Fistful of Traveller's Cheques
Carlos: You start the row.
Miguel: I went first last time.
Carlos: No you didn't.
Miguel: Did.
Carlos: Didn't
Migueal: Did.
Carlos: Didn't.
Miguel: Did.
Carlos: Did... not...
Miguel: (advancing, hand on gun) Are you calling me a liar?
Carlos: Er... have we started yet?
Miguel: (lapsing into West Country accent) Of course i have, you great tosser!
Carlos: All right... start again...
The Supergrass
Harvey: (prompting from the back seat) Tell him we're going on holiday
Dennis: Hello, we're going on holiday.
Policeman: Oh yeah - where's that then, France?
Dennis: No, no, West Country - you know, cream teas, surfboarding, all that.
Policeman: No, you see the reason I said France was, I thought you might be getting in some practice, you know, for driving on the wrong side of the road (Dennis laughs) Name?
Dennis: Dennis Carter
Policeman: Dennis Carter. I'm going to show you something Dennis. (Halts the oncoming traffic and stands in the middle of the road) What's that, Dennis?
Harvey: (prompting quietly) White line.
Dennis: White line.
Policeman: A white line. Yes. Now, in France, going that way, they would drive on this side of the road - the right side. But, in Angleterre, Monsieur Dennis, we still drive on the...?
Harvey: Left.
Dennis: Left.
Policeman: The left! (jumps across the whit line) Correct! But you were driving on this (jumps back across the white line) side of the road when you should have been driving on (jumps again) this side of the road. Comprenez-vous, Monsieur Dennis?
Dennis: You must be the funniest copper in the world!
Policeman: What did you just say?
Harvey: He say's he's very sorry, officer, and he'll never do it again.
Policeman: Documents?
Harvey: (prompting) In the post.
Dennis: In the post.
Policeman: Can't you speak for yourself?
Harvey: Yes.
Dennis: Yes.
)
