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Self-titled Studio Release

Rusted Spoke

 

life is a rusted spoke

this ain’t no joke

cut me like the rusty wind

ouch, give me tetanus

thank God i got my shot last year

life is a rusty spoke

remember when we used to ride the bikes

hey you, i’m gonna clothes pin a baseball card to ya

don’t cut me

don’t cut me

don’t cut me

ouch, that hurts

 

 

Bumper Car Blues

 

i paid five dollars to drive around in a circle in a little bumper car

but then the little punk kid that’s five years old and’s a spoiled brat came over and

hit me in the back and ouch, it hurt and the sparks fell from the ceiling

and then it was over

used all my five dollars to ride a bumper car

i feel so bad cause i spent all my money on you

now i’m broke and this ain’t no joke

i got the bumper car, i got the bumper car blues

 

 

Stuck N Traffic

  

move out of my way

get off at that exit

that’s not where i’m going

and that’s not where you’re going anymore

i had to run you off the road

road dog, road dog, road dog, road dog, road dog

i’m stuck in traffic again

late for work again

 

 

Scent Of Love

 

oh, i can still remember

oh, it was seven years ago last December

oh, it was the first time we met, i can’t forget

oh, our first kiss and the scent of your lips

oh, i can’t forget all the times together

oh, how did you ever forget all of the times

oh, we’re starting out again like a new spring as a flower

you’re the rose in a garden of weeds

and that’s the scent of love

and that’s the scent of love

 

 

My Friend Can't Get A Kiss From A Girl (Autopsy)

 

well, they all say he’s a great guy

pretend that they all like this guy

they become his best friend

and then it’s the end

no, my friend can’t get a kiss from a girl

why, you may ask, (why?)

well, i’ll tell you, (why?)

i’ll tell you right now

you see, my friend wasn’t blessed with dashing good looks, (oh)

and although he has a wonderful personality, he doesn’t have much of a brain, (none?)

that’s what i’ve heard

(i’m looking forward to the autopsy)

autopsy, autopsy, autopsy, autopsy

but wait, he’s not dead yet (huh, yet?)

no, not yet

sorry, i can’t wipe this smile off my face, i’m imagining him dead

(the room’s getting dimmer)

the lights are going out on his love or his life and everything else

i’m looking forward to the autopsy

autopsy, (autopsy), autopsy, (autopsy), autopsy, (autopsy)

autopsy, (autopsy), autopsy, (autopsy), autopsy, (autopsy)

 

 

Everybody Has To Say Goodbye Sometime

 

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

everybody has to say goodbye sometime 

don’t go away, come back, you’re mine, come back at once, you’re blind

everybody has to say goodbye, say goodbye

oh yeah

well, one day i had to say goodbye to a friend of mine

yeah, there was nothing we could do to stop it

cause we all have to do it sometime

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

relationships can be so hard if you don’t realize

what you have to say when it all comes down to the end

we’ve got to say goodbye

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

everybody has to say goodbye sometime

 

 

Britney

 

oh Britney, you came into my life

you speared me with your wonderful looks

oh baby, baby, hit me one more time

you drive me crazy

Britney Spears, you are my hero

and i’m in love with you, and i’m in love with you

oh Britney, Britney, Britney, please take me to your show

show me how the pop stars do it, i want to know

cause one day, one day i’m going to play for fifty thousand screaming fans

and then you’ll probably be out in the crowd

oh Britney, Britney, Britney, i’m in love with you

Britney, Britney, Britney, Britney, please don’t run away

Britney, Britney, Britney, Britney, take me away to a better place

Britney, Britney, you’re my hero

 

 

Nag Champa Down To The Can

 

nag champa down to the can

nag champa down to the can and we got no more scent of love

thank you Ants for bringing me all the nag champa that i could see

from the box that nobody else liked

that’s the life of the free jazz composer

he takes what other people don’t like and he makes it better

but now it’s running out

nag champa down to the can

nag champa burning my hand

nag champa down to the can

nag champa burning, burning, burning my hand



Revenge

The Core

 

born from fission into thermal equilibrium

control the temperature

we’re shimmin’ the rods in, running some leakage

it’s not about the power, it’s not about the power

it’s never stationary anyway

good comrades say, "We like our jobs and it's very cold in Siberia"

we’ll just pull our rods and compensate

they forgot about xenon preclusion, forgot about xenon preclusion, forgot about xenon preclusion, yeah

pullin’ rods, pullin’ rods, pullin’ rods, aaaaaaahhh, spike

prompt critical, aah spike, lots of heat

prompt critical, aah spike, lots of heat

prompt critical, aah spike, lots of heat

prompt critical

 

 

The Ballad of Casanova

 

where are we goin’ anyway?

in search of the lost chord for today

what’s that ya say, Kenny Wayne?

what’s that ya say?

i don’t know about this feeling

this feeling inside my little finger

but ele-bird will save us

chirp, chirp, chirp

flying the nova, Casanova

watch out or you’ll get burned

cool, it burns

cool it, Burns

save the burn, save yourself, Casanova and it’s Chevy Nova

starting to move after the traffic jam

punched the little kid in his stupid hand

coming out the bumper cars cause he hit you in the back

not getting cut no more with the rusted spoke

we’re coming back again

Casanova with a little revenge, woah oh oh oh

flying the nova, the Chevy Nova

watch out or you’ll get burned

cool, it burns

cool it, Burns

save yourself, Casanova, in the Chevy Nova

 

 

A Canadian Novel

 

Dalhousie is my home, on the lovely island of Nova Scotia

i hear it’s a great place to visit to see some Scotian, I mean ocean

they’ve got lots of big things there, like hover craft police

and they’ve got lots of moose but not meese

gourmet popcorn comes from my grandma’s house

she’s got the cheese and the caramel

“bring your own lumber,” is what they said to me

before you come to Halifax but oh, the things you will see oh yes

cause it's Canada and the island (Nova Scotia) in the great up north

it’s not the fifty-first state but we’d sure love to add them to our country cause they’re great

Canada, my Canada, what a novel place

Nova Scotia's got the ocean, lots of ice in that place

they’ve got lumber and hockey and big ol’ scary bears

but you better remember to take your long underwear

it gets kinda cold in the winter months

the summer’s not that hot (it’s not that hot)

so you better not plan to sleep outside on your favorite cot

i sure miss a hammock when i'm here but Halifax is A-okay

Dalhousie, you’re my home, you’re my home today

i said you’re my home today

oh, please take me away to Canada

that’s where I wanna be right now

 

 

A New Hair Cut (Shinpan Rihatsu)

 

girl, you better cut your hair

you look like Master P

what ya thinkin’ about Johnny?

will ya give her another chance?

she sounds like a beat box when she talks

she sounds like a beat box when she talks

cut your hair, cut your hair, cut your hair

shinpan rihatsu, shinpan rihatsu, shinpan rihatsu, shinpan rihatsu

shinpan rihatsu, shinpan rihatsu, shinpan rihatsu, shinpan rihatsu

are the platinum teeth too much for ya Johnny?

 

 

Sixteen Apples

 

one, two, three ... five, six and seven

nine, ten, eleven ... thirteen, fourteen, fifteen

what are we missing?

it’s the multiples of four

where did they go?

oh, we don’t know

but maybe one day we’ll find them and then we can have sixteen apples in the Pristine Chapel

seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty-one

twenty-two, twenty-three, twenty five

twenty-six, twenty-seven, twenty-nine, thirty, thirty-one

thirty-three, thirty-four, thirty-five

what are we missing?

it’s the multiples of four

where did they go?

oh, we don’t know

but maybe one day we’ll find them and then we can have sixteen apples in the Pristine Chapel

thirty-seven, thirty-eight, thirty-nine

forty-one, forty-two, forty-three ... forty-five

forty-six, forty-seven ... forty-nine, fifty-one

and fifty too, as in fifty, also

what are we missing?

it’s the multiples of four

where did they go?

oh, we don’t know

but maybe one day we’ll find them and then we can have sixteen apples in the Pristine Chapel

sixteen apples in the Pristine Chapel

all we need to find is the multiples of four

sixteen apples in the Pristine Chapel

all we need to find is the multiples of four

 

 

Walk The Plank

 

Bruno, why’s your beard so cold and white?

do you not still own that delicatessen

with the fuzzy you know what?

oh oh, oh oh, oh oh

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

take your parrot’s petroleum jelly

it’s not really Pez that we fed him

this is the last sandwich that you’ll make, white beard

one more step to take

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

walk the plank, walk the plank baby

 

 

Wilma

 

she’s tired, i’m ugly

she’s buyin’, i’m hungry

i’m into her and she loves me

she’s into me, she loves me

Curly Sue, is that you when the phone rings at 10 a.m.?

yes, you got me up so early

i'm in love by 10 a.m. 

she takes me out, she takes me fishin’

she lets me eat all the food in the kitchen

she loves my music, i love it too

i love to hear you say, “Fred, I love you.”

Curly Sue, is that you when the phone rings at 10 a.m.?

yes, you got me up so early

i'm in love by 10 a.m.

 

 

Falling Up Steps

  

woah, take it easy man

you’re going up the steps not down

i wondered what sound you’d make

when you’re falling up the steps, not down

so bite the step, bite the step with a face plant

bite the step, bite the step

bite the step, bite the step with a face plant

bite the step, bite the step



Tighten Up

We Bent, You Stank

 

once, twice, three times a high rolling

purty ladies, purty rangs on their fingers showing

what’s that?  princess cut isn’t fine enough?

what’s that?  platinum teeth don’t shine enough?

you ain’t got no room to be hating us

cuz we bent, baby, you know we can’t make it up

yeah, we bent, maybe you’re just not good enough

yeah, we bent, maybe you’re just not good enough

 

big nights, big rides, give her big times

pulling up in the CL-55

what’s that?  think a Benz ain’t fly enough?

what’s that?  a hundred grand don’t buy enough?

you ain’t got no room to be hating us

cuz we bent, baby, you know we can’t make it up

yeah, we bent, maybe you’re just not good enough

yeah, we bent, maybe you’re just not good enough

 

we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank

we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank

we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank

we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank…we bent, you stank

 

 

Break Loose

 

’58 Impala, a ride with your mama

put the pedal to the floor, no, i didn’t try to stop her

she huge, so we cruised

down west 31st , didn’t try to make a move

but that’s okay cuz we listened to the Roots

and to listen to the Roots helps my mind break loose

break loose, break loose

 

shake it, Rhonda, shake it, you need some time?  take it

i know you’re outta shape but come on you gotta shake it

what’s that?  i know you’re not fat

oh, you’re asthmatic?  it’s too bad i never knew that

before we hit the floor here, dancing with the Roots

cuz any party with the Roots helps my mind break loose

break loose, break loose

 

 

The Player's Guild

 

F.L.:      what’s up, what’s up, here i am hood plumbin’ and runnin’

with my girl sittin’ V.I.P. up front, we be stuntin’

at the curb in the Lexus, baby’s ready, let loose

as i walk into the club with my err force two’s

 

L.F.:      with my fifteens bumpin, got the thump in my ride

at the drive-thru window i prefer Biggie fry

straight rollin’ on 20 dub deuces is hot

because i hate driving stock, i changed the paint on my drop top

 

S.G.:     yo, my pocket’s gettin’ heavy totin' Franklins and Grants

since the Jaguars stank, i’ll own the St. Louis Rams

half on, half off, Marshall Faulk’s on my back

with the team-colored sweat bands, that’s where it’s at

 

 

A Big Tyme Diddy

 

you’re the man?  you’re in a hardcore band?  so, what’s your ride?

you drop the jam?  you pick up the fans?  tell me, what’s your ride?

i know you stole the keys to your mother’s Nissan

i know you stole the keys to your mother’s Nissan

 

the Big Tymers know how to roll, not Evanescence, not G.I. Joe

they’ve got the beats to rock the whole street, pulling uptown, baby…twenty fo’s on the feets

burrrrrr, the Birdman goes, swine looks fine on the seats, on the flo’s

gotta Caddy, gotta Benz, gotta Hummer H2, drive ‘em low to the ground so i don’t scuff the shoes

 

you can’t ride like the Big Tymers do, the hardcore brothas ain’t paid that good

you can’t ride like the Big Tymers do, the hardcore brothas ain’t paid that good

you can’t ride like the Big Tymers do, the hardcore brothas ain’t paid that good

you can’t ride like the Big Tymers do, the hardcore brothas ain’t paid that good

 

 

New Ride

 

i’ll jump start your heart when you call out for roadside assistance

i’ll put out flares and give you a ride and we’ll cruise on down the freeway

 

oh, come inside (come inside)

you need a new ride (you need a new ride)

yours ain’t fly (yours ain’t fly)

so get a new ride

 

fret not, your car will be alright but i don’t see how you ever liked it anyway

it ain’t a Lex or a fly new Benz, just a broken down Mercury

 

so come inside (come inside)

you need a new ride (you need a new ride)

yours ain’t fly (yours ain’t fly)

so get a new ride

 

tell you what, let’s head on down to the strip, look at new cars, it’ll be a nice trip

maybe you’ll fall in love with a brand new ride, then you’ll never wanna come inside, right

 

oh, come inside (come inside)

you need a new ride (you need a new ride)

yours ain’t fly (yours ain’t fly)

so get a new ride

 

so come inside (come inside)

you need a new ride (you need a new ride)

yours ain’t fly (yours ain’t fly)

so get a new ride today

 

 

My Baby Knows How To Roll

 

yeah, she’s in to me tightly and rightly so

in a drop top Swedish fine ride we roll

with a six disc changer playing bump in the back

you know we still fly, baby, yo that’s where it’s at

 

we ain’t never going home tonight

we’re gonna keep on rolling ‘til we see the gas light

we ain’t never going home, that’s right

purty baby gonna do that thang all night

 

see my G’s, feel the breeze with the drop top down

adjust the side mirrors, baby, watch the chrome go round

as we pick up some speed, watch the streets light up

my baby shines brighter than any 20” dubs 

 

we ain’t never going home tonight

we’re gonna keep on rolling ‘til we see the gas light

we ain’t never going home, that’s right

purty baby gonna do that thang all night

 

 

Close To Me     * (originally by The Cure)

 

i've waited hours for this, i've made myself so sick
i wish i'd stayed asleep today, yeah
i never thought this day would end
i never thought tonight could ever be this close to me

just try to see in the dark, just try to make it work
to feel the fear before you're here
i pull the shapes out much too close
i pull my eyes out and hold my breath and wait until I shake

but if i had your faith then i could make it safe and clean, so fresh and so clean
if i was only sure that my head on the door was a dream

i've waited hours for this, i've made myself so sick
i wish i'd stayed asleep today
i never thought this day would end

i never thought tonight could ever be this close to me

but if i had your face, i could make it safe and clean, so fresh and so clean
if i was only sure that my head on the door was a dream

 

 

Funky Town (All We Need Is Love)

 

run, don't walk, hurry down to Funky Town

have plenty of time to talk once we get down at Funky Town

no his and hers, nobody currs

you a fly honey, baby, in that raccoon fur

now all we need is a place to put our coats

nah, actually all we need is love

 

when the music plays, i have to follow you to Funky Town

i always want to kiss you once i get down at Funky Town

oh snap, that beat’s a bit heavy

come on, baby, be bop and rock steady

now all we need is a rag to wipe this gas off my Puma

nah, actually all we need is love

 

who are you?  don’t step on my shoes

i didn’t even brang you, i didn’t even brang you

who are you?  don’t step on my shoes

i didn’t even brang you, i didn’t even brang you

 

rock the furs, rock the suede down at Funky Town

the pimps work for free down there at Funky Town

for a good time, baby, try the waterslide

for a good time, baby, try the waterslide

now we just need a towel to dry ourselves off

nah, actually all we need is love

 

who are you?  don’t step on my shoes

i didn’t even brang you, i didn’t even brang you

who are you?  don’t step on my shoes

i didn’t even brang you, i didn’t even brang you

who are you?  don’t step on my shoes

i didn’t even brang you, i didn’t even brang you

who are you?  don’t step on my shoes

i didn’t even brang you, i didn’t even brang you

 

 

Y.E.S.

 

yeah, tranq dart in the jug

yeah, old school, i’m a thug

yeah, baby’s outta control

yeah, baby’s outta control

 

well there ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

 

yeah, like you’re on a bull

yeah, you’re honorable

yeah, what’s that ya say?

yeah, what’s that ya say?

 

well there ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

 

well there ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like you’re on a bull

ain’t no party like a party gone bent cuz a party gone bent’s like…haaaay

 

 

Words

 

words…you say ‘em, we play ‘em

layin’ down fly lines, tighten up, we convey ‘em

you know there’s always gonna be a purty rang when ya say ‘em

there’s always gonna be a purty rang when ya say ‘em

 

words…tell of love and success

hot styles we be rockin’, in tight denim we dress

words flowin’ like fine hair washed with Finesse

words flowin’ like fine hair washed with Finesse

 

words…we’re lyrically portrayin’

layin’ rhymes half the time not knowin’ what we’re sayin’

words…yeah, we’re gonna lay it down now

words…yeah, we’re gonna lay it down now

 

words don’t always make sense but i say ‘em

words don’t always make sense but i say ‘em

words don’t always make sense but i say ‘em

words don’t always make sense but i say ‘em



Bad Day At Work

Bend It Like Becky

 

her name was Becky, she always settled for less

when it came to boys and when it came to living

now Becky was a young, bright flame

just a little low on her kindled spirit

 

her name was Becky

come on and pick it up

you had a broken heart but we fixed it up

we’re all your friends and you’re coming home with us

 

you’ve had some trouble with shadows from your past

but we’re clearing it up and this time it should last

no matter what happens, you can always count on us

we’ll be here for you