I KNOW YOU.

Finally you’re home. I’ve been waiting for about five hours, but I don’t know if I’m actually that happy to see you. You burst in, mumbling something I can’t understand and make your way to the kitchen. I hope everything’s alright. “?” I ask. I’m trying to be nice here. “What?!” you snap at me. So, I guess nice is not what you need on the moment. “You alright?” I ask. I hear you sigh from the kitchen, as I still am in the living room, watching TV. There’s no need for me to walk all the way over to you. You’ll always find your way to me in the end. I was right. There you are.

“Do you think I’m alright?! Do I look anything close to alright?!” you yell. It looks like you’re freaking out about something big. Well, forget me saying that. The last time I saw you like this was when you broke a bloody nail. I was worried that the world was going to explode and then you told me in tears that your nail broke. Nice.

“No not really” I answer to your question. Oh yea, the tears are coming. I see you welling up. It’s so cute when you are first trying to fight the tears back, looking up and sighing but I know that it never really works. I think you know too. “What’s wrong?” I ask, now putting my plate down on the table. You’re just standing there, still with your coat on, unzipped though, and your purse in your hand. Your scarf, which my mum made for you by the way, is just hanging around your neck, almost touching the floor. You look like a tramp really. Sorry for that. Still you haven’t answered my question. Meaning, you don’t want to tell me but I have to pull it all out of you. There’s about 2 feet in between us and I open my arms. Without any thinking you just rush over to me and push yourself against me, letting me hug you.

“People at work have been pushing me around… and-” you stop to sniff your nose. “And that totally pissed me off… and then-” again you sniff. “Then I went to the shop… and the dress I want, was too small for meee” and yes, now you are crying. “And when I asked for another size… they said they didn’t have any bigger… and now I feel fat” you’re sobbing into my chest. Gosh, I just changed my shirt. Why do girls always have these stupid issues? “No… Nonono… you are not fat! Not even anything close to fat!” I start. Hey, I’ve got to do something to make you feel good again! So, you have an ass? I’m serious, guys like girls with asses better than girls who are flat back there. Only, you don’t seem to know that. “Then why did the lady in the shop say that I am?” oh gosh, you put on the baby voice. When you do that everybody feels the urge to protect you. You know it.

I’m thinking I might let you go and make you dinner. Should I? You stopped sobbing but you don’t show anything about pulling back. I’m the one holding you… “I’m starving” you say, now with your normal voice. The hugging worked! You happy again. I pull back. Oh, you might not want to look into a mirror. There’s black make-up all over your cheeks. Oh, and my shirt.

“Sorry about your shirt…” you say. “I know you just changed it” how do you know this? “It’s alright” I say like I’m fine with it. I’m not, but when I see your cute little face I can’t say anything else. I’m about to leave the room to make you dinner when I hear you say my name. “…?” and the baby voice is back. I turn around and see you, standing next to the table holding my plate. “You ate my Hawaii pizza?” oh yea, fuck shit. That was your pizza! You sob once, trying to hold it back again. I have no idea what to say, all I do is think about what to tell you. “Do you know that this Hawaii pizza was probably the only thing that could’ve made my day…” and the baby voice changed into the high voice. You’re just staring at me, making me feel bad. Again, you sob only once, looking up, trying to hold the tears back, and congratulations, I think its working. I’m just standing here… don’t know what to say. Obviously it shows because you sigh. “Look at me… I’m being such a bitch here. Such a bitch!” you say and put the plate back on the table. “I’m sorry… I just had a real bad day and you can’t help it and-” you sigh. “It’s alright” I say again, like I’m fine with it. This time I’m not lying.

How do I do it? I am the best ever in cheering people up. Well, in cheering you up. I made you a nice meal and now we’re both watching TV. You’re sitting on the floor, leaning against the couch where I’m sitting on. “Can you please get my braid out and put two new ones in?” you ask me. I know you like me playing with your hair. I sit up a bit and put my legs on the floor, one on either side of you. We’re watching the news. Pretty boring. But you have to for your job. “Don’t pull!” you suddenly say with her mouth full with food. Didn’t sound too charming. “I’m sorry” I say. God, could I want you more? My hands are running through your soft hair. It’s a bit curly from the braid. It looks pretty. You throw your head back and look at me. “Hi” you say and smile. I smile back. “Sit still, I’m trying to do your hair here!” I say in a gayish voice. You start laughing and put your head back and continue watching TV and eating your meal. God, I love your laugh. You know how little girls giggle? Well, when you laugh it sounds like that. It’s cute. “There, done” I say when I put two braids in your hair. “Thanks hun” you say again with food in your mouth. Though all the food and the grose sounds you make while eating I still want to kiss you! I’ve tasted those lips once, a long time ago and I seriously can’t wait for the next time we have another drunk night. It was actually funny. How it happened I mean. We were talking about each others boy and girl friends, when you suddenly said ‘I can make you want to kiss me’. That lead to a whole discussion, and… well, you won. We ended up kissing in the hallway. When you pulled back you walked to the living room. Seconds after I followed and found you asleep on the couch. Don’t know how you did that… “Yo, retard?!” you yell, waving in front of my eyes. Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention. “I was asking if you wanted to go out tonight…” you say. I think you might have read my mind there! “Oh, yea. Sure.” I answer. “Great!” you say exited and get up. “I’m gonna take a shower and you need to work on your hair there!” you say, pointing at my head and you leave. What’s wrong with my hair? Ah well, if you say that it needs work, I guess it needs work then.

“Everybody is gonna be jealous!” you say exited but softly. We’re walking down the street, looking for any nice bars. “Why is everybody gonna be jealous?” I ask smiling. You’re already acting like you’re drunk, but you’re not. It’s funny. “Because I’m with you tonight mister” you say and we link arms. “Ah yes, you’re so lucky” I say sarcastic and you laugh. The same giggle you always give me. “…” you start. Yes my darling? “Ye?” You look at me, I look back. “I can make you want to kiss me…” you look at me, and anybody can tell that you’re fucking flirting with me. You’re not even drunk! You let my arm go and run a few steps. I stop, watching you run. You spin a few times, your arms flying and you look up. I’m just watching you with a smile on my face. Suddenly you stop and look through the window of a bar that you are standing outside of. “! Let’s go in here!” you say and already opened the door. I can’t do anything else but laugh and follow you.

“You dared him again?” asks you when I told him what you just told me in the street. You obviously haven’t been paying attention and raise your eyebrows. “What you mean?” you ask innocent. laughs. We’re all sitting at the bar with some drinks. Well, you and I are sitting, and is standing, talking to me. You are just looking around… you always do that. Jut randomly watching people. “You dared again!” 's still laughing. “I dared to do what?” you ask. I think you know what he means but you are just trying to play the innocent girl. “You know what I’m talking about” smiles. See, I’m not the only one thinking that. You nod and smile. “You really know how to stay friends with ” says taps you on your leg. You shrug. “It’s true” you say and look at me. I raise my eyebrows. “You think you can actually make me want to kiss you?” I say, knowing that you can. Hey, I’m a man, I have to protend to be stronger than you! You nod again. laughs again. “You know she’s right!” says. Man, I’m hanging out with him too much! He keeps thinking the same stuff as me… only he actually says it! Not funny. “You’re saying that I can’t?” you ask me, taking another sip of your drink. Suddenly I want you to be the girl I was comforting a couple of hours ago. When you had that look in your eyes, making other people want to hug you and protect you and take care of you. Girls always have some different sides. An emotional one, a slutty one and they also have this girly girl side… don’t really like that one. I think nail polish smells. And there’s also the shy side, the one-of-the-guys side… sometimes they are mature and sometimes they are like a 5 year old. Guys don’t have that… we are ourselves. End of. No different sides. “I’m saying that you can’t” I say, answering your question. I see you laugh. You and share a look. See, that's the bad thing about having a best friend who's also best friends with your female best friend. Confusing. "We'll see about that" you stand up. Gosh, I want to get myself out of this situation, but I can't. There's no way out.

Okay, you did it again. This morning I woke up next to you. Not fully naked, but I know that there's been some action. As always, you're sleeping till noon. Gives me a change to think about it all. I'm just gonna tell myself that nothing has happened, and also protend like nothing has happened. That would be the best right? You'd probably do the exact same thing. I know you. You'd be all like, happy and stuff but you would never bring this up. I know you very good. It's about 2pm now and I'm watching a film on the couch, it's Sunday anyways so I have nothing to do. I can hear you walking down the stairs. I take a deep breath and you enter. "Good afternoon" I smile at you while putting my glass of coke down on the table. You smile weakly as you're just up and walk over to me. I sit back and you sit down next to me. "What you watching?" you ask. I giggle inside as I see your garfield pjs. You are so immature, just like a little kid. Only then I bit bigger and more sexy. "Love Actually" I say a bit imbarrest. It's such a chickflick and you catch me watching it. But, you don't seem to care as you just shrug and look around the room. "Last night was fun" you suddenly say. I look at you, you're smiling at me. It's not a normal friendly smile, it's sort of flirty. I don't really know if I've got to be flirty back, so I just smile back. "I had to make my way through your clothes to get downstairs" you laugh. See, the morning face is my favorite face of you. You look still a bit sleepy, there's no make-up, your hair is messed up and you're in your pjs. Cute. I don't say anything, just focus on the film. Well, I protend to be watching it now, I'm too aware of you sitting next to me now. You stand up and leave. Probably gonna make breakfast... or lunch. "!" you yell from the kitchen. I did nothing wrong! Gosh, women! "What?" I ask in the nicest way possible. "Could you come here for a second?" jesus, you sound like my mum! I sigh, get up and walk to the kitchen. "What's wrong?" I ask and shrug kind of irritated. Instead of a whole discussion about messes, cleaning up and moving stuff without the other knowing, you run over to me and kiss me. I'm flabber gasted and just because I don't know what else to do, I kiss back. After a while you pull back. "So you did enjoy last night?" you ask confused. I give you a look. What in the world made you think that I didn't enjoy it? Girl, open your eyes please! For the last two years I've had a major crush on you! "Kinda did" I say. Why can I never say what's actually going on in my head? "Good" you say, smile and give me a quick kiss on the lips before leaving. I look at your butt. "Don't look at me walking away" you yell when you're in the hallway. I smile. I know you're smiling aswell. So... I guess I don't know you as well as I thought... I think I'm gonna protend like something did happen. Who knows what happens next...

The End.