Luigi Mario

QUARTER MUNCHERS

By: MattDDR

Quarter munchers.....

Everybody knows them, or, at least, they SHOULD by now.

And if you say you don't, YOU LIE!

But maybe you were playing a Quarter Muncher back in the day, and you didn't even realize it. If you didn't, allow me to take a few mintues to wake you up.

So, WHAT, exactly, is a Quarter Muncher? Well, almost anyone should know, but here's my own definition for those who don't. Basically, a Quarter Muncher is an Arcade game that requires that you put in a lot of credits into it before you actually beat the game, or, to even get far in before you finally lose your mind enough to want to stop playing, because the game is so cheap and long, that you just wanna rip someone's head off. Well, let's face it, almost ANY arcade game of the past was a quarter muncher, but if you want to look at some REALLY elusive ones, then check out this list that I've put together of some of the WORST Quarter Munchers in history. They won't be in any particular order, but still, the point will be crystal clear.

Double Dragon III: The Rosetta Stone

As has been mentioned before, THIS game was definetly a headache. NOT ONLY did it suck with it's stupid storyline, shotty animation, horrible graphics, deplorable sound, and cheap gameplay, it had that system where when you entered the shop, you had to put money into the machine to buy the upgrades for Billy, Jimmy, and.......Sonny. Plus, you had to put money in to buy extra energy, and the other characters featured in the game. Of course, NONE of these were really that much of help. Like I said, the gameplay was SO unfair, there would be no point in even TRYING to go all the way through, especially when you reach(this still makes me laugh hearing it) "Cleo "Freakin' Cheap As Hell" Patra". lol. But yeah. This is definetly one to be avoided.

Battletoads

Yep. That's right. Battletoads actually had an arcade version. In THIS one, I didn't really see any type of storyline, so I guess the Toads are trying to stop the Dark Queen.....again. This was only one of the two Battletoads games that you could use all three toads in(Battletoads Double Dragon being the other one). I'm not gonna lie. The Graphic quality is spectacular. So much so that some of the graphics are qualified to be rated M for Mature...seriously. The music and sound are absoulutely awesome, and so is the gameplay. It's actually a very fun game....So...."What makes it a Quarter Muncher?" you might be asking. Well, y'see that energy bar at the top of the screen? Well, if you play, DON'T get used to it always beong at max, because it definetly won't always be at max. Plus, when an enemy hits you, your energy will REALLY feel the strain, as it sometimes will almost be completly gone once the enemy ceases it's combo attack, and to make it even WORSE, the Toads only have flies that randomly pop out of nowhere and they don't recover barely any of your life. And don't even get me started on the Bosses....Either way, I Guarantee you, NO ONE can beat this game with just one credit.

Ninja Combat

This is one of the first NEO-GEO games I saw on display. Back then, I thought NEO-GEO was the best. We all did, at one point, or another(Admit it. You know you did). But, upon retrospect, this game was just down-right awful. Maybe it was something back then, but that was back then. Now, if you play this game, you'll see exactly what I'm talking about. The graphics were ok, but the sound was kinda shotty, and the speaking roles just sounded pathetic, almost as if they were on one of those paid-advertisement programs. The Control was pretty much on-point, but the gameplay was unmerciful. I couldn't get past most of the bosses without using my Special move, which, BTW, drained one of your health points. Also, you only had 4 health bars, and a smack from some of the bosses would take away 3 of them.....THREE OF THEM!!!!! Which meant that lives would go away VERY fast. So you'd HAVE to keep puting Quarters/Tokens/Whatever the arcade took as currency to beat it, if you could stand to.

Crime Fighters

This probably goes on the very top of the list as one of the biggest Quarter Munchers of all time. Probably even more of one than DD III. Here's how it went down, for energy, you get a number counter, and you can't recover life with food items because they don't exist in this game. You wanna know how to recover life with this one? Put in more money. That's right, the more money you put in, the more energy you have throughout the game. But, like I said, it's a number counter, which means, as you go on throughout the game, your evergy will slowly count down, and once it reaches 0, that's it. Game Over. There's s no possible way on planet earth ANYONE could beat this with one Quarter. Wanna know why? Well, for instance, you can't just beat the thugs up any old way. Well, actually, you can, but you have to knock them down for them to die. It isn't like other games where you just keep pummeling the bad guys until they fall and die, you absolutely HAD to hit them three times in a row without missing or stopping(and that part is hard too) to knock them down. And the bosses DON'T get knocked down, until you hit them enough times to do so, and they're all guaranteed cheap. So, yeah. You'll need a BAG full of change to beat this one. But the good part about all of this is that when you're about to die, they'll be sure to let you know about it....

Almost Any SNK Game

Everyone HAS to agree with THIS one, especially when it comes to the KOF series. Despite how good the games are, they're all way too cheap. In almost every KOF, there'll be a Boss at the end that you just can't seem to get past at the start, and it'll take credit, after credit, after credit to do so. It is, without question, nerve-racking. Now, at least, it isn't as bad as Crime Fighters, but it's still good enough to be considered a Quarter Muncher. There's really nothing more to be said about it.

It isn't just THESE games either. There are PLENTY of games out there considered to be Quarter Munchers. But, as you can see, these games DO in fact, exist, in some form or another. Looking back now, I wonder if arcades and game creaters were trying to deliver the next great challenge, or using a these as a tool to get much richer. I mean, Street Fighter MAY have been a Quarter Muncher, but that was pretty much against another player. Against the Computer, it wasn't really that much to fuss over, y'know. But, yeah. Next time you're out at that old school arcade, or even some of the arcades of today, one thing you may always want to do.......

Whatever you do......BEWARE THE QUARTER MUNCHERS!!!!!!!!!!!