Welcome [Edition Three]
Welcome to the third edition of The Hogwarts Pensieve, where we've had an exciting and fun few months!
We've seen our Headmistress's marriage to the not-really-formidable Potions Master (and we must admit that she looked absolutely stunning!) With her mind preoccupied with pre-wedding jitters, the staff worked on a little something for the two newlyweds, asking for contributions from all the members. A present, one could say, that showed Elfie just how grateful we are to her!
Check out the HE wedding present to see all our contributions!
Apart from the HE wedding of the year (Cill's short-lived marriage to Car Horn came in a close second), it?s been a busy couple of months on your favourite website.
We've appointed eight new prefects, who will hold their position until the end of this term. Well done to:
mcfly_42 (2nd month running)Kitkat
Fated4HP (2nd month running)
pillowloverchick
rip_dogfather
Amberg93
Cookiemonster
Eirbear
We've also had two more sets of awards, voted for by you - congratulations to all the winners!
"Wild Thing" Award - Caroru"Most Original Exclamations" Award - Caroru
"Forever Young" Award - Stealth Wizard
"Sunshine Daisy" Award - OC_Lover and MarieC
"Foot-in-Mouth" Award - Romance Lover
"Drill Sergeant" Award - Fated4HP
"The Voldy" Award - Fated4HP
"Minimal Effort, Max Results" Award - Jennifer Williams
"Twinkletoes" Award - LisaMackay
"Energizer Bunny" Award - Fated4HP
Pixie award: Caroru
Hedwig owl award: Running_swift
Firedragon award: Fated4HP
Pygmy puff award: LisaMackay
Phoenix award: Algebra_Geek5
Unicorn award: Duck the duck
Boggart award: Romance lover
Banshee award: Just Ginny
Boarhound fang award: Just Ginny and Algebra_Geek5
Hippogriff award: LisaMackay
House elf award: Waterlily
Centaur award: Severus snape
Armadillo award: Severus Snape
The duelling tournament is almost at an end, well done to Just Ginny, Fated4HP and WaterLily who have all made it through to the semi-final! Who will you be rooting for?
Elfie's appointed a deputy headmistress, Duck the Duck, and the Lord of the Dance competition is well underway.
Enjoy the edition!
Seedy Underside of Hogwarts Experience Exposed! by Etta
Rita Skeeter reporting live from Hogwarts Experience Forums.
Today as I bravely stole the password for the Professor’s lounge and snuck passed the two sleeping hippos stationed outside of the door, I thought of what boring information I might discover inside of this secret hideout. Would the information given to me by my source be correct or would it be false? Would I be discovered and banned from the forums? These were the risks which your daring reporter took.
Safely inside, I hide behind a large bookcase which appears to be talking to a group of three women, I suddenly realise that this was no ordinary bookcase but in fact the true form of Hogwarts Experience Librarian, Roman. Ducking and diving I slid myself behind a large purple sofa and sat down on the purple hippo printed carpet and flicked out my note pad and quill.
I can hear the conversation flowing steadily amongst this group and as my information on Elfie Dumbledore Snape grows, I cannot help but think what sort of monster would allow these women and men and a bookcase, teach at this school. The door to the lounge opens a slams shut, shaking the walls around it.
"Yoohoo! I'm HOME!" I hear Elfie declare happily as she appears to drop a hundred suitcases on the floor.
"ELFIE!" The group cries in unison, glad of their leader’s return. That is when I hear the disturbing news that is to follow.
"Did you get them? The new students?" Roman asks eagerly as he clops and clanks around the lounge to reach Elfie.
"Of course!" Elfie beams. "All thirty-seven of them!"
"Let me see! Let me see!"
"Be careful Roman - you'll trample the poor dears! It is hard enough getting them all into suitcases and making sure they have enough food and water for the long flight, without having to worry about you crushing them with your books," Elfie declared and that is when the zips on the suitcases began to whiz around and open the contents of the cases.
"AH fresh blood!" Roman declares as groggy moans and groans erupt form the cases.
"Sshh it's okay, and welcome the Forums... Ducky take them down to the main entrance, wipe their memories and prepare them for sorting."
"Okay," Moaned a big yellow duck who slid off the sofa where she had been sat. "But next time, send Swifty!"
"Yes, sure, will do," Roman said.
Just as I sneak a quick peak I can see Ducky leading thirty seven pale looking children out of the door, New Students, that is what Elfie brought back with her. Oh the disgrace and sickness which I felt as I realise my source was correct.
"Speaking of next times," Elfie said slowly. "We need a better reason for my absence, this whole wedding lark and honeymoon can only be done every so often.... I think we should go with a broken computer again for the next one."
"Yes of course," Roman says. "Perhaps we could send Lily and Etta with their torches over to HPFF to kidnap more authors...."
"That may work, but last time they set Jay on fire before doing a rain dance which almost killed HPFF... Perhaps The Two Lisa's would be best to go." Elfie said thinking out loud.
This is when I took my leave, transfiguring into a beetle, I sneak out of the lounge and transform back into my beautiful self. I hurry quickly down the corridors until I fall through an open door and land inside of what appears to be a zoo. I quickly realise that I am not in a zoo but in the Hufflepuff common room.
Standing up off the black and yellow carpeted floor I wander around aimlessly until I am stood outside of what appears to be the Head of House door. I lean closely enough to be able to hear what is being said in side.
"So how did you pass?" Asked a small accented female voice which I believe to be that of Marie, the Hufflepuff head.
"I put a spell on the examiner of course!"
"Oh Etta," Marie moaned and I wonder if they are having a conversation about the IT exam which Etta somehow passed, and all I can do is wait to see if my source is correct on the information which I was given.
"Don’t ‘oh Etta’ me! It’s an easy mistake to make! I mean come on, if you were suffering from information overload, you would naturally take time off, go on a small holiday. Simple mistake and all that." Etta said.
"But Etta it was an IT exam, it was obviously about computers and not people! You really are naturally blonde aren’t you?"
"Hey I resent that! I haven’t been blonde for um, five years! And anyway, what about you and your kittens? Don’t think we don’t know you've been eating them again!" Etta shouted.
"I have not!"
"Yes you have, GOD MARIE! You have one hanging out of your mouth as we speak!"
"OI YOU!" a voice screamed behind me and I turned to see two girls running towards me. I suddenly realise that it is Candy and Streams of Silver, the Hufflepuff prefects.
As quick as I can, I leg it out of the common room and back into the corridors, not daring to look behind me as the two prefects are joined by the other house prefects who are now giving chase. This is Rita Skeeter reporting for you from Hogwarts Experience.
Minor Character Factbox
by Duck the Duck
Desert Island Fics
by Duck the Duck
Welcome to Desert Island Fics, a new section for The Hogwarts Pensieve.
Here, we will feature the five favourite fanfictions of a Hogwarts Experience member, the five fanfictions that they would choose above all others to take to a desert island.
To get things going in this edition, I'll choose my five Desert Island fics. If you'd like to have your five favourite fics featured, PM Duck the Duck with the information.
So, without further ado, here are five of my favourite fanfics.
Duck the Duck's Desert Island Fics
Title: The Seventh Horcrux
Author: Melindaleo
Link: Click!
Rating: Teens
Genres: Action/Adventure, Romance, Drama
Ships: Harry/Ginny, Ron/Hermione
Summary: The hunt for the Horcruxes begins. Harry has to decide who to trust as he moves closer to fulfilling his destiny. Will he be able to find and destroy all the Horcruxes? And at what price? Will he be able to find the strength within himself...?the Power the Dark Lord Knows Not?...in order to succeed in vanquishing Voldemort? And...can he do it and still get the girl? Join Harry and his faithful friends on their quest to finally defeat a Dark Lord.
Why it's one of your desert island fics: Melindaleo is an amazing author, one of the best in the fandom. This story is a work in progress post-HBP Horcrux-hunt fic, and it's wonderfully canon, extremely well written with a fantastic plot. I can't praise Melinda enough; The Seventh Horcrux is her most recent in a long line of amazing fics.
Title: After the End
Author: Arabella & Zsenya
Link: Click!
Rating: Mature
Genres: Romance, Adventure, Drama
Ships: Harry/Ginny, Ron/Hermione
Summary: It's the summer after seventh year, and Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and the rest of the wizarding world must learn to live without fear.
Why it's one of your desert island fics: I first read this fic whilst it was still a work-in-progress, back in 2002-2003, and I still love it. It?s a pre-OotP fic, so there?s a lot of non-canon stuff, such as the fact Sirius is still alive. But this is an amazing, amazing fic. It's mammoth in length and plot, there are so many plots and sub-plots, and the fact that they?re all tied up so well at the end is a credit to the authors. The romance isn?t too big a part of the fic, so don?t let the ships put you off. I can?t recommend this story enough.
Title: This Means War!
Author: Jeconais
Link: Click!
Rating: Mature
Genres: Humour, Romance
Ships: Harry/Ginny
Summary: When the Weasley Boys interfere in Ginny's relationship with Dean, they make the biggest mistake of their lives. The witch decides that revenge is in order, and her first point of call is a new boyfriend - Harry.
Why it's one of your desert island fics: There's only one word for this fic: hilarious! This is one of the funniest fics I?ve ever read; there are so many hilarious moments (the Weasley boys performing the YMCA being but one of them). The story is written in an unusual format: some is normal narrative, and some is in 'm-mail' format (coined by the equally great fic 'Naked Quidditch Match'). M-mail is basically the wizarding version of e-mail. The format works really well though, and there's not much else to say about this fic other than I dare you to find one that's funnier!
Title: Obsessive Lily Disorder
Author: Procrastinator-starting2moro
Link: Click!
Rating: Teens
Genres: Humour, Romance
Ships: Lily/James
Summary: James worships the ground Lily, er, throws him on? Includes James Potter stalking, polyjuice potion, Marauder rambling, and Prongs suicidal acts such as drowning in toilet bowls because Apple Of His Eye Evans hates his guts. Or does she?
Why it's one of your desert island fics: One of the most random fanfictions I've ever read. Also, extremely funny. I can almost guarantee you'll have never read a fic quite like Obsessive Lily Disorder. One moment that sticks in my mind is the Marauders, all polyjuiced to look like James, running around Hogwarts, dressed as girls and calling themselves the 'Peenapul Sisters'. And, oh yes, Snape falls in love with Rhiana Peenapul. Very, very funny.
Title: Priori Incantatem
Author: Fellytone
Link: Click!
Rating: Teens
Genres: Romance
Ships: Lily/James
Summary: Can James Potter, Marauder and troublemaker extraordinaire, ever convince Lily Evans, Prefect and good girl, that they were meant to be?
Why it's one of your desert island fics: One of the best Lily/James fics I've ever read. It starts in their sixth year, and takes us right up to their deaths. I remember the ending being very sad, and the rest of the fic is completely believable as to what could have happened in the times of MWPP.
Crabbe and Goyle's Words of Wisdom: How to Write Good
Readers of the Pensieve will surely be upset to know that this edition of "How to Write Good" is the penultimate.
Yes, my friends, this means that after this issue, there will only be one more opportunity for our esteemed writers Crabbe and Goyle to impart their wisdom-filled words.
As such, enjoy them while they last.
1. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations etc.
2. One word sentences. Eliminate.
3. Parenthesis (however relevant), are unnecessary.
4. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
5. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
Fated4HP: Roving Reporter
The Hogwarts Experience is indeed an experience! An exciting, fresh, fun way for us to come together, form friendships and have a blast! And what better than to get to know the members here? New faces and old. And here is the opportunity to get to know each other! In this issue, for the Hogwarts Pensieve, I've asked the following eight people - two from each house - the following five questions.
1.What house are you in?
2.What's your favourite class?
3.What is your least favourite class?
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site?
And the following people were interviewed, each representing their respective houses.
RAVENCLAW INTERVIEWS
Analia
1.What house are you in?
Ravenclaw
2.What's your favourite class?
History of Magic
3.What is your least favourite class?
Herbology
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
Do I have to be serious?
Serious answer: I have so many amazing people in my house, all friendly and kind.
Not-so-serious answer: It makes people think I'm smart. ^.^
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site? The Games are great, and to a point, I actually enjoy the homework. And, of course, chatting on the HE chat is the greatest.
McFly_42
1.What house are you in?
The best house ever, Ravenclaw!
2.What's your favourite class?
My favourite class...hmm...well, though I like most of them I will have to say Care of Magical Creatures, it is a great class, and I'm not just saying that cos my sister teaches it and she's in the next room ^^. I love doing the riddle of the sphinx and have earned housepoints from that for Ravenclaw. But as I said all the classes are great and really well done.
3.What is your least favourite class?
Now this is hard cos I don't want to offend anyone, but to be honest I don't really like Arithmancy, too many numbers, I'm not really good with numbers. It's great for some people, just not for me.
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
I love Ravenclaw, when I was sorted into Ravenclaw all the Ravenclaws were really nice. Lily is a great head of house, she's so organised and really encouraging. She always makes sure we have a team for Quidditch, people are doing their homework, gives us ideas. And also Herby is great to, for the same reasons. Ok...that's not one reason, but I can't just say one reason why I love Ravenclaw!
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site?
QUIDDITCH! Definitely! I love playing Quidditch, it's great! I've only been the Ravenclaw seeker for two games, the first we won, the second we are still waiting for the result. I can't believe I didn't sign up to Quidditch sooner. I am Ravenclaw seeker and loving it, and I'm quite proud of my last catch, beat you to it! But also, I love how everyone is so great to each other, though there is rivalry between houses it isn't harsh, but friendly. There's so much to do here, I can understand why sometimes newbies get lost, but then that's another great thing about the site, everyone helps everyone else.
GRYFFINDOR INTERVIEWS
Caroru
1.What house are you in?
Gryffindor
2.What's your favourite class?
Well, probably DADA or Muggle Studies..
3.What is your least favourite class?
Arithmancy and Herbology
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
We are brave, friendly and great in any other way. Beside that, we have a great spirit in our house and everyone comes along with everyone, also in the other houses. ^^
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site?
On the site? I'm sort of lazy, so I don't do a lot of homeworks, hehe. But usually I play the games in Games Galore, post in the Hogwarts Community and stuff like that..
Cheery
1.What house are you in?
GRYFFINDOR!!!!!
2.What's your favourite class?
Divination.
3.What is your least favourite class?
Arithmancy.
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
My house has a lot of nice people who will help with anything and they are all really supportive.
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site?
My favourite thing to do on the site is post on games and talk to the newcomers of the Hogwarts Experience.
HUFFLEPUFF INTERVIEWS
Candy
1.What house are you in?
Hufflepuff ^^
2.What's your favourite class?
Well, you know, I'd don't do any assignments anymore, but I would have to say Divination! It seems interesting because it is based on interesting things that uses theories from your perspective. Well, it was like that before ^^.
3.What is your least favourite class?
Meh. I'd have to say Herbology, I'm not an environmental person! To me, plants are boring.
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
Hufflepuff is determined, hard-working, strong, but also they have a soft side, plus we're fun! We're not always a 'determined' house. We also are more things...not some boring house. Our house uses their strength when needed, so we don't waste our pride! Plus, we have the most nicest, funniest, and greatest people in our house! And psssttttt... we're not evil like those sly Slytherins...xD. But I have to be honest, seriously, they have the hottest guys in their house. But so does Hufflepuff! We get it all!
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site?
My most favourite things to do on the H.E site is the Challenges, they're really fun and enjoyable. You get to use your imagination and use your very creative skills! Which I have both, but I'm not good at writing stories. I also like the Games Galore place, I used to play games their aloooootttttttttt..! And that's basically all Very Happy
Cheetahpie
1.What house are you in?
Hufflepuff
2.What's your favourite class?
Care of Magical Creatures. Always a fan of mystical beasts, I am.
3.What is your least favourite class?
History of Magic. I only like History when you have to make an essay or historical fiction about it. Other than that there are too many dates.
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
There are nice people and you start to appreciate the Hufflepuffs in the book more than you normally would.
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site?
Go to the games spot and go to Hogwarts Walks and talk about your favourite ships (Dramione and Harmony)
SLYTHERIN INTERVIEWS
Emelia
1.What house are you in?
Slytherin
2.What's your favourite class?
Defence Against the Dark Arts
3.What is your least favourite class?
History of Magic
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
The fact that everyone has a lot of house pride, and that they all share the uncanny desire to succeed.
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site?
Games, and Role Play!
CharmedGranger
1.What house are you in?
Slytherin of course! The best house in hogwarts!
2.What's your favourite class?
Defence Against the Dark Arts
3.What is your least favourite class?
Charms - but they are all good.
4.What is the one thing that you like most about being in the house you were sorted into?
Being able to look on my 'dark side' mhaahahaahaa and the great people in the house
5.What are your favourite things to do on the H.E. site?
Everything. Meeting new people, the lord of the dance and other event ideas, earning housepoints...
So, these are just eight of the fine members here at the Hogwarts Experience.
A Knut For Your Thoughts
The Oddities of Shipping
by Duck the Duck
Shipping. It’s a word that we all immediately know the meaning of. A word that will be used hundreds of times a day across the Harry Potter fandom, but it’s a word behind which lies a seething world of impassioned arguments, vehement denials and, dare I say it, disillusioned delusion.
Shipping (in the fandom sense of the word – nothing to do with big boats), has been around for a while. Longer than you would think, in fact. Fans of The X Files were using the word in May of 1996, but it wasn’t until Pokémon hit the big time that the word became commonplace amongst fans.
But enough of the boring history lesson, the point of this article is to take a look at the ideas behind shipping in Harry Potter, and just why it’s the area of fandom that gets us more worked up than anything else. You can ask someone if they think Snape is good or bad, and you’ll probably get a yes or no answer, followed by a couple of reasons as to their point of view. But ask someone which ship is better, Harry/Ginny or Harry/Hermione, and you’ll be given a detailed list of reasons, followed by meticulously compiled lists of evidence from the books.
Now, I’m not mocking these people. I’m one of them. Get me into a shipping debate, and I’ll argue for my pairings until the cows come home. So what is it that makes us so passionate about our ships? What makes us like one ship above all others? And why is it always the shipping debates that are the ones which degenerate into slanging matches?
The first question is probably the hardest to answer. In fact, I’m not even sure if it’s got an answer. It’d be like asking why we’re so passionate about Harry Potter as a whole. Of course, there are the simple, easy-way-out answers such as “I think those characters go well together” or “There’s tons of evidence in the books to prove it”, but these only scratch the surface. Without doing a full-blown psychological study into the minds of shippers – and let’s face it, who’s got time to do that? – I think this may become one of life’s many unanswered questions.
And for the second question, well I would think it’s probably more to do with our life experiences than anything else. I’m not going to make generalisations and say that it’s the people who dream of being the Princess rescued by the Prince on his white horse that are the Harry/Ginny shippers, or that it’s the fans of Romeo & Juliet who love the idea of Draco/Ginny. To make such generalisations would be stupid, but I think life experience has to have something to do with it.
And as for the third question, well I think I have the answer for that one – ‘yippee!’, I hear you cry. Really, this last question leads on from the first two. It’s because we feel so strongly about our ships that we sometimes forget about good manners, and start shouting (or typing in CAPS-lock might be more appropriate), rude things to people we would normally be more than civil to. Heck, I’ve even seen some sore-shippers bashing JKR of all people!
And now, now that I’ve come to the end of this article, you’re probably thinking: what has she achieved by writing this? Well, to be honest with you – not a lot. I’m no psychologist, but I am a shipper, and I know that even if JK Rowling comes out and says categorically that one character will never in a million years be with another, the vociferous debates will continue, the Harry/Giant Squid fics will still be written and people will still not believe me when I say it’s going to be OBHWF in the end. But that said…
…Long live shipping, and all it’s little oddities!
Arthur Weasley's Film Review
by Duck the Duck
“Testing, testing!
Is this thing on?
I hope so…well, let’s get this started, shall we? Hello, readers, this is Arthur Weasley, coming to you live from a Muggle cinema of all places!
Now, you might ask what I’m doing here, and you’d be right to! I’m here to do a review of what the Muggles call a ‘film’ for Hogwarts’ very own newspaper, The Pensieve!
If you don’t know what a film is, then you should have taken Muggle Studies! No, only joking…but how to describe it? It’s sort of like a moving photo, except the pictures talk. Hmm, perhaps I’m not making the best job of explaining this to you…Ron, come over here! Tell the dictathingy what a film is!”
“But Dad! I was just about to get some popcorn!”
“Well send Hermione over then!”
“Yes Mr Weasley?”
“Hermione! Explain to my readers exactly what a film is.”
“All right…a film is a form of entertainment that enacts a story by a sequence of images giving the illusion of continuous movement.”
“Err…right, well thank you Hermione, for that…er…insight.”
“No problem Mr Weasley.”
“Well, readers, hopefully that has enlightened you a little bit. Now, we’re here today to see a film called Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Mans Chest, a most peculiar title if ever I heard one.
I think the best thing to do would be to describe everything that I see and do; you’ll get a feel for the real cinema experience. This is the first time I’ve been to the cinema, it’s not something us Wizards get to do very often.
Right, well I’m approaching the snack counter, still approaching…ah, here we are!
I’ll have…the kids deal please.”
“S’for kids, mister.”
“Oh, err, right, well I’ll have a bag of popcorn and a tall diet coke then please.”
“Woolyksweeorsaly?”
“Pardon me?”
“Woolyksweeorsaly?”
“I’m sorry, I can’t understand you around that wad of chewing gum.”
“Woo. Lyk. Swee. Or. Saly?”
“Oh! Sweet please. Well, readers, I’ve just had my first encounter with a snack bar cashier, and I have to say I’m not very impressed. Ahh, here comes my popcorn and drink now. How much will that be, young man?”
“Four-fifty.”
“All right, er, hold on a moment, here’s a ten.”
“Five fifty change.”
“Thanks. Rightio, let’s go watch this film! I’ll just follow Ron and Hermione through this lobby and…oh, oh I say! Just look at that! You won’t believe what I’m seeing now! A moving staircase! The stairs just appear at the bottom, carry you to the top, then disappear again! If that’s not magic…
Well, here I go…getting on the moving staircase…wow! This will be an experience to tell the grandkids!
Oof! Almost tripped getting off the staircase there! Never mind. Now, Hermione is giving our tickets to the attendant, and here we go! Into the cinema!
And it’s certainly bigger than I imagined…there must be at least five hundred seats. Hmm, well I wanted to sit right at the front, but Hermione is leading us to the back.
And now she’s telling me I can’t do this commentary whilst the film is on, because the usher will throw me out for talking! So for now, I’ll watch the film, and get back to you later, readers!”
***
“You won’t believe it, readers, but that was the best experience of my life! The pirates! The ships! The monkey! I am gobsmacked, yet I can’t seem to stop talking! Ron’s giving me funny looks; I think he’s embarrassed by me!
Well I don’t care! My aim when I came here today was to give you a review of the film…but I don’t think I can, other than to say it was the best thing I’ve ever seen, although maybe not quite as good as seeing Ginny marry Harry in 2000 and Ron marry Hermione in 2003!
So I’ll leave you with this final thought, my dear readers: I’ve got a jar of dirt!”