Jeff Buchanan - Finding Freedom from Homosexuality in the Church from Pure Passion on Vimeo.

Wie sollte die Kirche mit dem Thema Homosexualität umgehen?

Für die Kirche sollte die Bibel eigentlich die unfehlbare Autorität sein. Homosexualität ist dementsprechend Sünde - und nichts anderes sollte eine Kirche verbreiten. Allerdings gibt es durch Jesu Tod am Kreuz Hoffnung für alle Sünder. Gott liebt auch die Sünder und die Kirche sollte in Beispiel dieser Liebe sein. Homosexualität ist nicht besser und nicht schlechter als andere sexuelle Verfehlungen (inkl. Ehebruch, außerehelicher Sex usw.). Es reicht aber nicht, Homosexualität nur als Sünde abzustempeln - und damit die Menschen, die homosexuell leben. Die Kirche muss Menschen, die sich davon befreien wollen, auch unterstützen - mit all ihrer Liebe und über einen langen Zeitraum. Dafür ist es sehr hilfreich, wenn sie Mitarbeiter von Ex-Gay Ministries zu Schulungszwecken in die Gemeinde einlädt und über dieses Thema offen in der Gemeinde spricht. Allerdings ist auch Disziplin ein Ausdruck der göttlichen Liebe: wer sein homosexuelles Leben absolut nicht aufgeben will, muss auch mit entsprechenden disziplinarischen Maßnahmen zu rechnen haben.

Und wie ist es denn nun mit Sex und Gott?
Sonntagspredigt in der Gemeinde: Der Pa­stor spricht darüber, dass Sexualität von Gott geschaffen und zur Freude und Erfüllung der Ehe dienen soll. Doch wie kommt es dann zu der oftmals...
mehr...

Links:

"HOMOPHOBIA: A Scientific Non-Political Definition," presented by Dr. Sander J. Breiner

What is homophobia?
Hasn't the Bible be misinterpreted by homophobes?

Love Homosexuals as Jesus Would

How Christians Can Talk to Homosexuals

Educating the Public on the Causes of Homosexuality

HOMOPHOBIA

This is my first posting to the group “JASON”. I felt that I needed to write something as I am seeing a growing trend towards homophobia and violence in society today.

Today, people use the word gay in phrases such as "school is gay," or "that song is gay," now that bothers me  because the term “GAY” is now being loosely used to describe more than the homosexual male.

Many homophobic’s do not know anything about homosexuality, except that people who are “GAY” are attracted to the same sex. Some, say that they dislike homosexuals because their peers or society dislike them, even though these people concerned do not understand what it is to be homosexual.
Another concern to upright society is that homosexuals are not normal, that what they do is a perpetration against children. But why should homosexuals all be branded as pedophiles when the vast majority of homosexuals have nothing to do sexually with children. Prejudice and ignorance so often walk hand in hand with those who are for what ever reason full of their own self importance and righteousness.

 Does it really matter what a person’s  sexuality actually is? Does it interfere with your life? When people use the word  “GAY” to describe a person or a certain thing have you noticed that most times it is to describe something negative, something they dislike or something they perceive as being bad? And, so often, these self same people defend themselves by suggesting that I am not homophobic, I have friends who are homosexual and I don’t dislike them, as far as I am concerned they are good people.  But
there again, why would you describe someone or something you dislike as  “GAY” when you are friends with a homosexual? Or are you really friends when actually you are not at all.

Often times people do not people see pass ones sexuality. Some people automatically think if you are not attracted to the opposite sex, you are  a freak or abnormal or even worse, you have no right to breath the same air as “STRAIGHT” people.

Being attracted to the same sex is not something you choose to do. If it were I am certain there would be less homosexuals in society than there is at this present point in time.

The question that goes through my mind is this, why should homosexuals have to be subjected to additional pressures and experience additional difficulties in life just because of who they are? “GAY” and through no
fault of their own.

I would far prefer to have someone who is open and honest (and including their sexuality)  than someone who remains closeted for fear of being exposed as someone who is  according to society less worthy of respect, love and acceptance than someone who is “STRAIGHT” and whose attitude and behavior is less than acceptable and that which portrays nothing less than a negative and wasted lifestyle. The difficulty as I see it given today’s homophobic stance is this,  how ca we expect your homosexuals, “GAYS,” who
are in the closet to be themselves and produce the very best with their God given talents that may well benefit society in someway. The other point is this. How can we expect these self same people to be open, honest and peaceful within themselves given the fact that they are “GAY”?

The dictionary, describes the word “GAY” as meaning that a person is  happy or excited. This no longer reflects the persona of “GAY” people these days.
The pressure that homophobic society places on homosexuals/”GAYS” is totally unacceptable and biased in every conceiveable way. Such an attitude represents a terrible indictment on society at large and must be changed. both. Our children must understand that is  acceptable to be themselves without fear of prejudice or harm from other members in society. There is no way that our children or for that matter any member of society should feel threatened by or apprehensive with any segment in society at large.

 If you are wondering right now if I am gay, first ask yourself this , does it really matter? If it does matter, I think that the next question to ask is why does it matter. And this is where bias, lack of understanding about homosexuality and share prejudice creeps in. The following is a question I have asked many straight people, “why are you straight” and the answer always remains the same, “I don’t know, I just am.”? Ask someone who is  “GAY” why they are homosexual and the answer likewise remains the same, “I don’t know, I just am.”

Therefore, I think that the time has come for total acceptance of all people regardless of their race, color, sexuality, religion and so on, and reach out and accept one another as equals in the site of almighty God. After all said and done, it was Jesus Himself who said, ”I JUDGE NO ONE,” therefore,
why should we in society take on more authority than Jesus Himself had when He walked this earth?

Rev. Dr. Les Andrews DD

Ich bin in der Jugendarbeit tätig. Wie kann ich eine positive Umgebung gestalten, in der sich Kinder wohl fühlen und angemessen über sexuelle Fragen diskutieren können?

(Empfohlene Literatur: "An Ounce of Prevention" von Don Schmierer)
Einige Richtlinien: Verwende immer Gottes Wort als deinen Leitfaden. Veranstalte etwa einen Gruppenunterricht, in dem du die Ansichten der Bibel zum Thema Sexualität erklärst. Bringe den Kindern auch bei, ebenso die zu lieben, die (in ihren Augen) nicht liebenswert sind. Schließe immer alle mit ein und vermeide Situationen, in denen sich jemand ausgeschlossen oder herabgesetzt fühlt. Führe positive Vorbilder ein. Verstärke die wahre sexuelle Identität und bestätige die gesamte Person (also seine oder ihre Leistungen, Erscheinung und sexuell angemessenes Verhalten). Finde einen Weg, Missbrauch jeglicher Art anzusprechen. Achte auf hormonelle Probleme. Schaffe eine sichere Umgebung, in der Menschen frei und angemessen diskutieren können. Lobe jede positive Anstrengung in die gewollte Richtung. Ermutige Offenheit und erlaube emotionelle Ausbrüche - sei aber auch auf diese Offenheit vorbereitet. Schließlich: informiere dich laufend über diese Themen!

Studien belegen, dass Homosexuelle im Privat- und Berufsleben diskriminiert werden. Man muss deshalb öffentliche Beratungsstellen für Homosexuelle schaffen und die Gesellschaft (Schulen, Behörden usw.) über die Normalität von Homosexualität aufklären.

Hier werden zwei Dinge vermischt, die nicht zusammengehören. Natürlich gibt es Menschen, die Homosexuelle diskriminieren. Genause wie viele andere Menschen aufgrund ihres "Anders-Seins" diskriminiert werden. Nur - macht die Tatsache, dass sich Menschen falsch verhalten etwas richtiger? NEIN! Diese Menschen sündigen, indem sie andere als Menschen diskriminieren. Das macht aber die TATEN der Betroffenen keineswegs richtiger oder natürlicher. Ebensowenig bedarf es deswegen Beratungsstellen. Was es allerdings bedarf: wenn man den Menschen schon von Kindheit an christliche Werte vermitteln bzw. auch Erwachsene hierzu unterrichten würde, würde man diese Problematik nicht von hinten (bei den Symptomen: Diskriminierung) sondern von vorne (falsche Grundeinstellung) anpacken. Es ist grundsätzlich falsch, Menschen zu diskriminieren - nicht aber, deren Taten zu missbilligen!

Links:

Pastorale Begleitung von Menschen mit homosexuellen Neigungen - Interview mit Paul Harvey von Courage International

If AIDS is God's judgment against homosexuals, doesn't befriending them interfere with His will?

What can I do to make a gay person change?

If I have anything to do with a gay person socially, aren't I condoning his or her lifestyle?

I'm better suited to Christian political activism than to help someone gay. Shouldn't I focus on my strength?

For pastors and churches

What can I as a pastor do? Helping a person who experiences same-gender attraction  Article

How do I help my church respond to homosexuality?  Article

The local church: growth, grace and the Gospel   Article

Bridging the gap   Article

Connecting without Compromising:
the church and the gay/lesbian community   Article

Sexual minorities overlooked by missions   Article

Lord have mercy on us and make us merciful   Article

Pursuing freedom in the Body of Christ   Article

The journey ahead   Article

Homosexuality: is your church hiding or healing?   Article

Ed Dobson loves homosexuals   Article

Other resources for pastors

Link:

"Homosexuality & the Church"

Toleranz?

Es gibt zwei typische Reaktionen, wenn Gespräche auf das Thema Homosexualität kommen.

1. Schweigen. Gründe hierfür: man befürchtet, den Vorwurf der "Diskriminierung" zu ernten oder in ein radikales Lager abgeschoben zu werden. Man denkt, man hätte nicht genügend Hintergrundwissen, um den Argumenten von Homosexuellen oder fon schwulenfreundlichen Mitmenschen angemessen begegnen zu können. Das sit nicht nur Unsinn, sondern sogar gefährlich, da man hierbei der "Gay Propaganda" freie Bahn gewährt. Lesen Sie die betreffenden Stellen in der Bibel nach - und schämen Sie sich nicht, einen klaren Standpunkt für biblische Werte einzunehmen! Informieren Sie sich! Lesen Sie Fachliteratur, fragen Sie bei Ex-Gay Ministries nach! Laden Sie Ex-Gays zu Seminaren und Informationsveranstaltungen ein!
2. "Toleranz". Man will besonders "weltoffen" und "cool" gelten, oder gar "fortschrittlich" und gibt an, man hätte ja gar nichts dagegen, wenn Schwule heiraten, Beziehungen eingehen, Sex miteinander haben usw. Sollen sie doch - wenn sie sich "lieben". Was kümmert es uns? Nun, fragt man bei solchen Menschen etwas genauer nach und erklärt ganz offen, dass man zum Thema Homosexualität nicht so einen lockeren Standpunkt hat sondern das Ausleben oder bewusste Inkaufnehmen homosexueller Versuchungen/Neigungen ablehnt, merkt man sehr schnell, dass es mit dieser Toleranz nicht weit her ist, sondern dass solche Menschen im Grunde ihres Herzens Homosexualität genauso ablehnen und nur zugunsten von aktiven Homosexuellen argumentieren, um "politisch korrekt" zu sein. Niemand wünscht sich aber, dass sein eigenes Kind homosexuell wird. Und sehr schnell stellt man fest, dass auch diese Menschen Homosexualität als etwas Unnatürliches ablehnen. Dazu sollte man dann aber auch stehen - und nie vergessen, dass man nicht die Menschen mit gleichgeschlechtlichen Neigungen ablehnt, sondern das, was sie tun oder vertreten.

„Don Quixote, Cervantes‘ traurige Figur eines Ritters, traf in einem Dorf-Café eine junge Prostituierte. Die Menschen in diesem Dorf behandelten sie wie eine gewöhnliche Hure... Aber Don Quixote behandelte sie wie eine Lady und sagte ihr, dass sie tatsächlich eine edle Lady sei. Sie wurde Don Qixote‘s Dulcinea. Was er tat, war an die edle Frau zu appellieren, die tatsächlich im Inneren der Prostituierten versteckt war. Sie sah in seinen liebenden und Respekt-erfüllten Augen ein Abbild ihres wahren Selbst... Und so begann sie edel zu handeln; die Prostituierte wurde eine Lady, die Hure wurde eine Dulcinea.“ (J. Rinzema, The Sexual Revolution)

Don Baker erzählt von Jerry, einem Mann aus seiner Gemeinde, den er seelsorgerisch betreute und der Freiheit von der Homosexualität fand. Ihm wurde geholfen von Dan, den er im theologischen Seminar traf. „Als Jerry schließlich Dan gestand, dass er ein praktizierender Homosexueller war, füllten sich Dan‘s Augen mit Tränen, Jerry‘s Schmerz wurde auf einen ihn liebenden Bruder übertragen. Obwohl er nichts über Homosexualität wusste, war Dan doch bereit, genug zu lernen, um helfen zu können.“ Er war Tag und Nacht für Jerry zu erreichen und Jerry stellte diese Ergebenheit wiederholt auf die Probe. Er rief an, wenn er wieder zurück in die Sünde gefallen war – manchmal mitten in der Nacht – und er war immer willkommen. „Sie saßen oft schweigend zusammen und sahen einander an. Beide fingen dann an, zu weinen. Dan fragte: „Jerry, erkennst du an, dass das, was du getan hast, eine Sünde ist?“ „Ja“ antwortete Jerry dann... Dan fragte ihn dann, ob er Gott um Vergebung gebeten hat.... „Oh ja, immer wieder – so oft, dass ich mich schäme, immer wieder zu Ihm zurück zu kommen. Wie kann Er mir nur immer wieder vergeben?“ Wie kann Er mich immer noch lieben?...“ Geduldig und liebevoll sah Dan dann in der Schrift nach, mit der Absicht, Jerry‘s Glauben wieder aufzubauen und ihn daran zu erinnern, dass seine Errettung davon abhing, was Jesus am Kalvarienberg getan hatte ... Und nicht davon, was Jerry getan hatte. Dies wurde Dutzende Male wiederholt, wobei die Versuchung bei Jerry nicht weniger wurde – und ebenso wenig die Ungeduld von Dan.



Dan schlug vor, dass Jerry ihn anrief, bevor er Sex hatte statt hinterher. Jerry entschied schließlich, das zu versuchen. Er sagte Dan, dass er müde und einsam war und dass er es nicht bekämpfen wolle. Er versuchte verzweifelt, Dan dazu zu bewegen, aufzulegen und schrie ihn schließlich an, er solle endlich sagen, was er sagen wolle, weil er gehen müsse. Er wusste, dass Dan und seine Frau Gäste beherbergten und erwartete, dass Dan es bei ihm aufgeben würde. Aber das tat er nicht. Stattdessen begann er zu beten und Gott fing an, Jerry‘s Herz weich zu machen. Dan fragte: „Nun, Jerry, willst du nun nach Hause gehen?“ „Ich wünschte, das wäre so einfach,“ sagte Jerry leise. „Ich wünschte, ich könnte nach Hause gehen. Ich wünschte, ich könnte dir versichern, dass ich nach Hause gehen werde – aber das kann ich nicht.“ Einmal mehr fragte Dan sanft aber bestimmt: „Jerry, wirst du nach Hause und ins Bett gehen?“ Es gab eine langes Schweigen – gefolgt von einem tiefen Seufzer und einem leisen, aber bestimmten „Ja.“ Jerry ging nach Hause. (...) Zum ersten Mal hatte er die Macht dieser zwanghaften Versuchung gebrochen. Er hatte einen kleinen Schritt nach vorne gemacht. Er hatte Gott gehorcht und als er das tat, beruhigte Gott seinen wilden, unkontrollierbaren Drang nach Sex und er ging zu Bett und schlief – einen tiefen, friedlichen Schlaf.“ (Beyond Rejection)

---

Was sollte man nicht tun?

Ein Beispiel: Ex-Gays - also Homosexuelle, die sich davon befreien möchten - treffen sich in eurer Gemeinde zu Selbsthilfegruppen. Nun bekommt einer dieser Homosexuellen mit, wie über diese Gruppe (hinter deren Rücken) geredet wird:

Ein Bruder spricht einen anderen an und meint, es könne ja wohl nicht sein, dass die Gemeinde zum Treffpunkt von ehemaligen Homosexuellen wird.
Der andere antwortet, das sei nicht so schlimm. Sind ja nur ein paar.

Was ist daran falsch?

Eine ganze Menge. Zum einen sollte man nie hinter dem Rücken von jemanden reden. Menschen beklagen sich oft über andere - aber selten direkt bei denen, die es betrifft.

Dann: das ist genau das Pharisäertum, das Jesus in der Bibel beschreibt. Triff dich nicht mit Prostituierten. Mit Zöllnern. Oder Trinkern. Aber genau das hat Jesus getan - und den Pharisäern gesagt, dass genau diese Menschen ihn am nötigsten haben!

Vielleicht ist genau das der Grund, warum viele Gemeinden nicht wachsen. Gott fügt Gemeinden neue Glieder hinzu - wenn sie nach Seinem Willen handeln. Vielleicht sollten wir mal wirklich nachdenken, warum so viele Menschen ihren Gemeinden den Rücken kehren oder erst gar nicht dahin gehen. Jesus hat uns gesagt, andere Menschen würden uns an unserem Verhalten untereinander und an unseren Früchten als Christen erkennen. Wenn das unsere Früchte sind...

Auch die Antwort des anderen Bruders spricht für sich: was wäre denn, wenn sich mehr in dieser Gemeinde treffen würden? wenn es 500 wären? Wäre das dann so schlimm, weil die Gemeinde zum Treffpunkt für Ex-Schwule "verkommt"? NEIN!!! Genau das Gegenteil! Das wäre wunderbar! 500 Menschen, die zum Herrn wollen!

Eine Gemeinde darf nie zum religiösen Club verkommen, wo sich Menschen mit Anzug und Krawatte treffen, um sich gegenseitig zu zeigen, was für tolle Christen sie sind.

Eine Gemeinde sollte ein Ort der Liebe sein. Liebe unter den Geschwistern - aber auch Liebe für "die da draussen".

Denn darum geht's doch hier:

LIEBE.

Robert Gollwitzer

The Gospel of Disgrace

I Still LoveHomosexuals
(Part 1)

I Still LoveHomosexuals
(Part 2)

Sexual Ethics in Ministry

Faith Groups Take Stands on Homosexuality
Christian leaders are rejecting the gay agenda.

• Jesus Himself said, “If you love me, you will obey what I command” (John 14:15)…the same Jesus that affirmed God’s design for marriage (one man, one woman, for life) and condemned both divorce and adultery (Matthew 5 & 19).
  
• The apostle John wrote, “If we claim to have fellowship with Him yet walk in darkness, we lie and do not live by the Truth…No one who continues to sin has either seen Him or known Him…He who does what is sinful is of the devil…No one who is born of God will continue to sin…”

Has God Spoken on the Subject of Homosexuality?

How Should the Church Respond?

Women Should Wear Hats

How to Love Homosexuals

(Part 1)

(This article is adapted and expanded from a workshop I taught at Saddleback Church's recent HIV/AIDS conference)

by Tim Wilkins

There is a form of love that is merely verbalized and nothing more. The words are as meaningless as the nauseating "no problem" often heard in the hospitality industry.

We cannot reach the homosexual until we first love the homosexual. One of W. E. Sangster's seven rules for personal evangelism was "Do not set out to make people good-love them."

No one has ever been argued out of homosexuality or into the Kingdom of God

I receive email from around the world-- much of it from men and women who not only suffer greatly from unwanted same-sex attractions, but from uncaring churches.

One such email came from a 19 year old man who lives in Singapore. Here's his email in his rough English.

r churches really against homosexuals

I am a gay n I left my church bcuz of many reasons, all the reasons r related 2 homosexuals.

reasons:

1st my paster went on stage n started insulting n joking abt homosexuals. every1 was laughing. I didnt think it was funny but I followed them and laugh cuz I don't 1 em 2 think I m a gay.

            2nd, my church brothers called me "a girl".

3rd, my sherperd, the person who taught me a lot of things on christianity when I joined the church call me "aqua" meaning gay. I was really hurt by that word. quite lot of people calls me that but I didnt expect my own sherperd 2 say such a thing 2 me. that's when I decided that I was borned without a soul n I was sent in2 this world 2 suffer. god never ever wanted me as his child.

Now I know that christianity is nver meant 4 me.

now the question that has been bothering me ever since I left is whether churches r really against homosexuals.

Thank u.


We live in denial if we dismiss this young man's pain-filled email with a glib "he misunderstands us Christians", or "he's too sensitive."

Loving Homosexuals Requires That You Have Experienced God's Love

It is impossible to express a love that you have not experienced. God says "I have loved you with an everlasting love." (Jer 31:3) And John the Apostle wrote "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! " (I Jn 3:1)

God wants his love to be reciprocated, but he will not force us to love him. If you would love homosexuals best, you must love God most!

Dr. R. Albert Mohler, President of Southern Seminary writes "Evangelical Christians must ask ourselves some very hard questions, but the hardest may be this: Why is it that we have been so ineffective in reaching persons trapped in this particular pattern of sin?"

The atheist Voltaire may have had the answer. He wrote "If Christians want us to believe in a Redeemer, let them act redeemed." Ouch!!

Rick Warren says it like this, "There are two basic reasons people don't know Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. They have never met a Christian. They have met a Christian." Ouch again!!

Loving Homosexuals Requires Getting Right with God

You can be a Christian and still not be right with God.

A lady walked into a psychiatrist's office. She was wearing a strip of bacon over each ear and a poached egg on top of her head. As soon as she sat down, she struck a serious pose and said to the doctor, "I've come to talk to you about my brother-who has a problem."

Jesus said before you can remove the microscopic speck from your brother's eye, you need to eradicate the lumberyard from your own eye. (Loose translation of Matt 7)

A mother, father and their teenage son came to see me; the parents had learned their son had same-sex attractions by viewing the history on his computer-gay porn. One of the recommendations I made was to perform a DSL-ectomy on the home computer. Immediately the father became agitated saying "that's impossible, my work depends on it." I was not surprised to get a call from the son later that week. "I couldn't tell you the other day, but the reason dad became agitated at your suggestion to disconnect from the Internet is because I secretly know he has some sites he visits also."

Loving Homosexuals Requires Distinctive Qualities

Humility tops the list. A day after I hosted a TV show, I got a call from a pastor. "I saw you on TV last night. Do you find homosexuals in churches where you speak?" I replied, "I believe there are people with homosexual attractions in all churches." The pastor's proud and self-assured retort was, "Not in mine!"

Has it come to this? Do evangelicals pride themselves on the mistaken belief that their church has no one with homosexual attractions? Wake up and smell the latte!

Charles Spurgeon visited an affluent, aristocratic woman one day. He moved the conversation to sin and one's need of Christ. The woman said "Rev. Spurgeon-- I'll have you know I have not sinned in the last three weeks!" Spurgeon said "My, you must be awful proud of that" to which she answered "Indeed I am!"

Care is important. I had counseled Brandon for some time--every session a trying experience. He was haughty, arrogant, high-minded, caustic, and more abrasive than 40 grit sandpaper. On the morning of an appointment he left me a voice message "I don't think I need to see you anymore; this is not helping."

My first thought was "thank goodness that's over with!" But I realized my response was wrong and unbiblical. So I called him and left this message. "Brandon, I got your call and appreciate your honesty. I want you to know that if you ever need someone to scream at or curse, call me. You can say what you feel and I will listen."

A few minutes later Brandon called. He spoke haltingly, "Tim, this is Brandon. I got your message and was wondering if I could still make my appointment today?"

"Sure!"

Brandon walked in my office and sat down. I began, "Your initial message was that you did not want to continue, that this was not helping. What did I say in my message that changed your mind?"

Brandon's arrogance was gone. Unlike previous appointments, his demeanor was broken--his words sobering. "Tim, it's not so much what you said; it's because you care."

Warren Wiersbe writes "Lost sinners came to Jesus, not because He catered to them or compromised His message, but because He cared for them."

Empathy is "Direct identification with, understanding of, and vicarious experience of another person's situation, feelings, and motives." We often call it "walking in another man's shoes."

Kindness Mark Twain wrote, "Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see." (See Colossians 3:12)

Patience, gentleness and respect. "But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect..." (1 Pet 3:15) The episcopalian preacher Phillips Brooks wrote an "...element of a preacher's power is genuine respect for the people whom he preaches to."

Loving Homosexuals Requires Being Pro-Active

Many friends of homosexuals tell me "all I know to do is pray for her." I believe in prayer, but prayer is never an excuse for inaction! Love is a verb!

Have evangelicals forgotten that when Adam and Eve ate us out of house and home, God initiated a search and rescue mission-calling out to Adam, "Where are you?"

Are we inoculated against the miracle of the Incarnation- forgetting that God left the splendor of heaven for the stench of a cow stall-to become a man and dwell among us?

And have we underestimated the fact that nowhere in Scripture is God ever pictured in a hurry-except in Jesus' parable of the prodigal son? The father, who represents our Heavenly Father, races to the wayward son. (Luke 15)

Loving Homosexuals Requires Believing in Freedom from Homosexuality

A 'love' that rejects the reality of freedom should be considered "cruel and unusual punishment." A grace that forgives us of sin, but does not free us from sin is a grace not worth having. Individuals who hold to "once a homosexual, always a homosexual" should take Christ's words to heart--"You know neither the scripture nor the power of God." (Matt 22:29)

(Look for Part 2 tomorrow)



Cross Ministry
PO Box 1122
Wake Forest, NC 27588
919/569-0375

www.CrossMinistry.org

Equipping the Church to Evangelize and Disciple the Homosexual

How to Love Homosexuals

(Part 2)

(This article is adapted and expanded from a workshop I taught at Saddleback Church's recent HIV/AIDS conference)

by Tim Wilkins

Loving Homosexuals Requires Asking Their Forgiveness

I know what you're thinking "the writer of this article is crazy; why should I ask forgiveness from my gay family member? He's the one living in sin!"

Bear with me here.

Larry Burtoft writes "If the biblical and theological perspectives are right which see in homosexual behavior one of the myriad forms which human fallenness can take, then those engaged in such behavior deserve...the offer of divine forgiveness and healing which is available." I would add that evangelicals need to ask homosexuals' forgiveness for some inappropriate responses we have made to this issue. Note I said "responses" not "beliefs."

This recommendation is often met with incredulity. Take a spiritual inventory. When you first learned that a friend or family member was homosexual, did you curse them? Did you scream at them? Did you use any language unbecoming a Christian? Did you condemn them? Did you entertain the thought "I'm glad I'm not like him." Did you gloat? Did you feel yourself to be holier than him?

If you did any of the above things, you have sinned against God and homosexuals and need forgiveness. First, go to God and ask His forgiveness. "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." (1 Jn 1:9)

Then go to the homosexual and ask her forgiveness. No emails or letters; this needs to be face-to-face or if distance is an issue, make a phone call. Here's an example of what to say. "When I learned of your same-sex attractions, I said some angry things I should not have. While I still hold to my beliefs on the issue, I ask your forgiveness for the mean-spirited remarks I made. Would you please forgive me?"

At this point you wait for them to say "I forgive you." If they will not forgive you or take the conversation in another direction, remain polite and respectful. Remember, you are not asking forgiveness in order to gain a confession of sin from them. Your request for forgiveness needs to be personal, brief and sincere.

You are not responsible for how they treat you; you are responsible for how you treat them!

In preparation for a speaking engagement at a major university, I encouraged the inviting organization to run an ad in the student newspaper. I wrote the following ad which they ran.

Apology to Gays Overdue (that headline caught attention)

While we have clearly communicated our beliefs about homosexuality, we confess we have not always done so with humility. Our conspicuous, self-righteous attitudes have contradicted the very message we proclaim. We have regularly emphasized truth to the neglect of love. Often our desire to be right has overshadowed our responsibility to be respectful.

We confess that we are sinners in need of God's grace, that the way we live our lives has not always matched what we confess with our lips. We confess that although all of us are created in God's image, that image has been marred by our own deliberate sin against our Creator and we long to be remade in His image through the atoning death of Jesus Christ.

Thus we apologize for the way in which we have addressed this issue. We ask your forgiveness and commit ourselves to build bridges of friendship based on human dignity rather than human sexuality.

(The date and time of my speaking followed.)

Loving Homosexuals Requires More Than Words

1 John 3:18 reads "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." (Emphasis added)

When a friend or family member of a homosexual contacts me, an initial question is "what do I tell him so he will leave this lifestyle?" As if there is a magic set of words that will do the trick.

In 1979 Adrian Rogers was elected as President of the Southern Baptist Convention. He could have run for re-election in 1980, but chose not to. When asked by a reporter why he was not running for a second term, Rogers said God told him not to. The reporter then asked "Did God speak to you in an audible voice?" Adrian Rogers revealed one of God's attributes when he answered "No, It was louder than that!"

If God can speak in inaudible ways, can his children not also? Chuck Colson and his wife have the following matted and framed in their home "Christians should share the gospel at all times and if necessary, use words."

Loving Homosexuals Requires Touch

Physical touch is not optional, it is essential! Americans, particularly men, are reticent to express affection to each other. Not so in other countries, nor in the Bible. In China, Africa and other countries it is common to see men embrace and hold hands. When I was in East Africa a few years ago, I noticed two teenage boys with their arms thrown over each others' shoulders. Ron Taffel, in his book Why Parents Disagree, recounts a father's question, "Is it all right if I hug and kiss my two-and-a-half-year-old son goodnight? I'm afraid it will turn him into a homosexual."

Such thinking is counterintuitive!

Some in the church defend their resistance to ex-gay ministry on the grounds that homosexuality is a dirty subject-to which I politely say-- "I am not aware of a 'clean sin.'." God the Father got His hands dirty when He "...formed man from the dust of the ground." (Gen. 2:7) God the Son got His hands dirty when He washed the dust/dirt/sewage from the disciple's feet. (John 13:5)

Communicate love physically, not just verbally! Biblical examples of demonstrative male friendship include David and Jonathan, Paul and Timothy and Jesus and John the Beloved Apostle (John 21:20)

Loving Homosexuals Requires Telling the Truth

Take another inventory. When you read the previous point-"Loving Homosexuals Requires Telling the Truth", which truth did you first think of?

--that homosexuality is sin, an abomination or similar thought OR

--that when a person asks forgiveness, God separates them from their sin as far as the 'east is from the west' or 'and such were some of         you?' or similar thought

My point is this-- I find that when the word truth is used in relation to homosexuality, many Christians first think of "sin" or "abomination" versus God's transforming grace. We must give people the whole counsel of God. What people need is "the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth."

Let me illustrate this with an actual email I received from a Christian man who mistakenly thought I was still a homosexual.

"I will continue to pray for your misunderstanding and immoral offenses. I have faith that God will open a door for you so you can realize your sins. Here is a verse written by Paul in Corinthians. 'Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God.'

If Jesus was ok with homosexuality, then why was Paul and everyone else to follow the Christian movement until the late 20th century so against it? The Bible talks about such catamites as this in the end times. Please find the truth."

Much love, Tom (not his real name)

I do not advocate Tom's form of evangelism for the same reason I do not advocate sticking one's lips in a meat grinder.

Tom made some major mistakes. First, he assumed I was homosexual. Second, the tone of his email is less than loving; on the contrary it reeks with arrogance. And thirdly, Tom does not give me the whole truth when he quotes 1 Corinthians. He quotes verses nine and ten, but omits verse eleven which is crucial to the text. Versus eleven reads "And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus." (Emphasis added)

Also note that telling the truth does not mean converting homosexuals to heterosexuality. Many Christians peddle heterosexuality like it's 'another gospel.' (See Galatians 1:6) Conversion is to Jesus Christ who, in turn, transforms us. Jesus did not say "Go and make heterosexuals." He said "Go and make disciples."

Loving Homosexuals Requires Listening

James 1:19 reads "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry."

We can learn a lesson from Job. His oxen and donkeys are stolen. His servants and sheep are killed. His camels are carried off. A storm collapses a house-killing his sons and daughters. And his health deteriorates dramatically. When Job's three friends hear of his multiple calamities, they go to comfort him. Because of Job's poor health, he is unrecognizable to the friends who weep in sympathy.

Here's the important part. "Then (the friends) sat down on the ground with (Job) for seven days and seven nights with no one speaking a word to him, for they saw that his pain was very great." (Job 2:13) (Emphasis added.) Can you imagine sitting with a hurting homosexual and remaining silent for a week? Some Christians can not be silent seven seconds when the issue of homosexuality is broached.

After addressing a church group, a visibly-angry lesbian made her way toward me. My understandable fear subsided when I got the story. The lesbian's sister would not allow the lesbian's partner to visit her nephew and niece.

Though tempted to interrupt her tirade and say the sister had the right and responsibility to guard her childrens' exposure to such relationships, I sensed I should remain silent and just listen compassionately.

Then, with no hint that things were about to change, tears began to stream down her face. In a soft-spoken voice I asked "Why are you crying?" Though she didn't answer my question directly, and what's more I already knew, her reply spoke volumes, "I cry all the time." I pulled up two chairs; we sat down and for more than an hour I listened to her story of hurt and confusion.

Do not miss the point! If I had not kept my mouth shut, this lady and I would never have connected.

Peter Marshall said, "There are aspects of the gospel that are puzzling and difficult to understand. But our problems are not centered around the things we don't understand, but rather in the things we do understand. This, after all, is but an illustration of the fact that our problem is not so much that we don't know what we should do. We know perfectly well, but we don't want to do it."

Is it possible that what many Christians do not want to do is love?

Jesus said "...all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." (John 13:35)

If you beleive in what Cross Ministry is doing, please consider mailing a tax-deductible gift today.

Cross Ministry
PO Box 1122
Wake Forest, NC 27588
919/569-0375

www.CrossMinistry.org

Equipping the Church to Evangelize and Disciple the Homosexual

“That’s my King!”

By Tim Wilkins

Tucked away in Philippians chapter four is a verse replete with truth for gays and all other sinners. Yes, we’re all in the same boat; the ground is level at the foot of the cross AND the deck of the boat.

At the most personal level, the Apostle Paul knew God’s provision through shipwreck, snakebite, stoning and his notorious thorn in the flesh. He was warming a prison cell when he wrote “And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” (verse 19) (full story)

Evangelicals More Proactive in Outreach to Homosexuals, Notes Ministry Head

God Loves Gays
The Conservative Church’s Response to Homosexuality

Healing
June 26, 2009
With a growing awareness of Spirit within, I claim health and well-being.
Read this message >>

Healing
June 26, 2009
With a growing awareness of Spirit within, I claim health and well-being.
Read this message >>

Healing
June 26, 2009
With a growing awareness of Spirit within, I claim health and well-being.
Read this message >>

www.recoverygap.com

The Recovery Gap is a blog dedicated to better understanding sexual addiction.

• Pastor Help

Links:



Full Text - New US Bishops Conference Document on Homosexuality

(Let Us Sit At Their Well, Practical steps to reach someone who is sexually broken,Families Matter, Tips for Sharing the Gospel, Transsexualism in the Church: A pastor responds, I am going to pour out my Spirit on all flesh)

What can I as a pastor do? Helping a person who experiences same-gender attraction  Article

How do I help my church respond to homosexuality?  Article

The local church: growth, grace and the Gospel   Article

Bridging the gap   Article

Connecting without Compromising:
the church and the gay/lesbian community   Article

Sexual minorities overlooked by missions   Article

Lord have mercy on us and make us merciful   Article

Pursuing freedom in the Body of Christ   Article

The journey ahead   Article

Homosexuality: is your church hiding or healing?   Article

Ed Dobson loves homosexuals   Article

Other resources for pastors

• The Bible and Homosexual Behavior
• The Church and Homosexuality
• Responding to Gay Social Issues

• If Your Friend Says, "I'm Gay"
  by Tim Wilkins
  
  
• Surviving Sexual Storms with a Family Pact for Purity
  by Michael Ross
  
  
• To Touch the Leper: Ministering to HIV Patients
  by Eric L. Raddatz
  
  
• Q&A: How Do I Respond When a Friend Comes Out?
  with Dr. Henry Cloud

Viewpoints

• The 'Gay Spin Zone'
  by Stephen Bennett
  
  
• The Homosexual Agenda: Intolerance on the March
  by Alan E.Sears and Craig Austen
  
  
• A Challenge of Courage & Compassion: The Church's Response to Homosexuality
  by R. Albert Mohler Jr.
  

Research and Fact Sheets

• Fact Sheet on Homosexuality
  
  
• Sexual Purity Fact Sheet (Homosexuality) – 2002
  The Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission, public policy arm of the Southern Baptist Convention

I dedicate this last thought tonight to my very dear and treasurered brothers in HA.

May the Lord's blessing always remain with you.

In His service.

Les.

I Am



I am a worthwhile person.

I am entitled to be who I am.

If you can't accept me as I am,

Then you are not worthy

To be a part of my life

To ignore or reject who I am

Is your loss.

I deserve uncompromised devotion.

Anything less is unacceptable.

If you can't view me

As the treasure, the prize

That I am,

Then forget it--

I am worth more than that.

There will be others

Who will recognize

The worthiness of who I am.

I am who I am

And I am a worthwhile person.


Likewise, please consider the song as written velow, MIRACLES DO HAPPEN....
and praise God for that.

~L~

"Miracles happen because one happened to me. I can't explain it but  I no it
was especially for me. Miracles happen and now one's     happening today,
thank You Jesus for first loving me." ( Song )

Link:

Stellungnahme der Adventisten zum Thema Homosexualität

From Exodus Youth:

answering hate

Is there really a disagreement about hate crimes in America today? Are people actually debating over teen suicide? The truth is that everyone agrees both of these things are horrible and we should work to eradicate them. But not everyone shares this goal. There are those who doctor numbers and distort reality, capitalizing on tragedy to further an altogether unrelated agenda.

For years we have heard that suicide is the number one cause of death among gay-identified youth.
Researchers reported that as many as a third of all gay-identifying teens attempted suicide. But now, even openly gay researchers are debunking these findings. Rich Savin-Williams found that a lot of the studies magnified the problem because they didn’t distinguish thought from action. In other words, teens who had had suicidal thoughts were counted among those who had actually attempted suicide. Still, this inaccurate information is used to justify the “need” for homosexual organizations to dictate what public schools teach adolescents and children about sexuality. It is also used dishonestly to vilify those who believe in change.

When a disturbed teenager viciously attacked gay bar patrons in Massachusetts, some gay activists faulted James Dobson. But when police searched the murderer’s home, did they find a copy of ‘Bringing Up Boys’, or an Exodus brochure? No. They found
materials from white supremacist groups.

What people should know is that those who really do hate gays hate Exodus too! They hate us because we work as hard as anyone to put an end to bigotry. We are teaching the church to love homosexuals. We don’t condone homosexual behavior, but we encourage the Body of Christ to get out of their comfort zone and love the person behind the issue and to walk alongside those who are on the long, hard road to freedom. That’s what people walk away with from events like Love Won Out and Groundswell.

Our critics attempt to pin hate crimes and suicide to us because there’s no honest way to discount the truth that there is freedom from homosexuality in Christ! Scientific and social research have only shown that same-sex attraction isn’t genetic and
doesn’t have to dictate the course of one’s life—and when it’s allowed to, the effect is often detrimental.

Those who are truly concerned about victims of abuse and despair will seek out the real causes and engage in honest activism. But some choose to spin these issues to defame those who stand against their efforts to disintegrate the meaning of family and
indoctrinate younger and younger schoolchildren with sexual confusion. If they really cared, they would discern the vast difference between a hate crime and a lifestyle of purity. If they were truly tolerant, they wouldn’t need to direct false accusations at
everyone who disagrees with them.

As representatives of Christ, it is our duty to stand up for those who are hated and judged. This does not involve condoning sin, as Jesus demonstrated by saying to the woman caught in adultery, “Neither do I condemn you. Go now and leave your life of sin.” (John 8:11). But first, He chased away those who accused her in their self-righteousness. We can change lives with the
grace Jesus exemplified.

We don’t do this by redefining marriage, we do it by being a friend to the lonely and sticking up for the bullied. We don’t do
this by supporting legislation that is contrived to silence the truth, but by speaking the truth even when lies are more popular. We don’t do this by offering false hope in sexual permissiveness; we do it by sharing the Good News of Jesus Christ and facilitating the healing that is not only possible, but promised.

June 15, 2004: Although the leading Christian churches in the United States continue to view homosexual behavior as outside the realm of appropriate Christian conduct, revisionist scholars within their ... more...

Legal Brief: Amicus Brief: Pastor Ake Greens
October 19, 2005: FRC joined Alliance Defense Fund, Focus on the Family and two other Christian groups to file an amicus brief in a Swedish case in defense of a Pentecostal minister who preached a sermon ... more...

Ressources (links):

---

Christ's Love For Homosexuals I - II by John Paulk & Mike Haley

---

• Hear about "Christ's Love for Homosexuals" on a broadcast tape available in our online Resource Center.
• How should the church love homosexuals? A booklet available in our Resource Center is a must-read for any Christian who desires to emulate God's heart for the homosexual.

---

Links:

What should be the attitude of Christians toward those who are gay?

Dr. Michael L. Brown: the Gay Community Knows We Have Strong Convictions but Christians Need to Apologize for Our Angry Behavior
Dr. Michael L. Brown / Aimee Herd reporting (May 6, 2006)

Homosexuality - A Christian Perspective

An effort to speak the truth in love on a volatile subject

• A "Christ-Like" Approach To This Issue
• Determining The Truth About Homosexuality
• What The Bible Teaches About Homosexuality
• What Causes Homosexuality?
• Is It Possible To Overcome Homosexuality?
• Helping Homosexuals To Overcome
• Concluding Remarks

Quick Church Links

• Exodus Church Network
• Church Resources (articles, etc)
  • How to Minister
    
  • Understanding Homosexuality
  • Homosexuality and the Church
  • Answering "Pro-Gay" Theology
• Youth Leader Manual

Homosexuality and the Church Topics

• The conservative church's response - Article
• Homosexuality, Science and the plain sense of scripture
• What Christians think about    Book Review
• Claiming The Promise - Book review
• Congregations Talking about Homosexuality - Book Review
• Homosexuality, the use of scientific. . . Book Review
• Pastor I am Gay     Book Review
• Take back the Word   Book Review

Links:

Being salt and light, rich in good works
Hating evil, loving good, and pursuing justice
Preaching repentance
Overcoming evil with good
Speaking the truth in love
Quotes from Christian Leaders

Auf eines sollten wir im Umgang mit Homosexuellen besonders achten: sie nicht zu Suendenboecken fuer unsere eigenen Unzulaenglichkeiten werden zu lassen (das gilt im uebrigen auch fuer die "Gegenseite"). Wie schnell sind wir dabei, andere Menschen oder das Verhalten anderer Menschen radikal und entschieden zu verurteilen und sie zum großen Feindbild zu erklaeren. Nicht selten stecken dahinter eigene Unzulaenglichkeiten, ein gebrochenes Verhaeltnis zu Gott, ein verzerrtes Gottesbild, eine besondere Vorstellung davon, was ein Christ zu tun, wie er/sie auszusehen oder sich zu verhalten hat usw.

Ja, wir duerfen und sollen zu unseren Ueberzeugungen stehen - dies aber in Demut und Liebe. Einer Liebe, die nichts fordert und nichts verlangt.

Children need acceptance and love from parents and from others. Whenever that love is not demonstrated, the child, who sees adults as perfect, believes that it is because of some fault in him or her. When a child feels rejected, he or she in turn rejects the adult in order to protect himself or herself from being emotionally hurt. This is called defensive detachment. It is not always the parent’s intention to hurt their child’s feelings. The problem may be the child’s perception of rejection. But most often dysfunctional parents produce dysfunctions in the lives of their children.

Further, other environmental factors such as sexual abuse or peer rejection can lead to defensive detachment that results in unmet emotional needs for love, security, and identity. These needs do not disappear as a child grows older. When puberty comes with its strong sexual feelings, they are sexualized and one day the youngster says, “I must be gay!”

Individuals can only change their desires by finding others of the same sex who will love and accept them where they are and who will, by building good healthy relationships with them, help restore them to a healthy heterosexuality.

The first step, of course, is to lead them into a vital relationship with Jesus Christ. “But,” someone may ask, “how can the church help those who have found Christ but who still struggle? We teach that Christians aren’t yet perfect. How do we help these men and women with their struggles?”

The church can train men and women to be mentors (which is just a popular word for disciple-makers). Mentors come alongside the struggler to befriend them and guide them into healthy relationships.

There are six qualifications for a good mentor:

(1) A good mentor should demonstrate a healthy self-confidence and possess a good moral character.

(2) A good mentor should possess a strong sense of their own masculinity or femininity and see themselves clearly as a man or as a woman.

(3) A good mentor should have a strong-ego strength. Their feelings should not be easily hurt and their boundaries should be in place. They should relate well to the opposite sex.

(4) A good mentor must be emotionally stable. They must be comfortable with their own feelings and be able to share those feelings with those they mentor.

(5) The mentor must be able to be physically affectionate so that they can supply what the person they are mentoring did not receive from their same sex parent. They must not be dependent on the person they are mentoring for their own emotional support.

(6) The mentor must pursue the relationship since defensive detachment makes it very difficult for the one they are mentoring to reach out. This is what a good parent should do when a child is hurt and pulls away and the mentor must now act in place of the parent.

The concept of same-sex mentoring is thoroughly scriptural. The Bible calls on older men to help younger men, while older women are to mentor younger women (see Titus 2:1-8).

If you were in deep, emotional trouble, wouldn’t you want someone to come beside you and gently show you the way out? And doesn’t the golden rule say, “Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets” (Matthew 7:12).

How can the church help those who struggle with same-sex attractions? By doing what the Bible has told it to do all along. As Dr. Elizabeth Moberly, a Christian research psychologist whose research in this area is most important, has written, “A defensive detachment from the same-sex love source, and consequent unmet needs for love, constitute the homosexual condition. Love is the basic problem, the great need, and the only solution. If we are willing to seek and mediate the healing and redeeming love of Christ, than healing for the homosexual will become a great and glorious reality.” [Homosexuality: A New Christian Ethic, (Cambridge: James Clarke & Company, 1983), p. 52]

--Elton M., Springfield, IL

From Homosexuals Anonymous: http://www.ha-fs.org/April_2007/p2007_articleid/64

CANADA: Ex Gays Write Open Letter to Members of [Anglican] General Synod  2007

Catholic News Agency: What the Church teaches about Homosexual Inclinations

1. We have not been authentic, and have not had much to offer you to help you find freedom in Christ. We have exemplified an anemic variety of Christianity - holding to a form of godliness but denying the power thereof.
2. We have been dishonest, fearful of exposure to our own sins. We have allowed people to see a sanitized version of our lives.
3. We avoided engagement with messy people who are coming out of patterns which will take a lifetime to heal.
4. We have, in some cases, been the perpetrators of the abuse which became the root of your sexual patterns.

1. In many cases we have been more interested in being right than loving, and have ended up being neither.
2. We've settled for a weak Christianity. We have had little to offer those who need to find God's power to break free from sin.
3. (In our misunderstanding of sin,) we've fed the very dynamics of shame which have been keeping people captive.
4. We've largely failed to seek out the homosexual community with the Gospel, despite the fact that the Father is always seeking them in love.
5. We have failed to provide a place for those coming out of homosexuality; either in our churches or in our hearts. You've needed a healed, whole, loving family to return to in the Lord.

Please forgive us and please come home to the church. You're part of us, it's your birthright, and we need you.


Originally published in the Exodus Update, September 1995.

 

Quick Church Links

• Exodus Church Network
• Church Resources (articles, etc)
  • How to Minister
    
  • Understanding Homosexuality
  • Homosexuality and the Church
  • Answering "Pro-Gay" Theology
• Youth Leader Manual

Search the Bible:

HELP

"We talk a lot about loving sinners and wanting to win the world, but we expect them to wipe their feet before they come into church. We get angry before they smoke in the church bathroom. We don't understand when they say, "Right on" instead of "Amen". And wait till you hear the silence in the crowded fellowship hall when one of them uses a dirty word. The church must learn that she is not a Hotel for Saints but a Hospital for sinners." ("The Chronological Life of Christ", Mark E. Moore)

"Many of us, like the Pharisees, at best ignore the outcasts of our society and at worst continue to discriminate against them. We do well to consider substantially inreasing our spiritual, evangelistic, and social outreach to minorities, the homeless, prostitutes, addicts and pushers, gays and lesbians, AIDS victims, and the like, as well as to the more hidden outcasts such as divorcees, single parents, the elderly, white-collar alcoholics, and so on... We dare not join with sinners in their sinning, but we may well have to go places with them and encounter the world's wickedness in ways that the contemporary Pharisees in our churches will decry" (Blomberg)

Haben nicht alle Männer früher oder später homosexuelle Neigungen? Sollte deshalb die Kirche dem Thema nicht aufgeschlossener gegenüber stehen?

Solche Fragen hört man tatsächlich manchmal von Christen und sie sind auch ernst zu nehmen. "Neigungen" ist ein dehnbarer Begriffe. Männer werden gerade in jungen Jahren sehr leicht sexuell erregt - manchmal genügt hierfür bereits ein Blick auf die eigenen Geschlechtsorgane. Einmal vom Anblick eines anderen Mannes sexuell erregt worden zu sein, bedeutet also noch lange nicht, man hätte homosexuelle "Neigungen" (oft werden hier noch durch nichts belegte Statistiken aufgeführt). Und selbst wenn dem so wäre: als Christ sind wir Gottes Geboten verpflichtet. Wir wissen, dass uns Gott liebt. Wenn Er uns also Gebote erlässt, dann nicht, um uns herum zu kommandieren, sondern eben weil Er uns liebt und vor den Konsequenzen unserer Handlungen bewahren will.

Die Bibel darf man doch nicht wörtlich nehmen! Sie wurde zwar von Gott inspiriert, aber von Menschen geschrieben. Und Paulus hatte keine Ahnung von homosexuellen Neigungen, so wie wir sie heute kennen!

Hier begibt man sich auf gefährliches Glatteis. Zu sagen, die Bibel sei zwar inspiriert, aber gleichzeitig auch von Menschen - mit all ihren Fehlern - geschrieben, würde dem Missbrauch und der Willkür Tür und Tor öffnen. Wann auch immer uns etwas an der Bibel nicht passt, muss man es dann eben im Licht der damaligen Zeit oder mit dem Hintergrund des Schreibers sehen, der damals noch nicht das Hintergrundwissen hatte, das wir heute haben. Was gibt uns das Recht, so von der Bibel zu reden? Und wer bestimmt dann, was gilt und was zu verwerfen oder "umzuinterpretieren" ist? Dann kann man aus jedem A ein B machen - je nach Beleiben und "neuen wissenschaftlichen Erkenntnissen". Gott ist der Schöpfer des Universums. Zu behaupten, die von Gott inspirierte Bibel und deren Schreiber hätten keine Ahnung von der Homosexualität gehabt, so wie wir sie heute können, würde nicht nur bedeuten, Gott hätte keine Ahnung gehabt, was Er da eigentlich schuf, es würde uns mehr noch über Gott stellen. Abgesehen davon dürfte auch der Mensch Paulus, der hier oft angesprochen wird und der sehr weit herumgereist ist und unzählige Menschen getroffen haben dürfte, sehr wohl eine Ahnung von Homosexualität gehabt haben. Und es ist ja auch nicht so, dass sich Homosexualität im Laufe der Jahrtausende groß verändert hat - von äußerlichen Praktiken vielleicht einmal abgesehen. Gerade die, die hier immer mit der Genetik argumentieren, würden sich damit ja ein Eigentor schießen! Selbst wenn man aber dieses Argument gelten lässt, muss doch auch gesehen werden, dass Homosexualität in mehreren Büchern des Alten und Neuen Testaments, in mehreren Kulturen und über eine sehr, sehr lange Zeit verurteilt wurde. Und KEIN EINZIGES MAL wurde sie befürwortet!! Das sollte uns doch zu denken geben...

Noch ist doch gar nicht geklärt, was Homosexualität verursacht. Es könnte doch auch genetisch bedingt sein! Kann denn etwas Sünde sein, dass in unseren Genen ist?

Es ist erstaunlich, wie sich selbst Christen hier so leicht in die Irre führen lassen. Bleiben wir doch um der Diskussion willen bei dem Argument. Wo hört das dann auf? Was, wenn morgen genetische Mitursachen für Pädophilie, Alkoholismus, bestimmte Formen kriminellen Verhaltens entdeckt werden (hier soll keineswegs Homosexualität mit diesen Begriffen in eine Reihe gestellt werden, aber dieses Argument führt unweigerlich zu derartigen Konsequenzen!)? Ist dann all dies nicht mehr Sünde? Müssen wir dann die Bibel umschreiben? Nirgends in der Bibel finden wir einen Hinweis darauf, dass wir dieses oder jenes nicht tun dürfen, ausser wir hätten es in den Genen. Wenn ich genetisch bedingte Diabetes habe, darf ich auch nicht jedes Stück Torte essen, das auf dem Tisch steht - ich muss vielmehr lernen, damit zu leben (auch hier gilt: hiermit soll nicht Homosexualität mit Krankheiten gleichgesetzt werden. Es geht hier vielmehr um die irrige Annahme, dass etwas, was in irgendeiner Form Mitursachen in unserem Gencode hat, gleichzeitig deshalb moralisch akzeptabel sein muss). Es steht uns nicht zu, nach Gutdünken und mit unserer begrenzten menschlichen "Weisheit" Wahrheiten der Bibel umzuschreiben und am christlichen Menschenbild zu rütteln. An dieser Stelle soll auch noch auf etwas anderes hingewiesen werden: Was, wenn man mit dieser Überzeugung falsch liegt? Die Bibel warnt uns ausdrücklich davor, andere Menschen in die Irre zu führen und zur Sünde zu verleiten... Ausserdem vergisst man dabei auch oft die Tradtition und Lehrmeinung seiner eigenen Kirche - und dies in manchen Fällen über Jahrhunderte. Schließlich sind wir nicht Sklaven unseres Gencodes. Zu behaupten, es wäre genetisch bedingt und damit zu unterstellen, diese Menschen können ja gra nicht anders, zeugt von einem Menschenbild, das uns zu willenlosen Sklaven unserer Gene macht.

Wenn die Kirche das Ausleben von Homosexualität verbietet, werden solche Menschen doch nie sexuelle Erfüllung finden!

Also ist es besser, "sexuelle Erfüllung" in einem Kontext zu finden, der klar den biblischen Vorgaben widerspricht? Was für eine Theologie wäre denn das? Nein, wir ziehen den Hut vor all denen, die gleichgeschlechtliche Neigungen empfinden, aber für sich entschieden haben, dass sie Jesus mehr lieben als alles andere. Die ihr Kreuz auf sich nehmen und Jesus nachfolgen - auch wenn es nicht leicht wird. Aus eigenen Erfahrungen können wir Ihnen sagen: es lässt sich durchaus auch ein erfülltes Leben als Mensch mit gleichgeschlechtlichen Neigungen finden, ohne dabei Sex mit demselben Geschlecht haben zu müssen! Eine sexuelle "Erfüllung", die nicht den biblischen Vorgaben der monogamen und heterosexuellen, lebenslangen Ehe entspricht, ist keine "Erfüllung", sondern ein Bruch von Gottes Geboten und kann nie wahre Erfüllung bedeuten!

Eine Bekehrung von Homosexualität ist doch gar nicht möglich!

Die Frage ist, was man hiermit eigentlich sagen will. Der wissenschaftliche Hintergrund dieser Aussage sei mal dahingestellt (wir verweisen auf die este Langzeitstudie zu diesem Thema, die besonders auch auf den religiösen Hintergrund eingeht). Es geht aber hier nicht um "Bekehrung" im Sinne von "Umpolung". Es geht darum, ein Leben nach christlichen und biblisch begründeten Grundsätzen zu leben, und das schließt ein Ausleben von Homosexualität unserer Auffassung nach eindeutig aus. Es lässt sich aber durchaus ein Leben führen, ohne dies tun zu müssen. Ein Leben, das erfüllt und reichhaltig ist.

Es ist doch besser, Homosexuelle führen eine verantwortungsvolle Partnerschaft als dass sie sich in der Szene herum treiben und mit mehreren Männern (bzw. Frauen) Sex haben! Zumindest ist es das kleinere Übel!

Also sollen wir den biblischen Grundsatz der monogamen, heterosexuellen und lebenslangen Ehe mal so einfach über Bord werfen? Als Christ mit dem "kleineren Übel" zu argumentieren, ist schon fast armselig. Es geht ja auch nicht nur darum, Menschen etwas zu "verbieten", sondern ihnen die positive Alternative hierzu zu zeigen: ein Leben in der Nachfolge Jesu Christi! Derartige "Argumente" zeugen von einem Menschenbild, das die Betroffenen zu ärmlichen, willensschwachen, triebgesteurten und hilflosen Individuen macht! Vielmehr sollte man Homosexuellen mit Liebe und Verständnis begegnen - vor allem, wenn sie sich entschlossen haben, ihre Neigungen nicht auszuleben, sondern ein Leben mit und für Jesus zu führen! Wir ziehen den Hut vor all denen, die dies auf sich nehmen und dafür neben ihren eigenen Versuchungen oft auf Spott, Angriffe und Unverständnis stoßen.

Es kommt doch nur darauf an, wie sich die Menschen lieben! Wenn sich zwei Männer mit einer selbstlosen Liebe lieben, ist das doch genauso in Ordnung wie wenn das ein Mann und eine Frau tun! Es ist doch nicht das Geschlecht, sondern nur die Liebesbeziehung wichtig!

Das würde bedeuten, wir würden unsere persönliche Liebe über die Liebe zu Christus stellen - und davor hat Er uns ausdrücklich gewarnt! Auch Spencer Tracey und Katherine Hepburn haben sich unsterblich geliebt, aber Spencer Tracey war verheiratet - und das nicht mit Katherine. Ehebruch bleibt Ehebruch, egal wie man das Kind nennt. Liebe macht nicht alles automatisch richtig und moralisch akzeptabel. Natürlich gibt es Homosexuelle, die sich sehr lieben und das soll hier gar nicht lächerlich gemacht werden. Aber als Christen vertrauen wir eben doch mehr dem, was uns unser Vater im Himmel gesagt hat - und eine Liebe, die nicht Seinen Vorgaben entspricht, ist für uns einfach nicht akzeptabel. Mal ganz abgesehen davon fragt man sich, warum im Durchschnitt homosexuelle Beziehungen so viel kurzlebiger als heterosexuelle sind, wenn die Liebe doch dieselbe ist. Und betrachtet man die vielen Faktoren, die zur Homosexualität beitragen, spielen da sehr oft noch ganz andere Sachen eine Rolle, die mit Liebe wie wir sie als Christen kennen, nicht zu tun haben (und das ist absolut wertneutral gemeint). Das soll Homosexuelle nun keineswegs schlecht machen oder ihre Gefühle verletzen, aber als Christen können wir einfach nicht allem nachgeben, auch wenn wir uns noch so sehr danach sehnen mögen...

Eine gute Frage. Theoretisch ja, denn jemand, der ein Ausleben seiner gleichgeschlechtlichen Neigungen sowie die schwule Szene an sich nicht befürwortet, keine "tiefgehenden" Neigungen hat sowie vielleicht sogar jahrelang zuvor ein keusches Leben geführt hat und möglicherweise noch zusätzlich seelsorgerisch betreut wurde - so ein Mensch könnte eigentlich jederzeit auch Ordensmitglied werden.

Eigentlich.

Zum einen darf man durchaus nachfragen, ob die Messlatte bei rein heterosexuell empfindenden Menschen genauso hoch gehängt wird. Zum anderen sieht die Realität meist anders aus.

Hier wird manchmal angeführt, dass rein heterosexuell empfindende Männer etwa die Gründung einer Familie aufgeben, was gleichgeschlechtlich empfindende Männer ja nicht tun würden.

Hört sich erstmal vernünftig an. ABER: wie kommt man eigentlich auf die Idee, dass letztere nichts aufgeben? Auch sie sind zum Zölibat gerufen! Auch sie geben ihr ganzes Leben Jesus und Seiner Kirche hin! Und nachdem wir im Himmel ja nicht mehr wie hier auf Erden Partnerschaften eingehen und heiraten werden und die Kirche - und somit Orden und die mystische Vereinigung mit Christus - ein Speigelbild, eine unvollkommene und bereits jetzt angebrochene Vorwegnahme des himmlischen Königreiches sind, lässt sich hier auch nicht in menschlichen Kategorien wie sexuelle Anziehung argumentieren.

Durchaus verständlich sind die Ängste mancher Ordensoberen, die ja auch Verantwortung zu tragen haben für das Verhältnis der Brüder bzw. Schwestern untereinander und das Bild, das der Orden nach aussen gibt. Und hier sind eben Befürchtungen da, dass es zu sexuellen Verfehlungen zwischen den Brüdern (oder eben Schwestern) kommen könnte, wenn Menschen mit gleichgeschlechtlichen Neigungen darunter sind.

Auch hier darf man nachfragen, ob bei heterosexuell empfindenden Bewerbern ebenso genau nachgefragt wird (sie kommen durchaus auch mit Menschen des anderen Geschlechtes in Kontakt!). Ebenso darf daran erinnert werden - wenn man denn von einem nicht zu kontrollierenden Sexualtrieb ausgeht - dass auch in reinen Männergesellschaften etwa (siehe Gefangene usw.) durchaus Fälle von homosexuellen Akten an der Tagesordnung sind (mangels Alternativen). Aber dieser Punkt sei hier ausgeklammert.

Nochmal: ich verstehe durchaus die Befürchtungen der Ordensoberen. Zum einen aber sollte man hier ein offenes Wort mit den Betroffenen führen und nicht den Orden vor ihnen verschließen. Die Konsequenz hierbei ist leider, dass Menschen mit gleichgeschlechtlichen Neigungen, wenn sie sich denn zum Ordensleben gerufen sehen - diese Neigungen den Ordensoberen verschweigen. Ich weiß durchaus, wovon ich hier rede.

Der wichtigste Punkt aber: auch wenn es nicht bewusst beabsichtigt hat, führt das Ausschließen solcher Menschen zwangsweise dazu, dass aus gleichgeschlechtlichen Neigungen eine eigenständige Identität wird.

Gehen wir hierauf etwas näher ein: ein Mann mit gleichgeschlechtlichen Neigungen entschließt sich dazu, diese nicht auszuleben. Er führt jahrelang ein zölibatäres Leben, engagiert sich in der Kirche, arbeitet fleissig, bildet sich spirituell weiter usw. Parallel dazu sieht er sich zum Ordensleben gerufen und beginnt, Kontakt zu Orden aufzunehmen. Er verbringt viel Zeit mit den Brüdern, lebt, arbeitet und betet mit ihnen. Die Brüder mögen ihn und er mag sie - sie sind schon fast zu seiner Familie geworden. Der Provinzial sowie andere Brüder fragen ihn sogar mehrmals, ob er nicht eintreten möchte.

Er entschließt sich, offen und ehrlich zu sein und erzählt dem Provinzial sowie dem Verantwortlichen für die Berufungspastoral von seinen Neigungen sowie von seinen aufrichtigen Bemühungen, ein gottgefälliges Leben zu führen. Er gibt ihnen Referenzen über katholische Seelsorger, die ihn dabei begleitet haben und bietet hierzu ein offenes Gespräch an. Obwohl es ihm sehr schwer fällt, schreibt er einen langen und sehr persönlichen Brief über sein bisheriges Leben. Er breitet sein Herz vor den Brüdern aus. Ganz offen schreibt er da dem Provinzial, dass er es durchaus verstehen könne, wenn der Orden nichts mehr mit ihm zu tun haben will. Der Provinzial solle so entscheiden, wie es das beste für den Orden ist - nicht für den Betroffenen. Er würde sich dem Urteil beugen, auch wenn es ihm weh tut, möchte aber gerne jetzt wissen, ob man denn eine Möglichkeit sehe, dass er eintreten darf - bevor er selbst den letzten Schritt hierzu tut.

Die Reaktion: nichts. Er fragt mehrmals nach - und wieder nichts. Die Brüder, die ihm gegenüber zuvor so herzlich waren, ignorieren ihn plötzlich völlig.

Er ist ihnen keineswegs böse - auch heute noch ist er zutiefst dankbar für die Zeit, die er dort verbringen durfte und an seiner positiven Einstellung dem Orden gegenüber hat sich nichts geändert. Aber es tut ihm sehr, sehr weh, so behandelt zu werden. Er hat einen jahrelangen schweren Weg hinter sich und hart an sich gearbeitet - vielleicht weitaus härter als viele seiner rein heterosexuell empfindenden Mitbewerber. Aber trotz allem sieht man offenbar keine Möglichkeit, ihn in die Ordensfamilie aufzunehmen.

Und genau hier macht man aus gleichgeschlechtlichen Neigungen eine eigene Identität. Gott hat alle Menschen heterosexuell geschaffen - für Christen gibt es also nur heterosexualität - selbst wenn manche Heterosexuelle homosexuell empfinden (und sei es aus genetischen Gründen!). Und selbst wenn diese Neigungen nicht verschwinden.

Geht man aber davon aus, dass der Betroffene hilf- und willenlos seinen Neigungen ausgeliefert ist und eine ständige Gefahr für den Orden darstellt, gibt das zum einen eine traurige Vorstellung vom christlichen Glaubenszeugnis ab und zum anderen lehnt man ihn für das ab, was er ist (in etwa vergleichbar mit der Ablehnung von Frauen aufgrund der Tatsache, dass sie Frau sind. Und genau hier hat man eine Identität aus etwas gemacht, was aus christlicher Sicht keine eigene Identität ist). Er kann tun, sagen und denken, was er will - er wird doch immer der Schwule bleiben, der gleich einer ansteckenden Krankheit eine potentielle Gefahr für den Orden darstellt (auch wenn man es ihm selbstverständlich so niemals sagen würde und auch wenn andere Gründe mit dazu beitragen - der Hauptgrund dürfte wohl in seiner "Veranlagung" liegen). Im Gegensatz zu der befreienden Botschaft der Bibel durch Jesu Tod am Kreuz bleibt der Betroffene gebrandmarkt und kommt sich wie ein Mensch zweiter Klasse vor.

Tieftraurig nimmt er Kontakt zu einem anderen Orden der gleichen Familie auf. Dort ist er von Anfang an völlig offen, da er dies nicht nochmal erleben möchte. Gleich im ersten Gespräch erklärt man ihm - wenn auch sehr freundlich und herlich - dass man hier sehr vorsichtig ist und lässt erkennen, dass es wohl nicht dazu kommt, dass er in die Ordensfamilie aufgenommen wird. Man müsse aber zunächst noch die Zentrale in New York anrufen.

Der Betroffene ist noch trauriger als je zuvor. Die Brüder bedeuten ihm immer noch sehr viel - er tägt ihnen nichts nach und ist nicht böse auf sie. Er wirbt weiter für die Gemeinschaften und betet für sie - aber er fragt sich, ob es das ist, was der Ordensgründer wollte.

Noch mehr aber, ob es das ist, was Jesus wollte.

by Tim Wilkins

Some time ago, I wrote an article Is Our Silence a Sin of Omission? which was prompted by a derogatory term, used by a denominational leader, in referring to persons with same-sex attractions. I asked you to email your comments about the article – which many of you did. The article appears below in an abbreviated form - followed by some of your comments (both pro and con) and a dilemma I am facing since the article first appeared and for which I ask your suggestions. See "It gets worse."

Is Our Silence a Sin of Omission?
By Tim Wilkins

A denominational leader recently referred to persons with same-sex attractions as "sodomites." Such language is as reprehensible as Ann Coulter's language a few months ago when she spoke of presidential hopeful John Edwards.

Beloved preacher John Stott writes, "However strongly we may disapprove of homosexual practices, we have no liberty to dehumanize those who engage in them." Unfortunately such language is more prevalent in some Christian circles than realized.

One can expect misguided individuals (and there are many) to make denigrating remarks about such persons, but is it a sin of omission for genuine followers of Jesus Christ to remain silent when such remarks are made?

I, a former homosexual, believe so.

Do you remember what "sin of omission" means? A Sunday school teacher asked her class of six-year-olds what sins of omission were and a little boy replied "Those are sins we should have committed, but didn't."

Wrong answer. James 4:17 says "Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do, and does not do it, to him it is sin."

Edmund Burke said "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." This quote is often used to encourage Christians in fighting societal ills, (gambling, abortion, homosexuality, pornography, etc.) but isn't this quote also pertinent in encouraging believers to politely speak their mind when another believer makes offensive comments?

I want all persons with same-sex attractions, whether embracing or rejecting such attractions, to know I do not condone these remarks. Moreover, I am asking you if you condone them.

Most likely you do not, but are you willing to respectfully say so? Many of you have children, friends, co-workers who are dealing with homosexuality?
If you believe "sodomite" and such speech to be inappropriate, I’m asking you to email me your thoughtful and respectful remarks which I will include in a forthcoming newsletter. (End of article)

The denominational leader has since gone further, writing - “…there is nothing ‘gay’ about a bunch of sodomites who are dying young and trying to take as many with them as they can. Secondly, these light-in-the-loafer folks always don't like anything I do because I am a God-lover, not a God-hater like most of them. They are afraid someone like me will remind them of God's attitude toward sodomites. Look at His redevelopment plan for Sodom and Gomorrah.”
____________________________________________

Here are some responses that disagreed with my article.

“I see nothing wrong in calling a sodomite a sodomite, a queer a queer. The queers, Satan's spawn have infested our schools, our work places, our entertainment, etc. I do not hate the person but I definitely HATE THE SIN and THE QUEER AGENDA. Our sin of Omission here in the good old PC USA is that not enough of us have the courage to WAKE UP AND SPEAK OUT. We must do all we can to keep sodomites away from our children. I am unsubscribing from you and your tolerance of queers.”
___________________________________________

“You are not a ‘former homosexual.’ You are a homosexual who is married and is taking advantage of vulnerable gay men by making them feel guilty about themselves - and you are making money off of it to boot. You are as despicable -- if not even more so -- than the closeted hypocrites like _____________ or ______________ who, by the way, are married and have children. How you manage to look at yourself in the mirror, or at your wife and children, everyday is even more offensive.”

(Note from Cross: Cross Ministry does not make money; we operate on a deficit.)
__________________________________________

“I'm unsubscribing from your newsletter. I understand that you are a former homosexual, so you have great compassion and understanding for their need. However, I don't agree with you saying it's wrong in a sermon to call homosexuality sodomy. It is what it is. Perhaps the preaching of God's Word will bring conviction and repentance. You want to water down the TRUTH of God's Word??? I just don't understand your thinking on this. I will not read or support your ministry anymore.”

(Note from Cross Ministry: We checked our records; the writer has never supported Cross Ministry)

_________________________________________

Others agreed with the article.

“I concur - the term ‘sodomite’ shouldn't be used by Christians, especially leaders in the pulpit. The use of ‘sodomite’ by many Christians identifies those who don't want to get their hands dirty and deal with homosexuality at all. They fail to realize the scores of silent individuals who deal with this issue privately, but dare not confess because of our lack of love.”
________________________________________

“I am an ordained minister and have been so for 13 years. I'm also an ex-gay who has been completely encounter-free for over 21 years- Praise the Lord. The things we ministers say in the pulpit, as well as things said by believers in the Lord Jesus in general, have a bearing on whether sinners in general will come to repentance and faith in Christ. I'm also reminded of Romans 2:4 which tells us "...that God's kindness leads [us] toward repentance." For those who possess the Spirit of God, we are some of the most unkind and rude people toward sinners.”
________________________________________

“As an ex-gay, I've had to endure the preaching of well-meaning but ignorant ministers who called homosexuality the most heinous of sins. Having to endure such preaching made me withdraw and keep it to myself. I went for years before I could ever openly talk about my past and present struggles. It's hard to believe, but many men and women dealing with this issue are often the most depressed. I was one of them, even as a believer. Such depression is reinforced by the lack of understanding and the abundance of ignorance, impatience, coldness, and apathy displayed in words and actions by believers. I know this firsthand.”
________________________________________

“If we Christians would allow God’s Spirit to permeate our hearts, we would be able to minister effectively to all sinners, including homosexuals, just like Paul did. Imagine being able to say just like Apostle Paul ‘And that is what some of you were.’ (1 Cor. 6:11)”
________________________________________

“I have a child who is homosexual. I'm pretty sure God wants me to start a family support group here, and I appreciate the heads-up that we will probably have to support it from our own funds. Being pro-traditional marriage and opposed to candidates who support sin should not make people anti-ministry, unless they are members of a church club rather than the body of Christ.”
________________________________________

“It is unfortunate to hear someone use the term. Not only is it offensive to those with the homosexual attractions, it is offensive to me and to others. In my mind, it reveals a deep misunderstanding of the love of God. It also reveals a degree of arrogance and superiority.”
_________________________________________

“The power to impact and draw people does not lie in our critical and pious attitude; it lies in our ability to reach out and express the love of God that has been extended to us. Who of us got right with our Creator because someone was harsh and insensitive towards us?”
_________________________________________

“I believe you are a warrior. Thank you for your stand. We do more condemning than we do loving in this area. We work in Los Angeles and it is a center for the gay community. No one ever responds to Christ when dehumanized, but love always wins. I am so happy Jesus loves me in the ugliness of my sin; how can I condemn another? Let love rule!”
_________________________________________

“I’m writing in response to your article. A few weeks ago a friend of mine and my husbands was at a house we were working on. Another friend, who is homosexual and does not know the Lord, was also there. The first friend I mentioned, "Tom" had some comments to make about my homosexual friend after he left and we were alone. Although at first the comments were not inappropriate, I could tell they could go that way and could become mean-spirited. It was a situation where I knew I should speak up. So before I let it get that far I said there are far worse things that could be going on in someone’s heart that can’t be seen. My friend’s homosexuality is out there for everyone to notice and comment on, yet seemingly church-going people walk around everyday with bitterness, unforgiveness, and hatred hidden where no one can see or comment upon. I believe "Tom" got my point, that I was not going to allow my homosexual friend to be put down in that way. I want to minister to my homosexual friend’s heart.”
____________________________________________

My purpose of this writing is one of encouragement. Just as you do, I believe that love for your fellow man is absolutely necessary - it is a modus operandi, a way to go about things. It is that which our Lord Jesus Christ showed us, by dying on the cross: His undying love for us. This modus operandi is one we have to acquire, receive, pursue and pass on. This then, is the way we talk and the way we act. And I believe that you and your ministry are doing exactly that.

Whenever somebody talks about other people in words that are just sneers about some conduct (another modus operandi), it is like fighting fire with fire. Instead, we should fight fire with love.”
___________________________________________

“In regards to the remarks people make about homosexuality and those practicing it; I have a son who is homosexual.

I don’t appreciate the remarks people make about him. When they speak about homosexuality they are including him without knowing how much pain it causes me to hear what they call him and how much pain it causes him to know others say these things. That is one of the reasons homosexuals buck up and defend their rights so adamantly.

God loves my son as much as He loves all the preachers in the world, and all the followers of Christ. He died for us and for my son. To make debasing words about homosexuals makes it harder to try and show them God’s love. I know ‘with God all things are possible’, but please people, with all the love that God has to give, try harder to show that love and not your own hatred toward any who are living in sin.”
_____________________________________________

“Just to let you know that I, too, disagree with the derogatory terms that Christians (especially pastors) have used. I have struggled with homosexuality most of my life even though I accepted Christ when I was 22. I am thankful for men of God like you who stand up for us who struggle.”
____________________________________________

“Thank you for this response and I will tell you that I wholeheartedly believe that the church daily practices sins of omission when we stand by and allow people to be degraded because of the sin in which they are entrapped. So often people assume the role of the Pharisees and dehumanize those caught in sin to a point of recognizing them solely by their sin. By ignoring the image of God written on the heart of every sinner, we who so often throw stones commit the one sin that we are told God hates-- pride.”
____________________________________________

“I read your article concerning the term ‘sodomite’. I, too, find it extremely offensive. I think of Jesus ministering to the woman at the well who had ‘known’ several men. Jesus did not refer to her as a harlot or a whore, but spoke to her with respect and compassion as a person of value, ministering to her need. He never once devalued her as a human. My father, who does not yet know that his oldest grandson (my son) is gay (he will soon because I am telling him), used this term the other day. While offended, I said nothing. It will not happen again, I can promise you that. Thank you for bringing it to my attention. No wonder so many view Christians as hypocrites and insensitive. I am afraid we often look more like the Pharisees than Jesus. God help us! God help me!”
____________________________________________

“Your article touched my heart. My daughter is 22 years old and actively homosexual. About two years ago, two former homosexual men, one former homosexual woman, and my husband and I attempted to start a ministry in Longview, Texas for those struggling with same-sex attractions, their friends and families. We probably didn't have enough experience, but we did have the heart. We sent letters to every church in our area (256 churches) explaining our ministry and the hope for recovery through a relationship with Jesus Christ. We received not a single reply to our letter.

I talked extensively with our pastor about the need for this ministry and at first he seemed receptive. He agreed to let us have a Sunday service to present a skit I had written and to allow one of the former homosexual men to give his testimony. The pastor later told me the congregation was not ready to receive this particular message! I was shocked.

Also, even my personal friends who know I have a lesbian daughter and are in a music ministry with me, continue to make fun of and degrading remarks about homosexuals. I did call them on it a few weeks ago and asked them how we were supposed to reach these people with the gospel and show love to them like Christ has commanded if they continue to make disparaging remarks. They had no answer and, in fact, largely ignored it. It continues to be frustrating when those experiencing same sex attractions and those actively engaged in homosexuality need to see the love of Christ through us. They are not seeing it, so why should they come to Christ? I am mailing a check for $250 to support your ministry. God bless you!”
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It Gets Worse!

(Tim Wilkins picks up here.) Some time ago I was asked to write a feature article for a pro-family organization to which I devoted much time and prayer. I wrote compassionately so as to lovingly persuade those from a differing view to see my belief on homosexuality. Thus I avoided all demeaning words.

I was stunned when the organization sent me their edited version of my article. It bore little resemblance to my original article, though they had not interjected it with crude language. Had they done so, I would have politely pulled the article.

However, when the printed version premiered, it contained language that I had neither written nor had been in the edited version. Someone decided that “sodomy” needed to be interwoven into my article. Am I mad? Absolutely! Do I have a right to be? Absolutely!

Any publishing group has the right to edit and/or reject an article they have asked to be written. What they do not have is the right to punctuate my article with denigrating terms and send it to the printer without my foreknowledge. Had I known, I would have said “no way.”

No, I have not decided how to respond to this travesty. I am open to suggestions – which can be emailed at http://www.crossministry.org/contact.php (You may remain anonymous if you like)

“Should we care about homosexuals?”

_________________

Create a Caption
We recently asked you to write a caption for this cartoon - emphasizing
homosexuality from a redemptive perspective.  Here are some we received. 
Vote on your favorite caption or comment here.

“As we stand to sing ‘Throw out the life line’
let’s remember that homosexuals need a life line too.”

“If we don’t express Christian love to homosexuals, how will
they ever know the real thing?”

Pastor Bratwurst was taken back when, after quoting “and such were
some of you”, seventeen of his members jumped to their feet and
shouted “I’m one of those ‘some of you.’”

“Yes, God loves the homosexual just as he is...but God loves him too
much to let him stay that way.”

“If the Corinthian Church could love people out of homosexuality, why
can’t our church?”

“Faithful parishioners, we can not lead homosexual to Christ with a
clenched fist.”

“My dear people, Christian love needs to come out of the
closet.”

“After 20 years of prayer, I’ve come to the conclusion that my
ranting and raving about homosexuality is a deterrent to sharing Christ
with them.”

Half the congregation fainted when choir member Brother Bromide began his
testimony of having left homosexuality 32 years before. The other half of
the congregation died in their pews.

“After a vigorous debate during last week’s Deacons’
meeting, we have decided it is OK for you to mention your homosexual
friends in your prayer requests.”

“Our men’s ministry project for this month is witnessing
outside the Trade St gay bar.”

“What Did Jesus Really mean to love your neighbor as yourself?”

“If you don’t know what to say to a homosexual, try something
novel  - like listening.”

“This evening the ladies from the ‘Pushing 80 Sunday School
Class’ will tell us about their visit to the local AIDS
hospice.”

“Our own Horton Smellfungus will now share his testimony of freedom
from homosexuality as our organist softly plays ‘We’ve a story
to tell to the nation.’”

________________

We ask for and appreciate your prayerful and financial help!

Dr John R. W. Stott turns 87!

I (that's me on the right in my late 20's) met Dr. John Stott during a
seminary trip to London.  In this photo, Stott autographs my copy of his
book "Between Two Worlds: the art of preaching in the 20th century" -  a
classic.

Happy Birthday Dr. Stott!

_________________

A partner of Cross Ministry writes

I have traveled a long journey through life with several careers and
lifestyles searching for the epitome of success with many mountains and
valleys.  With each mountain I felt I had reached it, YET, there was never
total fulfillment.  The hunger continued for satisfaction!  Money and
material things cease to satisfy my desires for happiness.
 
As a young child with great parents I started under their guidance on the
journey in the right direction.  However, in my teens I left the safety of
my parents and stepped into the "world" of fascination.  I would follow
that life's journey until I was in my sixties - when I found a void and
hunger in my soul that fame or fortune could not fulfill. 
 
Before my mother died I promised her I would make my journey back in the
right direction. It took me several years searching for the one thing that
could fill that void in my inner-being.
 
It was not until I moved to San Antonio and continued my search that I
happened upon the beginning of the mostamazing discovery in my entire
life.  I never knew that there was something so simple, yet complex, that
could consume my very being.  Giving me a total commitment that I will
hold to death takes me into the realm of eternal saturation of "LIGHT AND
SPIRIT"!
 
If you will just take a moment, I’d like to share that with you in a
song, not sung by me, but mirrors my  heart and soul.  This will be my
epitaph........

www.crossministry.org

Guys,

how many times have we heard that God loves us all. How come there is always a "but" attached?

Let's go into the different versions of this:

1) Sometimes hetereosexuals would come up with something like "God loves you just as you are, but He loves you way too much to leave you this way". Now I have used this one many times myself, but I rather refrain from doing so - even though it is basically right. There are different reasons to that: First, it does sound kind of strange to me in the mouth of someone who does not experience same-sex attractions. The sort of "He loves you, but" thing. Plus sometimes I have the feeling that people tend to forget that this applies to them, too. Sure - I do not know their inner motivation (which probably is the very best) and far be it for me to judge them, but please let's rephrase that a little.

2) Then you hear phrases like "God is love - and He loves all of us, no matter what" from people actively involved in the gay life. Again: basically it is true, but the motivation for such a statement probably is to justify whatever a person sees as being alright (like "being gay") - and still be a Christian. Sort of make your own religion or model the one that you have according to your personal needs. Now I do not want to mock at them, as the need and motivation behind that usually is a genuine love for the Lord - somehow gone over the top.

3) Finally you hear things like the one mentioned above ("God loves you just as you are, but He loves you way too much to leave you this way) from ex-gays, that is from people who love the Lord too much to live out their same-sex attractions and seek freedom from homosexuality. Again: why does there always have to be a "but" attached? Now you might tell me that the Bibel warns us to act out with the same sex and leave the righteous path (which is undoubtedly right) and also the Lord sees into our hearts, so acting out is not the only problem. All of that is true - but no matter what His love comes first - no matter what. His love (just as faith in general) is a gift of grace from God, that we get without anything to do on our part. Sort of a credit. In that sense the Lord loves us - no but attached. We have a father-son relationship (not for nothing we see sin as refusal of sonship and love!) with the father doing the first step. You see lots of examples for that in the Bible (like Jesus freeing the prostitute they wonted to stone - only afterwards He tells her to sin no more. Or the pharisee and the sinner both praying and the Lord taking the sinner's side - without any promise of repenting on his part). Or salvation itself, which is always a gift of grace - for each and every Christian denomination. THEN comes the obedience part, the repentance, the living out the faith  in works and so on. And yes - it is crucial for us to remember that: we have to sin no more.

The problem for people who seek freedom of homosexuality is not so much the "but" part. Most of them are Christians and pretty well aware of the fact that homosexual acts and phantasies are sinful. It is more the "love" part that is hard for them to accept, so insting on the "but" doesn't really help much (even though it is important to make sure not to fall again).

And yes, we are aware of the fact that God looks into our hearts, too (so lustful fantsies would be unacceptable - like for any other man!), but the problem with that is that many among us think the fact that they have "those feelings" is by itself both a sin and a sign of not having experienced healing (or in other words: having failed/sinned again). We might start putting ourselves down for that and even hating ourselves - instead of remembering the "love" part and trustfully accepting the cross each and every man on earth has to carry.

How come people with same-sex attractions feel most comfortable in the gay scene? That should be a warning for the church: obviously, it has missed its mission if "people like us"  feel uncomfortable there. If we only find love and acceptance in the scene (even though most of us later on find out, that this is not really the love and acceptance we thought it was - but still we might see it as better or at least not as bad - as what we usually get).

That's why it is so important for me to stress the good in recovery (even though it is a long and hard road), the acceptance of ourselves, the belief in the love of God and the love for oneself as a basis to love God, the neighbor and also to start repenting, turning toward God and changing things (and letting Him change us). We do that out of love - and not (only) because we are scared of the consequences it might have.

Does that make sense to you?

Robert

idea.de: Homosexuelle Geistliche sind akzeptiert

Gott schuf nicht Adam und Adam

Struggling Alone

Former Lesbian Exhorts Christians to Balance Truth With Love When Ministering to Homosexuals

Order of Canada Awarded to Gay Pastor Who Attacked Vatican, Performed Illegal Gay 'Marriages' under Conservative Government

The Standard of Liberty Foundation: An Open Letter to Those Who Experience Homosexual Thoughts, Feelings, Or Behaviors, Their Friends And Families

Lutherans Say 'Committed' Relationships OK for Gay Clergy

Pure Love Club: Considering that 10 % of the population is gay, don't you think the Church just needs to get with it?

How We Should Respond to Homosexuality - 1

How We Should Respond to Homosexuality - 2

kath.net: Limburg: Kein Segen für homosexuelle Paare

katholisch.de: DBK begrüßt Instruktion zu homosexuellen Priestern

Tim Wilkins: Preaching on homosexuality - Taking the Road Less Traveled

California Catholic Daily: "You can church-shop and find a local parish that is accepting” Membership in homosexual-oriented churches nosedives as mainline religions – including Catholicism – become more ‘gay-friendly’

bpnews.net: SBC is making progress in ministry to homosexuals

kath.net: Spaltung der Anglikaner scheint unausweichlich

OneNewsNow.com: Evangelical Lutherans abandon Bible teaching on homosexuality

 kath.net: USA: Homosexuelle evangelische Pastoren dürfen zusammen leben

Joe Dallas

Would You Have Enough Courage?

Homosexuality, The Church & Society


What Loving Homosexuals Requires - Ten Steps by Tim Wilkins

James Wimbush, Homosexuality & the Black Church, S2E22 from Pure Passion on Vimeo.

Booth, Johnson, Homosexuality & the Church. S2E16 from Pure Passion on Vimeo.