BeefGir's Funny Archives

Well we start off with a rather unusual report. If you are a fan of zero punctuation, you will remember that yahtzee put a challenge to the creators of infamous and prototype to draw the other characters protagonist in drag.  Well, they actually did it. Here are the results.

http://kotaku.com/5307391/infamous-defeats-prototype-in-cross+dressing-playoff

 

 

 

Japanese game market is down a whole 25% from last year. This is mostly because the market has not turned out anything as big as it did in 2008 yet.  Sucks for them.

 

 

 

Ghostbusters DLC for little big planet soon.

 

 

 

Download a 2d fighting game for free.

http://kotaku.com/5306881/cute-fighting-and-totally-free

 

 

 

GameStop has a new wii bundle for the summer. One comes with a squirt gun, and another comes with a rubber ducky.  I have no idea what they are trying to achieve with this… but it is very strange.

 

 

 

Atari is facing financial trouble. They have been in shaky territory all year, but they just recently sold the rights to Dragon Ball Z to Namco Bandai for the next 5 years.

 

 

 

Well we know there is a new Zelda game in the works. And with wii motion plus as a requirement to play the game!  Think this will be a whole new experience? Think again.  "I don't think it's going to be that radically different," Shigeru Miyamoto told Nintendo Power. So… what the hell does this mean?

 

 

 

In 1994, 2 guys patented a method for "communicating live while playing the same video game in separate locations". In 2004, they sued Microsoft, accusing Xbox Live and Sony of infringing on that patent.  See, unlike many other cases of this ilk - which are often harmless - this one may have some teeth.  Sony settled with them for an undisclosed sum. But Microsoft is playing stupid games and the trial is still going on.

 

Grease has a video game in the works… um… yay?

 

 

 

Chuck your 360 avatar into a game with “Band of Bugs”

http://kotaku.com/5305452/band-of-bugs-thrusts-your-avatar-into-battle

 

 

 

uncharted 2 is going to have a second multiplayer beta. This one will be easier to get into. Details will come later.

 

 

 

The rumored ps3 slim began production, and will be in stored by possibly July???  That’s what they say. Ship by July, in stores by August. That is, if all this is true. It has yet to be confirmed.   

 

 

 

The Pirate Bay, a BitTorrent website has recently been purchased by Global Gaming Factory X AB. They say they are looking to make the site legit. 

 

 

 

Is there a fable 3 in the works.  Yes there is according to the New York Times, which is typically not wrong about much. More specifically, the Times "Weddings/Celebrations" section is talking about the next Fable game. Yes, Fable III is being mentioned alongside the announcement of Lionhead designer Joshua Atkins' weekend wedding. PR is so weird!

 

 

 

Fuck it. I cant even sum up this article about kingdom hearts 3. just read it.

http://kotaku.com/5303476/tetsuya-nomura-on-kingdom-hearts-3

thats all for this week

this weeks image is...

Well we have had an eventful week. though a little morbid.  death seems to be on the war path.  Ed McMohan, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, and Billy Mays all died this week.  Billy mays came out of nowhere, and i probably cared about him the most. he did come off as a bit of a dick, but i still claim that i saw his first Oxi Cleen infomercial years ago before saturday morning cartoons. 
Anyway, hes dead now.  moving on.



Batman Arkham Asylum achievements where released. 
http://www.xbox360achievements.org/game/batman-arkham-asylum-pc/achievements/



Marvel vs Capcom 2 is not coming out for xbox marketplace june 29th. The developers released this message yeasterday.
"MvC2 is not actually coming out on June 29, sorry guys. Not sure where that rumor came from, but it's going to be closer to the end of July."

word is out that Sony is working with a phone company in order to make a system that will give the iphone a run for its money. no more information is known, but there is a meeting between these 2 companies some time next month.

 

 

 

Sony is also insisting that the psp go has aps that are not just games.  Sounds like even more competition for the iphone.

Midway games was officially bought out by Warner Brothers. so all creative properties like mortal combat and all that other stuff now belong to Warner Brothers.

The next Professor Layton game is not going to be very different, but really, what more could you want?  a game dedicated to puzzles with an interesting story to link them all together. Sounds like a good concept to me. I think the first game was solid enough that there is no need for changing.  there is word that there will be more animated scenes though.

 

 

 

Ps3 and 360 may get a price cut by the fall.

Sony insists that the ps3 will not get a price cut though.

 

 

 

Here is a detailed review of the new batman game.

http://kotaku.com/5302101/batman-arkham-asylum-preview-a-thinkers-brawling-game

 

 

 

this is going to sound a little strange but the PSP GO is $249 because it's new, and Sony knows (or at least believes) that the kind of people who will buy something when it's new will pay more for it than they probably should. Kinda evil, but they have a point.

 

 

 

Super sweet beard for little big planet

http://kotaku.com/5302758/this-is-probably-the-longest-beard-in-video-games

 

 

 

Uncharted movie in the works.  I may have said they before. But its happening.

 

 

 

Hivemind has been added to the internet terms.

 

 

 

There is a new Sega toy coming out in July. The "Retro Gen" is a hand held device that is said to be able to play old sega games, along with games downloaded to an sd card.  And its only $50. sounds like a cheep version of the psp, but who knows what it may do. 

http://kotaku.com/5302725/new-sega-handheld-coming

 

 

 

Sony has a new silver controller. Woop-de-fucking-do.

 

 

 

If you have the first left 4 dead on the pc, valve just enabled custom campaigns.  So you can edit your own campaign and make your own maps. Sounds like a lot of fun. 

 

 

 

Here is a very long interview with robot chicken on the topic of video games.

http://kotaku.com/5299224/when-robot-chicken-meets-video-games

 

 

 

Serious Sam has been remade for the xbox live arcade in HD. I never actually played the original game, so I think I may pick this one up. 

 

 

 

Turns out how the crackdown team that is working on crackdown 2 is not a whole new team.  Half the staff worked on the first game are working on the second game. and they where hired for that very purpose. Also, they have a new map. It wont be the same map from the first game. I never thought there would be, but someone felt that it needed to be mentioned. 

 

 

 

Don't want to play wii games with the wii remote?  Well if the game does not require wii controls, then you can now use the ps2 controller.  With this new adapter for $19.

http://kotaku.com/5302381/turn-playstation-controller-into-wii-remote

 

 

Square Enix is being sued for 5 million.

http://kotaku.com/5302333/square-enix-sued-for-5-million

 

 

Metroid prime trilogy box art.

http://kotaku.com/5302287/roll-metroid-prime-trilogy-box-art-up-into-your-life

 

 

 

review of the new DS Zelda game

http://kotaku.com/5302169/the-legend-of-zelda-spirit-tracks-preview-pigs-might-fly

 

 

looks like tingle will be getting 2 spin off titles for the DS. I could care less, but the picture in the top left corner of this magazine ad just cracks me up, and scares me at the same time.

http://kotaku.com/5301905/not-one-new-tingle-title-but-two

 

 

 

looks like rock star England hit a big mile stone on the development of one of there projects, and then the next day a bunch of people where out of a job.  Rockstar fired 10 percent of there staff. No reason was given. But the upside is that rockstars severance package is rather generous, and the company is even helping some of them to find new jobs.

 

 

 

Some guy tried to rob a GameStop in East Liberty, PA. Despite exceptionally high security, he managed to get into the store easily enough. It was getting out that was the problem.

See, with all kinds of locks and shutters on the front door, back door and windows, the thief figured he'd break in by crashing through the roof. Which he did! Easy as pie. But then he looked around the store. Front door was locked, he couldn't open it. Back door was locked, he couldn't open it.

He was trapped.

So he dragged a filing cabinet under the hole in the roof, climbed up on it and left the way he came in. Empty-handed. Way to go, genius.

 

 

 

Modern warfare 2 will have 2 player co-op. and that is ONLY 2 player co-op.  they will not have 4 because they say that once you move past 2 players, the whole experience becomes way more of a cluster fuck.  So 2 player co-op it is.

 

 

If you reserve assassins creed 2 at gamestop, you get a code that unlocks an ancient building for you to fuck around in.  the place is supposed to be fancy and stuff, and have treasure and all that. Sounds fun. So go reserve your copy today.

 

 

This game for the DSi looks like it will be scary as shit.

http://kotaku.com/5300915/ghostwires-augmented-reality-in-action-on-dsi

 

 

 

apparently duke nukem forever is still being worked on.  3d realms plans to keep working on the game. Though when they will finish, when they have to more staff is a different issue.

 

 

 

Several months back the Sims 3 was leaked onto the internet, and downloaded by everyone who cared.  I did not, so I don't know what happens first hand.  Anyway, EA says that they leaked the game on purpose.  The leaked game was a demo that only had half the content. You get the other half when you register online with EA.  So the leak is only half the game. 

 

 

 

Game developers can use Microsoft's avatars in games, but they have to fallow this loooong list of rules for what they can and can not do. 

http://kotaku.com/5299506/what-not-to-do-with-xbox-360-avatars-drugs-decapitation-fluids

 

 

 

the word that there was going to be a new Xbox in 2010 is not true once again.  Apparently the guy who said something about it had misspoken and Microsoft has spent the last week putting out fires. There is no new console. And they urge us to stop talking about it.

 

 

 

This is actually pretty cool, a custom desktop that you can make yourself.  Check it out.

http://kotaku.com/5299202/this-is-not-a-halo-3-screenshot

 

 

Here's a pleasant change from seeing your average celebrity gushing over a video game: seeing a celebrity troll on the Wii.

Seems that while Shia LaBeouf is a big-time gamer, he's only a big-time gamer on the 360 and PS3. Which he seems to quite enjoy. When it comes to the Wii, however...things get trollish.

Speaking with Big Download, he says:

(BD) Have you checked out the Wii Transformers game?

(SL) I haven't been able to play the Wii game because my hand is broken. I've just been playing Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3. I would imagine that the Wii experience will be like...I don't mess with the Wii, to be honest with you. It's kind of an amateur console. I'm not into the Wii thing.

(BD)What's wrong with the Wii?

(SL)This is how in a simple way you can find out if it's a gamer you want to play with. Ask them if they have a Wii. If they say yes, get the f*** out of there.

He later follows that up with "Who wants to play the Wii version of LEGO Star Wars. I'd rather eat glass.". Even though the Wii version is, well, for all intents and purposes identical to the other ones.

Bet Activision and Krome Studios, the people behind the Wii version of the upcoming Transformers game, are just delighted with his promotional abilities.

this weeks image is...

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