whether you know,
whereit is you should go.
things will happen
the world will go round
Please dont cry
just go on and try
you'll live through,
&find happiness too.
for the past couple of months, ive started to see life. i try to stay along the lines of
motto/priority: my family is all i have,&all i need.
over the summer it was all okay up until the start of school.
Today friemuth made a good point: people judge you.
She first said that personality-referring to friendlyness-gets you the good points,
still your clothes tell others who you are. Nonetheless, there are people who dress nice-
as in have good fashion sence-who really are dying on the inside,but noone knows.
THEY ARE SAD BECAUSE THEY HAVE NOONE TO SHARE THEIR EMOTIONS WITH.
i will never forget all of these words.
Now im not saying the make sense,but im not saying they dont either nor that they havent been said before.
its just that they make you think about what ou have in your life&if you fit into the category...
i mean i have friends,. I've had practicallly the same friends for over 3yrs now.
It may not be because i want to have them but it used to give me a sense of comfort.
the thing is i find it incomprehensible why it is i cannot make friends as easily as otheers.
you see, i see myself as guarded..everyone knows that the only way people can hurt you
is if you open up and show your weaknesses... i keep thinking that absolutely anyone
can come into anyones life for a moment and mess it up forever.
that is fone of my biggest fears.
for over sometime i've found it really hard to change improve or be myself.
its been that way since as loong as i can remeber, since i was little.
sometimes i find myself to be surrounded by people and still be alone.
around my friends i've always felt alone. notmyslef. judged.
inow know thats not the way i should feel around people...but i just cant figure
how to meet others who understand anything...no matter where you go ur judged.
i've heard the way people talk about other people. &sometimes i wonder; if they talk about me the same way.
almost everyday i've wondered if i'd be better off just moving. forgeting all here.
i tried it in cty & for once, i was happy amongst people.
my attitude completely shifted, and i saw things diffferenly
as soon as this year started..everything went right back to where i started.
my emo old self. i cant say im okay w/going back to that.
&im gonna fight till i cant anymore to find myself again.....
i really
hate this insecurity, this fear, this this unhappiness.
i am only me. whoever i am. things WILL change.
for all i've got left is me myself and I
i swear you will never seeme cry.
two weeks later
i've managed to make good of what once rotted.
my song will tell you how it started:
you taught me to never lie
you taught me to never cry,
but now that you're not here..
what am i supposed to do?
wihtout youuuu., i 've fallen to pieces
i now know what this is..
ibroke down and cried,
just 'cause lied.,
then you came back and told me
"wipe you pretty little face and come backnow,
cause im nothing since you left.."
well gusess what, its was
your "pretty little" lie that made me cry
{to be continued...}
