It was probably the worst day to go out for a walk. It was raining so hard and it was cold, very cold. As I was walking all the events of the other day played over and over in my head.
"I-I'm sorry Jon I just can't do this right now... I'm not ready." The next thing I knew he had hit me and was on top of me. I'll never forget the next thing that he said to me. "Now you're mine whore."
I never would have thought that he'd do that to me but I guess I was wrong because he did. He was my best friend, my boyfriend, my everything. I trusted him with so much and he used that against me. I was now in an empty park and I collapsed and cried. I'm glad that that was the time I decided to go for a walk because with the rain kissing my face nobody could tell that with those raindrops were tears. "Is it worth it anymore? Is the pain of what he did to me worth it?" I wondered out loud. It hurt so much! I had never had sex with anyone before and when he raped me it hurt!
"Jon stop it please it hurts!" I cried. "Oh stop your whimpering you know that you're liking it." The look in his eyes was one of a ferocity that I'd never see in him before. "No Jon please it hurts."
The look in his eyes is one that I will never forget. I had always wanted to save myself for after marriage but he took that away from me; he took everything away from me. By now I was up and walking, who knows where, just walking somewhere, anywhere but here. He was supposed to be my best friend, he was supposed to protect me not hurt me. I trusted him with my life and he abused it.
I didn't know what to do and I hadn't told anyone yet. He had told me that if i said a word to anyone he'd kill me. Never in my life had I been that afraid to go to bed or spend the night alone in my life! I really should tell someone but who? If I go to the police he could deny it all and then kill me, I thought to myself. I was so glad that we hadn't yet decided to move in together.
Chapter 2
By this time is had stopped raining and I was soaked to the bone. I had also decided on what to do. Going to the police was the only way that I could make sure that Jon couldn't do this to anyone else. As terrified as I was there was really no other choice, it needed to be done. I didn't want to go alone so I figured going with someone that I knew and was very close to; my mom. I pulled out my cell phone and dialed my mom's number. "Hello?" my mom said. "Hi mom it's Steph. I need you to meet me at the police station. Please don't ask questions you'll find out when you get there I just need someone to go with me." I knew that that wouldn't be the best way to tell my mom but I also didn't want to say it over the phone just incase anyone overheard me. "Alright. I'll be there as fast as is humanly possible," my mom said rather quickly and nervously.
"If you breath a word to anyone it will be your last!" Jon said with a malicious tone in his voice, "Get your clothes on and get out of my fucking house!" He'd never been like that before I don't know what changed. "Okay I'm sorry, I'm going as fast as I can. Please don't hurt me again!"
As I was walking to the station, consumed in my thoughts, I almost got hit by a car. BEEEEEEEP "I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention," I said rather quietly and partially to myself. "Watch where you're going!!" screamed the cab driver as he slammed on his brakes. Finally after what seemed like an eternity I reached the station to see my mother and Jon standing outside. My heart almost stopped when I saw him and I could see that same look in his eyes. To keep my mothers suspicions down I walked calmly over to Jon and gave him a hug and kiss. "I warned you bitch if you say anything to the police about me I will kill you," he hissed into my ear quiet enough for only me to hear. At this point I was terrified and tried to tell my mom with my eyes and body language but that didn't work so well. "What's wrong sweetie?" my mom said impatiently. "I-I... well I just uhm wanted to report a burglary. That's all." I was so nervous and could barely keep my voice steady. I knew that my mom wouldn't be impressed by me but I really had to find a way to keep her there and get rid of Jon but I knew that if I did that he would become suspicious and probably come looking for me later that night.
Chapter 3
"So you brought me all the way here in a panic because of a burglary? Here I was thinking that it was something serious like rape and all it's only a burglary!" My mom was furious but I couldn't tell her not right then not with Jon around. "Well i think we should go now Kathy" Jon said with the most polite tone in his voice and the most dark and terrifying look in his eyes. Mother never knew him well enough to see the different looks in his eyes and apparently she didn't know me well enough either, to know that something was wrong.
After my mom and Jon left me alone I went over to my friend Kylie's house. she had known me for so long that when she opened up the door and I was standing there soaked to the bone, something was wrong. "Steph what's wrong? Come in come in! You're soaking, I'll go get you a change of clothed just hang on a second okay?" she said so sincerely that I almost started bawling right there. When she came back with some dry clothes and a cup of hot chocolate I hugged her and started to cry. "Aww sweetie. Shhhhhhhhhh don't cry, why don't we sit down and you tell me what happened okay?" I knew I had to tell someone sooner or later otherwise it would keep tearing me up inside. "He raped me Kylie. Jon raped me the other day and he told me that if I said a word to anyone he would kill me! I'm so scared Kylie I don't know what to do!" I blurted out between the tears. "Okay slow down and tell me everything you can remember." She hugged me and tried to calm me down a little before letting me try to continue.
"Well first he took me out for dinner and everything was fine. The dinner was great and we had a good time! the next thing I knew we were at his apartment and we were talking about the future. He asked me about marriage, kids and all the stuff. We then started making out and it went a little to far. I told him to stop and that I wasn't ready, that I wanted to wait until i was married before i had sex. He wouldn't take no for an answer so I pushed him off of me and then he hit me so hard it almost knocked me out. After that I can't really remember much other than it hurt and I kept asking him to stop because it hurt so much. After he finally got the 'high' he wanted he pulled himself out of me and told me to get dressed and get out. As i was walking out the door he hissed to me that if I breathed a word to anyone it would be the last. God Kylie I've never seen that side of him before and I don't know what to do! i'm so scared! Please don't leave me alone I don't want to be alone anymore!" Recalling what he did to me was much harder than I though that it would be but it was something that needed to be done and I knew that now I had to go back to the police and tell them what happened.
"Aww sweetie that's horrible! have you told the police yet?! I'll go with you if you want me to?" she said after i told her what happened. I nodded, got changed and she drove with me to the station. After we were inside the station she asked if we could talk to someone about a crime. When we finally got in to see someone they asked me what happened and I couldn't say it again it was too hard. "Kylie can you please tell them I just can't do it again" I said with tears brimming at my eyes.
Chapter 4
"Well Officer, the other night she went out for dinner with her boyfriend and things were going great then they went back to his place, things got a little heated and when she stopped him he got mad and then raped her." Kylie said. The officer than turned to me and asked me for specific details. "We were making out and I told him to stop because I wanted to wait until after I was married. There was a hunger in his eyes that I had never seen before. He didn't stop so I pushed him off of me and then he got angry and hit me. It hurt so much!" I said loudly. I didn't want to coninue because it was so painful but i knew that I had to it was the only thing to do at this point. "After that the rest is blurry. I can only remember the pain and asking Jon to stop because it hurt so much. I had never had sex before so it hurt and when he was finished with me he told me to get out of is house. As I was walking out he told me that if I told anyone that would be the last thing I ever did." By now the tears were streaming down my face again and I was shaking so bad I could barely speak. "Alright thank you very much we will get him to come down to the station. Do you have somewhere to stay; somewhere where he won't expect that you'll be?" asked the Officer so softly I could barely hear him, or maybe that was because of the ringing in my ears...
When we were done talking to the officer, Kylie took me back to her house and got some clothes and stuff for me so I could stay with her. "Thank you so much for letting me stay here with you! You're the best friend anyone could ever have!" "No problem sweetie! You know i have the space and you're my best friend!" She then hugged me and i never really noticed before how well our bodies fit together. I had always known that I was bisexual and I had always thought that Kylie was gorgeous but I had never really thought of her as anything more than a friend; until now.
"Kylie you're open to anything aren't you? Like you wouldn't judge someone because of something?" I asked rather nervously. She had known me for almost 10 years and she didn't know that I was bi, I wanted to tell her, but I was so scared as to how she would take it so I never said anything. She looked at me kind of funny and responded, "Yeah. Why is there something you want to tell me?" Damn she can read me so well sometimes! I thought. "Well uhm yeah... I just don't want it to change your opinion of me, that's all." "Nothing can change my opinion of you unless you like killed someone. You're my best friend and i've known you for 10 years!" she said with this look on her face of total confusion. "Yeah I guess" I laughed. "You see I'm bisexual and in the time that I've known you I've come to love you. you've always shown me such love and care that sometimes I almost thought that you felt the same for me that I did for you." I said blushing furiously. After saying that there was this really uncomfortable silence, something we haven't had for quite some time. "Well that's cool because so am I" Kylie said after what seemed like an eternity. I was totally surprised and excited at the same time I could hardly contain myself.
The Darkness
“Hey mom I am home” I put my school bag down on the chair in the kitchen as I went for some food in the fridge. “Hi, how was your day at school?” asked my mom. “It was okay, I am tired I am going to take a nap okay?” I asked or rather said it impatiently. “Yeah that’s fine don’t sleep too long or you won’t be able to sleep tonight” she sounded like she was really busy so I didn’t bother to respond I just went to sleep.
I was dreaming that I was on another planet. One very similar to my own but very different at the same time. It had mountains, great oceans, many forests and many cities very much like my own city. But this world seemed very different at the same time, it was really hard to explain. In my dream I felt like it meant something that I was on a different planet. Maybe I was meant to end up there someday, but who knows… When I woke up 3 hours later I felt different as if I was compelled to go somewhere. So I grabbed some money and went out driving, driving towards what I am not sure but I drove where ever I felt an aurora, a presence a place I needed to be. It eventually led me to a house, it looked deserted but then again looks are deceiving. This house wasn’t deserted, it was very much full of stuff. This stuff looked like a transporter of some sort. I felt I was here to get transported some place, maybe to that world in my dream, that world that was so similar to mine and so different all at the same time, the world I felt so compelled to go and visit. For some very odd reason I felt like there was a reason that I was supposed to go, like some sort of mission that I needed to do but maybe not… So I stepped onto this so-called “transporter” and I felt this sudden whoooooshing sensation, a sensation like I had never felt before.
I opened my eyes and I was on the world in my dream, lying on the beach or what I guessed was a beach, it looked like one anyways… I got up and started walking towards a cave I figured that I could sleep in there for the night. As the darkness enclosed me, I heard movement but I couldn’t tell where from. Then it was quiet again. I stood in the darkness for about half an hour then I heard movement again but this time it was clearer, closer almost but still too dim to know where it was coming from. Then I heard a voice... “Why are you here?” It asked. I stuttered replying “I-I am not sure, I want some answers, Can you give them to me?” The voice didn’t answer right away, it was almost like it was trying to read my mind but couldn’t. “What are your questions?” It then asked. “I want to know what my mission is in this world, What am I doing here and Who or what am I supposed to do/help during my stay?” again a pause... “I do not know the answers to those questions” it then replied. After that I saw a distant light and my instinct told me to walk towards it even though I didn’t know where it led to or where it had come from. It felt like I was walking for hours before it got any closer but it did get closer little by little finally after walking for what seemed like an eternity I got to the opening. I had to squint because the light was so bright but when I could see again I noticed I was standing on a cliff, I blinked and the view changed from standing on the edge of a cliff to walking on a nice sandy beach with waves crashing all around you, seagulls screeching and people laughing. I blinked again and yet again the view smoothly changed from beach to the edge of a rain forest with amazingly tall trees and exotic animals. I was totally amazed I wondered what I was looking at or through rather. I put my hands out in front of me and I felt nothing no glass, no plastic, nothing. Just then I fell forward. I put my hands in front of me to catch myself. When I got up I was back in the dark with no light, like it was before. It was almost as if I had been dreaming; dreaming a wonderful dream about I world I no longer knew. Then the voice spoke again “That was the world you used to know?” It asked. I waited a moment before I responded, “Yes that is my home world, the world I used to live on before I turned up here.” Another pause this one longer than before... It seemed like both the voice and I were thinking, about who knows what but we were thinking about things I guess. Me, I was thinking about my home, my family and the friends all of which I am guessing I will never see again. “Okay you can leave now” the voice said. I then saw a door out of this place and into the unknown world around me.
I started to walk towards the beach that I had found myself lying on when I first came to this world. I was intrigued by the sound of the waves and the rhythm that they had, they made me want to fall asleep. “I need to find a place to sleep for the night” I said allowed to myself, “I can help you there” I turned around and saw a person walking behind me, they must have heard me talking to myself… “Umm okay how can you help me?” I asked. “Well I own a hotel that you can stay at for the night for free”. This person seemed genuine but I was still a little skeptical, I mean they say that I can stay for free but how am I to know that they really mean it? “Okay you lead the way…” I said. As me and this person walked away from the cave I just spent what seemed like hours in I felt this sense of loss, I don’t know why, but I did. “Oh well,” I thought to myself “it’s probably nothing.” We walked for a while and then got to her car. “What’s your name?” I asked. I felt I needed to know this very generous person, befriend them, get to know them and maybe I was here to help them but who knows, I mean I certainly don’t. “My name is Keela” she responded. “Nice name” I thought to myself. She looked like a normal person or rather what was normal to me, like a human being, maybe she was…
Next week…
So now I was getting to know people and Keela was becoming my best friend, she knew lots about me and I was getting to know her better to. She had some problems but then again so do we all. The more that I hung around her the more I felt that she was the one that I was here to help. She was a very nice person one of the nicest people that I know and I couldn’t see any reason why she was like that, not until I met her dad… Her dad was a very big man, not only tall but large. He was also very mean, as soon as we got there he started to swear and call Keela names she was so close to tears, I could see her eyes glistening. I felt so bad for her now I can understand why she is the way she is. “So…” she said, “What should we talk about now?” I really didn’t know what to say to her about her dad but I felt I needed to say something “You know that it’s okay to cry right?” I said. I could see that she wanted so much to cry and let it all out so it felt like the right thing to say to her. All of a sudden there was a flash of light and the transporter appeared beside me. “Well I guess its time for me to go home now” I said to her. “No you can’t leave I won’t let you!” she screamed at me. I felt really bad and so the thing I did next was something I didn’t know what she would think but I had to ask anyways, “Come with me, you can live with me on my world, we can have a great life together!!” So we stepped onto that transporter together she left it all behind and was making a fresh new start in a brand new world…