June 30th 8:25pm: My sister-in-law, her husband, Aunty-in-law and her husband and two children plus my handsome brother-in-law came to meet me at rojima's house.  I wasn't aware of what was going on at first...I was jet lagging so I was sleeping until half an hour prior to their arrival....here I was sound asleep then suddenly Shanta, my cousin, comes and wakes up saying "Danapu otho, ora ashche....."  Me..."dhuttari, ke ashche je...jaah to..."  Shanta "aare, uthbe tumi, tomake dekhte ashche..ORA..."  Ami omnite boshe gelam...rojima ke chillai jiggesh korlam...thik kina..."eto taratari keno...ami ready naa....hobena..." I closed the door and was trying to absorb what seems inevitable.  So I got dressed...I asked rojima if I had to wear a sari...to my delight, she said no...'cos it was informal.  So they came...chatted a few mins...I was looking at the clock of the other room in fear of the dreaded call ....and there it was...rojima and khalu called me in to the living room...everyone was sitting...ammu was there already...chatting away...The first person I noticed was pushpa...Faisal's cousin that flew in from NJ.   I also noticed Juboraj looking at me very carefully and intensely...I guess he was noticing every detail for his big bro...from my blonde and black hair to my puffy eyes to my bocha nose.....but it was weird...because for a few mins I was a bit confused...The way juboraj was looking at me, for a second I wondered "wait a minute, is that him....why is he looking at me that way....but he looks sooo young...almost childish...God, please tell me thats not him...."  As if Allah (SWT) heard my plea...as we were about to sit on the dining table for snacks..Juboraj, knocked the curtain rod and it fell on him...He wasn't hurt though...but everyone made a joke about it while eating...so khalu said "Juboraj tumi ekhane bosho..."  I smiled to myself....and was a bit relieved!  Afterwards, apa and jashim bhaiya and khala was keep on insisting to take pictures....you know I don't hate taking pictures as along as its group pictures...I hate solo pictures....but they kept insisting...it was so frustrating....and they kept on pushing me to smile...I was in no mood to smile!  They left after dinner!

*--->Because Faisal was in dhaka, and everyone expected him to come to ctg any day...I was stuck in Bondortila, Halishohor... rojima's house...and couldn't even go out anywhere....khalu was kind enough to take us out...we went to the beach at night around nine....it was soooo beautiful...we ate these little piyajis...they were really good...but their size would make anyone laugh...they are just a bit bigger than a pea.

July 3rd 8:20pm:   Faisal came that day in the morning to ctg...and apparantly they already made plans...The time they were given was four in the afternoon...so it was just a afternoon tea event...Rojima spend all day making all these delicacies and I felt really bad putting her through all that.  I got ready around five....I wore this pink shalwar and kurta....the glitters was really bothering me though...everyone from my side of the family arrived on time...and were waiting for them....everyone was a bit upset over the late part...I was annoyed as well...I wanted to sleep becuase I was soo sleepy...my sleeping pattern apparantly have not adjusted then...When I heard my little cousins: Isha Usha, Saima, Sumaiya, Shanta..."eshche eshche ora..." I froze...I felt this weird bubbling in my stomach and wanted desperately to hide somewhere...I wanted to close the door of rojima's room, where I was watching some program on Star Plus...but they wouldn't let me...I asked Shanta..."Is he cute...does he look old...does he have a mustache?? .is he tall..wait how tall...what did he wear...??"  They kept going back and forth...trying to peep through the little serving window of the kitchen, that directly faces the living room...and ran back to give me details...I was getting nervous by the minute...Ammu and rojima came in the room to tell me to be ready any minute...I told ammu..." If I don't think he's cute or if he is like old looking...Im not marrying him.."  Rojima said: " beshi kotha bolbena...age porichoi hok...tarpor dekha jaak"...Bhabi was there..."Bhabi I'm really scared...what happens if I don't go...Can I just not go." ..Bhabi patiently consoled me..."its okay...everyone go through this....I felt like this too..." I guess everyone was seated in the table....I heard someone say "koi dana ke dekhchina je..."  I was like...oh my god...they mentioned my name...what am I going to do??  Then rojima came..."take deep slow breath and come..."  "Rojima...ami parbona je...bhoi lagche..."  "Chup, beshi kotha bole meye..."  bhabi was pushing me from the back and she pulled the orna on my head and I was led to the dining area...everyone was sitting...so I couldn't do the salam rituals I was told over and over about....I was seated next to amma and nanu...on the other side of nanu was Faisal..I didn't get a chance to look at him...not that I wanted to at that moment...I felt nanu looking at me..actually inspecting me from head to toe...I actually felt her eyes move from my head all the way down to my feet...I was soooo nervous...I have this thing...when I get really nervous..my foot shakes...My right foot was shaking...I had to hold it down with my hand....I couldn't even look up...I mean I don't know what was happening to me....I knew myself to be quite independent and straightforward....why am I cowaring like this??  Everyone was feeding me mishti....though I was hungry..I couldn't eat anything....and it was over...I was led to shanta's room with bhabi and apa and jashim bhai and faisal followed...at first I hesitated but bhabi pushed me inside...it was the most uncomfortable moment of my life...I was seated exactly on the opposite side of him ...He was looking directly at me...I knew cuz I felt his gaze...but the stupid thing is that I couldn't even look up...even to that point..I didn't know what he actually looked like...Jashim bhaiya was asking random questions...I was trying my best to stay focused and answer....then they left...bhabi was about to leave...but I stopped her...I wasn't ready to be in a room alone with him...I don't know what happened to me...I was never so embarrassed or shy in front of any one in my life...I guess he was different..in that he was to become my husband...He willingly volunteered to go first...and asked me my name and what school I went to...as if he didn't already know those info...I was about to laugh but I controlled myself...honestly, I felt like I was giving a job interview...but while I was answering...I remember looking directly at him..and that was my first glance at my beloved hubby...Ziat was there the whole time video taping.. until I realized he was going back and forth between me and faisal...I told bhabi to kick him out of the room...so bhabi did "ei video man...tumi ekhan theke jao.." it was so funny!  He asked me about the email...I was glad it was over with and I had things cleared with him...bhabi left...He told me to sit closer..I said I could hear pretty well from where I was sitting...he gave me this weird but sensational smirk...that took my breath away...and in that instant something inside me told me that he was the one...Bhabi asked me "kemon legeche..." "Janina bhabi...apnar kemon legeche.." "amar to bhalo legeche...khub bhalo legeche...kotha bartha khub shundor kore bole.."  " tai?"  "haa to"  "keno tomar bhalo lageni" " naa mane...ekhono bolte parchina thik..."  After dinner (which was bought) before the angti porano...everyone in my family had a little five min meeting with me...they asked me about my thoughts...everyone was there so it was a bit intimidating....I didn't want to say yes right away...because that would seem unusual.  I hesitated a long time...I didn't know if I should...or if I should say that I need more time....I was thinking "what happens if I say I need more time...? do they halt the process...? it was so confusing...."  Then I shrugged off my worries and told ammu "tumi ki chain ta porabe je?" in front of everyone..."haa..porabo jodi tumi bolo.."  I took a fifteen sec. pause..."thik ache poriye dao giye.." everyone said "alhumdulillah"  I hugged borouncle and bursted into tears...he cried holding me...I felt like I already made a transition in my life...a HUGE transition...Amar angti poranor por...Faisal and I spent some time together in shanta's room...I don't quite remember what he said...but I do know he informed me that they scheduled the date of the Nikah...it was to be held on the 9th of July...a week from that day!  They were calling him to leave...I remember him saying "eto taratari jaacche keno...aar ektu thakto..."  Hashi peyechilo...

July 5th 9:00 p.m :  My fordho annoucement...Strictly male event...so baba, chacha, mama era mile esheche about 30-35 people.  At first it was suppose to be 10-12...and the arrangements were done accordingly..then we got the call that it would be more since they had to invite other people...so they had to cook again...everything went well...I had to touch a lot of feet and I received taka notes from all these people who were putting it... actually forcing into my hold...it was rather weird...I didn't like it...everyone afterward asked me how much I got...I gave borouncle five hundred taka...he wanted some cigarettes...the rest I gave some to my mom and some to my cousins for ice-cream...it was fun...around twelve...when everyone finished eating and I was about to leave with rojima...Faisal called on her cell phone...apparantly, the number I gave him on our first meeting...ammu lost the cell phone and he couldn't  get in touch...I guess he tried many times on that number...concluded that I intentionally gave him a wrong number ...and dialed rojima's number...I was a bit embarrassed taking the phone from rojima..she pushed toward the direction of our roof since every room in the house was occupied...so I ran to the roof...I had flutters in my stomach talking to him...He told me he was thinking about me...and asked me if i was doing the same...we spoke for about half an hour because rojima was calling me downstair because I had to leave cuz it was getting rather late....before we hung up...he said "love ya"......I was a bit shocked because I didn't think it would be that easy for him....I thought it would atleast take him a few weeks...or perhaps after we are married...but im glad he did that...it broke all barriers and allowed us to be very frank and open with each other...I said "kochu" and hung up the phone..apparantly he didn't wait for a reply and hung up himself...hehehhehehe!

July 9th 2004:  actual Nikah---> Between the time of our initial meeting and nikah...we spent numerous hours on the phone...if I find someone's cell phone I would immediately ask if I could make a call...and guess who I called?  hehehe...I didn't feel ashamed to call him so many times even though most of the it was me that was calling...I was actually infatuated with him though the time span was not so long...I guess certain things in life is not about time...rather just fate!  I didn't see him until the night of the nikah reception...I heard that he was really sick...I was at the salon, when I guess he was brought to the house by dulabhais to greet my dadu and rest of the family from the mashjid...everyone later, told me how happy they were...and that he was so humble and nice to everyone...all my cousins young and old, said that he was a great catch...and they kept teasing me the whole night...especially shirin and baby apu!  I was having a traumatic time though...you see my nose wasn't pierced...I was never really fond of the idea and hated the fact that now I have to...I pierced my nose two days prior to my nikah...at the salon...that inserted a nose pin with what seemed like a stapler... My nose was raw and red on the day of....yet my female relatives tried to put the "symbolic" nose ring given by the groom's family...they took out the nosepin i had on...and tried to jam the nosering (a crystal stud)...no way in hell that thing was going through...mostly because my nose was puffy and red...I was crying hysterically...no one was listening...and kept on telling me.."aajke eta porte hoi...naa hole omongol hobe..." the situation got so bad that the original pin that I had on wasn't even going in...now i was scared that the piercing will close and I would have to go through that trauma again.....because of this...my nose...though under the layer of heavy makeup done by the salon (in bd its rediculous how much foundation they put on you...my place i went for my nikah was so bad that i went somewhere else for my wedding makeup)...was bright red and made my stubby nose look even more stubbier!  it was so mortifying!!  Being that he's whole family will be there to see me for the first time....but it was so sweet when he sat down next to me on the stage...the first thing he asked was "how is your nose?"  The event was good...but we didn't get to leave together albeit being legally married!

June 10th 2004:  I was dying to see him...so I called him in the afternoon after asr...and asked if he could come to Rojima's house...if he could then i will go to rojima's house somehow...He said that I should get out of doublemooring if he can't come to Rojima's house, he'll think of something...He then mentioned that he wanted to go out...but didn't want to meet the elders so suggested that I meet him in Jashim bhaiya's chamber...which was really a rediculous idea since I can't and won't leave the house by myself on a riksha (I am a scardy cat you can say...I always need an escort)...on the phone we spent an hour trying to figure out how we are going to do this...Then Jashim bhaiya suggested that all four of us...me apa faisal and jashim bhaiya will go out somewhere...so with that much assurance...I started calling Khalu to pick me up from doublemooring (dadu's house)...I told him that if he's too busy, I can take a taxi and come...It was six when Khalu came to pick us up....I thought I was going to be late...I had to pick out what I was going to wear...all that...I got ready in an hour...called faisal at seven and told him that ammu and rojima said that he should pick me up from the house...its not proper otherwise...so he comes...an hour LATE as usual...I guess he was hesitant because it would be first actual visit to a "Shorur bari" hehhehe...he came and sat in the living room...ammu o rojima ke paa dhore salam koreche and they were pretty impressed and happy (godo godo)...amar shamne jete prothome lojja korechilo then shanta said...bhaiya is waiting tumi jacchona keno...so I took a deep breath and went...well I actually just walked past him to the shoe room to get my stiletto shoes...and on the way just smiled at him...ammu was sitting in front of him...so he didn't say anything...So I said.."cholo, emnite onek deri hoye geche..."  Although out of courtesy we had to ask if  Shanta, Ziat and Asif would accompany us...since they are his "shala-shali"...I was hoping that they would tag along....Thanks to Allah al mighty...Asif refused...so Ziat didn't go..and shanta didn't wanted to in the first place...Faisal onek jor korchilo....so I said "Aare cholo to habla gulo jabena...Ami pore eshe golpo korle postabe.."  So we left...free at last...Our taxi was waiting by the gate...once we got on...as I asked him whether we are stopping by at Jashim bhaiya's chamber...he said that...they aren't coming....it was going to be just the two of us...I was soo happy though a little nervous...it was like our FIRST date...But we were legally married...In the taxi, was our first kiss...its was so funny...he was a bit tensed...so I eased up the situation.. The two of us went to Copper Chimney...We talked and talked...and at around eleven thirty they waiter reminded us that they are about to close...We didn't realize how late it was...but Faisal kept on talking and waving away the waiter...but he wouldn't move and stood there for the check....I said "Pay kore daona ora bondho kore debeto tai omon korche..."  Faisal "aare pay kore dile to tomake ekhuni bashai chere diye ashte hobe and everything will be finished..."  I just replied with a smile...he is sooo cute!!  We had a hard time finding a taxi...odike ammura were worrying sick...but finally we hopped onto one and were headed toward bandartila....lots of romancing was done inside the taxi hehehhe and thats why taxi is one of our favorite place to make out in even today.....He dropped me home....ammuderke abar paaye dhore salaam kore (bechara)...bidai niye chole geche....amar khub icche korchilo oke rekhe dite...to spend the night together...But being able to foster such thought in my mind with being afraid or ashamed was sooo coool....hey Im a married woman!!   ---khalu asked me what I ate there, afterwards...though we spent so much time just talking that all we ate was thai soup and drank sprite...but i told khalu that I ate sooo much that I wasn't even hungry for dinner...he jokingly complained that all i brought for them was some mishti pan...heheheh!

June 12th 2004:  He and Jubo came for measurements...for the suits that are going to be tailored...at rojima's house... I was waiting anxiously since 5pm...and they came around 8pm...late as usual!  We spent some "TIME" alone in shanta's room!  It was funny to see that no one minded now that I am in a locked room with a guy! 

** He leaves soon after to dhaka for exams...only to find out that it has been postponed...AGAIN!!!

June 15th 2004:  He hops on the bus to come back to ctg at night (He has high fever)...and everyone rushes the wedding date to be the following friday over the phone...Ammu runs with chotokhalu and his brother to order the furnitures at ashkaddi par...khalu makes an appt to meet my father in law and brother in law to finalize the date!  The following day (June 16th) chotokhalu ammu and ziat went to book the community center...ziat didn't like any other except Golden Touch in Agrabad access road..so it was booked for the wedding...but we didn't find booking for the holud...so we decided to ask our Boronana's family if we could use their first floor that is used as business parking lot for the seven floored building called the "Progressive Tower"...since it was raining and we can't house 200-300 people in our house (Doublemooring)...we had to have the holud at the tower...borouncle wasn't too happy about it...though my mamas were since its in my nanubari pratically!  (June 17th) The next day ammu, mejhomama, ziat and Me..we went invitation card shopping...since it was a saturday hardly any stores were open in Andarkilla Nasirabad!  We settled for this store that had really cute pink cards..(pink is my fav....so I chose it ;o) )  We ordered about 400 cards to be delivered the very next day!  We had to pay extra..since it was impossible to do the job in one day...being it had to be printed both in English and Bengali side by side.  I wasn't even embarrassed to do some of the things myself.....for example...I shopped for all his stuff...from belt to shoes to socks...(w/ exception to the undies of course), I folded the cards with shanta and asif and ziat...sometimes I didn't even feel that it was my wedding that was being planned!   to some extent, things were approved by me...chotomama place the order for the flowers...he showed me the ones he chose and asked if I was okay! Everyone know that I am VERY picky!!   I was bit worried about my sari that they were going to send....I knew that I had no say into it...and have to wear whatever they give....But to my relief the sari they gave me was really nice Phewwwwwwwwww!  

June 21 2004: I spent approximately 14 hours shopping.  I had to buy 20 pieces of sari from Noborupa (GEC mor) for my close female relatives...(chachi, mami, fuppi, khala, dadu etc.)  all had to be of the same design and of different color...so some had to be brought from the warehouse of Noborupa....for the holud!  I was also running around placing the cake order at Sizzle (agrabad),  buying the sari for my holud because I didn't want a plain yellow sari..and having a blouse tailored...picking out fatuahs for my cousins...and shopping for asif...

June 22 2004:  My holud was the BEST!!  Special thanx goes out to Borouncle, Mizan Uncle, Bobby mama...HASAN came!!

June 23 2204: My Wedding reception.  8 hours sitting with a 15 pound sari...my shoulder was hurting badly...my beloved Groom came quite early to everyones surprise ( since they have a history of being late to almost all occasions) at around 10:30... I was already in the car to leave for my new "life" at around 1:30pm  I was soo scared...I didn't know what was going to happen from then on...