“HEY WATCH WHERE YOUR GOING KATSUYA!” shouted an infuriated Kaiba.

“YOU RAN IN TO ME IDIOT, SHOVE OFF” retorted and equally pissed of Jounouchi.

“Make me you mutt!” sneered Kaiba.

Jounouchi had just about had it with Kaiba, he couldn’t stand he’s I’m rich pain in the ass mockery right now, He was in a hurry “Oh Fuck of rich boy” he replied angrily, retrieving his dropped books he moved away in a hurry.

Kaiba smirked and almost laughed at the silly blonde, then was about to walk away himself when he noticed something lying on the ground. That’s odd I don’t remember dropping anything it must have been Jounouchi’s. Kaiba picked up the paper from the ground and unfolded it carefully. He was expecting some strange note between Jounouchi and one of his mindless friends or a homework assignment never to be completed, what he found was neither of these things. It was a picture but not the kind one usually finds, a quick scribble while one was bored in class. It was elaborate, every detail was exact, perfect, it was an exact likeness and it was him.

Dam that stupid idiot Kaiba, why does he have to be such an ass? Jounouchi was in a very bad mood as he wandered down the school hall. After all he hadn’t had a good day, first he arrived at school managing to forget his homework, Yuugi was sick and wasn’t at school that day, then he got caught sleeping in class and now he had a another thing too add to the list, his run in with Kaiba. Could this day get worse?

Jounouchi should know better then to say that for right then he heard a voice call his name. “Jounouchi where are you, you mutt”. It was Kaiba. Perfect just what I need. “WHAT IS THIS KATSUYA” he screamed waving the picture. Oh fuck, no one was supposed to see that, especially HIM. N-n-nothing, “I was just bored in class and you were sitting in front of me and I was bored…you know…” Jounouchi stammered. Okay Kaiba you got you explanation now just turn around and walk away... Dam it he is coming closer, what does he want.

“Wow Jounouchi, I didn’t know the mutt was so artistic, I guess everyone needs at least one talent even if it is a lousy one” Kaiba teased in a mocking tone. Jounouchi lost it this was too much from Kaiba he lunged at the brunet. Kaiba hadn’t been expecting it; he had thought the blonde would have learned from all his previous failed attacks to just give up. Jounouchi actually managed to knock Kabia down and get over him while he was on the ground before Kaiba realized it. “I HATE YOU SETO, YOUR SUCH AN ARROGANT BASTARD, WHY DO YOU GOTTA PICK ON ME ALL THE TIME IS’T ENOUGH THAT YOUR SO FILTHY RICH AND I’M NOT DO YOU ALLWAYS GOT TO RUB IT IN MY FACE, AND YOUR REALLY HOT” Jounouchi screamed inches away from Seto’s confused face. Oh no I didn’t just say that. Jounouchi stopped screaming and found him self looking in to Kaiba’s cold crystal eyes. What he saw confused him, Kaiba, wasn’t pissed. Kaiba could have thrown me off long before if he had wanted to so why hasn’t he?

Looking up at the amber eyes inches from his face Seto Kaiba was for once in his life scared, for some reason try as he might he couldn’t bring himself so shove Jounouchi off him. He couldn’t even read the expression on the blondes face. What was he doing to him? What does he want? He’s moving closer, and closer. The next thing he knew was that Jounouchi’s mouth was on his, and they were kissing. He and Jou were kissing in the deserted school hallway and he couldn’t be happier.

|Note From You| |Note From You - Part 2 of Picture of You|

Okay, Joey thought. What the fuck just happened? He was sitting in the middle of the school hallway. Right the hallway, where Kaiba kissed me? He froze. No, that’s not right...Where I kissed Kaiba...no that’s not it. I know we kissed. That much I can remember. But who started the kissing. Was it me, why would I do that, I hate him. Did I just want him to shut up? Okay it’s no use thinking about it, I'll just have to ask him tomorrow since he's run away. Oh boy that won't be awkward at all. “Hey Seto, remember how we kissed yesterday?” “You do, well okay; I was just wondering what did you mean by that.” Yeah sounds like a great plan. Joey dragged himself off the floor and made for the school exit.

"oh Shit" were the elegant words of Seto Kaiba, as he ran out the school doors. This can't be happening to me, that mutt kissed me. He had reached his car door. Okay it never happened, it was just some weird dream and I'm gonna wake up any minute. No not dream nightmare. He opened the car door and got in. fuck fuck fuck. Joey was coming out of the school. Fuck fuck fuck. He was coming this way. Ugh, what am I doing I'm in a car so I can just leave. Kaiba stared the car and speed off.

"Hey wait!" well that was productive. Joey stopped chasing Kaiba's car as it speed off into the distance. Oh well what would I have said to him anyway. Joey wondered as he walked home.

"Joseph Wheeler, YOU’RE LATE...again!” Said his teach Mrs. I've-got-a-stick-up-my-ass-and-it-makes-me-happy-when-I-can-be-mean-to-students. Okay, so he didn't really know her real name. But he had made one up for her. Well isn't this just a great way to start the day. Joey thought as he looked around for a seat. And it just keeps getting better. The only seat was right next to his favorite person ever...Kaiba. Joey out of breath from running to school sat down. Kaiba smirked. Joey stuck out his tongue. Okay so it wasn't the most mature thing ever.

The teacher droned on about something, it was probably unimportant. Kaiba didn't care. He was busy on his laptop when Joey had come in late. Ha, what a loser. Probably got lost on the way to school. He scribbled a quick note, crumpled it into a ball and threw it a certian blonde haired boy.

Joey who was drifting off to sleep woke up when the paper ball hit him in the head. He unfolded it and read: "So what happend wheeler, the dog catcher find you?" He instantly knew it was from Kaiba. Why Kaiba would write him a note he did not know. He looked over a Kaiba. Look at him just sitting there like he is so much better then everyone, doing work on his laptop for his million dollar country, yeah right work, he was probably downloading porn.

He glanced back at the note and scribbled a response. "I might be a dog but at least I don't go around kissing them." and tossed the note back to Kaiba. I know I just called myself a dog but it will be so worth it to see his reaction.

Kaiba opened the note and his face palled. Damn I thought maybe he forgot. besides I did not kiss that mutt he tried to kiss me. Well I'll just have to set him straight. He wrote a note back to Joey.

Joey opened the new note from Kaiba. "Meet me in the bathroom in 5 minutes." Joey replied...

Kaiba opened the note: "Why for hawt gay sex?" He replied

Joey read the note "just do it". As soon as Joey read the note he saw Kaiba leave for the bathroom and 5 minutes later he followed. Why am I doing this Joey wondered as he walked towards the bathroom. He put his hand on the door and debated leaving, but went in after all. He walked in and looked around...no one was there. Figures... then the door slammed and Kaiba was standing in front of the door that was now locked. Kaiba always had a flair for the dramatic.

For a moment the two boys just stood there. Then Kaiba spoke "so Wheeler… what did you mean by that kiss yesterday? I mean I always figured you were gay but..."

"oh shut it Kaiba. Your one to talk the whole school thinks there is something wrong with a guy who wears white trechcoats, tight black leather pants and bondage gear on his arms".

"What about that friend of yours Yugi... he is like a walking bondage store. He’s not as innocent as he seems huh, It must be Yami's kink."

"Oh gross, thanks for that lovely image there Kaiba."

"You know you love it, and your avoiding the question, why did you kiss me?"

"I'm not avoiding it! I didn't kiss you, you kissed me"

“I did no such thing"

God Kaiba was really getting on his nerves

"Yes well I most certainly did not kiss you, and if I was gay you wouldn't be my first choice, so don't flatter yourself"

"What’s that supposed to mean!"

"Nothing, just not everyone worships you!"

"Oh but you do..."

"Yeah I...I WHAT?"

Somehow during their augment they had gotten closer. Joey could fell Kaiba's breath on his cheek. his warm sweet hot breath...WOAH, where did that come from, the Clorox fumes in the bathroom must be going to his head. there was no way he liked Kaiba! Joey looked up and met with Kaiba's cold blue eyes. But for once they didn't look as cold.

"Kaiba...” Joey said quietly

"What...mutt" Kaiba replied still looking a Joey

"Are you okay"

"Why do you care?"

"Because I'm not a cold hearted bastard like you"

"Oh" Said Kaiba absently

"So are you...okay I mean"

"No"

Why do I always wind up in this situation...? Though Joey, what is Kaiba thinking and why is he so close? And why is he so hot? No I did not just think that, stupid Clorox. Uh I can't take this anymore. Joey leaned forward.

"Mphhhh" was Kaiba’s dignified response when he found the blondes lips on his... again

Why can't I move? Though Kaiba. Stupid mutt, stupid sexy, NO not sexy, stupid mutt! But Kaiba didn't pull away; instead he willing leaned towards the shorter blonde.

“Hey guys” called Yugi to his friends after class.

“Have any of you guys seen Joey, he disappeared in the middle of class, and I haven’t seen him since, I’m sort of worried since he left right after Kaiba did. I hope they aren’t fighting or anything.”

“I haven’t seen him Yugi, we could go look for them” replied Tea

“Yeah, I think we probably should, who knows what sort of trouble Joey got into” Said Tristan

“Okay lets go” Yugi smiled, “it shouldn’t take long”. And they went off to look around the school.

“Jeez, It’s been a half-hour already, and no sign of Joey, I thought you said it wouldn’t take long” Duke sighed. The gang had taken a break from look to sit for a minute.

“I thought for sure we would have found him by now.” Yugi looked worried. “You guys wait for me a sec and we’ll look a little more. I gotta go to the bathroom.

Yugi got to the bathroom and when he tried to open it he found he couldn’t. “Hey guys do you know why the bathroom is locked?” he called back to his friends.

“It shouldn’t be hang on” called Tristan as his friends as the came over.

And with the power of friendship and the heart of the cards they were able to open the door. (They just unlocked it on the outside, since Yugi didn’t see the lock on the front)

Oh course opening that door might not have been a good thing.

“SHIT KAIBA, someone is coming in!”

“Well shit. Don’t just stand there.”

The door opened, and there stood, Yugi, Tristan, Duke, and Tea looking quite flabbergasted

“Joey, I said move!” hissed Kaiba.

To which Joey just looked up at Kaiba…. “Uh Kaiba, my hair is caught in you zipper….”

“Stupid mutt…”

|Wallpapers|

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Fruits Basket

Vampire Princess Miyu

Yu-Gi-Oh

Cowboy Bebop

Spirited Away

/Quotes/

Buffy|:| Furuba|:| Cowboy Bebop|:| PotC|:|

.

/Buffy/

X: Oh, hey, you forgot your... stake?

X: I laugh in the face of danger! Then I hide until it goes away.

B: I won't wear my button that says, "I'm a Slayer. Ask me how!"

O: He tried to bite me. What a sissy!

W: Just sitting here watching our barren lives pass us by. Oh, look, a cockroach. *stomp*
X: Let's stop this crazy whirligig of fun. I'm dizzy.

B: It's weird, though. In his way, I feel like he's still watching me.
W: Well, in a way he sort of is...in the way of that he's right over there.

X: To read makes our speaking English good.

X: You know, Buffy, Spring Fling just isn't any dance. It's a time for students to choose, um, a mate. And then we can observe their mating rituals, and tag them before they migrate... just kill me!

X: You were looking at my neck.
A: What?
X: You were checking out my neck, I saw that.
A: No, I wasn't.
X: Just keep your distance, pal.
A: I wasn't looking at your neck.
X: I told you to eat before we left.

C: *bites vampire* See how you like it!

B: "Sieze the moment, 'cause tomorrow you might be dead."
Willow: "Oh that's nice!"

Owen: "So, where do you know Buffy from?"
Angel: "Work."

X: So how did the slaying go....I mean laying... wait I don't mean that either.

W: Cibo Matto? They're playing?
X: No, Willow, they're gonna be clog dancing.
W: Cibo Matto can clog dance?! Oh, sarcasm, right.

B: You're a vampire. Oh, I'm sorry. Is that an offensive term? Should I say 'Undead American'?

S: Where's the phone? I need to call the police. There's some big guy out there trying to bite someone.

W: Wow. Two centuries of dating. If you only had two a year, that's still, like, 400 dates with 400 different... Why do they call it a mace?

X: Okay, that's it. I'm putting a collar with a little bell on that guy.

W: Oh. Sorry. The reflection thing that you don't have... Angel, how do you shave?

B: I told one lie. I had one drink.
G: Yes, and you were very nearly devoured by a giant demon snake. The words, "let that be a lesson" are a tad redundant at this juncture.

B: So, what did you do last night?
A: Nothing.
B: Nothing at all? You ceased to exist?

X: Yeah, I'm gonna have to go with Dead Boy on this one.
A: Could you not call me that?

F: I want to be like you. A vampire.
S: I've known you for two minutes, and I can't stand you. I don't
really feature you livin' forever.... Can I eat him now, love?’

X: Those poor schlubs have to attend school on Saturday.
JC: 9AM okay with you, Xander?
B: You got a bit of schlub on your shoe, there.

B: All right, a regular kid and her cradle-robbing, creature-of-the-night boyfriend

X: Hey, Angel's our friend! Except I don't like him

W: You know, I never really thanked you.
O: Oh, yeah, please don't. I don't do thanks. I get all red. Have to bail. It's not pretty.
W: Well, then, forget that thing, especially with the part where I kind of owe you my life.
O: Oh, look, a monkey. And he has a little hat and little pants.
W: Yeah, I see.
O: The monkey's the only cookie animal that gets to wear clothes, you know that? You have the sweetest smile I've ever seen. So I'm wondering, do the other cookie animals feel sort of ripped? Like, is the hippo going, "Hey, man, where are my pants? I have my hippo dignity." And you know, the monkey's just, "I mock you with my monkey pants!" And then there's a big coup in the zoo.

X: If it weren't for you, people would be lined up five deep waiting to get themselves buried, Willow would be Robbie the robot's love slave, I wouldn't even have a head, and Theresa's a vampire.

O: I spoke to Giles. He said I'll be okay, I just have to lock myself up around the full moon. Only he used more words than that... and a globe.

B: Giles, there has to be some sort of spell to reverse the invitation, right? Like a barrier, a no-shoes, no-pulse, no-service kind of thing?

W: Frogs, frogs! Get them off of me! Oh my god, frogs! Get them off of me! Please, help - get them off! Frogs! Frogs! Oh my god, they're everywhere! Frogs!
Doc: Not her, the other one!
W: No more frogs.

C: And we can still date. Or not... I mean, I understand if you want to see other fish. I'll do everything I can to make your quality of life better, whether that means little bath toys or whatever.

S: It's a big rock. Can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big.

A: I want to learn from you.... but I don't want to dress like you.

B: What do you want?
S: I told you. I want to stop Angel. I want to save the world.
B: Okay, you do remember that you're a vampire, right?
S: We like to talk big... vampires do. "I'm going to destroy the world." That's just tough-guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is, I _like_ this world. You've got... dog racing, Manchester United. And you've got people... billions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs. It's all right here. But then someone comes along with a vision... with a real... passion for destruction. Angel could pull it off. Good-bye, Picadilly, farewell, Leicester-bloody-Square.

J: Have we met?
S: You hit me with an ax one time. Remember? Uh, "Get the hell away from my daughter!"

As: Just tell me what I need to know.
G: In order... to be worthy... you must perform the ritual... in a tutu. Pillock!

O: Well, it's sort of a funny story. You remember when I didn't graduate?
W: Well, I know you had a lot of incompletes, but that's what summer school was for.
O: Yeah. Well, you remember when I didn't go?

G: Unbelievable. "Do you like my mask? Isn't it pretty? It raises the dead." Americans!

G: Oh, good show, Giles.

B: I had to.
A: I loved you.
B: Oh, God, Angel...
A: Go to hell! I did.

B: She gets along with my friends, my Watcher, my Mom. Look, now she's getting along with my fries.

G: Ooo. Copper's got a gun!

G: I am in complete control of my Slayer.
X: Giles! We have a big problem - it's Buffy.

X: Well, as long as she and Angel don't get pelvic, we'll be okay, I guess.

S: No, this is different. Our love was eternal. Literally. You got any of those little marshmallows?

S: Oh, god.
B: What's wrong? Not that I really care.
S: Oh, my head. I think I'm sobering up. It's horrible. Oh, god. I wish I were dead.
B: Well, if you close your eyes and wish real hard...

You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love till it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other until it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood -- blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.

W: Bored now.

A: What's the plan?
B: Don't fall on this.

C: I wish Buffy Summers had never come to Sunnydale.
A: Done.
C: That would be cool. No, wait. I wish Buffy Summers had never been born.
A: Done!
C: And I wish that Xander Harris never again knows the touch of a woman. And that Willow wakes up tomorrow covered in monkey hair.
A: Done!
C: In fact, I wish all men, except maybe the dumb and the really agreeable kind, disappeared off the face of the earth. That would be so cool! Or maybe...

A: I was young. I never had a chance to...
M: To die of syphilis?

J: So, angel's on top again?
B: What?
J: Angel or star?

A: I want to take comfort in you and I know it'll cost me my soul and a part of me doesn't care. I'm weak. I've never been anything else. It's not the demon in me that needs killing, Buffy. It's the man.

G: They're confiscating my books.
B: Giles, we need those books.
G: Believe me, I tried to tell that to the nice man with the big gun

G: "Session interrupted"? Who said you could interrupt, you stupid, useless fad! No, I said fad, and I'll say it again.
X: At that point, I will become frightened.

X: "Frisky Watchers Chat Room." Why, Giles!

B: Yes! You will all be turned into vermin. And some of you will be fish. Yeah, you in the back, will be fish.
Guy: Maybe we should go.

B: Actually, I do have a thing.
A: A thing? A date?
B: Nice attempt at casual. Actually, I do have a date. Older man. Very handsome. Likes it when I call him Daddy.
A: Your father. It is your father, right?

An: What a day. Give me a beer.
Bartender: I.D.
An: //glares//
Bartender: I.D.
An: I'm 1120 years old, just give me a frigging beer!
Bartender: I.D.
An: //sighs// Give me a Coke.

B: Well.
A: Well.
B: That was very artistic.
A: Yeah.
B: It wasn't what I expected. I've never actually seen... Well, from the title, I thought it was about food.
A: Well, there was food...
B: Right, the scene with the... food. So, feel like getting some hot chocolate? Or a cold shower?

B: We can't actually do any of those things. You'd lose your soul, and besides, I don't even own a kimono.

B: I never knew you had so much rage in you.
F: What can I say? I'm the world's best actor.
A: Second best.

A: A lot of things that seem strong, and good, and powerful - they can be painful.
B: Like, say, immortality?
A: Exactly. I'm dying to get rid of that.
B: Funny.
A: I'm a funny guy.

X: What am I gonna do? I think about sex all the time. Sex. Help! 4 times 5 is 30. 5 times 6 is 32. Naked girls. Naked women. Naked Buffy. Oh, stop me!
B: God, Xander, is that all you think about?

B: You had sex with Giles? You had sex with GILES?
J: It was the candy. We were teenagers.
B: On the hood of a police-car?
J: I'll be downstairs. You feel better.
B: Twice?!?

W: He said he wasn't coming back until he'd driven to all 50 states.
B: Did you explain about Hawaii?

X: Basically, I got as far as Oxnard, and the engine fell out of my car. And that was literally. So, I ended up washing dishes at the fabulous "Ladies Night" club for about a month and a half while I tried to pay for the repairs. No one really bothered me, or even spoke to me, until one night when one of the male strippers called in sick, and no power on this earth will make me tell you the rest of that story. Suffice to say I traded my car in for one that wasn't entirely made of rust, came trundling back home to the arms of my loving parents, where everything was exactly as it was except I sleep in the basement, and I have to pay rent. How's college? B: Male strippers?
X: No power on this earth.

X: When it's dark, and I'm all alone, and I'm scared or freaked out or whatever, I always think - "What would Buffy do?" You're my hero. Okay, sometimes when it's dark, and I'm all alone, I'd think, "What is Buffy wearing?"
B: Can that be one of those things you never, ever tell me about?

O: On the plus side, you killed the bench, which was looking shifty.

P: I'm not doing the deep "get sympathy" routine. I mean, don't you just hate guys who are all, "I'm dark and brooding, so give me love."
B: I don't think I've ever met that type.

B: Guy dating Harmony dead. Must be, like, the most tolerant guy in the world.
///scene changes to Spike and Harmony\\\

H: You love that tunnel more than me.
S: I love syphilis more than you.

O: Okay, either I'm borrowing all your albums, or I'm moving in.
G: Oz, there are more important things than records right now.
O: More important than this one?
G: Um, I suppose an argument could be made for...
X: Whoa, Giles has a TV. Everybody, Giles has a TV! He's shallow like us.
O: I got to admit, I'm a little disappointed.
G: I-I-I...
W: Well, maybe it doesn't work. It's like art.
G: Uh... public television!

B: I was just thinking about the life of a pumpkin. Grow up in the sun, happily entwined with others, and then someone comes along, cuts you open, and rips your guts out.

X: Like any of that's enough to fight the Dark Master.
< everyone looks at him >
X: --bator.

G: Oh, my shoe. Silly me. I'll just pop..
. R: No, no, no sir. No more chick-pit for you.

X: Where is he? Where's the creep that turned me into a spider-eating man-bitch?
B: He's gone.
X: Damn it! You know what? I'm sick of this crap. I'm sick of being the guy who eats insects, and gets the funny syphilis. As of this moment, it's over. I'm finished being everybody's butt-monkey.
B: Check. No more butt-monkey.
R: It could have been worse. At least you weren't making time with the Dracu-babes like Giles here.
G: I was not making time, I was just about to kill those loathsome creatures when Riley interrupted me.
R: Really? You were gonna nuzzle 'em to death?

D: Killing things with wood? Ooh, scary vampires -- they die from a splinter.

B: Suck up.
R: What? It's a nice outfit. Besides, "I'm here to violate your firstborn" never goes over with parents. I'm not sure why.

B: You put it in neutral again, huh?
G: I'm just not used to this automatic transmission. I-- I loathe this just sitting here, not contributing. No, no, no, it's not working out.
B: Giles, are you breaking up with your car?
G: Well, it did seduce me, all red and sporty.
B: Little two-door tramp!

X: We will. We're just gonna play with matches, run with scissors, take candy from some guy. I don't know his name.

A: Crap! Look at this-- now I'm burdened with a husband and several tiny pink children, and more cash than I can reasonably manage.
X: That means you're winning.
A: Really?
X: Yes, cash equals good.
A: Ooh! I'm so pleased. Can I trade in the children for more cash?

B: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's just... Harmony has minions!
X: And ruffles have ridges. Buffy, there's actually a more serious side to all this.
B: I sure hope so, 'cause I'm having trouble breathing.

H: I've been doing my homework, reading books and stuff.
S: What, "Evil For Dummies"?

B: Harmony, when you tried to be head cheerleader, you were bad. When you tried to chair the Homecoming committee, you were really bad. But when you try to be bad, you suck.

B: How bored WERE you last year?
G: I watched "Passions" with Spike. Let us never speak of it.

X: Guess the folks are back.
//crashing noises from above///
X: No, no, I was wrong. Just incompetent burglars.

G: Toth.
R: What?
B: He called you a toth. It's a British expression. It means, like, moron.
G: No, Toth's the name of the demon.

X: At first it's just a place, and then you start to make memories. And then you're like... that's where Spike slept. And there, that's where Anya and I drowned a Separvo demon. Oh! And right there, that's where I got my heart all ripped out. I really hate this place.

S: Is it bigger than a breadbox?
H: No. Four left.
S: So it's smaller than a breadbox?
H: No. Only three.
S: Harmony, is it a sodding breadbox?
H: Yes! Oh my god. Someone's Blondie Bear is a 20-questions genius!

D: This place is so... wow. I mean, check out all the magic junk.
G: Our new slogan.

D: What are you doing?
B: My boyfriend. Go away.

B: Don't take this the wrong way, but... < punches Spike in the nose > ...what are you doing here? Five words or less.
S: Out. For. A. Walk.... Bitch.

S: The whole crowd-pleasing "threats and swagger" routine. How stunningly original. You know, I'm just passing through. Satisfied? You know, I really hope so, 'cause god knows you need some satisfaction in life, besides shagging Captain Cardboard, and... and I never really liked you, anyway, and -- and you have stupid hair.

B: You want to take Tara out of here against her will, you gotta come through me.
D: And me.
Dad: Is this a joke? I'm not gonna be threatened by two little girls.
D: You don't want to mess with us.
B: She's a hair-puller.
G: And... you're not just dealing with two little girls.
X: You're dealing with all of us.
S: 'Cept me.
X: 'Cept Spike.
S: I don't care what happens.

X: What's with the hand wave? You see that? Does that, like, mean something?
W: It's code. I think it breaks down to "choo-choo!"
A: It probably means to follow him. That, or wait here for him.
W: //whispering// Ask him.
X: //yelling// Hey, Riley? What's the //hand gesture// all about?
R: It means yell real loud so the vampires who don't know we're coming will have a sporting chance.
X: See, now he's all mad and sarcastic.
W: It's because you were doing all that yelling, Mr. Stealthy-pants.

B: I realize that every Slayer comes with an expiration mark on the package, but I want mine to be a long time from now. Like a Cheeto.

S: Since I agreed to your little proposition, we can do this my way. Wings.
B: What?
S: Spicy buffalo wings. Order me up a plate. I'm feeling peckish.

S: Beneath me. I'll show her. Put her six bloody feet beneath me. Hasn't got a death wish. Bitch won't need one.

G: I'm almost certain you're not, but to be fair, I wasn't listening.

X: I still don't get why we had to come here to get info about a killer snot demon.
G: Because it's a killer snot demon from outer space. //pause// I did not say that.

S: As usual, I'm here to help you, and I... are you naked under there?

S: Ow! Bloody hell! Oh, god! Hey.
R: //pulls out stake// Plastic wood-grain. Looks real doesn't it?

X: Are you talking to me hoping that I'll get so depressed that I'll impale myself on a fork right in front of you?
S: Lovely thought.

S: I know that look. A lot of people never really got Dru, you know?
X; Well, she was insane

Watcher: This statue... its removal from Burma is a criminal offense, and when triggered, it has the power to melt human eyeballs.
G: In that case, I severely underpriced it.

B: There's also a near-consensus about Columbus, you know, until someone asked the Vikings what they were up to in the 1400's and they're, like, discovering this America-shaped continent.

S: I saved you.
B: I was regrouping.
S: You were about to be regrouped into separate piles.

S: Come on in. There's plenty of blood in the fridge.
D: Do you mean, like, real blood?
S: What do you think?
D: Mostly, I think ewww!

A: Oh, it's just so lovely! Oh, I wish it was mine! Oh, like you weren't all thinking the same thing.
G: I'm fairly certain I wasn't. I've got one just like it.

S: "The monks possessed the ability to transform energy... bend reality." Blah, blah, blah. Good lord, Giles writes as dull as he talks, doesn't he?

H: Oh, I'm gonna stake you! I'm coming after you, you bad, evil vampire, and I'm gonna slay you! I'm sneaking up, and I'm gonna stake you so much, with my slaying powers that I have because I'm the Chosen-- eek! Oh, Spike!

D: And the lady just invited you in?
S: Well, I had hubby by the throat, didn't I? Promised her he'd live if she did the invite.
D: And did you... let him live?
S: What do you think?
D: Oh.
S: Too much for you?
D: No, keep going.
S: And I kill 'em, right quick. The whole lot. But... there's someone missing. There's supposed to be this little girl... So I get real quiet, and I hear this tiny noise coming from the coal bin. This little sigh. So I listened harder... it's very, very quiet...
[door slams open]
S: Oh, bloody hell.

B: Yeah, let's hear the story Spike is telling my little sister.
S: Right. Yeah. So, uh, I knew the girl was in the coal bin. And I rip it open, very violently, and haul her out of there. And then I gave her to a good family, in a nice home, where they're never, ever mean to her and didn't lock her in a coal bin.

B: She thinks that... she said that... Spike's in love with me.
X: [laughs]
B: I'm not joking.
X: Oh, I hope not. It's funnier if it's true

Giles into every generation is born one who must run the annual talent less show; you cannot escape your destiny

B: The late night stake-out, the bogus suspects, the flask... is this a date?
S: A... please! A date! You are completely off your bird! I mean-- do you want it to be?

B: Well, I do beat him up a lot. For Spike, that's like third base.

B: If it makes you feel any better, my fun-time-Buffy party night involved watching a robot throw Spike through a window. So, if you want to trade-- No, wait... I wouldn't give that memory up for anything!

B: I can beat up the demons until the cows come home... and then I can beat up the cows

B: So, how does it start?
G: I, uh, jump out of the circle, then I jump back in it. And then I... uh... shake my gourd.
B: Oh, I know this ritual! The ancient shamans were next called upon to do the hokey-pokey and turn themselves around.
G: Go quest.

T: Everyone? Before we jump all over her: People do strange things when someone they love dies. When I lost my mother I did some pretty dumb stuff, like lying to my family and staying out all night.
A: Buffy's boinking Spike.

W: Oh... well, Tara's right. Grief can be powerful... and we shouldn't judge...
T: What, are you kidding? She's nuts!

BB: Angel's lame. His hair grows straight up, and he's bloody stupid.

Gl: What the hell is that? And why is its hair that color?

A: We're just kind of thrown by the you having sex with Spike.
B: The who whatting how with huh?

X: No one is judging you. It's understandable-- Spike is strong and myseterious, and sort of compact, but well-muscled....
B: I am not having sex with Spike! But I'm starting to think that you might be!

Gl: I am a god.
S: The god of what? Bad home perms?
Gl: Shut up! I command you: Shut up!
S: Yeah, o.k. Sorry. But I just had no idea that gods were such prancing lightweights. Mark my words: the Slayer is going to kick your skanky, lopsided ass back to whatever place would take a cheap, whorish, fashion-victim, ex-god like you.

S: Good plan, Spike.

S: 'Cuz Buffy -- the other, not-so-pleasant Buffy -- anything happened to Dawn, it'd destroy her. Couldn't live, her being that much pain. I'd let Glory kill me first. Nearly bloody did.

Bn: Can I just tell you its not my fault?
Dr. Ben's Ex-Boss: Sure. You can also tell me that the dog ate your homework. Or maybe eating Twinkies made you do it. Or maybe, yeah, that there's really a wicked demonic creature living inside you that takes control of your body and forces you to do its bidding.

X: And that's cool too. Whatever you choose, you've got my support. Just think of me as... as your... uh, you know I'm searching for supportive things and I'm coming up all "bras", so something slightly more manly -- think of me as that.

Gl: Last words, Slay-runt?
B: Just one-- Truck.

S: No biggie. Look, the skin's already stopped smoking. You go ahead and play peek-a-boo with Mr. Sunshine all you like. Keeps the ride from getting boring.

T: Horsies!
W: Tara!
G: Weapons?
S: Hello! You're driving one!
W: Don't hit the horsies!
B: We won't! Aim for the horsies.

S: Is everyone here very stoned?

S: Ben. Glory. He's a doctor, she's The Beast. Two entirely separate entities sharing one body. It's like a bloody sitcom. Surely you remember?

B: Have you ever heard the expression: "Biting off more than you can chew?" O.k., um, how about the expression: "Vampire Slayer"?
Vamp: What the hell are you talking about?
B: Wow! Never heard that one? O.k... How about: "Oh, God! My leg! My leg!"


Vamp: Oh God! My leg!
B: See? Now we're communicating.

B: I'm counting on you to protect her.
S: 'Til the end of the world... even if that happens to be tonight.

S: I know you'll never love me. I know that I'm a monster. But you treat me like a man, and that's.... Get your stuff, I'll be here.

B: Remember: The ritual starts, we all die; and I'll kill anyone who comes near Dawn.
S: Well, not exactly the St. Crispin's Day speech, was it?
G: We few, we happy few...
S: ...we band of buggered.

Gl: The Slayer's a robot! Did everybody else know the Slayer was a robot?
B: Glory? You're not the brightest god in the heavens, are you?

B: Dawn, listen to me. Listen: I love you. I will always love you. This is the work that I have to do. Tell Giles I... tell Giles I figured it out, and I'm o.k. Give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now. You have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. Dawn, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live... for me.

BUFFY ANNE SUMMERS
1981 - 2001
BELOVED SISTER
DEVOTED FRIEND
SHE SAVED THE WORLD
A LOT
X: It's all my fault.
G: What makes you say that?
X: I dont know. Statistical probability.

X: You ever think that the world's a giant game of musical chairs, and the music's stopped, and we're the only ones who don't have a chair?

X: Respect the cruller, tame the doughnut!

X: Something weird is going on. Isn't that our school motto?

W: why else would she be acting like B-I-T-C-H?
X: A Bitca

X: Generally, when scary things get scared - not good.

W: What are you doing? Help him!
S: I did.
[vamp goes up in flames]
G: You might have let me in on your plan while he throttled me.
S: Oh, poor Watcher. Did your life pass before your eyes? Cup of tea, cup of tea, almost got shagged, cup of tea?

S: She responded to Buffy-Bot because a robot is predictable. Boring. A perfect teacher's pet. That's all school's are, you know. Just factories, spewing out mindless little automatons. [slight pause] Who go on to be very valuable and productive members of society, and you should go.

BB: Sorry I questioned you, Spike. You know I admire your brain almost as much as your washboard abs.

S: A couple of stakes, holy water, one cross. [picks up cross] Ow! [drops it] Brilliant.

S: I do remember what I said. The promise. To protect her. If I'd have done that, even if I didn't make it, you wouldn't have had to jump. But I want you to know I did save you. Not when it counted, of course, but after that. Every night after that. I'd see it all again, and do something different. Faster, or more clever, you know? Dozens of times, lots of different ways. Every night, I save you.

D: Thank you! See? No biggie. I can totally handle it. [opens book] That's a weird place for a horn.... [slowly closes book] It's not a horn.

S: [peering down stairs] Oh. Did you know this place was flooded?

J: Stop touching my magic bone!

B: Life is stupid.
S: I have a dim memory of that, yeah. And I didn't figure you were here caging my whisky because life was all full of blood and peaches.

B: You play for *kittens*?!?
S: Who's gonna advance me a tiny tabby... get me started? Come on, someone's got to stake me.
B: I'll do it! [he glares] You thought I was just gonna let that lie there?

S: What's wrong love?
B: What's wrong? You were gonna _help_ me! You... you were gonna beat heads, and... and fix my life! You're completely lame! Life sucks! And look at me: StupidBuffy, too dumb for college. And FreakBuffy, too strong for construction work. And my job at The Magic Box? I was bored to tears even _before_ The Hour That Wouldn't End! And the only person I can even _stand_ to be around is a... a neutered vampire who cheats at _kitten poker_!
S: Oh, you saw the cheating, did you?
B: Also, I think you're _drunk_!

B: What happened to Xander?
G: He kept poking me with his hook. I sent him over to charmed objects. With any luck, he'll poke the wrong one and end up in an alternative dimension inhabited by a 50-foot Giles that squishes annoying, teeny pirates.

Vamp: What is your malfunction, man?
S: It's Halloween, you nit. We take the night off. Those are the rules.
Vamp: Me and mine don't follow no stinkin' rules. We're rebels.
S: No, I'm a rebel. You're an idiot. Give the lot of us a bad name.

S: You've just come to pump me for information.
B: What else would I want to pump you for? I really just said that, didn't I?

G: If I want your opinion, Spike, I'll... I'll never want your opinion.

S: You should go back inside. Finish the big group sing, get your kumba-yayas out.
B: I don't want to.
S: The day you suss out what you do want, there'll probably be a parade. Seventy-six bloody trombones.

G: We'll get our memory back and it'll all be right as rain.
S: Oh, listen to Mary Poppins. He's got his crust all stiff and upper with that nancy-boy accent. You Englishmen are always so... Bloody hell. Sodding, blimey, shagging, knickers, bullocks. Oh, god. I'm English.
G: Welcome to the nancy-tribe.
S: You don't suppose you and I... we're not related, are we?

G: Anyway, what did I call you?
S: [looks at jacket label] "Made with care for Randy." Randy Giles? Why not just call me "Horny Giles" or "Desperate-for-a-shag Giles"? I knew there was a reason I hated you.

A: True. But my intuition says that you're not so much the magic guy and more of a paperwork type. Okay, here we go. [opens book at random]
G: But you don't even know...
A: "Bare bare himble gemination."
[rabbit pops into existence]
A: [screams]

B: You're a vampire.
S: I, me, a vampire? No.
B: Check the lumpies and the teeth.
S: [feels fangs]
B: I kill your kind.
S: And I bite yours. So how come I don't want to bite you? And why am I fighting other vampires? I must be a noble vampire. A good guy, on a mission of redemption. I help the helpless. I'm a vampire with a soul.
B: A vampire with a soul? Oh my god, how lame is that?

G: Clearly, that is not a helpful book, darling. Come down and we'll go about fixing this in a sensible fashion.
A: Sensible? You think it's sensible for me to go down into that pit of cotton-top hell, and let them hippety-hop all over my vulnerable flesh?

B: Hi. How've you been?
Am: Rat. You?
B: Dead.
Am: Oh.

B: But when I kissed you, you know I was thinking about Giles, right?
S: You know, I always wondered about you two.
B: What? Oh, gross, Spike! He left, I was depressed, ergo vulnerability and bad kissing decisions.

S: Examine my chip, or else Mr. Fett here is the first to die.

S: [in low and seductive voice] Slayer.
B: Spike?
S: Meet me at the cemetery. Twenty minutes. Come alone.
B: Spike?
S: Bloody hell. [normal voice] Yes, it's me.
B: You're calling me on the phone?

S: Thought you might be up for a little grunt work.
B: What? No. No grunting!
S: I was talking shop, luv, but if you've got other ideas... You, me, cozy little tomb with a view...

B: When did the building fall down?
S: I don't know. Must have been some time between the first time and the, uh...

X: Good Godfrey Cambridge, Spike. Still trying to mack on Buffy? Wake up already. Never gonna happen. Only a complete loser would ever hook up with you. Unless she's a simpleton like Harmony, or a nut-sack like Drusilla--
B: Hey.

B: You know, I know what that looks like, but I swear it's not what it looks like. It's magic weed. It's not mine.
DK: I think I've seen enough.

X: Looks like you had a little trouble upstairs. Mini disaster area.
S: So what, you just come here to criticize my housekeeping?

S: And if we bump into each other, I'll clue her that you're on the lookout.
X: After your... exercises.

S: Get dressed if you can find your clothes, and push off, 'cause if I can't have all of you, I'd rather... hey, that's cheating.

B: He threw me out? He threw me! Did I, like, fall into some backward dimension here? Is this bizarro world?

Wn: What do you mean it's locked? You were supposed to check it!
J: I forgot.
B: I give you my arch-nemesises...ses.

B: We missed the bed again.
S: Lucky for the bed.
B: Is this a new rug.
S: Um, no. Just looks different when you're under it.

S: Well, isn't this usually the part where you kick me in the head and run out, virtue fluttering?
B: That's the plan... as soon as my legs start working.

S: I had a muscle cramp. Buffy was helping.
T: A muscle cramp? In your... pants?
S: What? It's a thing.

B: I was insane to ever think you could just hang out with my friends.
S: And I was insane to think... No, wait. You were right - you're insane.

B: I'm actually trying to move right now.
S: Me, too.
B: Well... this can't be good.

S: So, you ever think about not celebrating your birthday? Just to try it, I mean?

R: You have some weird friends.
X: News from the file marked "duh."

R: I want to explain, I just don't have time. I've been up for 48 hours straight tracking something bad, and now it's come to Sunnydale.
B: My hat has a cow.

X: I hate my uncle. I hate my whole family. That's why I'm marrying you, to start a new family, have children, make them hate us. Then one day, they'll get married, we'll sleep on their couch. It's the circle of life.

Sa: Patrolling with the real live Slayer. You're like Santa Claus or Buddha or something.
B: Fat and jolly?

S: It's nice to watch you be happy. For them, even. I don't see it a lot. You glow.
B: That's because the dress is radioactive.

S: Oh, balls. You didn't say he was a Glarghle Guhl Kashma'nik.
X: 'Cause I can't say Glarba—

A: And now I'm off my guard. Happy. Singing in the shower and doing my sexy dance.
S: Exactly! [pause] I have no dance.

Aw: I can't wait to get my hands on his orbs.

X: Right, 'cause you varnishing the table with Spike -- how could that possibly have hurt?
It may have chafed...

B: Giles, everything's just been so... Xander left Anya at the altar, and Anya's a vengeance demon again. Dawn's a total klepto. Money's been so tight that I've been slinging burgers at the Doublemeat Palace. And... I've been sleeping with Spike.
G: [breaks up laughing]

X: You've been my best friend my whole life. World gonna end... where else would I want to be?
W: Is this the master plan? You're gonna stop me by telling me you love me?
X: Well, I was gonna walk you off a cliff and hand you an anvil, but it seemed kind of cartoony.

X: The first day of kindergarten, you cried because you broke the yellow crayon, and you were too afraid to tell anyone. You've come pretty far. Ending the world, not a terrific notion. But the thing is, yeah, I love you. I love crayon-breaky Willow, and I love scary-veiny Willow.

D: I love to dance, I like music, I'm very into Brittany Spears' early work, before she sold out, so mostly her fingerpainting and macaroni art -- very underrated. Favorite activities include not ever having to do this again...

B: If at first you don't succeed... cheat.

S: Buffy... duck.
B: Duck? There's a duck? [gets hit on head]
S: No visitors today. Terribly busy.

S: I don't fancy sticking my head in that.
B: But if something bites it off, that'd be a clue

X: Sunnydale -- come for the food, stay for the dismemberment.
N: There's good food?

N: Is there anyone here that hasn't slept together?
[Xander and Spike look at each other, look away]

B: Spike, have you completely lost your mind?
S: Well, yes. Where have you been all night?

A: ...Spike's insane in the basement. Xander's there doing construction on the new gym...
W: Wait. Spike's what in the what-ment?
A: Insane. Base.

B: It's a rock cliff.
X: Well, give him a break, Buffy. Maybe it's a vicious, skin-eating rock cliff.
S: There's a cave in it. Look, I'm insane. What's his excuse?

Gnarl: Lock you in, nice white skin

X: Figuring out how to control your magic seems a lot like hammering a nail. Well, hear me out. So, you're hammering, right? If you hold the end of the hammer, you have the power, but no control. It takes, like, two strokes to hit the nail in. Or you could hit your thumb. So you choke up. Control, but no power. You could take, like, ten strokes to knock the nail in. Power, control -- it's a trade off.

W: Have you Googled her yet?
X: Willow, she's 17!
W: It's a search engine.

C: I'd love to ice-skate at Rockefeller Center. And I'd love to see my cousins grow up and see how they turn out, 'cause they're really mean and I think they're gonna be fat.

A: The rapid reproductive rate of our rabbits has given me an idea. I can give the excess out to the townspeople, exchanging them not for goods or services, but for goodwill and the sense of accomplishment that stems from selflessly giving of yourself to others.
O: Sweet Aud! Your logic is insane and happenstance, like that of a troll.

O: Stop! It's Olaf!
Townsman: The troll is doing an Olaf impersonation!
O: I am Olaf!
Townsman: Hit him with fruits and various meats!

B: I loved him more than I will ever love anything in this life, and I put a sword through his heart because I had to.
W: And that all worked out okay.

D'H: Breathtaking. It's like somebody slaughtered an Abercrombie & Fitch catalog.

X: It's the jacket. It's true, something about the big letter on the chest, it makes girls get all swoony and crushy. I saw it all the time in school. And you couldn't just pin any old felt letter to your coat and get play. Not that I tried.

X: No, Spike definitely seems a little more cogent, less bl-bl-bl-bl-bl-bl. I'm just sayin'... once you get back the soul, doesn't that mean you start, like, picking up your own wet towels off the floor?
W: No, but maybe you start to feel really bad about leaving them there.
B: At least he's showering. That's a refreshing and delightful change.

W: Check out the fan club.
X: Daddy like.
B: What is that shirt make of, paint?
W: Buff...
B: Glad Dawnie isn't here to see her precious boyfriend getting all thrusty with some slut-bag hussy... oh.

X: Oh. Oh! No! "Daddy" -- no, I wasn't -- when I was looking, I wasn't-- Oh, god.
W: Right there with ya.

B: Xander, be honest. You didn't, you know, think about slipping that jacket on just a little bit?
X: I refuse to answer that on the grounds that it didn't fit.

W: Hey, Anya. You never told us what your.. "Can't believe you almost--"
A: Almost who now?
W: No, you can't be the only not embarrassed one. What did you do?
A: Oh, I wrote a poem. An epic poem. Comparing him to a daisy, and a tower, and a lake.
Radio: And now the latest on Sunnydale's late-night bandit, who is still at large. A masked thief held up a number of businesses--
[Anya turns off radio]
A: Okay, great. Ice-cream, my treat?

J: Disday ebolve, te tu vhoreh.
A" "It eats you, starting with your bottom."

D: Anchovies, anchovies, you're so delicious, I love you more than all the other fishes.

H: Oh my god!
B: Oh, your god, what?
H: Oh, well, you know, not my god, because I defy him and all of his works.

S: Anya, do be specific and tell a fellow just exactly what you're doing here.
A: Well, Spike... I'm here, obviously... for... um, sex.
S: Uh, beg pardon?
A: You and me. Here and now. Let's go! Let's get it on, you big, bad boy!
S: Wait, wait, Anya, just a minute, this is not exact-- Is that a stake?
A: Yes. Kinky

A: All I'm saying is soulless Spike would have had me upside down and halfway to happy-land by now.
S: I need my pants.

B: I'm looking for this guy. Bleach-blond hair, leather jacket, British accent, kind of... sallow? But in a hot way?
Bouncer: Yeah, yeah, I know the guy. Billy Idol wanna-be?
B: Actually, Billy Idol stole his look from...

Aw: I'd like 12 pork chops, 2 pounds of sausage, 8 quarts of pig's blood, 3 steaks, um, halibut, and uh, some toothpaste...
Butcher: This is a butcher shop, neo. We don't sell toothpaste.
Aw: Um, okay, just the other stuff, then.

S: Meaning, I have come to redefine the words "pain" and "suffering" since I fell in love with you.

S: Apparently I just slaughtered half of Sunnydale, pet. I'm not really worried about being polite any more.

X: Trigger.
A: The horse?

W: Hey, here, the First! ...Bank of Delaware. Sorry.

G: Sorry to barge in. I'm afraid we have a slight apocalypse.

R: Why is that guy tied to a chair?
X: The question you'll soon be asking is why isn't he gagged.

T: I remember. You wore pink.
A: Those were entrails

R: That's hot.
M: So, we're supposed to, like, make out with him or something?
V: Careful, Buffy. Just when you think it's part of the lesson, he'll hurt your arm.

Am: Is it weird? We're mean to each other, and we like each other.
B: Well, it depends. I mean, sometimes that's how people relate. Being mean to each other. Even mortal enemies... Then with the... and that leads to no good. Absolutely no good and much confusion. And then it's over, absolutely, seriously, definitely over, and that's confusing too, the over part-- which it is, over. So, maybe.

M: Where'd you live?
S: What, you mean before? A crypt, actually. But nicer. A bit more... I don't know if "posh" is the right word. But it was more like...
B: Comfy.
K: Excuse me? When did you find it comfy?
B: Moving on.

G: And then, apparently someone told them that the vision quest consists of me driving them to the desert, doing the hokey-pokey until a spooky Rasta mama-slayer arrives and speaks to them in riddles.
B: That's not exactly how I put it.

D: Molly and Rona are fighting over who gets to drive the first leg.
B: Bet you wish you'd renewed that California state driver's license now, huh?
A: Rona won. You should probably let Molly out of the trunk. I never actually realized just how compact Molly really is.

B: We'll hit serious research mode.
S: Try "Behavioral Modification Software Throughout the Ages."
B: Okay. You're right. Not a book thing. It's a phone thing.
S: Who you gonna call? [Buffy looks at him] God, that phrase is never gonna be usable again, is it?

D: I feel him, I feel him.
X: Me too.
An: And me.
G: Good. We all feel each other. Including some of us who don't know each other well enough to take such liberties, thank you. I assume there is a perfectly reasonable and not at all insane explanation, yes?

Army guy: We're to provide you anything you need to help ass-face here. Those were his exact words, ma'am

G: I honestly feel the largest part of it was instinct. Instinct and reflexes. There's a sort of wary watchfulness I've developed over the years. It's like another sense. [Spike tackles Giles, Giles goes thud]

S: [in unison] Hey. You're not the First.
G: [in unison] Hey. You're not in pain.

S: Anya said you were the First. Said you were evil. You're supposed to be all go-through-able.
G: Well, then what the hell did you tackle me for, you burk? What's that supposed to do?
S: I, uh, I didn't think of that.

B: I guess it was instinct. Like you were talking about.
G: I made that up! I knew the Bringer was there because his shoes squeaked.

W: I've Googled till I just can't Google no more.

W: This one's either "I just got lucky, don't call me for a while" or "My date's a demon who's trying to kill me."
K: You don't remember which?
W: It was a long time ago.
D: Well, if we play the percentages...
G: Something's eating Xander's head.
A: Say, that's gratifying.

A: You fought like such a wimpire, what with the lifting and the running.

K: Is getting thrown through the ceiling what he does best?

An: It's wonderful to get lost in a story, isn't it? The adventure and heroics and discovery, don't they just take you away? Come with me now, if you will, gentle viewers. Join me on a new voyage of the mind. A little tale I like to call "Buffy: Slayer of the Vam-pires."

A: For god's sake, Andrew, you've been in here for thirty minutes. What are you doing?
An: Entertaining and educating
. A: Well, why can't you just masturbate like the rest of us?

An: Buffy and Spike have some sort of history. You can feel the heat between them, although technically, as a vampire, he's room temperature.

Amanda: If we don't save the world, then... nothing matters.
K: That's catchy, Amanda. Let's make that our slogan.

B: You stabbed Jonathan to death. What were you trying to do, scratch his back from the front?

G: Have you seen the new library? There's nothing but computers. Not a book to be seen!

S: With all the rubbish people keep sticking in my head, it's a wonder there's any room for my brain.
G: I don't think it takes up that much space, do you?

S: Stop... hitting... me! We're on the same side.
F: Please! You think I'm stupid?
S: Well, yeah.

S: Angel's dull as a table lamp. And we have very different coloring.

S: Not all that tension was about you. Giles was part of a plan to kill me... for Buffy's own good.
F: Well, that makes me feel better about me. Worse about Giles. Kind of shaky about you.

F: No more Starbucks for the wannabes, man. They've been spazzing for, like, hours.

F: I may have said a few things.
S: Like you could drive me at a gallop till my knees buckled. Squeeze me till I popped like warm champagne. That's not the kind of thing a man forgets.
F: Should have known it wasn't Blondie behind the wheel. She'd never throw down like that.
S: Oh, you *have* been away.
F: Don't even tell me little Miss tightly-wound's been getting her naughty on!
S: Not of late.

An: It's an onion, and it's a flower. I don't understand how such a thing is possible.
S: See, the genius of it is, you soak it in ice water for an hour so it holds its shape. Then you deep fry it root-side up for about five minutes.
An: Masterful!
S: Yeah. Tell anyone we had this conversation, I'll bite you.

An: I spy with my little eye something that begins with a "T."
S: Tapestry.
An: Hey, good one. How did you...?
S: Tapestry's the only thing in the whole bloody room

C: So... you found it. Not impressed. 'Cause the question now, girly-girl, is can you pry it from solid rock before I come over there and... (Buffy easily pulls the scythe from the rock) Darn.

X: You know what's even worse? All those stupid "it's all fun and games until someone loses an eye" jokes.

F: Somebody has to lead. Let's vote for Chao-Ahn. It's harder to lead people into a deathtrap if you don't speak English.

S: You did it. Fulfilled your mission. Found the Holy Grail, or the holy hand grenade, or whatever the hell that is.

B: You're a dope.
S: I'm a what?
B: You're a dope. And a bonehead. And you're shirty.
S: Have you gone completely Carrot-top?

S: All I did was hold you and watch you sleep. And it was the best night of my life.

A: I guess I just realized how amazingly screwed up they all are. I mean really, really screwed up, in a monumental fashion. And they have no purpose that unites them so they just drift around, blundering through life until they die... which they... they know is coming, yet every single one of them is surprised when it happens to them. They're incapable of thinking about what they want beyond the moment. They kill each other, which is clearly insane. And yet, here's the thing -- when it's something that really matters, they fight. I mean, they're lame morons for fighting, but they do. They never... never quit. So I guess I will keep fighting, too.
An: That was kind of beautiful. You... you love humans.
A: I do not!
An: Yes you do. You loooooove them.
A: Stop it! I don't love them! And I'll kill you if you tell anybody.

B: He's got a soul now.
Ag: Oh. Well.
B: What
? Ag: That's great. Everyone's got a soul now.
B: He'll make a difference.
Ag: You know, I started it. The whole having a soul. Before it was all the cool new thing.
B: Oh my god. Are you twelve?
Ag: I'm getting the brush-off for Captain Peroxide.

B: What was the highlight of our relationship -- when you broke up with me, or when I killed you?

B: Okay, I'm cookie dough. I'm not done baking. I'm not finished becoming whatever the hell it is I'm gonna turn out to be. I make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing, and... maybe one day I turn around and realize I'm ready. I'm cookies. And then, you know, if I want someone to eat--- or enjoy warm, delicious cookie me, then, that's fine. That'll be then. When I'm done.
Ag: Any thoughts on who might enjoy... do I have to go with the cookie analogy?

S: So, where's tall, dark and forehead?
B: Let me guess -- you can smell him?
S: Yeah, that and I also used my enhanced vampire eyeballs to watch you kissing him.
B: It was... a hello.
S: Most people don't use their tongues to say hello. Or I guess they do, but...

B: Faith still has my room.
S: Well, you're not staying here. You can't buy me off with shiny beads and sweet-talk. You got Angel-breath. I'm not gonna let you just whack me back and forth like a rubber ball. I got my pride, you know.
B: I understand.
S: Clearly you don't, 'cause the whole "having my pride" thing was just a smoke screen.
B: Oh, thank god.

S: I'm drowning in footwear!

G: That puts me over by the door. Demons around the perimeter... Right. I open the door.
An: You go through the door and are confronted by Trogdor the Burninator.v G: Oh, bugger it. Fight.
An: Adios to five hit points. Trogdor has badly wounded you.
G: Well, wait a minute. What about my bag of illusions?
An: Illusions against a Burninator? Silly, silly British man.

B: In every generation, one slayer is born...because a bunch of men who died thousands of years ago made up that rule. They were powerful men. This woman is more powerful than all of them combined.
W: (whimpers)

S: I can feel it, Buffy
B: What?
S: My soul. It's really there. Kind of stings.

S: Gotta move, lamb. I think it's fair to say school's out for bloody summer.

B: I love you.
S: No you don't. But thanks for saying it.

An: She was incredible. She died saving my life.
X: That's my girl. Always doing the stupid thing.

.

.

“and you, you take to long to take a SHIT!"~coyboy bebop

"1st rule of combat: shoot them before the shoot you"~Faye Valentine Cowboy Bebop

"what's up?, what's up?,sweeeettttcakkkeesssss? who's hip?, who's hip?, anywayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy"

"you spilled my egg I needed that egg"~ Spike Spiegel, Cowboy Bebop

"Hey faye I'll make a bet with you: if anyone can find him with that picture I'll pay you the bounty my self"-Spike Spiegel, Cowboy Bebop

"exclusive information huh?, the place is crawling with bounty hunters, and they all know about decker,and I have a hangover the size of neptune"~Spike Spiegel, Cowboy Bebop

"this isn't hide and seek damm it!!"~Spike Spiegal, Cowboy Bebop

"Don't you wanna hangout and waste you life with us?"~Spike Spiegal, Cowboy Bebop

"I think it's time to blow this scene, get everyone stuff together, 3..2..1.. Lets Jam!"~ Cowboy Bebop

“another great moment in the ledgend of Spike…famous bounty hunter, and dog walker…”

See you space samurai”

"See ya space cowboy"

“Where's the guy with the Afro”

"A man cannot live by carbohydrates alone. Complex or otherwise..." -Spike.

-"There once was a tiger stripped cat that died a million deaths, revived and lived a million lives. He was owned by various people he really didn't care for. The cat wasn't afraid to die. Then one day the cat became a stray cat which ment he was free. He met a white female cat and the two of them spent their days together happily...Years past and the female cat grew weak and died of old age. The tiger stripped cat cried a million times, and then he died too, except this time he didn't come back to life." -Spike Speigel(Cowboy Bebop)

Hunger is the best spice-spike

Most things work better when I kick 'em..."

"Don't pull that art of war crap on me,”

*~Once upon a time, in New York City in 1941... at this club open to all comers to play, night after night, club's nam "Minton's Play House" in Harlem, they play jazz sessions competing with each other. Young jazz men with a new sense are gathering. At last they created a new genre itself. They are sick and tired of the conventional fixed style jazz. They're eager to play jazz more freely as they wish then...in 2071 in the universe...The bounty hunters, who are gathering in the spaceship "BEBOP", will play freely without fear of risky things. They must create new dreams and films by breaking traditional styles. The work, which becomes a new genre itself, will be called... "COWBOY BEBOP" ~*

“The real lesson: don't leave anything in the fridge."

"And how long were you in there listening?" - Faye
"Too long, you're story needs editing." – Spike

"I haven't committed any crimes... well, at least not any bad ones." – Faye

"My Onyx is no ordinary steed. She's a good compadre, who eases my mind and plays a decent game of chess." - Andy
"Horses can't play chess!" – Spike

"You said bell peppers and beef." - Spike
"His name is Asimov Solenson. Are you listening to me?!" - Jet"There's no beef in here. So you wouldn't exactly call it 'bell peppers and beef,' would you?" - Spike"Yes, I would." - Jet"Well it's NOT!" – Spike

"... Look this is real mystic and all, but ya got anything to eat?" – Spike

"Radical Edward is a 7-Foot tall, Ex-basketball Player, Hindu, Voodoo, Drag-queen Alien." - Jet

"He called you a cowboy. What are you?" - Old lady
"Just a humble bounty hunter, ma'am." – Spike

"Hey mister, this's the stairway to Heaven. You know that don't ya?" - A frog
"Obnoxious little frog..." – Spike

"Like an Angel from the Underworld or a Devil from haven." – Faye

"And so, they all passed away; every one. It was a short series, but thanks for your support. That was the last episode. May they all rest in peace, amen. And for the next series, we bring you Cowgirl Ed! Ed is the main character." - Edward
"Hey, wait a minute!" - Spike
"What kind of selfish thing is that?" – Faye

“I’ll be waiting by the graves, not in them”-Spike

“and you will shed tears of scarlet”-Vicious

“what ever happens, happens”-Spike

No one can draw a clear line between sane and insane. You move that line as you see fit for yourself. No one else can. You'll understand soon... that the one that's insane is this world. Do you want to come with me? The only ones left will be you and me.

if you play by the rules, nothing ever gets solved!

Angels that are forced from heaven have to become demons.

This is no ordinary star. This is the tear of a warrior. One who has finished his battle somewhere on this planet. A pitiful soul that could not believe in the Great Spirit.

Do not fear Death. Death is always at your side. When you show fear, it will spring at you faster than light. If you do not show fear, it will only gently look over you...

I think I know, I don't think I know, I don't think I think I know, I don't think I think.

"Women are as fickle as the skies of Ganymede."

"Myself 10 years from now — that's so far away it's almost impossible to imagine. Am I alone, or is there a wonderful person next to me? Well, knowing me, I'm sure you're causing all kinds of trouble for lots of different people. Oh, sorry ... I don't mean to ... but that's all right, that's part of life too, isn't it? You're not perfect, but you've got a lot to give, so remember I'll always be cheering you on. And now, a big cheer, from the bottom of my heart! All right! Do your best, do your best, don't lose me! Don't you lose, don't you lose, me me me! In you're time, I'm no longer here, but I am here today, and I'll always be cheering for you, right here. Cheering for you — my only self."

"IT'S IDEAS LIKE THIS THAT GET PEOPLE KILLED!!!!"

.

You are without a doubt the worst pirate I've ever heard of.

Jack Sparrow: But you have heard of me.

Elizabeth Swann: Well, women in London must have learned not to breathe

Jack Sparrow: I'm sorry. It's just... it's such a pretty boat,… ship

Jack Sparrow: that is the second time I’ve had to watch that mansail away with my ship

Mr. Gibbs: It's bad luck to wake a man when he's sleeping!

Jack Sparrow: Fortunately, I know how to counter it; the man who does the waking buys a drink for the man who was sleeping, then the man who was sleeping drinks the drink while listening to a proposition from a man who did the waking.

Jack Sparrow: She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just like she promised. And you get to die for her, just like you promised. So we're all men of our word really... except for Elizabeth, who is in fact, a woman.

Elizabeth Swann: That's it, then? That's the secret? The grand adventure? You spent three days lying on the beach drinking rum.

Jack Sparrow: Welcome to the Caribbean, luv.

Jack Sparrow: Stop! No, not good! What are you doing? Not Good! You're burning all the food, the shade... the RUM!

Elizabeth Swann: Yes, the rum is gone.

Jack Sparrow: Why is the rum gone?!

Elizabeth Swann: One, because rum is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels. Two, that signal is over a thousand feet high. The entire royal navy is out looking for me; do you really think that there is EVEN the slightest chance that they won't see it?!

Jack Sparrow: But why is the rum gone?!

Jack Sparrow: [Imitating Elizabeth] "It must have been terrible for you, Jack. Must have been terrible." Well, it bloody is now!

Jack Sparrow: A wedding? I love weddings! Drinks all around

Jack Sparrow: When you marooned me on that god forsaken spit of land, you forgot one very important thing, mate: I'm Captain Jack Sparrow.

Barbossa:not you. We named the monkey Jack.

Barbossa: So you expect to leave me standing on some beach with nothing but a name and your word it's the one I need and watch you sail away on my ship?

Jack Sparrow: No. I expect to leave you standing on some beach with absolutely no name at all, watching me sail away on my ship and then I'll shout the name back to you. Savvy?

Jack Sparrow: Stop blowing holes in my ship!

Jack Sparrow: Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest... Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly...stupid.

Ragetti: Is it supposed to be doing that?

[pointing to the Black Pearl which is sailing away]

Pintel: They're stealing our ship!

Ragetti: Bloody Pirates!

Jack: puhluley, puhlulehvoos, parleli, parsmi, pasley, parle,parle…..

Jack Sparrow: and I'll buy you the hat! A really BIG one

Jack Sparrow: Elizabeth... It would never have worked between us, darling. I'm sorry. Will... Nice hat.

/Inside Jokes/ "And you, you take to long to take a SHIT!"
Frodo: I am the cheese I am the cheese I am the cheese
Aragorn: Frodo what are u trying to say?
Frodo: I AM THE CHEESE

"HUZZAH"
"she has a point" ~Link


"you huh-huh-huh-hu-hu-huuh-wanna huh-huh-huh-hu-hu-huuhhuh-huh-huh-hu-hu-huuh make huh-huh- huh-hu-hu-huuh someting huh-huh-huh-of huh-huh-huh-hu-hu-huuh it?"

"what’s a gannodorf"

"the bunny of time"

*dances the can can while singing to macho man*

"cow pattied littered field"

"the forest is on fire, the deku tree is on fire, my house is on fire, I'M ON FIRE"

"Zelda: link why is the kokri forest on fire?
link: who cares?"

"stop slashing me with the ray gun"

"were men, we men in tights, tight tights, we roam around the forest looking for fights!"

"*to men playing on the kazoo* SHUT UP YOU BLODDY FOOLS"

"mind the big rocks"

"STOP THE CASTLE, STOP THE CASTLE"

"Parry, parry, thrust, thrust, GOOD!"

"are you suggesting coconuts migrate?"

"nee"

"oh you like himmmm????"

"Do let him get him"

"OH MY *waves hand*

"The light switch, *flicks light switch up* is HAPPY!! the light switch, *flicks it down*, is sad"

"lets put our hands under the hot water heater!!!"

"ARROW EATTER"

"JORDAN FREAKIN TARVER"

"trip-in-a-hole and break your neck"

"thanx"

"black rose revenge!!!!!!!"

"SHIBBY"

"CLOSE THE FREAKING DOOR"

"zoltan"

"Don't kill the animals or you'll burn"

"Mr. Newman have you ever explored the gay world?"

Newman: at the headlands we call going to the bathroom on the trail chasseing a coyote it is way to get in touch with nature.
Dom: so if I wanna get in touch with you do i have to piss on you Jeff?"

"what part of the bull Jeff"

"It fell"

"ouch!" , "we already looked that word up!"

"oh my"

"would it be considered murder if you put someone in a cave with mountain lions?"

"the crow"

"Fervent butt!"

"Laura make me a sandwich!"

“fat man slam"

vv "Horse shadow"

"Downy so my blonde doesn't fade"

"I don't crush thing"

"Every time I eat"

"I don't take calls only rings"

"Mr. Newman I have a question"

"its a gobi its a gobi"

"shhhh!!!! no one move its a bobcat"

"Don't touch it, it will bite you head off"

"wow that’s the first tic or the season" "i don't care just get it off!"

"Circle up"

"Have you ever explored the gay world?"

"jough"(or joe)

"I have dates with Chris and Matt" (and he claims he's not gay)(actually he never said if he was or wasn't)

"Did you know that you don't know"

"So Jeff to get in touch with you would I have to piss on you"

"I’m Jesus NAH HUH”

"Is this a joke?"

“Yes of course you may have my bag Katie"

"Do you want to see what were famous for? - “do you wanna see what I’m famous for?"

"Do you want a free ride on our magic carpet?"

“yuckamunga"

"Now lets see who was invited to the family reunion."

"ha-ha that sucks your in the picture!!" - "um... yeah so are you...” - what!?!?"

"Katie your not going to come kill me in my sleep are you?"

"I have to chase a Fortier"

"I’m pulling a you"

"Do the bats make the containers, or just the products?"

"Guess where these cards are from?" "Tahoe?" (back of cards says Massachusetts)

"Where is my vest"

"OMG! My jacket melted!"

“Wouldn’t it be funny if...” *tries to pick up glove melted to the heater*...”Maya’s gloves were melted too.”

“THE MONKIES”

"fuck a plunder with a jar" "fuck a plunger in a car"(don't ask) (the original sentence was, flagpole, lawn chair.. and 2 other random words but i can't remember them at the moment. but it was really funny!!! ))

Dom: Carolyn where’s the blood?
Carolyn: fuck you Dom…oh wait that’s Rachel’s job.

“Breastfeeding Gerbils”

Me: Okay we have to pick up the cabin!
Carolyn: We can’t its to heavy
Katie and Laura: HAHAHAH
10 mins later
Me: oh HAHAHAHAHAHA I get it.

Are wa Unagi desu ka

*inhales helium*”gimme your lunch money”

“You look like a hoe!”… “I know!”

"Mrs. Fortier your gonna want to practice pronouncing those names"

“Cheese chips”

“The ratio of boys to girls in this class is 72.72%” "okay so whose .72 percent Girl?...jonnnn?"

“Billy get our hands out of the omelet, BILLY!”

“Irving”

“dead puppies”

“Sunday you’ll see my sweetheart and me as we poison pigeons the Pigeons in the park”

“ludens, ludens drug dealing with ludens all day long”

“turn off the conscience”

“deven”

“Wyngermin”

“Katie loves meat”

“Katie loves Legolas”

“if your waiting for the shuttle clap you hands
if your waiting for the shuttle clap you hands
if your body heats decreasing and your hands are freaking freezing

and your waiting for the shuttle clap you hands
if your waiting for the shuttle clap you hands
if your waiting for the shuttle clap you hands
If you wish you wore you uggs and you really want hug
and your waiting for the shuttle clap you hands

just keep swimming, just keep swimming”

v “Legolas' eyes change color; they are blue when he is sad or mad, green when he is happy, and brown when he is horny”

“PASS ME THE MONEY”

“Winifred/Henry”

“yup that about sounds like a good idea, hu hu" *laughs* hahahahahahah that must have been funny as hell”

“DO U NO WUT MARIJUANA IS?” “Do you have any?”

“Buddy’s PMSing”

“spud, spuddy, spudnick”

“stren”

“I hope they used stren”

“fishy condoms”

“Marshal”

“I'm having pot roast and Ari's having Chicken and Dumpling”

“Where is the blue crap”

“floom”

“Where’s my mister”

“PLUSSING”

“I’m a reasonable kind of guy”

“Sebastian are you?….” “yes…”

“BUSH IT”

“Towel boy”

“The monkey”

“TM ice skates”

“Hey those are mine!"

“CHOOOOCCCLATES”

"May I escort you to the jewelry?"

"Get in my way."

“Where's my fuck fuck?”

“We don’t need no water”

“Secret hallway nerd”

“Pumpkin Nuuh”

“Were looking for our pet toy poodle Fifi who ran away”

"His fat ass"-in response to how the chair was broken

“If a heart do lack a hind let him seek out Rosalind".

“Quidditch”

"Your kidding, I thought he was gay, I mean listen to his voice...".

"Where's the baby?"

"I don't do fungsui"

"who makes up these cockamamie rules?"

"But you know what they say, there's nothing like field practice."

"honey I’m good, but I’m not that good."

"LEO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"No offence, but aren't ya supposed to be dead?"

"you mean a fairy tale character came to like and attacked us? Come on!"

"These boots may be made for walking, but their not walking back to you buddy!"

"would you be a lamb and go and get that for me."

"Snow White and the Little People."

"Keep your hands off my pumpkin!"

" uh , I bet she watches PBS!"

"and I wish I were an octopus, so I could put 8 different feet up 8 different asses!"

"okay I have a really good explanation for this... but I left it at home. Bye!"

"well she wanted me to tell you a secret, *kicks him*"

"lets just say the Easter bunny came early this year... And I shot him."

"what are you some kind of foot licker?"

"a tree house? in your dreams Tarzan!"

"put down the grapefruit knife and step away."

"if your happy and you know it clap your hands *clap clap* *drops Soap* ooo *picks it up* if your happy and you know it clap your hands *clap clap* *drops Soap* ooo *picks it up* if your happy and you know it and you really wanna show it if your happy and you know it clap your hands *clap clap*"

"YO METALHEAD!!!!.....BRING IT!"

"HEY YOU.......SHUT UP!

Velma and Daphne were sitting around the stall one afternoon, talking. "I wish I looked more faintingly" Velma said grrrrrrrringly "can you help?" Daphne agreed and they set out for the shopping mall to find Velma a new pregnant lady shirt. First they stopped at the seymor store and tried on a dress made out of squids it was bright red and had fugly sleeves. Velma smiled "I love this dress it makes me look foxy!" Daphne even got Velma to were some indigo makeup on her falangie wieners "now I look as whore-ish as you do Daphne! Thanks for your help" Velma said stingingly

CHRIST ON A CROSS

"if a heart do lack a hind let him seek out Rosalind"