she pulled away. "I was coming to ask you to wait for me anyway. It was just a coincidence that I showed up at the same moment that Howard assaulted you."
"Well, you sure have lousy timing!" Liz snapped.
"But Liz," He was whining. "I love you! I’ve always loved you!"
"What about when you were with Therese?" She snapped. "Did you love me then?"
"Of course!"
"Then you shouldn’t have married her!" No wonder she hated me!" She bent down and grabbed her shoes. "That poor woman. All those times you said she had no reason to be jealous of me and that we were just friends, it was all just a steaming pile of shit!"
"Elizabeth, please don’t use that kind of language."
"You know what?" She popped back up from tying her sneakers. "This isn’t going to work, Anthony. We’re not going to work." She stood and pulled off her engagement ring.
"Wait, Liz!" Anthony stood up. "At least think about it!"
"I have. Believe me." She put the ring in his palm. "It’s over. It should’ve been over years ago."
"But-but I love you!" He followed her to the living room door. "Remember all the fun times we had? When we hung out at the mall, school projects, graduation…"
"No, you love the girl you dated in high school!" Liz turned. "You don’t even know me! Not anymore."
"What about Francie?" Anthony whined again. "She needs a mother! And she’ll miss you!"
"Don’t you dare try and manipulate me, Anthony Caine! Don’t you dare! Besides," Liz felt anger evaporating like steam. "You were doing fine as a single parent before I came along, and you’ll keep doing fine when I leave." She finished, "Goodbye Anthony. We won’t be seeing each other again."
As Liz got in her car, she felt the urge to stop by the Tiny Train House. She needed someone to talk to, and she knew her mother would always be supportive.
---
"YOU BROKE UP WITH ANTHONY?" Elly shrieked. In her bathrobe and long, mane-like hair with her saggy face line and bulbous nose, she almost resembled a Muppet.
"It was the right thing to do."
"Oh Elizabeth," Elly slunk down to the table. Looking like Liz had just confessed to bombing Hiroshima, she reached over and clutched her teacup. "How could you? I mean, how could you?"
"He was always patronizing me, Mom," Liz said calmly, though her patience was wearing thin. "Besides, Anthony only loved me for who I once was. He doesn’t know me now, he just has a fantasy of what I’m from over ten years ago."
"Oh but Elizabeth," Elly said again. "I thought you wanted to get married! I thought you wanted a nice house and a husband and children! Anthony can provide all of that!"
"I do want a nice house and a husband and children," Liz replied. "Someday. But not with Anthony. Besides, when I do marry, I want to be with someone I’m passionately and completely in love with. Anthony and I just have a lukewarm compatibility."
"I’m quite sure," Elly continued, as if Liz hadn’t spoken. "That if you just call him up and apologize, you two can…"
Liz had had enough. "What aren’t you getting?" She seethed, standing up from the table. "I…don’t…want…to…be…with…Anthony! Ok? It’s over! Even if you don’t agree with my decision, at least support me in it! Why are you so dead set on my being with him anyway?"
"A mother knows these things, Elizabeth dear," Said Elly. "Besides, you two remind me of your father and I, when we were your age. Of course," Elly sniffed. "I had a baby. In my day, no one waited to see where life took them! We did the proper thing by settling down and raising families, just like your brother is…"
"Oh yeah," Liz rolled her eyes. "He’s a great family man! He only left his wife and kids on the fire escape in the dead of winter to run into a burning building! To get a laptop!"
"It had his manuscript on it."
"Which he had two other copies of!" Liz growled. "I don’t know why I expected you to support me. All you’ve ever done is talk Anthony up like he’s Mahatma Freakin’ Ghandi!" Liz stalked out of the kitchen.
"He’s like a son to your father and I!" Elly called after her.
Liz poked her head back in the room and snarled, "Then adopt him!"
---
Elizabeth entered her kitchen and grabbed a trash bag. As she threw half-empty cartons of Chinese food away, she began to think.
Mom doesn’t understand. I thought she would, but it’s like she wants me to live the same life she and Dad live.
It doesn’t matter, She decided, sticking the bag in the can. I finally made a choice that was good for me, and not what everyone expected. No matter what, I believe in my decision.
There was an open bottle of rum on the counter. Unconsciously, she picked it up and stuck the neck in her mouth. She started to swig, then stopped. She looked at it, then tossed it in the garbage.
I believe in my decision. Liz picked up the phone and dialed. Picking up Shiimsa and cradling her in her arms, Liz balanced the phone between her neck and ear. "Ramone? It’s Liz. Remember when you asked about having dinner together? Yeah, how about tomorrow? I know this organic food buffet downtown. All right! And Ramone? Let’s call it a date…"
---
Liz and Ramone were seated near a window. He was wearing a sweater with a vegetable design (carrots, tomatoes, and peppers in rows.) and Liz had dressed up for the first time in what seemed like ages. She was wearing a nice lavender dress with a button up front, and she had pulled back her hair with matching lavender barrettes. "We should do an All Fruit Day," Said Ramone. "My mom used to do that for dinner once or twice a summer. She’d put all this fruit out on the table and we’d just help ourselves!"
"That sounds great," Said Liz. "My mom tried to make us eat healthier, but after awhile, she just gave up and started feeding us casseroles."
Being with Ramone feels right, Thought Liz as she sipped her water. She had only known him for two days, but they were already finishing each other’s sentences.
Liz reached across the table and took Ramone’s hand. He seemed surprised but happy as he accepted the gesture.
As they leaned closer to each other, Liz suddenly felt happiness swell inside. It had been two years since she left Mtigwaki, but she had finally come home.
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