Purple Flowers

Once there was a boy named John who was 16, who lived a good life. He had a wonderful family, went a to nice school, and even had a crush on the sweetest girl ever. Her name was Leslie.

Anyways, John was walking to school when Leslie came out of her house and started walking also. They were sorta like neighbors. Leslie was wearing a pretty skirt with purple flowers printed on it. John wanted to say something nice so he pointed at her skirt and said
"Those are beautiful purple flowers, they bring out the color of your eyes."
Instead of smiling, Leslie screamed and ran all the way towards school leaving John Puzzled.

At school, John walked into the classroom with everyone staring at him. The teacher brought him into the hall, and wispered
"Leslie said you mentioned something to her about her skirt. What did you say?"
John replied "All I said that the purple flowerts brought out her eyes."
The teacher gasped and scowled
"Go the principals office right now!".

"What did you do?" the principal asked when John had entered the room.
"I complimented Leslie B. on her skirt and she ran away screaming. She told the teacher, I told her what I said and she sent my here!" he said.
"Well what did you say that made Leslie scream?" the principal asked.
"I said purple flowers."
The principal jumped and yelled,
"You are never to step foot in this school again! You are going home!"

At home, John's mom calmly asked why John had been sent home.
"I complimented Leslie, she told the teacher, the teacher sent me to the princiapls office, who sent me home and even expelled me"
"Well what did you say that caused all this?" The mom asked.
"Purple flowers."
The mom shuddered, and said
"You stay in your room young man! Until your father gets home!"
A little later, his father entered the room.
"I hear you caused some trouble at school today."
"No I didn't. I complimented Leslie, she told the teacher, the teacher sent me to the princiapls office, who sent me home and expelled me. When I told mom, she freaked and told me to wait until you got home."
"Well what did you say son?" The father asked.
"Purple flowers." John replied.
His fathers face turned red from anger.
"You, young man, are no son of mine! You will not live here anymore!"
And with that, John was left homeless. He took all of his money he had saved for college and his allowance. He applied to work at a nearby grocery store. The manager pitied him, so he let John stay with him and gave John the job.

On the first day of work, the manager asked if John knew algebra and some calculus so that he could work the cashier. John sadly replied no. Being 16 years old, the manager asked why he had not learned it in High School. John replied,
"I complimented a girl at my school, she told the teacher, the teacher sent me to the princiapls office, who sent me home and expelled me. When I told my mom, she freaked and told me to wait until my father got home. When I told him, he kicked me out the house. I never finished my junior year of high school."
"I'm sorry to hear that. What did you say" the manager asked.
"All I said was purple flowers." John replied. The managers eyes grew big and sternly said
"You are never allowed to step foot in this state again, I am very good friends with the governor." So without an education, John decided to join the marines.

"WHAT IS YOUR NAME!" a lieutenant asked him the first day.
"JOHN LIVLIN SIR!"
"HOW OLD ARE YOU!"
"16 YEARS OLD SIR!"
"16? AREN'T YOU SUPPOSE TO BE IN SCHOOL!"
"NO! I COMPLIMENTED A GIRL IN MY SCHOOL, WHO TOLD THE TEACHER WHO SENT ME TO THE PRINCIAPLS OFFICE WHO EXPELLED ME. MY MOM FREAKED WHEN I TOLD HER, MY FATHER KICKED ME OUT, MY BOSS KICKED ME OUT OF THE STATE OF VERMONT, SO NOW I AM HERE JOINING THE MARINES SIR!"
"WHAT DID YOU SAY THAT DID THIS TO YOU?"
"PURPLE FLOWERS SIR!"
"YOU ARE NEVER, I REAPEAT NEVER ALLOWED TO STEP FOOT IN THIS COUNTRY AGAIN! NOW GET OUT!"

So now John is sleeping on a bench in a park somewhere in Mexico. An old lady somes up to him and says,
"You look exhuasted and weak sonny. Tell me what happened."
"I complimented a girl at my school, she told the teacher, the teacher sent me to the princiapls office, who sent me home and expelled me. When I told my mom, she freaked and told me to wait until my father got home. When I told him, he kicked me out the house. I started working at a gorcery store, when my boss kicked me out the state. I decided to join the marines. The lieutenant kicked me out of the country when I told him. So now I am here." John sadly replied.
"Poor thing, what did you say?" she asked. John hesitated but said
"Purple flowers..."
The lady screamed, ran into the street and got hit by a car. The moral of this story is to look both ways before you cross ths street.

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