The Comfort Handbook



We've all experienced (or will experience) the feeling of being completely overwhelmed. When others aren't there to help us out of our misery, what can we do to help ourselves?  I've created this website to help you get started.  Calming scriptures, soothing music, books, workbooks, and helplines to help you through this difficult time. Choose what works best for you from the topics in the left margin. 

We are all in need of comfort from time to time. Bad stuff happens. We suffer the loss of a loved one (through death or divorce); we have an unexpected illness that turns out to be more serious than we anticipated; we have problems with our children, we get into financial difficulty; we move, we get depressed.

When things go wrong in our lives, we often find ourselves asking:

1. Why me?

2. Why do bad things happen to good people?

3. What did I do to deserve this?

The answers to such questions are very simple:

1. Why not you?

2. Bad things happen to everybody 

3. You were born (adversity comes with the territory).

Adversity is part and parcel of life. To be alive is to grow; to grow, we must suffer pain. The old saying, “The difficulties of life are intended to make us better-not bitter” is true. It is through adversity that we learn wisdom, understanding, compassion, sympathy empathy, and gain strength. In the things that we suffer, we learn what we are made of. As we endure and cope, we gain character and emotional strength. Tragedy, pain, and sorrow come into our lives. We usually can’t change it, but there is one thing we can change and that is our attitude toward it.

According to John C. Maxwell, a popular author of inspirational books, “God chooses what we go through; we choose how we go through it.” Remember this, when you look up and see a dark and stormy sky, it is only temporary; things will not always be as they are now. Above the clouds is a beautiful blue sky and the gloom will eventually dissipate. It may take days, weeks, or months, but sooner or later the sun will shine again. If you find yourself in a spot where the sun never shines, you need to move.

I’ve found understanding in this profound statement by Spencer W. Kimball: “Should we be protected always from hardship, pain, suffering, sacrifice or labor? Should the Lord protect the righteous? Should He immediately punish the wicked? If growth comes from fun and ease, and aimless irresponsibility, then why should we ever exert ourselves to work or learn or overcome? Is there not wisdom in His giving us trials that we might rise above them, responsibilities, that we might achieve, work to harden our muscles, sorrows to try our souls?”

God has not promised to remove the difficulties, but to be with us through them.


When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
--Isaiah 43:2


He is with us. But we will pass through the waters; we will walk through the fire.


How do we get through these difficult times? A soak in a bubble bath and a good book might work for one night – but how do we get through the long haul? I’ve tried to compile an assortment of ideas to comfort one’s soul, not just for one night, but on a daily basis.

You may just want to be left alone - but don't push people away.  You need them in order to work through this difficult time. There are three steps to getting through crisis:

1.  You need to talk about what happened.

2.  You need to talk about how you feel about what happened.

3.  You need to talk about what you plan to do about it.

As you can see, in order for you to get through this, you need someone to talk to.  People want to help you - let them.  Isolating yourself only prolongs your misery.

Attend as many social functions as you can handle. It is okay to have a good time and smile - even laugh. Laughter is good for the soul. 

As you read this book, you will discover that doing things for others is one of the best ways to lift your own spirit.  When we are grieving, there are usually others who are also grieving.  As you talk about your problems, don't forget to ask them what is going on their life and if there is anything you can do for them.

I have included recipes for food to bring to neighbors or friends who may need your support.


Don't forget to put this site in your favorites - you'll want to come back.


To find out how to help others (what to say and do and what NOT to say and do in every situation) go to my website:




Note:  If after exploring this website, you have any ideas that may comfort others,

contact me at