In Loving Memory of Todd E. Mills
    10/15/65 ~ 1/20/03


 
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Todd near the water...where he loved to be


Your Pain

No One Saw

Your Cries

No One Heard

Your Hurt

No One Felt

Your Anger

Directed Inward

Your Sadness

Through Your Laughter

Your Confusion

Never Cleared

Your Fear

Overwhelming

Your Smile

Seldom Showing

Your Self

Unknowing

Your Voice

Often Silent

Your Heart

Not Beating

Your Demons

Now Resting

Your Death

Destruction

 

© L. Cole March 2003



Shades of Blue

                      ~Forever~

Not a Day Goes By When I Don't Think of You,

Not Even One Moment in Time,

I Never Thought I'd Have to Give You Up,

And Let Memories Be My Guide,

Although, Now Sorrow Fills My Soul,

And Sympathy Runs Free,

I Still Know That You're in Heaven,

Watching Over Me,

I'll Do My Best, In Everything,

Knowing All the While,

That You Are Watching Over Me,

And You're Beaming With a Smile,

I Know You Are Still With Me,

Though I Can't See Your Face,

And I Will Never Again,

Feel Your Warm Embrace,

Though, For a Long Time,

Tears Will Fall Like Rain,

From My Eyes,

I'll Never Recover From the Pain,

Of Saying My Last Goodbyes,

Forever, I'll Be Filled With Sorrows,

I'll Love You For an Eternity,

Maybe Even Longer,

As Long as Your Spirit is With Me,

I Know I Will Grow Stronger,

You Are My Guardian Angel,

You Always Have Been,

You Always Will Be,

Because I know,

Forever,

You Are Watching Over Me...

I Love You, I Always Will.

              ~ © 2003 Kiriana Mills (Todd's beautiful daughter and my beautiful niece)

***Kiriana wrote this poem for her Daddy 2 days after his death. She was 11 at the time. Permission was granted to add her poem on my memorial site. Visit her memorial site for her Dad at http://www.freewebs.com/inmemorytem ***

 

~ The Invisible Cord ~

We are connected, my Siblings and I,
By an invisible cord, not seen by the eye.
It's not like the cord that connects us at birth.
This cord can't be seen by any on Earth.

This cord does it's work right from the start.
It binds us together attached at the heart.
I know that it's there, though no one can see
This invisible cord from my siblings and me.

The strength of this cord is hard to describe.
It can't be destroyed, it can't be denied.
It's stronger then any cord man could create,
withstands any test, can hold any weight.

And though you are gone, and not here with me,
The cord is still there, though no one can see.
It pulls at my heart, I am bruised I am sore.
But this cord is my lifeline like never before.

I am thankful that God connects us this way,
Brother and sisters, death can't take away.

Terri Apostolakos
©  October 10, 2001


He Only Took My Hand

Last night while I was trying to sleep
my brother's voice I did hear.
I opened my eyes and looked around but he did not appear.
He said, "You've got to listen. You've got to understand;
God didn't take me from you, He only took my hand.
When I cried out in pain that morning, the instant that I died,
He reached down and took my hand, and pulled me to his side.
He pulled me up and saved me, from the misery and pain.
My body so badly wounded I could never be the same.
My search is finally over now, I've found happiness within.
All the answers to empty dreams, and all I might have been.
I love you all and miss you so... please don't keep asking why.
My body's gone forever, but my spirit will never die!
So live until we meet again, and please try to understand
God didn't take me from you, He only took my hand.

                                                 ~Author Unknown

(Note: I modified this from my sister's to my brother's)

 

~Letter To All Who Are Grieving~

I'm sorry that you're hurting so desperately right now. I know how painful the seconds, and minutes, and days can be, how long the nights are. I understand how very hard hanging on is, and how much courage it takes. I ask though that you hold onto one day at a time. Just one day, and slowly this despair will pass. The feelings you fear you're trapped in will serve their purpose, and then fade away. Difficult to imagine isn't it? Almost impossible to believe when every cell in your body it seems cries out in agony, desperately in need of comfort. When it feels like the only thing in the whole world that can touch your pain and banish it is beyond your grasp. And after all this time, the assurance that you will heal has become an empty, broken promise. Just let one tiny cell in your body continue to believe in the promise of healing. Just one. You can surrender every other cell to your despair. Just that one little cell of faith that you can heal and be whole again is enough to keep you going, is enough to lead you through the darkness. Although it can't banish your suffering, it can sustain you until the time comes for you to let your pain go. And the letting go can only occur in it's own time, as much as we would like to push the pain away forever. Hold on. Hold on to appreciate the beauty of the earth, to feel the songs of the birds in your heart, to learn and to teach, to laugh a genuine laugh, to dance on the beach, to rest peacefully, to experience contentment, to want to be no other place but in the here and now, to trust in yourself, and to trust your life. Hold on because it's worth the terrible waiting. Hold on because you are worthy. Hold on because the wisdom that will follow you out of this darkness will be a tremendous gift. Hold on because you have so much love and joy waiting to be experienced... Hold on because life is precious, even though it can bring terrible losses. Hold on because there is so much that you can't now imagine waiting ahead on your journey ...a destiny that only you can fulfill. Hold on although your exhausted and your grasp is shaky, and you want more than anything to let go sometimes, hold on even though. Please hold on. So much in life can be difficult, even impossible to understand. I know, I know...So many of us have cried in despair, why? why? why? and still the answers and the comfort failed to show. Survival can be a long and lonely road, in spite of all those who've stumbled down the path before you. And it can be a treacherous, torturous journey...so easy to get lost, and yet impossible to avoid even one painful step. And the light, the light at the end of the dark tunnel for so long cannot be seen, although eventually you'll begin to feel its' warmth as you move forward. And forward you must move in order to get through the hell of remembering, of despair, of rage, of grief. Keep looking forward please. Rest if you must, doubt your ability to survive the journey if you have to, but never let go of the guide ropes, although when you close your fingers around them, your hands feel empty, they are there. Please trust me, they are there.When you're exhausted, when all you have to count on is a weakened, weary faith, hold on. When you think you want to die, hold on until you recognize that it's not death you seek, but for the pain to go away. Hold on, because this darkness will surely fade away. Hold on. Please hold on.
by Tammie Byram Fowles, LISW, Ph.D

I Stood By Your Bed

I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.

I could see that you were crying, you found it hard to sleep.

I spoke to you softly as you brushed away a tear,

"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."

I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,

You were thinking of the many times your hands reached out to me.

I was with you at the shops today, your arms were getting sore.

I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.

I was with you at my grave today, you tend it with such care.

I want to reassure you, that I'm not lying there.

I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.

I gently put my hand on you, I smiled and said "it's me."

You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.

I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.

It's possible for me to be so near you every day.

To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."

You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew ...

in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.

The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning

and say "goodnight, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."

And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,

I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.

I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.

Be patient, live your journey out ... then come home to be with me.

~ Author Unknown

 

When Someone is Too Bruised to be Touched

Fr. Ron Rolheiser July 7, 2002

A few days ago, I was asked to visit a family who had, just that day, lost their 19 year-old son to suicide. There isn't much one can offer by way of consolation, even faith consolation, at a moment like this, when everyone is in shock and the pain is so raw. Few things can so devastate us as the suicide of a loved one, especially of one's own child. There is the horrific shock of losing a loved one so suddenly which, just of itself, can bring us to our knees; but, with suicide, there are other soul-wrenching feelings too, confusion, guilt, second-guessing, religious anxiety. Where did we fail this person? What might we still have done? What should we have noticed? What is this person's state with God? What needs to be said about all of this: First of all, that suicide is a disease and the most misunderstood of all sicknesses. It takes a person out of life against his or her will, the emotional equivalent of cancer, a stroke, or a heart attack. Second, we, those left behind, need not spend undue energy second-guessing as to how we might have failed that person, what we should have noticed, and what we might still have done to prevent the suicide. Suicide is an illness and, as with any sickness, we can love someone and still not be able to save that person from death. God loved this person too and, like us, could not, this side of eternity, do anything either. Finally, we shouldn't worry too much about how God meets this person on the other side. God's love, unlike ours, can go through locked doors and touch what will not allow itself to be touched by us. Is this making light of suicide? Hardly. Anyone who has ever dealt with either the victim of a suicide before his or her death or with those grieving that death afterwards knows that it is impossible to make light of it. There is no hell and there is no pain like the one suicide inflicts. Nobody who is healthy wants to die and nobody who is healthy wants to burden his or her loved ones with this kind of pain. And that's the point: This is only done when someone isn't healthy. The fact that medication can often prevent suicide should tell us something. Suicide is an illness not a sin. Nobody just calmly decides to commit suicide and burden his or her loved ones with that death any more than anyone calmly decides to die of cancer and cause pain. The victim of suicide (in all but rare cases) is a trapped person, caught up in a fiery, private chaos that has its roots both in his or her emotions and in his or her bio-chemistry. Suicide is a desperate attempt to end unendurable pain, akin to one throwing oneself through a window because one's clothing is on fire. Many of us have known victims of suicide and we know too that in almost every case that person was not full of ego, pride, haughtiness, and the desire to hurt someone.Generally it's the opposite. The victim has cancerous problems precisely because he or she is wounded, raw, and too-bruised to have the necessary resiliency needed to deal with life. Those of us who have lost loved ones to suicide know that the problem is not one of strength but of weakness, the person is too-bruised to be touched. I remember a comment I over-heard at a funeral for a suicide victim. The priest had preached badly, hinting that this suicide was somehow the man's own fault and that suicide was always the ultimate act of despair. At the reception afterwards a neighbour of the victim expressed his displeasure at the priest's homily: "There are a lot of people in this world who should kill themselves," he lamented bitterly, "but those kind never do! This man is the last person who should have killed himself because he was one of the most sensitive people I've ever met!" A book could be written on that statement. Too often it is precisely the meek who seem to lose the battle, at least in this world. Finally, I submit that we shouldn't worry too much about how God meets our loved ones who have fallen victim to suicide. God, as Jesus assures us, has a special affection for those of us who are too-bruised and wounded to be touched. Jesus assures us too that God's love can go through locked doors and into broken places and free up what's paralyzed and help that which can no longer help itself. God is not blocked when we are. God can reach through. And so our loved ones who have fallen victim to suicide are now inside of God's embrace, enjoying a freedom they could never quite enjoy here and being healed through a touch that they could never quite accept from us.


Published: Friday, July 30, 2004
Suicide -- the misunderstood death

By Rev. Ron Rolheiser, OMI

Death is always painful, but its pains are compounded considerably if its cause is suicide. When a suicide occurs, we aren't just left with the loss of a person, we're also left with a legacy of anger, second-guessing, and fearful fearful anxiety.So each year I write a column on suicide, hoping that it might help produce more understanding around the issue and, in a small way perhaps, offer some consolation to those who have lost a loved one to this dreadful disease. Essentially, I say the same things each year because they need to be said. As Margaret Atwood once put it, some things need to be said and said and said again, until they don't need to be said any more. That's true of suicide.What needs to be said, and said again, about it?First of all that it's a disease and perhaps the most misunderstood of all diseases. We tend to think that if a death is self-inflicted it is voluntary in a way that death through physical illness or accident is not. For most suicides, this isn't true. A person who falls victim to suicide dies, as the does the victim of a terminal illness or fatal accident, not by his or her own choice. When people die from heart attacks, strokes, cancer, AIDS, and accidents, they die against their will. The same is true suicide, except that in the case of suicide the breakdown is emotional rather than physical -- an emotional stroke, an emotional cancer, a breakdown of the emotional immune-system, an emotional fatality.This is not an analogy. The two kinds of heart attacks, strokes, cancers, breakdowns of the immune-system, and fatal accidents, are identical in that, in neither case, is the person leaving this world on the basis of a voluntary decision of his or her own will. In both cases, he or she is taken out of life against his or her own will. That's why we speak of someone as a "victim" of suicide.Given this fact, we should not worry unduly about the eternal salvation of a suicide victim, believing (as we used to) that suicide is always an act of ultimate despair. God is infinitely more understanding that we are, and God's hands are infinitely safer and more gentle than our own. Imagine a loving mother having just given birth, welcoming her child onto her breast for the first time. That, I believe, is the best image we have available to understand how a suicide victim (most often an overly sensitive soul) is received into the next life.Again, this isn't an analogy. God is infinitely more understanding, loving, and motherly than any mother on earth. We need not worry about the fate of anyone, no matter the cause of death, who exits this world honest, over-sensitive, gentle, over-wrought, and emotionally-crushed. God's understanding and compassion exceed our own.Knowing all of this however, doesn't necessarily take away our pain (and anger) at losing someone to suicide. Faith and understanding aren't meant to take our pain away but to give us hope, vision, and support as we walk within it.Finally, we should not unduly second-guess when we lose a loved one to suicide: "What might I have done? Where did I let this person down? If only I had been there? What if ...?" It can be too easy to be haunted with the thought: "If only I'd been there at the right time." Rarely would this have made a difference. Indeed, most of the time, we weren't there for the exact reason that the person who fell victim to this disease did not want us to be there. He or she picked the moment, the spot, and the means precisely so that we wouldn't be there. Perhaps it's more accurate to say that suicide is a disease that picks its victim precisely in such a way so as to exclude others and their attentiveness. This should not be an excuse for insensitivity, especially towards those suffering from dangerous depression, but it should be a healthy check against false guilt and fruitless second-guessing.We're human beings, not God. People die of illness and accidents all the time, and all the love and attentiveness in the world often cannot prevent a loved one from dying. Suicide is a sickness and there are some sicknesses that all the care and love in the world cannot cure.A faith response to suicide should not be horror, fear for the victim's eternal salvation, or guilty second-guessing about how we failed this person. Suicide is indeed a horrible way to die, but we must understand it (at least in most cases) as a sickness, a disease, an illness, a tragic breakdown within the emotional immune-system. And then we must trust, in God's goodness, God's understanding, God's power to descend into hell, and God's power to redeem all things, even death, even death by suicide.

Oblate of Mary Immaculate Father Ronald Rolheiser is a specialist in the
field of spirituality and systematic theology.



Inspiration & Grief Quotes

I love quotes. Here are some om my very favorite that have given me hope, comfort and at times when things are the hardest, hope and strength to go on.

 

The love that once was born can not die
For it has become part of us, of our life,
Woven into the very texture of our being.
Each of us would wish to leave some part of ourselves,
So here and now we bear witness to the one we knew in life,
Who now in death bequeaths a subtle part, precious and beloved,
Which will be with us in truth and beauty,
In dignity and courage and love
To the end of our days.

~Algernon Black

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter

~Martin Luther King, Jr.

In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invincible summer.

~Albert Camus

Suffering and joy teach us, if we allow them, how to make the leap of empathy, which transports us into the soul and heart of another person. ln those transparent moments we know other people's joys and sorrows, and we care about their concerns as if they were our own.

~Fritz Williams

Deep unspeakable suffering may well be called a baptism, a regeneration, the initiation into a new state

~George Eliot

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.

~Helen Keller

You know quite well, deep within you, that there is only a single magic, a single power, a single salvation...and that is called loving. Well, then, love your suffering. Do not resist it, do not flee from it. It is your aversion that hurts, nothing else.

~Hermann Hesse

We are healed of a suffering only by expressing it to the full

~Marcel Proust

Where there is love, there is pain.

~Spanish Proverb

 

The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.

~Albert Einstein

 

I am only one,
But still I am one.
I cannot do everything,
But still I can do something;
And because I cannot do everything
I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.

~Edward Everett Hale

To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.

~Elbert Hubbard

You must do the things you think you cannot do

~Eleanor Roosevelt

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent in doing nothing.

~George Bernard Shaw

I long to accomplish a great and noble tasks, but it is my chief duty to accomplish humble tasks as though they were great and noble. The world is moved along, not only by the mighty shoves of its heroes, but also by the aggregate of the tiny pushes of each honest worker.

~Helen Keller

Never doubt that a small, group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.

~Margaret Mead

A lot of people are waiting for Martin Luther King or Mahatma Gandhi to come back -- but they are gone. We are it. It is up to us. It is up to you.

~Marian Wright Edelman

It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.

~Theodore Roosevelt

From a speech given in Paris at the Sorbonne in 1910

If you were all alone in the universe with no one to talk to, no one with which to share the beauty of the stars, to laugh with, to touch, what would be your purpose in life? It is other life, it is love, which gives your life meaning. This is harmony. We must discover the joy of each other, the joy of challenge, the joy of growth

~Mitsugi Saotome

The dogmas of the quiet past are inadequate to the stormy present. The occasion is piled high with difficulty, and we must rise with the occasion. As our case is new, so we must think anew and act anew.

~Abraham Lincoln

There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.

~Anais Nin

They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.

~Andy Warhol

The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be the beginning

~Ivy Baker Priest

The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.

~M. Scott Peck

We are not born all at once, but by bits. The body first, and the spirit later; and the birth and growth of the spirit, in those who are attentive to their own inner life, are slow and exceedingly painful. Our mothers are racked with the pains of our physical birth; we ourselves suffer the longer pains of our spiritual growth.

~Mary Antin

Life is a progress, and not a station.

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.

~Thomas A. Kempis

You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star.

~Nietzsche

A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.

~Albert Einstein

Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for the truth.

~Benjamin Disraeli

We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms -- to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.

~Viktor Frankel

 

We cannot hold a torch to light another's path without brightening our own.

~Ben Sweetland

If you have knowledge, let others light their candles in it.

~Margaret Fuller

When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe. I am related to the earliest times, and to the latest.

~Henry David Thoreau

Moral cowardice that keeps us from speaking our minds is as dangerous to this country as irresponsible talk. The right way is not always the popular and easy way. Standing for right when it is unpopular is a true test of moral character.

~Margaret Chase Smith

The best way out is always through.

~Robert Frost

To go against the dominant thinking of your friends, of most of the people you see every day, is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.

~Theodore H. White

In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity

~Albert Einstein

Difficulties increase the nearer we get to the goal.

~Goethe

Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.

~Oscar Wilde

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

~Thomas Alva Edison

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up

~Thomas Alva Edison

Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.

~Dale Carnegie

If I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain.
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again,
I shall not live in vain

~Emily Dickinson

Life is a succession of lessons, which must be lived to be understood

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

In these days, a man who says a thing cannot be done is quite apt to be interrupted by some idiot doing it.

~Elbert Hubbard

To live in this world you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go.

~Mary Oliver Blackwater Woods

 

The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly; it is dearness only that gives everything its value. I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress and grow brave by reflection. 'Tis the business of little minds to shrink; but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles unto death

~Thomas Paine

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.

~Albert Einstein

The personal life deeply lived always expands into truths beyond itself.

~Anais Nin

I don't know what your destiny will be, but one thing I do know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found how to serve.

~Albert Schweitzer

The first duty of a human being is to assume the right functional relationship to society -- more briefly, to find your real job, and do it.

~Charlotte Perkins Gilman

Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little.

~Edmund Burke

Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.

~Martin Luther King, Jr.

Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.

~Rainer Maria Rilke

Letters to a Young Poet

To repeat what others have said, requires education, to challenge it,
requires brains.

~Mary Pettibone Poole

No one, Eleanor Roosevelt said, can make you feel inferior without your consent. Never give it.

~Marian Wright Edelman

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.

~Garrison Keillor

A room without books is like a body without a soul.

~Cicero

The greatest gift is a passion for reading. It is cheap, it consoles, it distracts, it excites, it gives you the knowledge of the world and experience of a wide kind. It is a moral illumination.

~Elizabeth Hardiwick

Believe, when you are most unhappy, that there is something for you to do in the world. So long as you can sweeten another's pain, life is not in vain.

 ~Helen Keller

If you love deeply, you will grieve deeply, If you deny your grief, you deny the reality of the love you felt

~Dianne McKendree

No bond in closer union knits to human hearts than fellowship in grief

~Robert Southey in Joan of Arc & Minor Poems

Your profession is not what brings home your paycheque. Your profession is what you were put on earth to do...with such passion and such intensity that it becomes spiritual in calling.

~Vincent Van Gogh

The day we fear as our last is but the birthday of eternity

~Seneca

One of the most adventurous things left us is to go to bed. For no one can lay a hand on our dreams.

~E.V. Lucas

Suicide grief isn't the kind of life experience that just knocks on one's door. Rather, it kicks the door in to show itself full in the survivor's face.

~Carol J. Billow

If you're going through hell, keep going

~Winston Churchill

As long as I can I will look at this world for both of us. As long as I can I will laugh with the birds, I will sing with the flowers, I will pray to the stars, for both of us.

~Sascha

Seeing death as the end of life is like seeing the horizon as the end of the ocean

~David Searls

Grief knits two hearts in closer bonds than happiness ever can; and common sufferings are far stronger links than common joys.

~Alponse de Lamartine

The cure for grief is motion

~Elbert Hubbard

To spare oneself from grief at all cost can be achieved only at the price of total detachment, which excludes the ability to experience happiness

~Erich Fromm

He that conceals his grief finds no remedy for it

~Turkish proverb

There is no grief like the grief that does not speak

~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Suppressed grief suffocates, it rages within the breast, and is forced to multiply its strength

~Ovid

Tearless grief bleeds inwardly

~Christina Nevell Bovee

Happiness is beneficial for the body, but it is grief that develops the power of the mind

~Marcel Proust

...Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but - I hope - into better shape.

~Charles Dickens




©2004 Lori Cole

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