Fictionados BY - LAWS
1) No-bail policy. Once the selection of a book is finalized WE READ IT.
1a) The Life-Is-Too-Short Clause: Books on the Huge Mangy Tome Project list may be rescheduled at the whim of the membership but never removed from the list.
1b) We once bailed on THE LORD OF THE RINGS because some members grew fatigued at the umpteenth rereading.
1c) Books on the Huge Mangy Tome Project reading list may be moved to the Duclet Tones list for listening as audio books.
1d) Books can be removed from the HMTP should information come to light that make the book repugnant to the unanimous membership.
2) Come ready to discuss. If you don’t have an opinion, why are you here?
2a) Answer: For the food of course.
3) Comestible refurbishments shall be proffered at all FICTIONADOS functions.
3a) Rick prefers "combustible."
3b) Any time a Gene Wolfe book is to be discussed the host shall provide Pringles Potato Crisps; in remembrance of the humble beginnings the mighty Gene Wolfe had as an engineer designing the Pringles extrusion machine.
4) Dread Scott Decision: Enunciation of the full name of the “M” book is proscribed unless your Doctor prescribes flagellation.
4a) See the bottom of Doug's Ranked List for the name of the unmentionable “M” book.
4b) This in honor of Jeff Scott who one night decided to abuse his book choice privilege and provided us with endless fodder for ridicule.
4c) It has become our mission in life to never again read a book this bad; although the mere mention of it will evoke a panoply of emotions and memories from the membership. We learned a lot from this experience (see Law No. 6) Its name has been relegated to a mere consonant, during official gatherings, because it was getting far too much undeserved air time.
5) This is a BOOK CLUB, not a quilting bee. Refrain from non-relevant conversation during book discussions.
5a) We all have to put out a great effort just to find a time to meet, don’t waste each other’s time talking about things you could have covered as well over the phone during the month if you really cared. Put topics of interest on the AGENDA.
5b) Revelant topics include anything the entire group wants to talk about. Refrain from pulling individual members out of the discussion to have a private conversation. Do this on your own time.
6) Marx’ Manifesto: The CCCP (Central Committee C-lection Party) decides what the group will read, because they know what is good for you.
6a) Party membership consists only of those who are regular attendees in good standing. We view this club as a mechanism to facilitate our continuing education. Life is too short to waste time reading bad books.
6b) We have learned the hard way that democracy is no way to run a book club. Long-term vision and direction can only determined by the lifers in The Central Committee who have the most at stake in the success of the project.
6c) If you have to ask who is on the committee, you are not one of them. When it is time you will know.
7) Our reading list, The Huge Mangy Tome Project, hereto referred to as the HMTP, shall contain both fiction and non-fiction in no more than a two–to-one ratio.
7 a) Witness the paltry non-fiction content prior to the institution of the HMTP