Well, I wasn't always fat. Back in my high school days, I weighed about 128 lbs and wore a size 9 in Juniors on my heaviest day and thought I was fat! What I wouldn't do to wear a Juniors 9 today! After I graduated from high school, I got pregnant with my daughter and gave birth to her in September 1993, a month before I turned 20 years old. I was involved in an abusive relationship with her father and by time my daughter had turned 2, I had had enough and finally told her dad to get out. Best choice I ever made.
At my highest weight pregnant, I was 174. Kind of depressing when I think that at my highest weight ever (not pregnant), I weighed in at 258.5. Believe that? That is so depressing. Well, good thing is I've finally decided that's it.
Four years ago, I lost 69 lbs on my own. No special diet - just completely cut out all junkfood. It was a rigid diet, but it worked. I exercised my bootay off and kept the weight off for over two years. Then, my world fell apart. My granny (who was a very big part of my life) passed away and guess what I did to cope with it? I ate. The biggest comfort to me was food. Knowing darn well that Granny would be disappointed that I had let myself go, I still ate. Shortly after Granny passed, another blow...my boyfriend (at the time) and I had a very nasty split and again, I ate. I ate myself right back up to where I was before plus more. The day I stepped on the scale and saw 258.5, I just couldn't believe it. Why did I let myself get so out of hand?
I had tried Weight Watchers three times in the past. It worked each time, but each time I quit after about 20 lbs gone. I was attending meetings each time, but I got nothing from the leader I had. I really wished she had been more like the other great leaders I keep hearing about on the WW Boards, but she wasn't. It got to the point where I just would show up to get weighed and then I'd leave to go pig out on whatever I wanted. That was not working for me, so I quit and I quit and I quit.
On September 17, 2003, I decided enough is enough. I don't know why it hit then (a very unusual time for me to start a "diet"), but it did. I decided to take another crack at Weight Watchers and this time, decided to do it online only. It was one of the best decisions I ever made. I have made wonderful, inspirational friends on the Weight Watchers' message boards. It truly is an amazing community of people. For once in my life, I have come to realize that this isn't a race, this is a way of life. I take my gains with grace and take my maintains with pride. Of course, losses ROCCCKKKKKKKKK! I also became more active. On November 1, 2003, I walked into Curves and enjoyed (yeah, you read that right...enjoyed) my first workout there. Now, I look for moments here and there to get some activity in, whether it be a workout at Curves, a taebo workout at home, a long country walk, a bike ride, a game of tennis, you name it. I'm so happy and totally enjoying my new lifestyle. I have a long way to go, but with the help and support of the wonderful people on the WW Boards, I know this is going to happen. Hopefully, one day I can be an inspiration just like so many others have been to me.
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