NUGGETS OF WISDOM
FOUND ONLY AT
BIGWOODS
ANOTHER GREAT BIGWOODS QUOTE- "HEY PORKCHOP...THESE FRESHLY GRADED ROADS ARE GREAT..THEY ARE SO SMOOTH AND IT'S SO MUCH EASIER TO CUT DOUGHNUTS ON THEM NOW...THANKS A BUNCH MAN REALLY!!!"
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"YOU NEED HOW MUCH MONEY? MAN I DIDN"T KNOW YOU HAD TO PAY TO GET IN THIS PLACE"
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"PORKCHOP I KNOW THIS PIT IS CLOSED BUT I WAS GOING REAL SLOW"
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"IT COST HOW MUCH? MAN I HAVE 5 FOURWHEELERS AND 10 PEOPLE AND WE ARE STAYING THE WHOLE WEEKEND...CUT US SOME SLACK MAN..THAT'S ALOT OF MONEY!"
FYI...$40,000 WORTH OF ATV'S AND A $45,000 TRUCK AND A $5,000 TRAILER
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"HEY MAN..DOES THIS ROAD HERE RUN BOTH WAYS?"
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"HEY MAN..WE ARE ONLY GONNA RIDE FOR A FEW HOURS...DO WE STILL PAY FULL PRICE?"
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"HEY MAN ...PORKCHOP LET'S ME IN FOR FREE USUALLY ."
FYI...THEY WERE TELLING THIS..TO ME(PORKCHOP)
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"YEAH I HAVE A PORTABLE WELDER..I WAS WONDERING IF YOU WOULD LET ME IN FOR FREE FOR THE WEEKEND IF I DID SOME ONSITE WELDING FOR YOU?"
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"THE CONWAY BYPASS IS JUST HORRIBLE..CAN'T YOU GUYS FIX IT OR SOMETHING?"
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"HEY THERE IS A GUY DOWN THERE WITH HIS FOURWHEELER IN THE DITCH UPSIDE DOWN IN THE WATER ON TOP OF HIM..I THINK HE MIGHT NEED SOME HELP"
FYI...HE DID!!
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"HEY WHAT DO YOU GUYS USE TO GET FOURWHEELERS THAT ARE STUCK OUT AROUND HERE?"
FYI..OTHER FOURWHEELERS
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"IS IT GONNA RAIN THERE THIS WEEKEND?
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"IM HERE TO MEET MY SON..HE DRIVES A GRAY DODGE TRUCK"
FYI..AUGUST 15TH COLT FORD(2000 PLUS PEOPLE)
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"YOU MET MY MOM?"
FYI..AUGUST 16TH COLT FORD 03:30AM I FIND A GRAY DODGE IN THE DITCH ON 5 MILE RD.
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"YEAH WE WANNA BUY A FAMILY MEMBERSHIP. THAT WAY ME AND MY BOYFRIEND AND HIS DAUGHTER AND HER UNCLE CAN ALL GET IN FOR FREE ALL YEAR LONG"
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"HEY PORKCHOP..THIS IS MY FRIEND..HE DOESN'T GET OUT MUCH"
FYI..04:45PM FRIDAY AFTERNOON
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"HEY PORKCHOP MAN I AM SO SORRY...HE NEVER ACTS LIKE THIS..HE JUST DOESN'T GET OUT OF THE HOUSE MUCH"
FYI...05:50PM SAME FRIDAY AFTERNOON
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"HEY PORKCHOP MAN I AM SORRY..I'M NEVER BRINGING THAT GUY BACK WITH ME AGAIN I PROMISE!!"
FYI... 07:15 SAME FRIDAY AFTERNOON
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"HEY MAN DO YOU GUYS CLOSE FOR HUNTING SEASON?"
FYI...NO
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"MAN I GOT A BRUTE 750...IT DON'T GET STUCK!"
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"MAN I GOT A HONDA..IT WILL GO THROUGH ANYTHING!"
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"I GOT ME A POLARIS MAN...I DON'T NEED NO SNORKELS!"
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"MAN I HAVE BEEN RIDING IN THE GREEN SWAMP FOR YEARS AND I DON"T NEED NO SNORKELS!"
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"HEY PORKCHOP I KNOW MY KIDS DON'T HAVE HELMETS BUT I PROMISE I WILL BE REAL CAREFUL. I'M GONNA STRAP THEM IN THE CAR SEAT THAT I HAVE ATTACHED TO THE BACK RACK,,,THEY WILL BE FINE!"
REALLY?
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"HEY WHAT TIME DO YOU GUYS CLOSE? I NEED TO KNOW WHEN TO COME PICK MY KIDS UP."
FYI... WE ARE NOT BABYSITTERS
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"HEY PORKCHOP..WE WANT TO RESERVE OUR FAVORITE CAMSITE FOR THE COLT FORD CONCERT...BUT WE WON'T BE THERE TILL LATE SATURDAY AFTERNOON"
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WHEN STOPPED AND TOLD TO RIDE THE ATV WITH LEGS WRAPPED AROUND THE GUY IN FRONT OR GET OFF AND WALK.
"MAN I AIN'T GAY...I'LL WALK"
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WHEN TOLD TO "TURN YOUR LIGHTS ON AT 12:30AM
"MAN WE ARE JUST GOING RIGHT THERE!"
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WHEN TOLD TO STOP POWER BRAKING ON THE ROAD AND DIGGING HUGE HOLES
"MAN I WAS JUST HAVING SOME FUN,YOU NEED TO LIGHTEN UP"
FYI...WRONG ANSWER
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WHEN TOLD TO STOP PULLING A SHEET OF PLYWOOD BEHIND A ATV BY A ROPE WITH SOMEONE TRYING TO RIDE THE PEICE OF WOOD.
"COME ON MAN LET US TRY IT...I'M SURE THE ROPE WILL BREAK BEFORE ANYONE GETS HURT"
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WHEN STOPPED ON THE TRACK RIDING DOUBLE WITH NO HELMETS
"MAN WE WERE JUST HAVING SOME FUN..WE DIDN'T SEE THE SIGNS"
FYI...I NEVER MENTIONED THE SIGNS
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"WHERE IS THE MUD?"
