JULIA JOHNSON'S IDEAS & WRITINGS & WEBSITE

 

Dedication

 

 

     I want to dedicate this book to my mother, Kathleen Ann Urxxxs, Exxxn, Krxxxr, Rxxn. We were very different people and never came to a perfect understanding before she passed when I was 17. Now, that I am a woman, mother, wife and grandmother myself I understand she did the very best with the resources that she had. I will always love her because she was my mother. This book reminds me of the struggle she had in her life with all the wrong men. She was raising her children with her only support her best friend, her sister. I missed sharing my family with her but she found faith at the end of her life. I know she watches me from heaven, sometime…at least I hope! I SEE YA BEHIND THAT CLOUD MOM!

 

 

 

        Acknowledgement

 

      I want to share two different people in my life that inspire me. The first is my grandson Ryder. I do not know if we are born optimist or if we just grow into one. At his young age, he is so full of it all. He is two and the happiest person I have ever met. He enjoys swinging for hours, collects sticks to play the drums on any object and greets me, as each time was the first. He screams “Hey…Grrr!” that is what he calls me. (Which I will treasure the name always because he chose it for me.) He is so different from my personality, I tend to view that “the world sucks!” Our relationship is so refreshing to me. I LOVE YOU MY RYDER BOY!

 

 

      The other person I want to share with you is my Mary Ann. I call her MA for short. We are related, she is my Aunt and I her niece but we seem so much closer than that. I love her very much. We talk on the phone every day about anything and everything. (The thing about that is I live in the Midwest and she lives on the west coast.) She never gets tired of my writing and my books and I need that to keep going as a new author. I want to take this time to thank her for the hours of helping me edit and her endless ideas. Not that I used very many? So THANK YOU, MA!     

   

Chapter one~

“Hey, I’ve got a plan”

Pearl looked at him with a nervous smile, feeling her heart race in a combination of fear and excited anticipation. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she was trying not to give her self away…”Please keep calm,” she thought.

"Raymond, I don’t want anyone in the bar to see my black eye and know that we’ve had another fight.” Pearl said pointing to her face.

"Ok, here is some money.”  He said as he tossed two twenties at her. “Fill up the gas tank, and bring me back the change, and damn it, don’t be long.” Raymond finished yelling at her.

Pearl dropped him off at the corner about a half a block from his favorite bar. She could hear him cursing, for her “not to be late”, as she drove away. Taking a deep breath, she let out a small-excited giggle as she pulled into the nearest gas station. She filled the car with as much gas as she could and even spilled out a bit unto the ground. Pearl emptied the care of everything belonging to Raymond. This included all his clothes, boots, business papers, and trash. Seeing his things in the trashcan, it gave her some real satisfaction.” That will teach him to hit her,” she thought with a smile on her face. Pearl had wished she had done this along time ago. Was there time to wash the car? No, she had to complete her plans and there just was no time. Carefully looking around she parked the car, and entered the apartment, grabbing the ready-made suitcase she had packed earlier. Her mission was to hurry, find all the cash that she had been saving for months and get out of there.

Her friend Kitten, from down stairs had given her two hundred dollars this morning. Pearl was so appreciative to her because she knew just how hard this money was to come by and how Kitten made her money. Pearl felt a pang of pain knowing how much she will miss Kitten. She had always been such a good friend and ally in dealing with Raymond.

Pearl remembered all the times Raymond decided to treat her as a punching bag. If Kitten were home, she would loudly knock at the front door. When he finally opened the door, she would search the room to see if Pearl were dead or alive. When Kitten saw her, she would ask to borrow something. At times, she was so inventive it would make Pearl laugh. She always thought that Raymond had the “hots” for her because he would always stop what he was doing and flirt. Kitten would use this to her advantage, because without her interference Pearl knew she would be dead from his angry outbursts.

 Kitten would beg her when they were alone, to leave Raymond but she never would. Then last night he beat her until she blacked out. Pearl finally knew that she no longer had a choice and that her plan to leave was the right thing to do.

It reminded her of the statement “without bad luck you would have no luck at all” that is what Raymond’s life was like. Even though her life had been hard, she knew that staying with him would make it unbearable!

It was hard for her to look into Kittens eyes, as she said goodbye. The horrified expression she had when she saw my face was worth a thousand words. She started to cry and explain that she wanted to give her more money to help. Giving Pearl a hug, she whispered in her ear if you want to stay, I know a person that would “take care” of Raymond. Pearl’s response was to burst out laughing. She told Kitten that was very sweet of her and it was known that she loved her enough to get rid of Raymond but she could not let her do anything like that for her.

“Leaving is going to be a gift to myself so that I can get away and accomplish my “Roses Mission”, Pearl said with a wink and knew that Kitten understood.

Pearl stood there looking at Raymond’s payday money on top of the dresser. She quickly took it along with the twelve hundred dollars she had already stored in the bottom drawer with the change from the twenties he had just thrown at her she was going to do okay. That made two thousand and twenty dollars.

She laughed thinking of the rage Raymond would be in when he found out about her leaving with his money in her pocket. She hoped Kitten would be able to deal with all his questions, Pearl was glad that Kitten had powerful friends to protect her if he were to get violent.

Well, if she put most of the money into gas she could get pretty far; she thought. It only took her two trips to put all her stuff in the car; she had not realized she owned so little. It was not to long ago she owned her own business. How did she get so down and out?  Now, she was starting over again.  Pearl had a butterfly feeling in her stomach at the thought of the unknown future ahead.

Where was she headed? That question had haunted her since she first planed her escape. The only answer was “Just Away", especially from Raymond. If she had stayed with him, he would end up killing her. It seems like she would always find very good-looking men, but they ended up abusing her one way or another. She has to find a place where she can take care of herself, maybe she will keep men out of the picture for a while!

Pearl was feeling so free she rolled down her window, stuck out her hand waving and hollering. “So long Raymond, take care, Kitten.” Oh, it was wonderful to feel the cool breeze through her hand while it was outside the window. At that, very minute she started giggling, uncontrollably and decided this was a start to a new and happier life.

It was refreshing to listen to the radio and sing along not worrying how she sounded. People always commented to her about how good her voice sounded but as always she played it down because most of the time they were drunk.

That is the one thing Pearl was glad about no more creepy bars, she hated everything about what bars had to offer especial the ones she had been going to lately. Once they had gone to a karaoke bar and she had just started to have fun. She was about to go up and sing when Raymond said he did not want to drink with these losers, and that they were going to leave. Now she knew that she did not have to hang out with him anymore…this made her smile. Thinking back she remembered there was a very good-looking guy at that bar and Raymond caught them looking at each other. If the truth were known, she had felt the man staring at her. That was when both the man and Raymond saw her looking back. Yes, she had warned off that man before just to save the peace but she really would not mind if he were hitchhiking, she would pick him up in a second. This kind of thinking made Pearl happy, she was so afraid to think like this for the past couple of years…”I’m free!” she screamed as loud as she could stand it inside the car and then she had to giggle at the fun of just being silly.