Lloyd Kaufman
The Interview PART 2!
This is part 2 of the Lloyd Kaufman interview...If you just joined us...why are you reading this part!? Read the part one first! Anyway, let's continue our interview....
Marcus:: You've directed yourself in a few films, do you find it difficult to direct yourself in a movie?
Lloyd:: Yes, it's horrible! In fact, if you get the Terror Firmer. . .have you seen Terror Firmer?
Marcus:: I have seen parts, but the copy I had, messed up so....
Lloyd:: Well maybe you can check that out...If you get
the DVD 
of "Terror Firmer" there is a documentary on the DVD of
"Terror Firmer" There is a second disc with a feature length
documentary called "Farts of Darkness: The Making Of Terror Firmer"
You can see that I didn't enjoy it. It is to much pressure! We have a tiny, tiny,
budget and all the pressure of production is on Michael and me. So for me to be
acting in a movie is "asshole time" We shouldn't be doing it BUT I
couldn't find anybody else who is old...and could act. Not that I can act! But I
was better then the old people coming in, let's put it that way. With old
people, if they are any good, they will be in the union, and we can't afford
them. And if they suck...they usually drop out of acting. And the old people
that were available for us sucked! The old people who sucked couldn't act for
shit! So I had to play that part in Terror Firmer. And I ended up just playing
myself basically. But you should see that documentary, Farts of Darkness you'll
see! It is very very stressful to say the least! Doing cameo's is ok but
that thing was just to much. But I had to do it cause we didn't have anybody
else.
Marcus:: Yeah I know the feeling, fans of my site will remember the ill fated "Horror on 138" movie that....yeah....
Lloyd:: You make your own movies?
Marcus:: Well...I have been trying to. . .
Lloyd:: Do you go to school?
Marcus:: Yeah, In college right now.
Lloyd:: Oh Great! Well they must have my book in there library! Usually the university libraries have it. You should check on it....if not they will get it. They all have film departments I am the only one who made a movie here. All the "make your own damn movie books" are by people who never made movies! I'm the only one! So they ought to get it! You should also have them show some Troma movies on campus....
Marcus:: Yeah I tried to get them to show the original Toxic Avenger but...
Lloyd:: Yeah, have them show Citizen Toxie! You should have
the do that! People love Troma movies or Tromeo and Juliet, go to the English
class! Everybody studies Shakespeare. The Professor, if he knows what Iambic-pentameter
IS he will be able to appreciate Tromeo and Juliet. Alot of Shakespeare classes show that movie. Alot of books about Shakespeare include that
movie. It's in iambic-pentameter and it's a very good adaptation of Romeo and
Juliet. Much better then that Baz Luhrman movie not that I am prejudice but I
can tell you that it is closer to Shakespeare then the DiCaprio one.
Marcus:: yeaaahh...the DiCaprio one was probably the worst rendentation of it that I have ever seen in my life!
Lloyd:: Yeah, it sucked! They didn't know what they were saying! All the actors in Tromeo and Juliet were Shakespeare scholars and they all knew what they were saying. And I don't think Baz Luhrman or that Dino (DiCaprio) I don't think they knew what they were saying.
Marcus:: Plus the fact I don't think putting it into the present was good idea either.
Lloyd:: Well...it COULD be, thats what is great about Shakespeare but they couldn't act. They are good actors but they couldn't do Shakespeare, they didn't know what they were saying, they didn't get it! They didn't understand what they were saying...anyway enough of that. I don't want to knock him to much.... It's not like he didn't make a masterpiece with Moulin Rouge. So Keep going!
Marcus:: Well one of the questions I had was Tell me about
your book....
Lloyd:: Make your own damn movie! just went into a second edition! And I think Oprah is going to put it on her book club pretty soon.
Marcus:: So it's becoming pretty big now?
Lloyd:: I think so...I think it's gonna be very successful...so maybe umm try and check it out as soon as you can.
Marcus:: Yeah definitely! I have been trying to find it but...
Lloyd:: Well if they don't have it...that means that they are sold out and you have to ask them for it. That is why Borders is good! They also have Troma DVD's in there like Terror Firmer,
Marcus:: I shall do that! Speaking of DVD's, what do your fans have to look forward to in the future?
Lloyd:: Well we will be releasing Tales from the Crapper
pretty soon after it finishes up. And all the Troma family are in that movie
like Joe Fly shaker, The Fat guy, Ron Jeremy is in it, Trey Parker, and Sam
Raimi...All these people are in it! So it will be a nice one to look at And then
parts in the family and the zombie movie. But then on DVD we got "All the
Love you Canne" Which is by the Canne film Festival which just came out. We
got "Amos and Andy", "Check and double Check" Which is a
classic film from the 30's...lets see what else...Jeffe town, You like retarded
people?
Marcus:: Yeah
Lloyd:: Well thats coming out any minute....Jeffe town....it's a about a retard who is a real mercer not a victim. He has got a girlfriend, and likes porno, and goes bowling, and got a job. It's a real reality....not the bullshit M.P.R shows. Have the retards your supposed to feel sorry for them but in this one, you respect them! Say Hey this guy is a good guy! He gets laid! It's really upbeat, he loves and dresses up as a super hero and ends up meeting William Shatner. It is definitely wonderful!
Marcus: It sounds it!
Lloyd:: And of course Citizen Toxie I am sure you know about that. That is also a 2-disc DVD and the second disc has a feature length documentary called "Apocalypse soon: The Making of Citizen Toxie" It is also a wonderful representation!
Marcus:: On the top of my list of MUST have DVD's...What advice can you give to people who want to break into the business?
Lloyd:: Well one thing is they should protest what is going
on with baby Powell! The son of the head of state is the head of the FCC!
Federal Communications of Commission, he is making it more and more difficult for
you consumers and film fans to get a 
variety of news and art. You should
protest! You should get rid of this fat fuck! He is a little porky little baby
duck! The FCC is supposed to protect the public against monopoly in media, and
instead the FCC is being used to create a monopoly of media so that Rupert Murdock
who owns the news company, which owns the New York Post, and 20th
Century Fox and everything else has the right to own TV stations, movie
theatres, he can control all the news Massachutes gets! Thats what you college
people should be fight against and voting against that! Unless you want to have
What A Girl Wants in every movie theatre! It goes against your right to art!
Forget Troma. Troma's bullshit! There are hundreds of major, major, movies out
there, artists, painters and medicine that you are being denied because of this
cartel attitude and it's not BUSH who did this! Clinton started this and Bush is
only continuing it. But Clinton is the one who did the worst damage. But the
point is there should be major demonstrations against this. But at any rate,
terms of being a filmmaker, I would say in let thy own self be true! Thats what
Shakespeare said...that goes for everybody. So if you believe in freedom, you
will fight the FCC and stop that baby Powell son of the Secretary of state
and the FCC. How do you think he
got his job? I ask you?
Marcus:: His father of course!
Lloyd:: Yeah! That would be my guess!
Marcus:: Thats how it always is...
Lloyd:: Well not always but you young people really have a opportunity to really fuck up the system! You should be out there and demonstrating, and fucking things up so that maybe these guys can't just take over everything. We are going to be getting one newspaper for the entire United States! There is going to be one TV network, as it is all your music, whether it is a rock and roll station, country western station, they are all owned by the same company and they play the same fuckin music! Every station basically plays the same music. Except for college stations and they are their last gasp and they are being bought up and put out of business! Alot of the college stations are being pre-empted by so called bullshit radio stations. Cause they turn out to be making a little money.
Marcus:: Thats what happened to my college radio station...:-\
Lloyd:: Yeah....I think the Yale College station...same thing is happening to it. They will broadcast the Yale football game cause that makes alot of money cause they don't have anything else on. Anyway enough of that....DEPRESSING stuff...
Marcus:: (chuckles) Ok, I just got one more question for ya. What is your take on these "new" horror, if you can call them new horror, films?
Lloyd:: What? The ones that copy Troma? Well it is sorta flattering that they are copying things we did back in 1983, it's ok ya know? Fine...but at some point these guys will go to hell. I mean ya know these guys aren't making anything good! It's garbage! There is nothing to them! There is no substance!
Marcus:: Yeah I hear ya, its like the film that was talked about in horror for over 3 years, House of 1000 Corpses and that really was nothing new.
Lloyd:: What a disappointment that was! And I don't think it was the fault of Rob Zombie, my guess is the studio chopped it all up.
Marcus:: Basically, according to Bill Moseley he said in several interviews that they cut alot out of it. A good 30 minutes was cut from it I take it.
Lloyd:: I am sure they fucked it up but maybe the DVD will have the real version. Yeah alot of good movies get it, Heaven's Gate, when they released that they chopped it all up and when you see the full version it's actually pretty decent. That Donnie Darko was pretty good horror film!
Marcus:: Yeah! ALOT of people really liked that, including myself.
Lloyd:: Yeah that was very good. There are a few good ones to
come out but they are few and far between. That was definitely original. Yep,
but meanwhile, they wont 
give George A. Romero a movie! They ought to let him
direct some movies. They keep kicking him off of things, how stupid is that? But
what are you going to do? Thats the world we live in! Anyone who has a slightly
original thought, get rid of him and throw in Michael Bay. Naw nothing about
Michael Bay, but the point is, George Romero could bring you something good in
the world of horror. Anything he does is good! Vampire! He did a great vampire
movie! But in any event...what are ya going to do. Unfortunately, this is the
result of letting the 5 or 6 mainstream conglomerates take control of everything
you get baby food. When they are spending $60 million dollars on the average
picture they can't take the chance....I mean take the Hulk...and I haven't seen
it and it might be very good cause Ang Lee is a great, great director even
though he is the son of Stan Lee. And maybe he got his job because he is the son
of Stan Lee. But I think The Hulk is worth while. You understand the stock of
Marvel went down because the Hulk didn't make $150 Million dollars over the
weekend. These budgets are so huge...and unless they make these films like baby
food so they can please all the people all the time....They can't come out with
breaking even! And that is not what art is about and it's not what movies are
about. And we aren't getting the good stuff...we are getting the crap like
"What a girl wants" What was the thing in the woods....that just came
out recently...some crappy shit horror film....
Marcus:: Wrong Turn?
Lloyd:: WRONG TURN! YEAH....piece of shit....absolute piece of shit!
Marcus:: Yeah, I didn't really care for it myself....
Lloyd:: Yes there is one that had a little promise then
they obviously made the guy cop out. Topsy Turvy I think....I can't remember it
was directed by the guy who did Cemetary Man...Soavi....anyway...it was really
great till the last 3rd....and the monster was very well done. But obviously
somebody in the studios made him cop out.
Marcus:: Yeah like Darkness Falls...did you get to see that one?
Lloyd:: Darkness Falls...which one was that one?
Marcus:: It was with the tooth Fairy and if you looked at her you died...
Lloyd:: No I didn't see that. Who directed it?
::Lloyd doesn't know how lucky he was that he didn't have to sit through that shit::
Marcus:: I forget who directed it, but it originally was supposed to be a really gory, 2 hour film, but it got cut down to PG-13, 75 minute shitfest!
Lloyd:: Yeah...well if you want to see a good one that isn't bloody, well actually it is a bit bloody but it was surprisingly interesting and beautifully shot. I just discovered it, a movie called Near Dark. It's a vampire movie but they never use the word "Vampire" And it's done by a female director, Kathryn Bigelow, it's really good and quite disturbing. And they kill a kid to...they have a vampire kid...one who tries to rape another vampire 9 year old girl...its terrific. Not that violent either...its really good.
Marcus:: Well I will have to check that one out to!
Lloyd:: You should...yea so...thats it.
Marcus:: Well I want to thank you very much for doing this interview, I have had a great time doing it.
Lloyd:: You are very welcome, and if you really want to thank me you can put a review for my book on Amazon.com, every review helps alot and it would mean alot to me if you could.
Marcus:: No Problem!
Thats the conclusion of the 2 part interview folks, I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did conducting it. I urge you all to get Lloyd's book, "Make Your Own Damn Movie!" it is just a great book even if you are not a Troma fan! For more info on Lloyd, Toxie or other Troma products....go to there website "Http://www.troma.com" Lloyd Kaufman everyone!