Changing after Life Support is normal.  You have been through a very traumatic experience.  I know that your personality changes so much.  You have lived through something and I know after months start going by, you remember many things.  I can remember my family talking to me.  I remember nurses telling me what they were going to do.  The staff had to restrain me so I would not pull out my intubation tubes.  I remember then telling me to stop pulling on the tubes.  I also remember, now, being restrained.  It is quite normal to have to do this to a patient as they are trying to pull out their tubes. I know they hurt.  My voice changed, too.  Having tubes in between your vocal cords for many days, weeks...my voice will never be the same.  I also changed in tastes.  I do not like the same clothing style I used to wear.  I do not like the same type of foods.  I can only say that all these changes have to be attributed to everything you go through-trauma.  Also, I believe while you are on Life Support, your oxygen levels causing hypoxia (lack of oxygen) may account for some of the changes you experience.  Either way, I am a new person.  I know that I still experience dreams from being on a ventilator.  Dreams that have changed my life forever.  I had a dream that my Father was standing very far away, without my Mom.  They were ALWAYS together.  I wondered  "Why is Dad there without Mom"   He would not come to me.  After getting off the vent, I called my Mom who had to go home.....my father was ill.  I talked to him to ask if EVERYTHING would be Ok.  He assured me it would.  I believed him and after that I was No longer afraid.  The day I left CCU, I called my Mother again and while we were on the phone, my father had a massive heart attack.  He passed away while I was talking to her.  I have thought about this many times and I DO NOT believe that this is a coincidence.  I believe that I already knew this.  THAT is a CHANGE.........

Most people that are family member, husband's, wive's, or friend's can support a survivor of Life Support many

ways:

1.  Always know that this person has been through a very traumatic ordeal.  They are very fragile.  Try and be

      understanding.  ALWAYS listen but also take time for yourself as they need your help.  Take shifts if possible.

2.  IF the person is re-living the Life Support issue, try and talk them into getting professionnal help.  You cannot

     be a therapist.  You are much too close to the situation to be neutral.

3.  Always talk with the Dr's and therapists, (Occupational, Physical therapists).  They are a very important link

      to your loved one's recovery process.  Voice your concerns and you opinions.

4.  Make the home environment as stress free as possible.  The person has already endured an extreme amount of

     stress.  They do NOT need to worry about needless things. i.e. bills, medicine doses. etc,

5.  If possible, keep a diary or journal.  Later the patient can reread things that they might not rememeber.  It is

     also helpful in your daily journey with them.  Read to them, tell them what you have written.  IF they are capable

     of dealing with the situation at hand.  If not, save it for later.

6.  Please remember that they may not act like the person that you knew.  This may pass with time or adjustments

     may have to be made.  I have changed dramatically.  I have also learned how to voice my hurt and anger about w

     what happened to me in a healthy way.  There is a lot of hurt involved.  Just try and LISTEN........