This is an introduction of ourselves and how depression effects us.

Setting up a depression awareness project would be almost impossible if we hadnt experienced depression ourselves.
So aswell as giving resources we are also going to give you a little bit of our story and how weve each experienced depression, to let you know abit about ourselves and for you to know that you are really not alone.

Heres my story....., my names leigh, im 25.

I have been suffering with depression since i was at least 12, after suffering sexual abuse from gangs teenagers and some emotional and physical abuse from my parents, and being horribly bullied at school, its really no wonder.
I took my first overdose at 14 on christmas day, o_O, i never made it to hospital, my next overdose was at 15, again i never made it to the hospital, my parents just put me in their bedroom and let me sleep it off for about a week. 
I left home when i was 16, i had my son at 17, this is when my depression really took a turn for the worst.  I began having hallucinations, believing that the devil was watching over me and sending demons to earth to make sure i didnt betray him and tell people what was happening.
I suffered major panic attacks, bouts of self harm, and paranoia.  I couldnt really look after my son either.  I ended up taking anti depressants, anti psychotics and tranquillzers and had to go to a day care unit 3 times a week.  I came through it and started at college, my son went into the nursery there.  We were the for 3 years, i left with qualifications in art and design.
Things seemed to be fine for a while, though i was constantly on a search to be someone else because i was sooo unhappy with myself. 
In 2002 i started group counselling for women who were sexually abused as children, the group wasnt very big, but it was really good to be around other people and to know that i wasnt alone, but it was also very hard work, thinking of my past brought on heavy depression, my self harm was at its worst, i was harming almost every hour and cutting deep in to veins to get the adrenalin rush. I became paranoid again and began suffering panic attacks.
I didnt trust anyone, i was suspicious of everything.
After the sexual abuse group finished, i started one to one counselling, i have a really good counseller who has helped me see alot of things in my life. 
After frequent visits to doctors, psychiatrists, hospital, it was said that i have BPD, Borderline Personality Disorder.
This disorder used to be seen as untreatable, simply because people with this disorder have a very strong resistance to change, their brains almost need rewiring, and obviously this will take along time.
    I'm getting there though, i still suffer depression and also manic episodes, in my depressive states i can't get out of bed, i get paranoid and have panic attacks, my self harm starts to take over again, when im in a manic episode, i feel as though anything is possible, i enrol on about 5 different college course and believe that i can do them all, i don't sleep, my head seems to overload with thoughts, which are known as racing or spiralling thoughts.
Along side all this i can get very agressive, but scared of taking my anger out on others i turn it in on myself, and either cut, punch wall or overdose.
   My life seems to be a constant rollercoaster up and down all the time, twists and turns where you don't expected them.  I truly hope that one day i'll get rid of all my crap and learn to be happy with myself, no more severe depression, no more paranoia, no more panic attacks, just me being able to live a normal life. 
  I know that it's gonna take a long time to find this, but i'm sure i can.
You can keep a checking on how im doing, (if you want) by visiting my journal http://livejournal.com/users/paranoidkittie

 

          Kimberly's Story

To try and make more people feel comfortable about sharing, I will share my illness and disability.

My name is Kimberly, I am 21 years old. For the past 16 years, I have suffered from depression off and on. In 2001 while in college, I was diagnosed with severe and minor depression which means I can go from bad to worse and bad again but never feel actually feel "happy". Since the age of 4, I have had a communication disability known as stuttering. In some way the stuttering has some impact on my depression as well as other events that occurred in my childhood as well as now. In the two years I have been in therapy and working on this disease, I have been through 5 medicine changes, and three therapists. I realize I still have a long way to go on this journey of self discovery and acceptance. I started this project because I feel they are people like me with stories similar or different from mine and just want to know someone out there understands and supports you all the way.  Thanks for reading. if we recieve enough requests, we will open the stories section to anyone who wants to share. :)