jeremylipsin

Marriage customs have been almost the same for centuries. In Memoirs Of An Indian Woman, Shudha Ghose Mazumdar's autobiography, a passage is descricibg her marriage:

"One fine day in November of 1910 I was preparing for my annual [school] examination when I was told that I would not have to go to school any more for my marriage had been arranged."

     Shudha Gose was only 11 years old when she married Satish Chandra Mazumdar who was already twice her age. Imagine that! Their parents had arranged the marriage by studying the man's horoscopesso the marriage would be blessed. Shudha later said, "I did not want to get married. I only wanted to go to school. But My opinion did not count."

    Shudha's father was a wealthy, educated landowner. His daughter was sent to a convent school. Although, her mother followed strict traditional customs. Also, the bride and groom met for the first time at their wedding. At the final ceremony, the couple gathered before a statue of the god named Vishnu. As the priest lit a fire at the altar, the bride and groom poured rice and ghee onto the flame, and circled the fire seven times while holding hands. Satish Chandra recited the following verse: "In all  that I dedicate myself, offer thou thy heart. May thy mind in all consciousness follow mine. May thy speech be ever one with mine. May the lord of Creation keep thee Ever dedicated to me." Shudha replied, "I shall try my utmost." And she did try her utmost. She moved into the home of her parents-in-law. She eventually loved her husband, and had two sons with him. In time, their sons married resulting in their wives joining the family and their traditions.

    Within family and society, women had very few rights. Their duties included to marry, wait on her husband, and bear sons. In the Hindu traditin, only a son could perform the rituals for his dead father's soul. Even though the woman's role was inferior, she did not lack power. Hindus believed that women had shakti, meaning creative energy. Men weren't complete since they lacked shakti. Women were seen as dangerous unless ruled by a man, because they were thought to be lacking the knowledge to control their power.

    The Hindu law codes state: "[A woman] should do nothing independently even in her own house. In childhood subject to her father, in youth to her husband, and when her husband is dead to her sons, she should never enjoy independence."

Higher-caste women had to obey especially strict rules. they lived in a purdah, a complete seclusion. They wore veils over their faces and almost never left their home. They were kept seperately from all men except their husbands and close relatives. As the rules hardened, widows were forbidden to remarry. A widow was expected to give up all comforts and spend her life in prayer. She was considered unlucky, so other family members ignored her. Some widows even threw themselves onto their husbands' funeral fires other than enduring a life of hardship and cruelty. They then became sati, or virtuous women. Hindus believed, that in sacrificing her life, a widow wiped away the sins of her husbands and herself.