As much as I love the holidays, I'm glad the hectic Christmas schedule is almost over. I ate well these last few days, counting everything but going over my points each day. I can't eat much in one sitting, but I can put away a lot of Chex Mix in small quantities multiple times during the day! LOL I'll make up for it and get my mojo back tomorrow. I don't feel guilty for eating some fun foods or probably gaining a little this week. I KNOW what to do to lose it and get back on track, but mostly I WANT to lose it and get back on track. My life is not about food. It's about being healthy. I don't lose that focus with just a few fat-filled goodies.

The Thanksgiving Trip
	My husband and I went to Arkansas this Thanksgiving to visit his mother and sisters, and my aunt, uncle and cousin. We made a few stops along the way (see below and my WW friends link). Here we are with my sister-in-law and her husband in their restaurant, Hot Dog Alley, in Bentonville, AR. I stayed on plan all week with only a few special "extras" and I was rewarded with a .7-pound loss this week! Not bad. Not bad at all. Especially considering my evil sister-in-law introduced me to Hershey's candy coated mini Kisses. Grrr.....

Let's Go to Memphis in the Meantime, Baby
	We couldn't do the tour of Graceland today because we were pressed for time, but I at least got my picture taken next to the sign and with a cutout of Elvis in the Heartbreak Hotel lobby! This was taken at 8:30 this morning in 35 degree weather with lots of wind, but I took my jacket off anyway for the photo. Brrr....... I am keeping track of my points this week on paper. I miss my own cooking. Eating out is not a lot of fun for me, so traveling is tough. I'm now at my sister-in-laws in Bella Vista, Arkansas, so I bought stuff for my favorite breakfast - a spinach, mushroom and feta omelet - to eat the rest of the week. I'm staying on plan, no doubt about it. I just have to be creative is all.

November 4 - The Body Fat Thingy
	When I met up with Carol, Chris, Mary and Gina today in Pittsburgh, Carol brought along the body fat calculator thingy that she borrowed from work so I could do a body fat measurement. Keep in mind my goal is to fall in the 22-25 percent body fat range. At 1:30 p.m. my body fat percentage was 29.2 percent. At 3:30, after a Rice Crispy Bar and coffee with half and half at Starbucks, it was 29.5. Hmmm..... Mary assured me that body fat percentage shifts during the day. Oh well, in the overall scheme of things I fall into the "average" category. Not bad. My goal is still to fit into the "leaner than average category" and so I dutifully soldier on. Here I am gripping the body fat thingy to calculate said body fat percentage (and that's my blue beast of a Jeep we're standing next to. Mary's in the background thinking, no doubt, that I'm nuts):

October 29
	I put two photos side by side from my heaviest to what I am today. A picture is worth 143 pounds.

	October 15 Last week I began a reflective journey which I suspect will last awhile. Getting a new driver's license (see previous post below) and looking at old photos of me at my heaviest made me incredibly sad and anxious. Sad that I looked like that and didn't really truly see it and anxious that I could gain it all back and look like that again. Sad, also, because I feel contempt and pity for the woman I once was based SOLELY on my weight. I don't feel contempt or anger toward other people who are overweight, so why do treat myself like that? I'm also close to my original goal weight of 150. I am shocked by the image I see in the mirror because I don't recognize myself. In my mind I'm heavier, perhaps not 300 pounds, but certaintly not a size 10/12. I took some time this weekend to observe my butt in the mirror. Yes, my butt. A source of angst since forever. And as I looked at my butt in the mirror I realized it's not that big anymore. It's not what I think it is is my minds eye. So I've resolved to look, really look, at myself in the mirror more often so I can get to know this new image. I went to a wedding yesterday of a friend and former co-worker. I have one photo on my homepage of me in it with my friend, Pam. Here is one of me with my good friend and former editor. I felt good in that dress. Sexy even. It was clingy enough to show plenty of flaws, particularly in the lower abdomen, but you know what? I still felt good in it. And I wasn't embarrassed. I've got a lot of emotional work to do. I have enormous fears and anxieties to overcome as I get closer to goal. For those of you reading this who are on a weight loss journey, don't think for one second that getting thinner solves any problems except physical limitations. It's easy at a higher weight to say "I wish I had YOUR problem" or "I'd gladly trade places with you" (I used to think that all the time when I'd hear people close to goal relay similar fears and anxieties). Close to goal is not what you might think it is.

October 11, 2006
	So I was walking past the Department of Motor Vehicles in our local mall and, realizing it was "photo" day, I decided to go in and see if they'd issue me a duplicate drivers license since the photo on my current one was taken 140 pounds ago. Not only did they agree, but everyone said they'd never had anyone come in and ask for a new photo for such a dramatic change before. And who said the DMV couldn't be fun? Because of the watermark it's hard to see the photos clearly, but here's my new and old drivers license: As of today I am 155.3 pounds. I get pretty hungry every day since I've upped my exercise to 45 minutes cardio (burn about 350 calories) and 20-30 minutes of strength training (another 100 calories) so I've started eating those calories (called Activity Points on Weight Watchers). It makes a huge difference in my energy level and I'm still losing well.